So. I am the stupidest person alive.
You all may be asking, "Oh Renee, why do you think that?" Some of you may even be the nice comforting types who say "Oh Renee, there are no stupid decisions, only learning moments." More of you are probably realist who are thinking "You dumbass, what did you do? Hurry up and tell me so I can get on with the story."
You all know how I'm always saying, "Oh my goodness I'm so busy, I don't have time for anything, Oh my goodness what am I doing with my life wha wha wha whine whine whine" stuff? Well, I'm considering graduate school. Yes. I want to go get my Masters Degree. Because obviously I have too much free time and I should fill it with MORE SCHOOL. My English Professor told me I have the talent and the dedication to thrive in the program. I'm actually considering this. I can't believe I'm considering this.
I could have a Masters before I turn 24. Please excuse the moment I'm about to have.
AAAAAAAGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHH! MASTERS! WHAT AM I DOING?
Also-
Guess what guys! Guess what? My short story was submitted for the AWP contest from my University. This is a huge nationwide contest and I'm the only submission from my University. Wish me luck! There's absolutely no way I'll win, but still, it's amazingly wonderful that I was even selected to to be entered. I feel special. :)
OH OH OH OH!
Doctor Who. Just. Doctor Who. This is a Spoiler Free Zone. But to everyone who did see it.
OH MY GOSH!
Doctor Freaking Who!
I cried. There were tears.
And then I had to explain to my boyfriend that girls cry when they're sad/angry/happy/that was funny/wow he's a pretty man/oh look at the baby/KITTY!
Apparently tears are the main reason men don't understand women. I now know we have all this power in our tear ducts just waiting to be unleashed.
The power! MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
Okay. I'm better now. Um….Chapter…5? Sure. Let's say 5. I like the number 5. 5 it is. Don't tell me if it's not 5. Let me have this moment.
Enjoy, please review!
~Renee
"So you don't think he's Navy at all?"
Tony nodded and gestured with his fork. A piece of lettuce dangled from the end and Tobias felt his lips twitch at the bit of dressing that dripped from the end. He had demanded that they grab something to eat before checking out the scene and no they would not be eating in his car. He had been surprised to see the young man order a salad and soup and then thought back to the cough and the hoarseness he could hear in his voice and approved of his choice.
"The more I look at it, the more I believe we have a case of mistaken identity. Or not so mistaken. Someone purposely dressed him in Navy blues and I'm stuck figuring who and why. Not to mention who the hell the kid is to begin with. I hate that the most."
Tony looked down at his plate and trailed off into silence. Tobias nodded in commiseration. He understood. There was nothing worse than waiting and somewhere was a family wondering where their son, their brother, their husband was and until they discovered who he was, the family would continue to wait in desperation.
"You'll get it Tony. Something will come of it."
Tony sipped his soup and closed his eyes at the warmth. "I know. I'm just not very patient."
Fornell laughed. "Are any of us?"
Tony opened his mouth to speak but was cut off by a light voice calling across the patio of the restaurant.
"Tony?!"
Tobias watched as his face changed. Delight then fear as he glanced over at Tobias. He raised a hand to wave and leaned over, his face wide with a smile but Fornell could see the strain around his eyes.
"Professor DiNardo. I'm Professor DiNardo and I've mentioned her before. No FBI."
A woman with dark hair flung herself into Tony at the exact moment he stood, his arms open for an embrace.
"Jeanne! What are you doing here?" He asked smiling, all earlier signs of stress wiped away. Tobias marveled at the change. For a moment there was no sickness, no pain, no worry. He glowed. He was tan and bright and rich in the sunlight.
The woman kissed his cheek and brushed some of his hair out of his face, momentary distracting Tobias. Tony's hair was growing quite long. Had he always let it go that far? She pointed at the shop next door and Tobias noted it was a delivery shop.
"I had to pick something up for dad. He's coming into town this weekend."
Something flickered across Tony's face too fast for Tobias to catch but his smile widened. "Really? That's great."
She bumped her hip against his side and winked. "Yup. He's very eager to meet you."
Tony laughed. "And me him." he gestured to Tobias who stood. "Have I introduced my friend? Doctor Jeanne Beniot this is Thomas Bennet, a friend from another university. He teaches at Pittsburgh." He dipped his head close to hers and stage whispered. "History teacher. Talk slow."
Jeanne snorted and shoved Tony gently, "Be polite." She scolded before she smiled at him and offered her hand. "Nice to meet you Professor Bennet."
Tobias shook her hand carefully. "Please call me Thomas. It's wonderful to meet you as well, Tony never shuts up about you."
She blushed and dipped her head. "Good things I hope."
Tony grabbed her waist and spun her away. "Only dirty secrets."
She rolled her eyes and squeezed her hand. "Of course. I've got to go, my lunch is almost up. I'll see you tonight?"
He put a hand on his heart. "Eight o'clock."
She walked away putting a finger to her temple. "See you then, don't be late."
He waved eagerly, smiling widely until she was out of sight.
Tobias stayed silent until Tony dropped back into his seat. The earlier sparkle was gone. It had vanished as quickly as the woman. His face was drawn and pale now. Tired. Tobias leaned in and picked at his plate, pitching his voice low.
"You're not scamming the girl. That's not your style."
Tony winced and didn't look at him. Tobias stared at him, studying the top of his head. Tony's thick brown hair was tangled and curling, there was no trace of the usual gel that held it in its customary styled mess. "No one's said anything about an undercover assignment. Not even the usual unspoken comments."
Tony picked at his salad, his voice quiet. "They wouldn't."
Tobias grabbed the edge of the tablecloth. "They don't know."
Tony didn't reply.
"Who does know?"
Silence was heavy.
Tobias' grip tightened until the cloth was taunt across the table.
"Tony, tell me someone knows."
Tony nodded and glanced up, his eyes weary but determined.
"The director."
"Anyone else?"
His shoulders drew back and he stifled a cough. "You. And it needs to stay this way. Tobias, this is delicate, please-"
Fornell put a hand up and drew a sharp breath. "I'm not ratting you out Tony, no self respecting agent would do that, but this is dangerous. Don't you have back-up?"
Tony smiled but it wasn't the kind, glowing smile that Tobias had found himself getting used to, it was bitter and full of self hatred.
"Haven't you heard Toby? I'm the best there is and I don't need back up because if I screw this up I'll be sent so far away from Washington that…" He shook his head and looked to where the woman had disappeared down the street, the words trailing away like smoke. He pursed his lips then whispered. "If I survive a screw up that is."
Tobias dropped a bill on the table and grabbed Tony's arm, pulling him to his feet.
"With me. Now."
Tony raised an eyebrow but didn't argue, letting himself be dragged back to Fornell's car.
"Epitome of subtle you are." Tony muttered under his breath.
The door slammed and Tobias revved the engine, pulling out onto the street before Tony's seat belt was fully on.
"What's the assignment?"
"Classified."
Tobias swung down a side street and narrowly avoided an oncoming car. Tony could see him grinding his teeth but neither of them said anything. The silence was pressing, pushing Tony against the window of car but he kept his mouth shut. If there was one thing Gibbs' absence had taught him, it was how to shut up and do his job. Funny how the man had spent their entire time together telling him to be quiet and get to work but it was his lack of presence that finally made the lesson stick.
The car eventually pulled into the drive of a two story house with an untrimmed yard. Tony recognized Tobias' home immediately.
"You know I do need to get back on the job, technically I'm on the clock."
Tobias left the car without a word and marched up to the front step swinging the door open and leaving it wide. Tony sighed and shook his head, following Tobias into the sunny house. Biscuit greeted him as he closed door, tail wagging and drool dripping on his shoes. He knelt and rubbed the dogs ears, smiling at the pink ribbon tied around his neck.
"Emily's touch?"
Tobias didn't appear but he could hear clattering from the kitchen. Tony took a deep breath.
"Wish me luck boy." The dog pushed his body close to Tony's leg and followed the man down the hall.
He stepped into the kitchen and a mug of coffee was slammed on the counter in front of him. Tobias slid on a bar stool and stared at him.
"I don't care if it's so wrapped in red tape that the President would need a bleeding buzz saw. You need someone in your corner Tony and right now I'm all you got. What's the assignment? What is so important that your director would threaten your job if you don't do it?"
Tony looked at him for a long moment, emotions flickered in the deep eyes too quickly for Tobias to catch. Finally he wrapped his fingers around the coffee mug and closed his eyes.
"Weapons dealing."
Tobias blinked and his hand jerked, spilling coffee over his fingers.
"Benoit? René Benoit. The Frog. That was René Benoit's daughter?"
Tony opened his eyes and stared at Tobias in shock. "You know him?"
Tobias swung his arms in the air, lurching to his feet and pacing.
"Of him, yeah! Do you have any idea the mess you're in? Damn it DiNozzo, if the CIA finds out what your director is doing they'll have your head. They've been after him for years and what, she just decides she wants in? Is she insane? Is she trying to get you-"
Tobias cut himself off abruptly and Tony chuckled darkly. "You're preaching to the choir Tobes. But she's bound and determined and I'm not in a position to argue."
You're not in a position to do much of anything.
The thought came quick and sharp and Tobias pushed it away savagely. Tony didn't need his negativity, only his support.
"How close are you?"
Tony shrugged and rubbed his chest. "You heard Jeanne, her father's coming this weekend."
Tobias watched the hand rub back and forth, applying pressure and gently circling in a practiced motion. He didn't tear his eyes away.
"And then?"
Tony laid his hand flat on the counter and stared out the back window. "Then I suppose we find out."
Tobias gripped Tony's shoulder and held tightly.
Xxx
"See McGee, he is not here again. I told you he would be gone. He has done nothing since Gibbs has left. I do not understand why he was appointed team leader."
McGee looked down at the papers scattered over Tony's desk and answered absently. "Senior field agents are more likely to get promoted, he had higher authority."
Ziva scoffed and began gathering her belongings.
McGee glanced over at her. "What are you doing? You haven't put in a full shift yet."
She gestured to the desk he was hovering over. "If he does not have to be here than neither do I."
She swept out the door and brushed past an agent that gave her a disgusted look.
The man looked over at McGee and he was surprised to see a coldness in his eyes. "Can I help you?" Tim asked hesitantly.
"What are you doing at Agent DiNozzo's desk?"
McGee glanced down and then backed a step away. "Just looking for a lead he mentioned. We're working a..complicated case. Do you know where he went Agent… um..."
The man rolled his eyes and leaned against Ziva's desk. "Treckson. Agent Treckson. And Tony disappeared a couple hours ago to check out a potential lead with another agent."
McGee started. "Another agent?"
Treckson shrugged and pushed himself off the desk. He called over his shoulder in a low voice as he left the bullpen.
"He wasn't from our department. Looked FBI." He paused at the corner and looked McGee in the eye. "He was looking for you. Since you weren't here he was going to go without back-up until the suit showed up. He was going to be alone. Again."
Treckson tapped the wall with blunt fingernails twice and then walked away without saying anything. McGee dropped heavily in Tony's chair and sighed.
He didn't know what was right anymore.
Hell he didn't even now what he felt anymore.
He was angry. How dare Gibbs leave them. They weren't ready for this.
He was confused. Did Tony really know what he was doing? Did any of them?
He was sad. He hadn't the real chance to get to know Kate before she was gone. Barely a year.
And he was taking all that out on Tony.
And it was wrong. He knew it was.
He shuffled some papers and winced when he saw his reports. They were stacked neatly on the end of the desk, and his handwriting was barely legible. Gibbs would have murdered him then made him do them over then probably killed him again just for the principle of it.
He picked them up and carefully leafed through them, feeling himself shrink at each entry. Sighing he restacked them and set them back. He was about to stand when another piece of paper caught his eye.
It was Tony's daily log.
He narrowed his eyes at the numbers.
Not possible.
There was just no way that was right.
He pushed the chair back and hurried to the elevator.
He had some security footage to check out.
Xxx
Tony stared down the insect resting on the flower. It buzzed quietly and he watched with fascination as it coated itself in pollen.
"Tony?"
He held up a finger and then paced away, following the trail of bees as they dashed back and forth between the flowers. There was a rhythm to it. Watching the bees and butterflies pass by, a pattern on the ground caught his attention.
The dirt floor had been freshly raked.
He rubbed his chin and dropped to his knees, ignoring the tightening in his chest when he knelt closer to the dust rising from the floor.
Tobias was standing behind him and he could feel the question and the continued worry but right now they weren't his main concern. The past few months had been good to Tony's multi-tasking skills. He was now perfectly capable of worrying about his team's ability function together as a working unit, Gibbs' chance of regaining his memory, his undercover mission and the looking consequences of failure, Jeanne's inevitable broken heart, and the John Doe still waiting with Ducky all at once with no problem.
He turned his head and smiled.
There was blood splatter on the wooden platform holding trays of flowers.
Not a lot, but enough.
He stood and felt himself sway. His hand drifted towards his head and he forced himself to take a breath. Tobias stepped closer but he waved him off. Fornell glared at his attempt to deflect and grabbed his arm, steadying the younger man.
Tony ignored the irritation he could feel radiating off his friend and grinned broadly at the agent.
"I found our scene."