Hello my lovely readers!
Thank you all for your wonderful reviews. If you are a guest or have blocked private messaging, I can't reply you though. Somebody asked me, if I misspelled "willfully" - I checked two other dictionaries than the one I usually use and all of them spelled it "wilfully", just like I have it. Maybe it's a difference between UKxUS spelling? I try to write in British English.
A huuuuge thank you to Jen for her patience with me ;)
We get to see Lizzy's thoughts today.
"Oh Lizzy, you are too cruel!" Jane giggled.
"I am cruel? Jane, how could you say something like this about me?" Lizzy was bouncing on Jane's bed, pretending to be offended.
"Yes, laughing at our poor hosts is cruel." Jane countered.
"How can I stop when they are so gullible?" Elizabeth shook her head. "Mrs Robbins pretended to know everything and persisted on interrupting my discussion with Mr Darcy. Poor man, she simply would not let him breathe."
"Lizzy!" Jane reprimanded her. "Caroline has been very kind to me."
"To you maybe." Elizabeth smirked. "You are a gentle soul, determined to think the best about everyone. She cannot stand me. " Then she added mischievously. "Not that I mind."
"Well," Jane shook her head, unable to find a reason to disagree with her sister. "You are a bit sharp with her."
"Call it by its real name, impertinence, as it is. However, I think her irritation has to do more with the fact that I monopolized Mr Darcy's attention." Lizzy was very amused. "What does she even think, flirting with him in front of her husband eyes?"
"Lizzy, your ideas are so far-fetched. I told you not to read too much into people's behaviour." Jane scolded her, even though she inwardly agreed.
"But Jane, surely even you have to see how this woman is hounding poor Mr Darcy, with all of her accidental touches and displays of cleavage." Lizzy made a disgusted grimace.
"No, you cannot go accusing poor Mrs Robbins of sinful intentions based on your observation, Lizzy." Jane knew that Elizabeth was probably right. Nobody could be so elegant and completely balanced one minute and then suddenly extraordinarily clumsy in the presence of Mr Darcy. Mrs Robbins collided with him almost every time. Still, Jane was willing to give her benefit of doubt.
"Jane, Jane, Jane." Elizabeth took up her lecturing pose. "As our dear mother taught us, what is the best way to attract a man?" She lifted her eyebrow inquiringly.
Jane blushed and looked down.
"You do not know?" Elizabeth could imitate Mrs Bennet's screeching to perfection. "Oh my poor nerves! What will become of us? Even my kind Jane, my most grateful daughter, does not remember my teachings?"
"Stop, stop it Lizzy." Jane was biting her lips, unsuccessfully trying not to laugh.
Elizabeth, however, was on a roll and nothing could stop her from delivering her amusing performance. She shook her finger at Jane in stern manner, still mimicking her mother. "You have to display your figures to your best advantage. Lower the neckline Lizzy! You are wearing it unnecessary high like some governess. Men need to appreciate your attributes for childbearing."
By then, Jane had to stick her head under the pillow to muffle her amusement. Lizzy sounds exactly like Mama.
"So, you see," Elizabeth continued unperturbed, "there is only one reason why a woman would apply this kind of behaviour – to attract a prey."
Jane let out another peel of laughter.
"I apologize," Elizabeth mockingly said, "I meant to say to attract a man."
Jane wiped tears from her eyes. "Lizzy, you are incorrigible."
Elizabeth lifted her index finger to indicate that she was not done yet. "And as we know that Mrs Robbins is already a married woman, it leaves us with only two options. Though I think it rather unlikely, Mrs Robbins is looking for her future husband, should the General die soon. Or she wants..." Lizzy lowered her voice, "a lover."
"Lizzy." Jane threw a pillow at her. "A lady should not talk about these things."
"I only describe what I see, Jane." Elizabeth threw the pillow back and started laughing when she caught Jane unaware.
This little exchange quickly escalated in a proper sisterly pillow fight where nothing more was said on the matter that day.
Elizabeth hugged the book closer to her chest and ducked out of the front door quickly. Her original plan on hiding in the library was ruined when she heard Mrs Robins and Miss Bingley cackling inside. Probably gossiping about me again, she thought.
She needed a quiet space to continue reading her treasure. Finding the thin volume completely by chance the day before, she tried to reach for The Midwives Book* on the top shelf which was hidden behind The Book of Herbal Remedies. Tugging harder, the books fell down on her. In addition to The Midwives Book and The Book of Herbal Remedies, there was one little book labelled simply Love.
A quick inspection of the book showed that it was a collection of love poems. Normally, Elizabeth would just put it back and forget about it, but something made her to take this book, too.
It intrigued her, and reading the text gave her goose bumps. Her father did not have many poets in his library, his opinion on "flowery nonsense" was set in stone. Any other day, Elizabeth would agree completely with him, but there was something in this collection that called to her.
She passed the rose garden and hastened towards the old willow on the far side of a little pond at the end of the Netherfield's grounds. It was Mrs Fraser's favourite place to read and Elizabeth quickly came to understand why. This place was quite hidden from the world and because Mrs Fraser loved her rose garden, her gardener spent most of his time there, leaving the pond and its surroundings to grow wild.
When Elizabeth reached the old tree, she cautiously looked around. Once she was sure there was no one near, she tucked the book in her pocket, raised her skirts in one hand and quickly climbed on the biggest and most comfortable branch. Smiling contently, she was safe in her heaven, left to reading and daydreaming. Elizabeth chuckled. If only the superior sisters saw her now. They would have a fit and then loudly complain to Mr Darcy.
Ah, Mr Darcy. Elizabeth's mind quickly went to him, as it was her wont in the last few days. She still could not quite make him out. He looked so serious and sad when she first spotted him at the assembly, as if he wore the world weight on his shoulders.
At that time, he found her only tolerable and announced that she did not tempt him. Tempt him. He certainly did tempt her. Elizabeth blushed at these thoughts and tried to dispel her improper thoughts by mulling about his insult.
Why did he use such strange wording? Why did he just not say that he did not like her? Why did he have to bring the words of desire into the conversation? Elizabeth knew she was pretty. Although she was not vain, she was aware of her appearance and of the attention it garnered. So why did this great man not find her tempting? Unless... No, it was too farfetched, she should not judge a person based on their one little meaningless comment.
Elizabeth opened the book, intent on getting rid of her unpleasant thoughts. However, her mind would not cooperate.
Remembering Mr Elliot, her Uncles Phillip's clerk, she prided herself in recognizing him as one of the unspeakable, two years before he and his lover were discovered and had to flee some place where they would not be recognized. It was even possible that they left England completely. She mourned his loss, because he was one of few men who treated her with respect and without the usual empty flattery.
About one year into their acquaintance, she noticed that while he looked at her and other women with great respect and that his eyes never strayed from their faces, the same could not be said for his male friends. The look of desire was never turned towards any woman.
Mr Elliot also had many female friends, and no one could discuss lace with her Mamma as he did. His clothes were always fashionable, he paid unusual care to his appearance, sometimes she laughed that he primped more than Lydia.**
Elizabeth shook her head, returning her thoughts back to the mysterious Mr Darcy. She decided not to dwell on his words about temptation, he was probably only in a foul mood and did not think what he was saying.
She smiled when she remembered their walk the first day she came to Netherfield.
Three days ago
The invitation from Netherfield came too late in the day for Elizabeth to manage to pack all of her clothes and still arrive at a polite hour, so she decided to send her luggage the next day in the carriage along with Molly, her and Jane's maid. Then she started across fields to Netherfield, carefully avoiding any mud so she would not give any more reasons for the superior sisters to dislike her. They liked Jane and Elizabeth did not want to interrupt her sister's time with her new friends, even if she did not approve of them.
While crossing the border between the two estates, she encountered Mr Darcy on his morning ride. She was pleasantly surprised, as she did not expect him to be out. It seemed that he was an early riser, just like her. Another thing we have in common, she thought.
She curtsied prettily. "Good morning, Mr Darcy."
"Oh, Miss Elizabeth." He looked surprised to see her, as he was lost in his thoughts and did not notice her at first. He quickly dismounted his horse, unable to avoid missing the large puddle of mud until it was too late. There he landed with a splash. Elizabeth bit her lip to prevent her laughter but was not completely successful.
"I-I apologize, Miss Elizabeth." Mr Darcy stammered. He looked completely contrite, afraid that he offended her with his careless behaviour, the perfect picture of a young boy about to be scolded.
Elizabeth could not take it anymore and laughed. "Do not apologize, Mr Darcy, it is not your fault that your stallion decided to stop by the only puddle in the whole field."
Darcy blushed but looked relieved that she saw humour in the situation. He smiled. "You are too kind Miss Elizabeth. Allow me then apologize for Hermes and his unfortunate landing skills."
Elizabeth petted the horse's nose. "Oh, the god's messenger, you are forgiven."
Hermes whinnied like he was agreeing with her. She tentatively took a step closer and patted his head. The horse shook his head and tried to nuzzle her face.
Darcy quickly pulled the reins, keeping Hermes in place. "Oh, he likes you." He smiled at her. "Were you heading to Netherfield? Allow us to escort you." He offered her his arm which she gladly took.
They both found the remaining mile to the Netherfield to be over quite quickly. As they talked about repairs to the tenant's cottages which were overseen by Mr Darcy, Elizabeth was impressed with his will to help, even though it was not his responsibility. Darcy, on the other hand, was pleasantly surprised by how much Elizabeth knew about estate business. Their friendship started growing.
Elizabeth put aside her pleasant thoughts and opened the book on the page she previously marked with a ribbon. Reading this particular poem caused her to feel something curious. When Elizabeth pictured Mr Darcy, her stomach felt as though it were filled with butterflies. Is this desire?
Pleasure, measure, love's delight,
Haste then, sweet love, our wished flight.***
As she finished the poem, Elizabeth heard hooves in the distance. She looked up from her book, carefully peering between branches, and observed Mr Darcy dismount. Leading Hermes to the pond, he encouraged the horse to drink and then he himself wetted his handkerchief to cool his brow from the vigorous ride.
Elizabeth felt the tingling in her stomach return. She parted her lips and unconsciously leaned forward. Her book forgotten, it slipped from her grip. Quickly trying to catch it, she lost her balance and followed the book to the ground.
* The Midwives Book: Or the whole Art of Midwifry Discovered by Jane Sharp, 1671
** I know it's a cliché description of gay man but I need Elizabeth to have this portrayal for the later use in the story (and one of my acquaintances is exactly the same)
*** Anonymous: To His Love
Thank you for reading, please review.
I have caught up with updating to DLC where I originally started posting - so from now, I will update every other Saturday. See you in two weeks ;) Darcy is going to show his perspective. ;)