Santana's P.O.V.
I haven't talked to Quinn in about a week for my own reasons. She's been trying to talk to me and has apologized but that's not the reason I haven't talked to her. I don't even care about that anymore, I'm not talking to her because I didn't know what to do. Since I'm sort of ahead of plan with finding her and being her friend, I now have to get her to trust me and figure out a way to kill her. I'm thinking cutting her brake lines but I want to be more creative. The one problem I'm having with this is that when I try to think of ways to kill her...my chest hurts. It's like this suffocating pressure on my lungs. A tightness that only goes away once I stop. I think I may have to see a doctor about that.
Not talking to Quinn this week has been a problem in my plan too so I called her today. Even though I was pissed she was trying to get close to me, I have to accept that she will want to because she wants to be my friend. Also letting her in is an essential part of my plan now. I reconstructed my plan just to move it along faster. It's fucking obvious Quinn is into me so I'm going to use that to my advantage. I'm going to ask her out on a date. I think fake dating her gets me closer a lot faster than a friendship. I'll need a few months to get her to fall in love with me and then I'll break her heart and make her death look like a suicide. It's perfect. Girl takes her own life because she can't cope with heart break.
Today I told her I felt bad about how I snapped and I wanted to take her to lunch. She agreed and now we're sitting in some Italian place called Breadstix. The breadsticks here are fucking amazing and I think I just found my new favorite restaurant...ever. I mean this is better than some of the food I actually had in Italy. It's so good.
"Slow down, the food hasn't even came yet." Quinn says as I take a bite of my third breadstick. She giggles when I look at her and I shrug and finish chewing.
"I can eat a lot more than you'd think." She laughs more and when she comes down from her laughter something changes. Since we've got here I've noticed Quinn seems like she's had something on her mind.
"Alright, What's up?" I say and she looks at me confusedly.
"What?"
"I can tell somethings bothering you. What is it?" I ask then take another bite of my breadstick. Quinn sighs and looks around the restaurant before looking back to me.
"I'm just stressed."
"Why?" I ask.
"My parents."
"What about them?" I probe.
"They just...they want me to be something I'm not." She says and sighs again.
"They want me to be some CEO of a huge multi billion dollar company one day." I mock gasp.
"What?! How dare they want you to be successful." I say and it gets her to crack a smile.
"Not like that I just mean...I don't know if that's something I want to do. I don't really know what I want to do." She says and I nod.
"So why don't you tell them?" I ask.
"I can't. It's either their way or no way." She says.
"So you'd rather do something you don't want to then tell your parents you want to do something else?" I ask and she sighs.
"I don't have a choice in this anyway."
"You always have a choice Quinn." I say then the waitress appears with our food. She sits our plates in front of us then walks away.
"You have to do what makes you happy you know? Life is short and you don't want to spend the time you have doing something you hate." I say and she nods.
"Well I could say the same about you." She says and I raise an eyebrow at her.
"You told me that you've traveled and done all these things but you haven't experienced the little things that make people happy. You haven't been in love and you don't want a family." She says and I nod. It's not that I don't want those things, it's just something I can't have.
"I don't see how this relates." I say and begin eating.
"It relates because you just told me life is short and I should try to be happy."
"And relationships make people happy?" I ask and she chuckles.
"Yeah, they do Santana. When you can have another person you're 100 percent comfortable with, flaws and all, they just understand you like no one else and still love you at the end of the day, having that makes people happy."
"Really? Because good sex could do it for me." I say and she scoffs and shakes her head.
"It's not that I'm against love and all that sappy shit, it's just that it hasn't happened and I don't think it will or at least not anytime soon." I say as Quinn eats.
"That attitude can cause you to miss out on love. Do you really give the people you date or yourself a chance to have your heart?" Well...I've never really thought about that. I...guess I haven't.
"I probably haven't because once I get into a relationship, I sort of give it a time limit."
"What?" She says surprised.
"Yeah. The max is like three months, if it makes it that far but normally it's over by one and a half." Quinn shakes her head.
"Who ends it? You or them?"
"Them. If it got to three months I'd probably end it."
"What are their reasons?" She asks.
"I'm distant, emotionally detached and just plain cold."
"Do you do that on purpose?" She asks and I shrug. I sort of do but whatever.
"What makes you think I would purposely do that?" I ask.
"Because you seem like one of those people who would. You don't want to fall in love or get feelings for someone because you think it won't work out and you'll get hurt." Quinn says. I stop eating and look at her.
"Maybe you should be a shrink because this psychoanalysis is in direct correlation with that."
"I'm not psychoanalyzing you. I just have that one thought about you and why you won't let people in." She says.
"I think you just want me to let you in." I say and she shrugs.
"Maybe I do." She says then continues eating.
Quinn's P.O.V.
Santana is an interesting person. It's like I get her but I don't. I can just tell that she's a softie under her hard shell but trying to get to that core is taking some work. I know I haven't known her that long but I have this weird pull towards her, like gravity. I couldn't really leave her alone if I wanted to. I want to know everything about her and I don't know why. I've never felt this attracted to someone before and I don't mean physically, this attraction far bypasses that. It's...words can't describe and the feeling I get when I see her, talk to her or even hear her name, it's so powerful I feel like I need to hold something to keep my grasp on reality.
It's been like this since the moment we met. It's the strangest thing because we don't know each other that well yet but when I'm around her, I feel like I've known her my whole life. I think it's the reason I'm so blatant with my flirting. I want her to know I'm interested. Her past with relationships doesn't even bother me because I could see myself being her one successful relationship. I know I sound like some crazy obsessed maniac but Santana has changed my views on people falling in love at first sight. I want her and I am determined to have her, one way or another.
After lunch I convinced Santana to just walk with me. I know she hates the cold but she agreed after I promised coffee later. I felt bad about the thing with her parents. I should just left it alone but we're passed that now.
"I love the snow." I say as we walk down an empty residential street. Across the street is a park and it's the park I've been coming to since I was kid.
"What? You enjoy this shit? It's a fucking death trap." She says and I chuckle.
"I'm serious. The other day I thought I stepped on snow, or what I thought was snow. It was ice and I almost died." I laugh harder and she nudges my shoulder with hers.
"Shut up." She says with a smirk gracing her lips. I nudge her shoulder back and we keep walking.
"It's nice. It's calming." I say and she shrugs.
"I guess it looks nice when it first falls. It's like the world stills and it looks nice and pure but it's an illusion. Once it stops snowing and the world starts moving again, it's polluted with dirt and it goes back to being ugly. The perfect representation of the world we live in."
"I didn't know you were so poetic and metaphorical." I say jokingly. She rolls her eyes but chuckles lightly.
"I have my moments." I smile and grab her hand. The second our hands connect I feel a jolt of electricity and I have to take a deep breath to bring myself back to reality. Santana looks at me with her deep brown eyes and I clear my throat.
"Let's cross the street." I say nervously but she nods. I try to let my hand slip from hers but she grips it. I glance at her but she keeps her head forwards as we cross the street.
"We're going to a park in the winter?" She asks and I nod.
"I don't see why not." I say as we make our way to the park. I guide us towards the playground and the swings.
"I used to come here all the time when I was a kid." I say and Santana looks over at me. We stare into each others eyes for a few seconds before she speaks.
"Cool." Is all she says and we continue walking until we reach the swings. It snowed last night but it's not as cold today even though it's February. In Ohio our winters don't really end until March so this is nothing surprising. Santana brushes some snow off of two swings next to each other then sits in one. I sit in the one next to her. She grips the chains with her bare hands and looks down at the snow.
"My dad used to bring me here." I say and she looks over to me.
"When I was younger, it was something he and I did together. He and my sister would watch sports together." Santana nods her head and her eyes drop back to the ground as she pushes herself gently on the swing.
"When I was little...my parents and I always cooked together. It was our thing. After I did homework and my father came home, we'd make dinner, dance and then talk about our days as we ate together." She says softly. She reaches for her locket and runs her thumb back and forth over the metal.
"That's sweet." I say and she shakes her head.
"Not really. It was short lived...I...I lost my parents when I was 11." Santana says then takes a deep intake of breath.
"I'm sorry." I say and Santana doesn't respond but looks down at the snow.
"Santana?" I call but she still doesn't respond. I stand from the swing and slowly walk to her, the only noise being the gentle wind and the crunch of snow under my boots. I stand in front of her and she lifts her head enough for me to see the lone tear falling down her cheek. I wipe the tear with the pad of my thumb and she stands from the swing. She looks me in my eyes again before dropping her head and I pull her into a hug, putting my arms over her shoulders. She doesn't respond immediately but she eventually does wrap her arms around my waist. I don't know how long we stood there but it doesn't really matter. Santana drops her arms and pulls back from the hug.
When she looked in my eyes before I hugged her, I saw the sadness and the broken hearted child mourning over the loss of her parents. My heart broke for her in that moment. I don't know what I would have done if I lost both of my parents.
"I don't need your pity." She says as she moves away from me.
"What? I don't pity you Santana." I say and she shakes her head and puts her hands in her pockets.
"You do. Everyone does."
"Not me. I'm sorry you lost your parents but I don't pity you. I would pity you if you let the loss of them drive you to drugs or alcohol but that's not the case. You lost your parents but a your smart and independent woman. I have nothing to take pity on." Santana bites her lip, drops her head then nods. I move closer to her and lock my arm with hers.
"I believe I owe you a coffee." I say and she lifts her head.
"Yeah and I'm getting the biggest one possible for you making me cry." She says and I chuckle softly then we start to walk.
"That's fine. You can even get a muffin or something if you want."
"Mhm. If you tell anyone about what just happened, ever, I will kill you." She says and I roll my eyes.
"Sure you will." I say and Santana laughs softly.
A/N: So I'm aware that it's moving slowly since I did write it. It will eventually speed up but I wanted their progression to be a slow process. More will be coming soon.