Long time, no see, huh? Well, I finally got around to finishing this chapter. Not much to say, so enjoy!
Trigger warning: mentions of homophobia, abuse, blood, trying to cure homosexuality, and vomiting.
Skin sliding against skin, too-hot breath against the pounding pulse of a pale neck. Fingers intertwine, bodies press together, eyes lock. Panting, heaving, gripping. Toes curl and lips part in a scream that's only loud in her head. Abandon thought, abandon emotion, abandon senses. Only ecstasy. Only ever just that.
Never that.
"Elsa!"
Scarlet. Crimson. Red.
While part of Elsa is analyzing and taking in information (the part that's also busy being a thesaurus), the other part is screaming at her for being so useless. So stupid. So fucked up. Or maybe that's just her dad. He never lies.
"What did I tell you? How dare you disrespect me like this?"
The massive amount of information claiming at her from all sides seems to go through a scrambler and the way into her brain. Random bits of the argument between her mother and the principal. The whimpers from an unidentified source (was it her?). The blood on her hands.
Inconvenient. She needed to find a place to wash it off, or else she wouldn't be able to do anything with her hands.
(Like they haven't done enough already.)
"C'mon, Elsa!"
In another life, they could have been happy. Though, Anna was happy in any life Elsa could come up with, because it hurt too much to see her in pain.
So maybe it's better to say that in another life, Elsa would have been happy.
Some place, some time where Anna didn't keep getting hurt, where the Kaiju never found a way into this world, where Elsa was normal.
The one thing she'd never be.
"Elsa!"
Darkness. Emptiness. Nothingness.
"What's the problem? Why do we need to take her out of the program?" the thunder of her father rumbled, permeating the walls into the room Elsa was lodging in. Once upon a time, the blonde would have cowered at the sound, but now she couldn't even manage a flinch.
Nothing.
"Upon further mental inspection, we've discovered that you daughter has several severe mental diseases. To keep her in the program could possibly be the literal death of her!" the doctor's normally collected voice rose in a rare moment of impassioned pleading.
"After what? I told you at the beginning of this thing that I didn't want you poking around in her head! My daughter is completely normal and you needed to keep her that way! She's obviously like that because of you!" Ah yes, her father's normal technique of pushing off blame onto others. Maybe he needed the head doctor.
"And I told you that mental evaluation might very well be unavoidable! You can't ask us to try to remove your daughter's latent homosexuality and not expect us to 'poke around in her head'!" the doctor argued back.
"I am not paying you to try, I am paying you to succeed!"
Loud footsteps. A slamming door.
Elsa knew it was all her fault.
"Elsa! Please!"
"Alright girls, we're gonna take this nice and easy. Remember not to chase any RABITs," Olaf's voice sounded through the intercom.
"Drift successful!" were the last words Elsa heard before she was sucked into the link.
She tensed, waiting for the inevitable.
"Wake up Elsa!"
"How dare you? She's your sister, Elsa! I knew there was something wrong with you, I just knew it!" her father's voice roared. Ah yes, of course this was it, the nightmare that kept plaguing her, that memory from long ago. But something was different, this time.
"I-I'm sorry, daddy! I didn't mean to!" the blonde heard herself say. Only, it wasn't her. She was listening through a door, instead of facing her father. This was Anna's memory!
Elsa jerked up, smacking her head into something solid.
"Ah, fuck!" a familiar voice cursed.
"Anna, watch your language," Elsa grumbled on instinct, rubbing her forehead. Her eyes sprang open in realization, and she scrambled away from her sister until her back hit a railing.
"Elsa, it's okay," Anna soothed, reaching out to the older girl.
"No! Stay away!"
"Elsa, don't chase the RABIT!" Anna yelled, pulling Elsa from a dangerous path.
Anna. She knew. She'd known all along. Shit, shit, shitfucking shit.
And suddenly, Elsa realized.
"Shut this fucker down!" one of the analysts yelled, prompting a quick eject from the Drift.
Elsa unstrapped as quickly as possible, exiting the Jäger and running out onto the catwalk. Her lunch made a quicker exit than she had. Suddenly, it was black.
"Elsa!"