I swear I'm getting lazier and lazier. Maybe it's because school starts in a couple weeks. QAQ This chapter's for Ayumi Kudou!

Song: I'll Make A Man Out Of You

Lilli Zwingli peeked out at the military encampment farther down the mountain and let out a shaky sigh. It couldn't be that hard to pass herself off as a boy could it? She just needed some practice! She already looked like a younger version of her brother with her short hair and she'd left her ribbons behind when she'd run away, she just needed some practice. A nudge on her shoulder made her scream and turn around but it was only her horse. Lilli laughed and patted his nose, "You scared me Roderich. I'll need to work on that, boys don't yell like little girls." How did boys act? She thought on it for a while and tried puffing out her chest and speaking in a deeper cadence. She she practiced walking up to the recruitment officer, "Excuse me? Where do I sign in? I see you have a gun, I have one too! They're very manly and tough- WAHH!" she shrieked again as she tried to pull her rifle over her head but ended up falling.

Roderich neighed loudly, almost as if he was laughing. Lilli pouted, "I'm working on it!"

"Ksesese! You'll need more zhan practice to succeed girly!" a strange, hissing voice called from up above her. She looked up and saw a pure white lizard laying on top of a tree branch. Puffs of smoke were coning out of it's nostrils and it's glowing red eyes frightened her,

"A ghost lizard!" she squeaked, running behind Roderich who didn't look at all impressed.

The lizard protested loudly, "Oi, I'm a dragon, a lindwurm! No lizard, I don't do zhat veird tongue zhing."

As if that was any better, Lilli thought. "Um... who are you?"

The liz- dragon jumped and landed gracefully on the ground, "Who am I? Who am I? I am zhe powerful, zhe pleasurable, zhe awesome Gilbert! I have been sent by your ancestor, Wilhelm, to aid you in your deception and keep you alive!" He paused and pointed a finger at Lilli, "You do know zhat the penatly for disguising as a man in the army is death right?" Lilli nodded.

"I don't understand though, why would my ancestor send something so... tiny?" Lilli confessed.

Gilbert waved off her concern and jumped onto Roderich's saddle much to his annoyance. "Ksesese! Of course, zhe awesome me is travel size for your convenience (I'm not small by zhe vay, I'm fun sized). If I vas my real size your cow here vould die of fright." Roderich snapped at him but Gilbert scurried farther out of his reach. He continued bragging, "My awesome powers are far beyond your mortal imagination. For instance, my eyes can see straight through your clothes," he added, looking at Lilli's chest area. With an indignant huff Lilli smacked him off of the horse and back onto the ground.

The dragon sat up and rubbed his cheek. "OW! Oh zhat's it! Dishonor! Dishonor on your whoooole family! Dishonor on you, dishonor on your cow!-" Lilli knelt down behind him and placed a hand over his mouth,

"Stop! I'm sorry!" She looked down at her lap. "I'm just nervous, I've never done anything like this before." Gilbert's eyes softened and he grabbed one of her hands in both of his,

"Zhen you're going to have to trust me, and no more slapping!" Lilli smiled a bit but there was still fear in her eyes. Gilbert saw this and looked around wildly until he spotted a cricket with a curly antenna sitting on a leaf nearby. He snatched it and held it up for Lilli's inspection. "Don't vorry, I brought a lucky cricket vith me, see?" Lilli cupped her hands around the terrified cricket and her smile grew.

"What's its name?"

"Uh...uh...Matthew!"

Lilli giggled, "What a cute name!" She handed the bug back to Gilbert and stood up. "We should get going," she said, walking back to her horse. Roderich snorted angrily as Gilbert once again hopped on his back but didn't dare do anything while Lilli was there too. As they traveled down the mountain a question popped into Gilbert's mind,

"Hey, don't you have a bruder? Vhy isn't he fighting?"

The girl flushed and looked down at the reins. "Big brother has always been neutral when it comes to war. I'd hate for him to have to give that up so... I came instead."

"You're brave," Gilbert whistled. "Zhat's awesome. I'll get you through this, you'll see!"

"Who's the runt?"

Lilli flinched as a loud, obnoxious voice rang over the crowd of men. There could be no doubting who he was talking about, she was shorter than all of them by at least a head! She could feel Gilbert, who'd hidden in the back of her shirt, wriggle irately. A slow turn revealed the rude soldier; he was a tall, broad shouldered young man with dirty blonde hair and bright blue eyes half-hidden by glasses, mischief and a handsome face. What drew her attention was not his good looks however, it was his cowlick that seemed to defy gravity. The man-child sauntered over to Lilli and looked up and down what little there was of her. "The military must be scraping at the bottom of the barrel if you're here," he commented in an irritating American accent. Lilli blushed and tried to stand up straighter.

"Should I bite him? I could bite him," Gilbert offered from his hiding place. Lilli gave an almost imperceptible shake of her head.

A smaller man with wild blonde hair and angry green eyes stomped up and smacked the American upside the head, "Leave him alone you git, you have the manners of a barracuda!" With a jolt Lilli realized that the man was talking about "him". I'll have to get used to being called a boy...

The American whined piteously, "That was mean Arthur!"

"So was your behavior!"

"What?! I'm just tellin' the truth here!"

Arthur rolled his eyes and started pushing him away, "Go on with you. Make yourself useful for once somewhere else." Grumbling, the taller man complied and Arthur turned back to Lilli. "I apologize for that. Alfred doesn't mean anything by it, truly."

Lilli nodded weakly and whispered, "Thank you."

She just remembered to make her voice lower in time so Arthur remained oblivious for the moment. With a smile he held out his hand and whispered, "I'm Arthur Kirkland by the way."

Lilli returned the favor, "I'm Li-" She broke off and pretended to cough. Arthur raised an eyebrow,

"Liam?"

"Lindsey!" Gilbert hissed into Lilli's ear. "Vait, zhat's to girly. Linnaeus, Lionel, oh vait! I had a friend named Lieven!"

"Lieven!" Lilli half shouted. "Lieven Zwingli. Or...Li for short..." her voice trailed back into a whisper.

A loud clanging coming from the mess tent followed by loud cursing mercifully distracted Arthur from the trembling "boy". "Oh for the love of- If Alfred's not behind it then I'm a teacup," He dashed off to the tent and all too soon Lilli was standing completely alone in the see of tents... wait, where were the rest of the soldiers?!

Her guardian dragon wrapped his tail around her neck and cranked it so she was looking to her left. All the men were lining up in rows, some of them even gestured for her to join them. What on earth was going on?!

"Soldier!" A loud commanding voice right behind her made her spin around and she found herself looking eye to eye with possibly the scariest man she'd ever seen. He wasn't physically unappealing; he was Asian, around middle height (not as tall as Alfred but a bit taller than Arthur) with long black hair drawn back in a ponytail and lovely brown eyes. It was the eyes that threw here off though, they were glaring at her so fiercely she was afraid she'd be turned to stone. He leaned in until they were almost nose to nose. "What do you think you're doing?"

"I-I-" Lilli cursed her dry mouth and tried to speak comprehensibly.

The man, or officer as was probably the case, cut her off and barked, "Who are you?"

"Lieven Zwingli..."

The officer blinked in surprise and leaned back a bit, "You aren't by any chance related to the Vash Zwingli, are you?"

How would a military man know about big brother? Vash had never been anywhere near the army...right? But this man seemed to know and respect him, maybe this could be used in her favor. She couldn't be directly tied with Vash though or her secret might come out a lot sooner than she wanted it to. "Yes, he's my aunt's cousin's nephew...twice removed."

The glare was back, but a bit softer than before, "I see." He pointed to the rest of the men, "Get in line."

Lilli was all too happy to comply. She scurried to the back of the group and stood next to a giant of a man with soft looking ashy blonde hair and purple eyes. "Privet comrade," he greeted in a thick Russian accent. Lilli smiled at his friendly manner but snapped back to attention when the officer began shouting.

"I am Yao Wang, but you will address me as Captain Wang or simply Captain. Is that understood?"

"Sir, yes Sir!" Everyone shouted.

Captain Wang stalked up and down the first row, "I suppose you all think you're brave coming here to fight in this war? How amusing. When I'm through with you, you'll know the real meaning of bravery, along with pain and suffering! I'll turn you boys into real men!" Lilli gulped audibly and clutched her gun tighter. The Captain looked up at the darkening sky, "I suggest you sleep, your training begins at dawn. Dismissed." With that said he stalked off and entered his tent. All the men let out a sigh and quietly separated. Lilli was shaking all over, what in the world had she gotten herself into?!

Gilbert was less impressed, "Tch, who spit in his rice? Am I right, Mattie?" He looked at the cricket in his hand but the insect made no reply. Patting the back of her neck he advised, "Come on girl, let's find a tent." Lilli hesitantly looked around but she couldn't get the captain out of her head. Despite his harsh nature she already admired him and that scared her even more than his threats. Still, if he managed to turn a girl into a "real man" he would doubtlessly be the greatest captain in the world. Lilli looked down at her self, at her thin limbs and petite frame.

Captain Wang would need all the help he could get.

This was actually challenging! I had to discover a whole different side of China, no "aru"s or pandas for Captain Wang! I'm thinking of making an omake of this and basing it off that hilarious bath scene in Mulan. You're thoughts?

Please review!