Chapter Twelve

Vanessa took a deep, shuddering breath as Carlisle drove down the dark road at an alarming speed.

She felt him glance over at her, then reached out, pulling her hand into his lap.

"If you like, I can treat your father myself," he offered quietly. "I'm not trying to toot my own horn, but I've been practicing medicine for hundreds of years..."

"Yes," Vanessa said quickly, looking over at him. "please, save my dad."

A fresh tear rolled down her cheek.

"I promise you, I will do everything in my power to help him recover," he said in a firm voice, bringing her hand up to his face and kissing the back of her hand.

Vanessa released a shuddering breath. "You're so good to me, Carlisle," she muttered, her heart fluttering hopefully.

"Why wouldn't I be? You're my princess," he smiled over at her, making a small smile erupt on her face, despite her despairing emotions.

The drive to Seattle was mostly quiet. Carlisle didn't bother her, leaving her to her thoughts. Ever once and a while, he would kiss her hand to assure her, or rub his thumb across the top of her hand.

She could barely even think.

A car accident.

Just like her mom.

If her father died that way too, she swore she'd never step foot in a car again.

Unless Carlisle turned me. A voice whispered in her head, making her frown. No, now was not the time for that to even enter her mind.

Her nerves raised as she saw the hospital come into view.

"I'll walk you in, but I'll immediately go back to check on your dad," he said, pulling into a parking place. "don't worry kitten, I'll come right back for you, okay?"

Vanessa nodded shakily, exiting the car with Carlisle.

He grabbed her hand as they walked quickly up to the hospital, him squeezing her hand in assurance as they approached the desk.

"Hi, I'm John Swan's daughter," she said hurriedly to the receptionist. "He was admitted not too long ago, he was in an accident."

"Oh yes," the woman said, typing on her computer. "he is stable, but I'm afraid you'll have to wait until they move him out of ICU to see him sweetheart."

She looked to Carlisle, her expression slightly startled.

"Is this y-your husband?" she asked, gesturing towards Carlisle.

"I'm her boyfriend, and I'm also a licensed MD," Carlisle said quickly, pulling his wallet out of his pocket. "I request to care for John Swan at the permission of his daughter."

She took the cards from Carlisle, typing on the computer.

"Of course, Dr. Cullen," she smiled as she handed him his cards. "he's in the ICU on the 3rd floor. You're free to go up."

"Thank you." he nodded to her, pulling Vanessa aside.

"I'll be right back baby. And don't worry your dad will be fine," he whispered, tilting her chin up and giving her a small kiss on the lips.

"Okay..." she whispered, her heart fluttering as she looked up at him.

He smiled, stroking her cheek lovingly, before letting go, striding quickly and elegantly down the hallway.

She gulped, biting her lip and walking over to the seating area. There were a few people there. An elderly lady, and two questionable members of society.

The two guys were huddling together over a phone, snickering rudely.

She ignored them and sat down, looking in the direction that Carlisle had left.

She didn't doubt Carlisle was probably a better doctor than anyone she'd ever seen, but he wasn't a miracle worker. If her dad was meant to die...no degree of skill could help him, and she knew it.

She crossed and uncrossed her legs, staring at the clock.

Thirty minutes passed, and her heart sped up.

"Miss Swan?"

The lady from the desk was calling out at her. She instantly jumped to her feet, running over to her.

"Is...is my dad okay?" she croaked.

"Yes, sweetheart," she smiled. "they've taken him to a room. He's in room 350. it's on the 2nd floor."

"Thank you!" Vanessa said quickly, running down the hallway and to the elevator, quickly jabbing the buttons multiple times.

It opened, and she darted in, pressing the number two.

She tapped her foot inpateiently as she rode up, the doors finally opening.

She darted into the hallway, looking around.

"335...345...350!" she exclaimed, opening the door quickly and walking in the room.

Her heart thumped in her chest, seeing her dad laying there.

He had a cast on his leg, one of his arm, his head was bandaged, and he had brusies all over his face.

Tears leaked down her face as she rushed up to him.

"Dad...daddy!" she whispered quietly, picking up his spare hand and holding it to her chest.

She gently stroked his blonde hair away from his forehead. She desperately wanted to talk to him, to know if he was okay, but at the same time, she didn't want to wake him.

But, he'd be okay, right?

Where's Carlisle?

No sooner than she thought that, Carlisle walked through the door, holding a clipboard.

"Carlisle!" she ran up to him, throwing her arms around him. Surely, if he'd been human, she would have knocked him down.

"He's...he's going to be okay, right?" she asked, pulling back from his embrace.

He smiled at her, his eyes looking hesitant.

Her heart dropped.

"He...baby, he has some bleeding on his brain," he said quietly, making her heart lurch as she covered her mouth. "If it progresses much further, he'll have to have surgery."

"B-but...it won't, will it?"

He frowned, looking like he was internally killing himself.

"I'd...I'd like to do the surgery now," he said quietly, looking up at her. "He's unresponsive. The other doctor wants to wait, but I've seen this many times. If we do it now, the chances of him having a full recovery increases by at least 30 percent."

"And...if you wait?" she asked, her voice shaking.

"...if the bleeding worsens, he'll have a 50/50 chance of survival," he said quietly, making her gasp. "but, if we do it now, I'd say he has an 80 percent chance of surviving."

She looked over at her dad.

"Do it," she nodded, tears rolling down her face. "do it now."

"You are listed as his emergency contact. As a lawyer, he has it taken care of. He's listed you to decide if he was ever in a situation such as this," he said quietly, walking up to her and putting an arm around her trembling form. "you can authorize me to do it now, or wait for the other doctor to do it later. But please, I know its a lot to ask..." he put the board down, holding her chin. "please allow me to do this. I want to save your father. Please, trust me baby."

Vanessa looked into his eyes. Was she really going to place her fathers life in her boyfriends hands? No, that had nothing to do with it. With his advanced sight and movement, she knew her father would be in better hands with him than some other doctor she didn't even know.

She nodded slowly. "You...you've done this before?" she asked weakly, watching him nod.

"Hundreds of times, sweetheart," he said quietly. "Brain surgery in a serious operation. But, I'm confident I can stop the bleeding. I'll do everything in my power to help him, I swear to you."

"I...I trust you Carlisle," she sniffed quietly.

"Thank you, baby," he said, looking relieved as he gently placed two kisses on each of her cheeks, grabbing the clipboard and handing it to her.

"What's this?" she sniffed, rubbing her nose as she held the pen.

"Permission for me to operate," he said quietly, pointing a long finger to the X at the bottom. "you just sign here."

Her pen hovered over the X, looking back briefly at her father.

We're going to save you, dad. She thought to herself, taking a deep breath and quickly signing, 'Vanessa Celina Swan.'

She sniffed, tears rolling down her cheeks as she handed it back to him. He immediately signed beside her name, putting the clipboard down and pulling her into a tight hug.

She instantly burst into tears.

"I've called Rosalie," he said quietly. "she's coming to give you company. I refuse to leave you alone, sweetheart. The surgery could take up to eight hours, I need to know you're being looked after. Is that alright?"

She nodded against his chest, crying into his shirt.

"Good..." he whispered, kissing the top of her head. "I'll give the order and go prepare for emergency surgery. Nurses should come to get your father within ten minutes, okay?"

He pulled back, looking at her tear streaked face.

"Y-yes...okay," she whispered, rubbing her nose as she sniffled.

She knew she looked gross, but she couldn't be bothered to care.

"Talk to him while I'm gone. Maybe he can hear you," he suggested quietly, running his fingers down her face as he gently pressed his lips into hers.

He pulled away, looking down at her with gentle eyes. He opened his mouth, looking like he wanted to say something, but his eyes flashed, and he closed it.

Her heart raced. "Wha-what were you going to say?" she asked quietly.

"Nothing baby," he smiled, making her heart fall. "I'll do what I can and I'll come to you the moment its over."

She nodded as he squeezed her against him, kissing her head. Before she knew it, he was gone and out the door.

She took a shaky breath, walking over to her dad and grabbing his hand.

"Daddy, Carlisle is going to make you better..." she whispered. "I trust him. I know he'll make you be okay..." she leaned down and kissed his forehead.

"I love you so much," she cried, wiping her eyes. "you have to pull through...if you don't, I'll be alone...please, you have to survive for me, okay? I won't let you go – I can't," she sniffed, clutching his hand.

"I need you," she whispered, feeling like a five year old again. When it came to your parents, she was sure it didn't matter if you were five or fifty, it still affected you the same. She was already a blubbering mess.

She sat there for a while, telling him repeatedly that she loved him until nurses came in the room.

"We're ready for the surgery," one older nurse said, putting her hand on her trembling shoulder. "Don't worry, your father is in good hands."

"I know..." she whispered, leaning down and giving him one last kiss on his forehead. "I love you, daddy."

She watched, sobbing into her hand as her dad was rolled out of the room. She collpsed in a chair, tucking her face in her knees and crying her heart out.

She had no idea how long she sat there like that, but it must have been a long time, because she jumped violently when she felt a tentative hand on her shoulder.

She gasped, looking up to see the golden eyes of a concerned Rosalie.

"Oh Rose..." she cried, throwing her arms around the perfect blonde girl, crying into her designer shirt.

"Shh, it'll be alright," she whispered soothingly, running her hand up and down her back. "I'm positive that Carlisle is the best surgeon in the world. He'll save him."

"I hope so..." she murmured, pulling back and wiping her eyes, seeing a wet spot on her pink shirt.

"I'm sorry!" she cried, feeling guilty.

"No, no!" Rose hushed, putting her hands out. "I couldn't care less about this shirt."

"Are you sure?" she asked, falling weakly back into her chair.

"Oh, absolutely," she smiled, sitting in the chair next to her.

Vanessa sighed, looking at the clock.

It was already midnight. She was in for a long night...

"My life is so fucked up," Vanessa said quietly, closing her eyes and sighing.

Her mom died in a car accident, her dad was seriously injured, and now her vampire boyfriend – who was a doctor – was trying to save him.

"Everyone's life is fucked up, Vanessa," Rosalie chuckled, stroking her hair. "things happen. You can't have any control over it. I truly believe your dad will be okay. I have that much faith in Carlisle. Although, its your dad. I understand how you must feel."

"What about your dad Rosalie?" Vanessa asked, looking at her.

Her faced pulled a look of pain.

"I...they thought I died," she said bitterly. "But, I suppose I did, didn't I?"

"You never saw them after you were changed?" she whispered, feeling bad for the model like girl.

"I did, but they didn't know it..." she smiled, looking sad. "I would go watch them sometimes, just to see if they were alright...I did it a lot. Then, one day my mom died at the age of 70-" she frowned. "I watched my father then morn himself to death, unable to help. He died a month later. I don't think he could live without her."

"I'm so sorry, Rosalie," Vanessa whispered, looking at the sad girl.

"It's been over since the sixties," she said, giving a small smile. "It still makes me sad sometimes. Sometimes I wonder if they now know what really became of me...if they're up in heaven, disappointed to see what really became of their only daughter."

"Why would they feel that way?" Vanessa asked, confused.

"I will never be reunited with them," she said sadly. "they would know that their daughter died...but instead of going into death, she became an immortal monster."

"But, you aren't a monster!" Vanessa said quickly. "Carlisle said you've never fed from a human. You're just-"

"It doesn't mean I haven't killed," Rosalie interjected, her fists clenching and making Vanessa look at her, startled.

"Wha-what do you mean?" Vanessa asked, confused.

"..."

"You don't have to talk about it," Vanessa said quickly.

"No," Rosalie said, having a resolved face. "I was engaged to a man...a man I thought I loved. His name was Royce," she said bitterly. "one night, his four friends and him were drunk...they all raped me, nearly beating me to death. They left me to die in the street."

Vanessa gasped, horrified as she put her hand to her mouth.

"Oh my God, Rose-"

"I killed them one by one, saving my fiancee for last," she interjected. "I'd do it again, too. I wanted my humanity—I wanted a family. Those bastards took it from me. Carlisle smelt my blood from far away. He came to me, biting me. He'd originally changed me for Edward, thinking perhaps we could be mates. But, we never liked each other that way. I hated him for it."

Vanessa frowned. Carlisle just didn't want her to die...

"He saw what they did, not wanting me to die," she whispered. "Carlisle is my father. But, when I brought him Emmett and asked him to change him for me, he didn't hesitate. He did it for me, and when he did, I forgave him – I respected him."

Vanessa smiled, her heart feeling tight in her chest.

"I love him," Rosalie smiled. "And although I wish it wasn't with a human, I'm glad he found you. He's always made sure we had someone to love, and although we love him, its not the same. I'm just glad he could find happiness in you."

Vanessa smiled. Yes, her being human was a little inconvenient she supposed.

"What...what if a vampire falls in love with a human, and that human remains that way?" she asked tentatively.

"The love would never end. Even when they became elderly," Rosalie smiled bitterly, but suddenly frowned. "But, when their mate died...they'd have no reason for existing any longer. They'd probably find a way to destroy themselves, with the small hope that perhaps they could be reunited in heaven. At least, that's what Carlisle would do."

Vanessa's eyes widened. If she really was Carlisle's mate, and she remained human...her death would kill Carlisle?

"Don't worry about that now," Rose whispered, touching her hair. "you have plenty of time to think that over."

"Right." Vanessa said, shaking her head. Her dad was the only thing that mattered right now.

Vanessa fell silent, thinking about what Rosalie had said. Those men, she killed them. Vanessa agreed, they deserved to die but...to do it yourself? Then again, she supposed Rosalie was a newly enraged vampire. Perhaps she couldn't help it? Not that she was making excuses.

She sighed, putting her head on her knees. Her thoughts were troubled as exhaustion from so much crying took over her. She wasn't sure when she fell asleep, but was grateful for the peaceful darkness it offered.

"Baby..."

Vanessa felt her head being stoked.

"Sweetheart, wake up."

Vanessa lifted her head, cringing at her sore neck as her eyes fluttered, seeing Carlisle smiling down at her.

Her heart starting beating fast.

"My dad..." she gasped, grabbing his arm with wide eyes.

"He's going to be just fine," Carlisle smiled at her, his eyes sparkling. "I just finished the surgery, and he'll be brought in here after he leaves recovery. I stopped the bleeding, and everything went completely smoothly."

Tears started rolling down her face. She noticed Carlisle was wearing scrubs and one of those surgeon hats, but she didn't care. She immediately launched herself in his arms, crying in relief.

"Thank you...thank you...thank you..." she kept repeating in between sobs, crying in his shoulder as he wrapped his arms around her.

"I'm so happy," Carlisle murmured, kissing the side of her head as he held her.

"I lo..." she stopped, her eyes widening.

What?

Did...did she almost say I love you to him?

"I – I...uh, I-"

He tensed as he held her, and she was sure he wasn't even breathing.

Oh God...damage control, damage control!

"I love my dad! I'm so happy that he's going to be alright..." she said quickly, hoping he didn't know. It was a pretty good cover up for her blunder. God, if she'd just blurted that...she would have died. But, did she love Carlisle? Yes, she loved him for saving her father...but was she IN love with him?

Her heart fluttered in response.

"As am I," he whispered, kissing her head again as he pulled away.

She couldn't help it when her face turned bright red.

Dammit.

"I'm going to go change. I'll be right back," he murmered, stroking her cheek and giving her a gentle peck on her lips. Her heart jumped madly in her chest as he pulled away, smiling as he walked out the door.

She sighed, looking at the clock to see it was nine a.m. Her eyes widened. Jesus, she'd slept all night? No wonder her neck and back were killing her!

She stretched, yawning as Rosalie walked in the door.

She smiled at her, seeing she was holding a large Starbucks coffee and an egg Mcmuffin.

"You goddess!" Vanessa smiled, taking he items from her and sucking on the coffee.

"I got you a caramel latte," she smiled, laughing lightly. "I hope that's alright."

"Mmm, so good."

"I'll take that as a yes then," Rosalie chuckled, making Vanessa smile.

"Well, now that I know your dads gonna be okay and Carlisle is here with you...I guess I'll give you guys some alone time," Rosalie smiled.

"Oh okay. Thank you so much for staying all night with me," Vanessa said warmly, giving her a hug.

"Of course, anytime. Let me know if you need anything and I'll text you," she smiled, waving at her as she walked out the door.

Vanessa waved back, her stomach growling as she flopped in the chair, opening the muffin and shoving it in her mouth. She didn't realize how hungry she really was.

She heard a chuckle and her eyes widened as they whipped up, seeing Carlisle standing there in his dress clothes again.

Her cheeks were puffed out like a chipmunk as she stared at him. She quickly swallowed, her cheeks turning red as he'd saw her pig out.

"Hungry darling?" he asked, smiling cheekily at her as he sat in the chair Rose had previously occupied.

"Only a lot," she smirked, looking down and taking another bite of her muffin. This time, though, it was much smaller.

"I started to ask if you're tired, but I guess you don't get tired, huh?" she asked, looking back over at him as he stretched his arm across the back of her chair.

"Not at all," he smiled. "I only get hungry. But, I've been feeding everyday before I go see you, so its not a problem."

She raised her eyebrows. "You have to kill an animal everyday?"

"No, usually its only about once a week," he leaned towards her, placing at small kiss against her neck as he inhaled her scent, making her knees feel weak. "but, you smell so lovely that I take unnesscary precautions to ensure your safety."

"Oh." she said dumbly, trembling lightly as she took another sip of her drink, finishing off her breakfast.

"Does that make you uncomfortable?" he asked quietly, pulling back from her and looking concerned.

"No...I mean, if I picture you killing Bambi I get a little uncomfortable," he chuckled. "but...I guess its not too much different than people eating meat. Then again, I don't want to see someone slit a pigs throat to put the bacon on my burger...I just wanna enjoy my sandwhich. I was a vegitartian for about a month, actually." she smiled at him.

"What happened?" he asked, raising an eyebrow.

"I got hungry."

"..."

He burst into laughter, her heart skipping at the melodious sound as her eyes drank in his handsome face.

"Hmm, well. We call ourselves vegitarians," he smiled, winking at her. "It's sort of a joke."

"Don't you ever get tempted?" she asked, tilting her head.

"No, absolutely not," he said firmly. "I know who I want to be. I never thought about doing it the easy way."

"There's a time in all of our lives when we must choose between what is right, and what is easy," she quoted, smiling as she took a sip.

"That's very profound," he mused, raising his eyebrows. "I do not recall where that's from?"

"Harry Potter," she answered lamely, giving him a sheepish smile.

"Well, I like that," he chuckled. "And its very true."

Vanessa thought for moments. "Will be dad be awake?" she asked, looking concerned.

"Yes, they'll bring him from recovery once he regains conciousness," he smiled, stroking her hair.

"Carlisle..." she said quietly, looking away as emotions threatened to over take her. "I...I don't know how I could ever thank you. You saved me dad and I just-"

"Shhh," he said, wrapping his fingers around her chin, turning her face to look at him.

"There's nothing I wouldn't do for you," he said quietly, yet seriously.

Her face burst into flames as her heart raced against her will.

"O-oh...r-really?" she asked dumbly, wanting to smack herself on the forehead at her idiocy.

"Yes," he whispered firmly, looking down at her lips. His eyes closed and hers fluttered closed, sighing internally when she felt his cold lips brush against hers softly before he pulled back.

"In fact, my children are already teasing me, saying I'm whipped," he chuckled, trying to lower her embarrassment and lighten the mood.

"Why would they do that?" she asked, feeling a little awkward. Did they think...they were already sleeping together.

"Well, when I am home, I spend the entire time staring at my phone," he chuckled. "I come home, get clothes and take off again. Emmett called me lame for staying gone just to be with someone while they slept."

Vanessa suddenly felt guilty. She'd been keeping him away from his family...

"Y-you can stay h-home more if they m-miss you-"

"No, baby. Don't take it that way," he said reassuringly. "they know exactly what I'm going through. To be honest, I think they're thrilled I'm not there much. They'll all looked at me alone for the past hundred years so much, they've had enough of it. Plus, they can be as loud as they want without me barking at them to stop." he chuckled, his eyes flashing humorously.

"Oh...well, when you put it that way," she smiled.

His eyes suddenly darted away, pulling back from her and standing.

"Wha-"

The door opened. She leapt to her feet, seeing them roll her dad in.

"Dad!" she gasped, seeing him smiling at her weakly with bandages on his head.

"Hey honey," her dad said as they stopped his bed. She immediately ran over, hugging him on his bed.

He chuckled, holding her with one arm.

"Are you okay?" she gasped, a few tears of joy falling down her cheeks.

"I've been better," he said bitterly as she pulled back, wiping her cheeks. "but, I'll live..." his gaze trailed behind her, his blue eyes flashing in surprise.

"Dr. Cullen?" he asked, blinking in confusion.

"Hello, Mr. Swan," Carlisle smiled charmingly, walking around his bed. "I performed your surgery. How are you feeling?"

"I'm alright," he said, blinking and still looking confused. "D-did they call you in here?"

"No sir," he chuckled. "I came of my own violation."

"He saved your life daddy," Vanessa smiled, looking up at Carlisle fondly.

"You did?" her dad asked, looking at him in a new light.

"Vanessa is being generous. I'm simply a doctor, performing the surgery I believed needed to be done. Luckily, I was right," he smiled, looking up at her.

"Well, damn..." her dad blinked. "Thank you...thank you so much." her dad said kindly, raising one hand up to Carlisle.

Carlisle smiled, firmly grabbing his hand and shaking it.

"Of course," he said, nodding as he looked back up at Vanessa, who was staring at him.

"..."

Her dad was looking back and forth from them, looking curious.

Vanessa immediately tore her gaze away, smiling at her dad.

"Are you two...?" he asked, pointed back and forth from her to Carlisle.

"Daddy, you just had surgery," Vanessa said in a disapproving voice. "don't worry about me. You need to rest."

"I'd worry about you if I was in a coma," her dad pointed out, cutting her off. "I'm fine. I asked a question."

Vanessa looked at Carlisle. He nodded at her, turning to her dad and speaking.

"Yes, sir. I was going to ask you if I had permission to see your daughter. However, this happened," he smiled ruefully. "I am very fond of Vanessa – well, I suppose I should say I'm quite crazy about her. I'd like to see her on a regular basis, with your permission."

Her dad blinked. "How old are you?"

"Dad!" Vanessa gasped.

Carlisle chuckled. "It's alright. I'm twenty-three, sir."

"And a brain surgeon?"

"Yes, sir."

"..."

"And...you're romantically interested in Vanessa?" he asked, looking over at her and looking a little confused.

"Yes sir. Very much so," Carlisle smiled, tucking his hands in his pockets.

He looked over Carlisle, making Vanessa slightly worry. Perhaps she was wrong, maybe he wouldn't approve.

Her dad sighed.

"How could I not approve?" he asked, moving in bed. "you seem like a successful, bright young man."

"Thank you, sir," Carlisle smiled, looking up at Vanessa.

"Don't let these casts fool you though, if you hurt her-"

"Dad!" Vanessa hissed. "he just saved your life, don't you think you should save threats for later?"

"It's never too soon to protect my daughter," he pointed out, giving her his dad stare and making her shut up, feeling like a twelve year old again.

Carlisle merely chuckled. "I understand completely. Vanessa is a wonderful young woman. Of course you would be protective of her."

Her dad looked at Carlisle for moment, then offered him a smile.

Vanessa let out a sigh of relief. It was definitely official now.

"Well, I should go home and get some sleep," Carlisle smiled. "I'm sure the two of you have much to discuss, so I'll give you some privacy. I will be back later on this afternoon."

Vanessa smiled. Carlisle was so considerate...

"Hit the nurses button if you begin to feel any pain," Carlisle instructed her dad. "I'm on call here. But, everything should be fine. It's mostly just healing from here on out."

"How long do I have to stay here?" her dad asked.

"I'm not quite sure," Carlisle mused, smiling. "but expect it to be at least a week."

Her dad groaned, making Carlisle chuckle.

"Very well, I'm off. I'll return later," he said, backing towards the door. The second her dad wasn't looking, he gave her a wink, before leaving out the door.

She let out a sigh.

"How long have you been seeing him?" her dad asked, and she knew Carlisle had to be about two feet down the hallway.

"Um – about a week," she said, pulling her chair beside his bed. "But we were friends for weeks before that."

"And that's the type of man you like? A respectable doctor?" he asked, tilting his head. "I always thought you liked hoodlum men. You know, guitar banging, motorcycle riding types that go no where in life."

"No dad," Vanessa rolled her eyes. "I really like Carlisle."

"..."

"Are you in love with him?" he asked quietly, making shock cross her face.

"What – dad!"

"Well, are you?" he asked, giving her a small smile. "It's just the look in your eyes-"

"Dad, I care deeply for Carlisle. But, it's a little uncomfortable with you asking me that."

"Alright, alright," he said, putting his hands up in defense.

"Get some rest," Vanessa said, rubbing his hand. "I'll be right here. I love you."

"I love you too honey," he smiled, closing his eyes.

Vanessa sat there, looking at her dad's face for a while. Her thoughts were torn. First, she almost says she loves Carlisle, and then her dad asked, saying he noticed something?

The pounding in her chest told her just about everything she needed to know.

I'm in love with Carlisle. She thought, her chest filling with emotion at the mere thought. It was like something had been taken off her shoulders. She'd been so afraid of loving him, but now that she did, it was like the worst part was over.

She was in love with Carlisle.

Already.

How could she not? He was amazing. Kind, compassionate, beautiful, smart, funny...sophisticated...not to mention, he just saved her fathers life. How could she not be over the moon for him? Everything he did drawled her into him.

Her chest swelled with emotion as she wondered if he was in love with her. Her heart said he was, but she wondered...how could he love her? Her mind couldn't wrap around that. But, everything he'd done for her...if that wasn't love, she didn't know what was. He really did treat her like a princess.

No wonder she was in love with the man.

He was perfect.

Yeah, okay...vampire. But still, he was amazing.

She was in love with him, and she was sure, that love would only grow. Already, she couldn't imagine being without him. Her chest ached at the mere thought of it. If she wanted to be with Carlisle, she had to become an immortal.

She looked at her dads sleeping face, remembering what Rosalie had said. She wasn't sure if she believed in an afterlife or not, but if there was one...she'd never be reunited with her father – or her mother. At least, not for God only knew how many years. Possibly hundreds of thousands...she'd have to watch her father die eventually, just like Rosalie did.

Granted, most people do see their parents die at some point, but this was just different. Knowing you'd join them in death one day made more of a difference than the average person would think – but she doubted they thought about it. After all, death was a given.

Except for the Cullens.

She'd have to let go of everyone, save for maybe Bella. Her father...her friends...almost everyone she'd ever loved. They'd all die, and she'd just be here for forever, watching death as she remained unchanging.

That would be hard. How could she choose that? Then again, perhaps nothing happened after death. Just...quiet blackness. If that was the case, she'd only be joining them in that, never seeing them again regardless. But then, she wouldn't have to live for an eternity with the pain of their deaths.

How could Bella just so willingly let go of Charlie? She knew that if she decided to be a vampire, Carlisle would change her. But even so, what if she lost control? What if she killed somebody? She wasn't sure if she could live with that kind of guilt...

There was so much to consider.

But, one thing was for sure: she was in love with Carlisle and now...she had to consider spending an eternity with him to at least some degree.