Hey guys! I have the second part here! I know things might be getting off to a bit of a slow start, but stick around and I promise you won't be disappointed!
Also, Hetalia isn't my own work; it's the baby and creation of Hidekaz Himaruya!
Read and review please!
Prologue Part 2: The Comedown
One month after Alfred's suicide...
The air in the room was tense. Everyone was on edge, and dead quiet. They had had nothing to say.
All nine Nations that were involved in The Incident sat around a mahogany table, not sure what was going to happen. They just knew Canada was coming, and he was ten minutes late. Arthur wondered if Matthew was doing this deliberately, to draw out their anxiety.
Suddenly the doors swung open. Matt stormed in, his steps frantic and he was absolutely livid.
In all honesty, Arthur did not blame the boy.
"I think you all have a pretty good idea why I called only you to this little meeting, eh?" Matt asked sharply. He didn't even bother attempting to sound polite.
They all knew why. But they had no way of being able to say it. Finally, Francis broke the silence.
"Mathieu, you knew that Alfred –"
Matt angrily interrupted, "I knew that Alfred was going to be scolded for causing the recession and you were going to tell him to shape up and fix it. What I didn't know was that you would do... that to him!"
Despite his best efforts, tears began to trickle down Matt's face as he rambled on. "I could've prevented all of this. If I had just come with him, if I'd been a little more assertive, if I had just grabbed his arm a little tighter and told him I had a bad feeling about all this..."
Kiku tried to diffuse the situation, his tone calm as usual. "Williams-san, please be reasonable."
He realized immediately he touched a nerve, and Matt flew off the handle.
"NO! I! WILL! NOT!" Matt screamed. The rage that he had kept bottled up inside finally exploded like a volcano, destroying everything in its path. Everyone cringed in their seats, knowing Matt could be a real and frightening force to be reckoned with when he put his mind to it.
"I don't see why I should be reasonable, when you sure as hell weren't! If you can name one, just one reasonable justification for your actions, then I would love to hear it!"
Feliciano curled into a frightened fetal position, while Yao simply buried his face in his hands, and Gilbert's eyes darted around, looking for any escape.
Matt seethed, "Don't tell me to be reasonable. I mean, really, after everything Alfred did for you guys in the past, despite his mistakes, it wasn't good enough for you. But you know what the worst part about this is? Do you?!"
Matt took their silence as a yes, and continued, "Alfred killed himself not because it hurt too much to go on, but because he really honestly believed you all hated him. He thought he was nothing but a failure and an idiot that you would be happier and better off without. And the thought of committing suicide with the belief that your whole life was a fuck up is bad enough on its own without applying it to someone like Alfred. And he was always into those heroic stories and all that stuff so much so, that he really hoped his own story would end happily too."
He then held up a DVD for all of them to see and continued, "And you know something else? This right here wasn't even the first suicide attempt Alfred made since that day. This just happened to be the one that ended successfully. And you know why? Because you all continued to go on as though you did nothing wrong, and like Alfred himself was the one with a problem. That was the last straw for him."
Ivan stammered, "But... the economy... the stocks were getting better a couple months ago." His voice was broken and his usual borderline insanity now replaced with something that seemed to resemble... regret.
Matt's eyes dangerously narrowed, his rage more focused. "You still honestly have no clue what you've really caused, huh, Braginsky? Well, let me tell you what wasn't detailed on the tape. Several nights over those six months, I would wake Alfred up from a nightmare about that day and I would hold him as he cried, sing him to sleep, and stay by his side the rest of the night. I've lost count of the number of times I've seen him passed out in the bathroom or in a puddle of vomit, because he drank himself to a stupor the night before, trying to dull the pain of the damage you helped to cause. I've had to keep my eye on him, to make sure he wouldn't do something to harm himself, feeling paranoid every single day. I would look into his eyes, broken and blank, seeing and knowing that he didn't trust anyone... he could barely even trust me. I tried – no; I did my absolute fucking hardest to take care of him. Clearly, my best wasn't good enough."
Arthur swallowed vomit. It was painful enough to hear Alfred on that tape that horrible day when Matthew broadcast it for every Nation to see at that fateful meeting exactly one month ago. It was even worse to hear this, to hear from Matthew just the true extent of the damage he helped to cause. And literally feel the horrible truth sink in.
He was a hypocrite and a monster.
Matt continued, "Know this, all of you. Many of the Nations, when they found out, wanted nothing more than to grab the nearest weapon they had and give you all a taste of your own medicine. But that would mean declaring war, and we can't do that because this doesn't actually affect the people. But most of all is that unlike any of you, I'm a man of my word and I honored Alfred's request not to let that happen."
Everyone's eyes widened.
"Yeah, that's right," Matt spat viciously, "Alfred, the very same one you humiliated and raped for an insignificant recession, the only one with every good right and reason to take any revenge on you, pleaded with me in a personal final letter not to let the others hurt any of you. He wrote that it was because he didn't think he was worth it, that his life should be avenged, and he didn't want to cause more trouble.
"If we were humans, I would ignore Alfred's last request. I'd be in a police station right now actually, reporting you and prosecuting you, looking to put you all behind bars for life, or put to death. Because what you did was unacceptable and unforgiveable," Matt snarled.
Feliciano sobbed, "I tried to apologize though! I didn't even want to hurt Alfred in the first place!"
Matt just looked at Feliciano. Most of the anger disappeared from his face, but not all of it. If anything, he looked more disappointed than anything else.
Matt simply sighed, "Next time, think for yourself, Feliciano."
With that, Feliciano quickly became a sobbing mess, and the others could only silently stare at their hands, their shoes, or the carpet; unable to face Matt, each other, and most of all, themselves.
In a resigned and bitter tone, Matt said, "But I can't ever give my brother justice, because we're Nations, and things just aren't that simple. We have people to serve and jobs to do. There's no proof to give to your bosses and we've never killed a Nation before for their atrocities – even if they did arguably deserve it."
As Matt said this, his gaze drifted towards Ludwig, Kiku and Ivan, who visibly flinched under his scrutinizing glare.
No one protested or tried to make excuses. They had nothing.
"But we can show you and remind you of your crimes. None of you are personally welcome. Since you're still too important, the other Nations and I will continue to maintain our diplomatic and economic ties with you, and we'll treat your people and bosses with respect, but none of you are our friends anymore. It's not a lot, but it is something."
He decided to conclude things.
"You know, Alfred and I did have our differences. I'll be the first to admit that we didn't always get along with each other. However, he was still my brother, and the only blood family I knew I had in this world. Just think about that for a minute and then maybe you will have some idea of just how much pain I am in right now. I just want to be able to grieve without being reminded of why. But that's impossible, because every day, I have look at myself in the mirror, and know that it's my fault that this happened."
Matt looked over each of them, and he couldn't help but feel a smug, albeit somewhat hollow sense of satisfaction at their shame.
"None of you are looking very well," he sarcastically snorted. "Well golly gee gosh, I wonder why."
And with that, Matt stormed out, slamming the door so hard, it could've broken.
Things were silent again until Lovino was the first to burst out.
"You!" he screamed, pointing at Ivan. "This is all your fault! If you hadn't been so horrible, he never would've done this!"
Ivan stood up, incredulous at Lovino's accusation, firing back, "Oh, so I'm the only one to blame?! Look who's talking! You were the one who was egging on Francis with taking those pictures!"
Lovino and Ivan's spat seemed to awaken something nasty, and it didn't take long for things to escalate. The whole room devolved into a storm of defensive statements, several Nations playing the blame game on each other, and one pair even wrestling each other to the floor.
Arthur had enough and he climbed on top of the table and screamed, "Shut up! All of you shut the bloody fuck up, right now!"
When things quieted down, Arthur ranted on, "Honestly, have you forgotten what it means to be civilized? This is all of our faults! Everything! Up to and including the financial crisis that got us here in the first place!"
Arthur then collapsed, curled up into a ball and shaking as he quietly cried tears of rage. And they could all see it now.
They were all too stubborn to admit responsibility, to admit their own faults. So they found their perfect scapegoat with Alfred. Sure, he wasn't perfect, and his mistakes might have hurt them, but it wasn't like he meant for this to happen, for things to get so bad. And he always believed in the best of everyone, and he trusted them with his life.
And they destroyed every last bit of that trust like it meant nothing to them.
Living with the fact that they drove Alfred to this and knowing they would never be able to right their wrongs was their own punishment.
And it was something Arthur, Francis, Feliciano, Lovino, Ludwig, Gilbert, Kiku, Yao and Ivan would all have to live with for the rest of their lives.
Well, what do you think? Don't be shy! A review is very appreciated - love it, constructive criticism, whatever! :)
I have to admit, it was pretty cathartic to write this chapter out. But the best is yet to come. Sit tight dear readers!
Kizuna out!