Chapter 1

All that I've done

Italy blinked open his lovely brown eyes, almost surprised to find that his limbs weren't weighed down by the heavy presence of evil he had grown accustom to. He practically leapt out of bed in his excitement, but at the sudden movement, he felt the familiar stir within his mind. Of course it wasn't gone, it would never leave him. He sighed sadly and let his eyes slid into their normal position. He could see just fine, but it looked as if they were fully closed. Germany was already out of bed, but as promised the night before, he hadn't woken up the pasta-loving Italian for training. Italy had feigned feeling under the weather; going as far as to refuse pasta, refusing all food for that matter. He wasn't hungry anyway.

He knew his German friend was beginning to worry about him, but it was better that than Italy be forced into the outside world where he could hurt others. Luckily, Germany himself left for training every morning and was rarely around when the darkness awoke and all traces of his fake illness were gone like fog come morning's light. He had to hide it all from Germany, because he knew he would never take a word that came from Italy's mouth seriously; even in the serious situation the whole world had found itself in. He had once tried to tell Germany, but the larger nation had only laughed at him. Italy didn't understand what was so funny.

Now he felt nothing short of terror at the thought of the darkness killing Germany. The presence in Italy claimed that they were one, in that it shared his enemies and would stop at nothing to rid the world of them. The ones he hated had to die. Those who did him wrong had to die. Usually the latter, because how could Italy hate anyone? As payment for the little 'favors' that Italy didn't want in the first place, the darkness used him as a host and used his body as a vessel. He knew that despite the evil that laced the heavy darkness, it would do all it could to keep Italy alive. He had at first not understood why the darkness had stopped him from killing himself on numerous occasions. Now however, Italy understood why it protected him so fiercely: without him it would be condemned to an early grave, Italy's early grave. This all added to his fear that the darkness would target Germany next, because he laughed at Italy, and made him cry. He had to die.

He felt the slightest stir of the presence in him and shuddered against it. Italy stood quickly, determined to get someone to listen to him before he went under again, however fleeting his chances were. Had it been anything else, he would have considered his brother, but his brother wasn't around anymore. The memory of his brother struggling under his confident hand as he held him under the water they had been about to boil to make pasta plagued him most nights. His brother had been his very first victim. Yes, Romano had stopped giving Germany such a hard time, as promised. He would never give anyone a hard time ever again. In a twisted way the darkness hadn't lied so much after all. It all seemed so very long ago that a kind voice had asked of him a simple question.

Do you want help?

It had just been after a huge fight between Romano and himself, and unsurprisingly, the subject had yet again been Germany. It wasn't so much a fight as Romano just yelling at Italy, but it hurt as much as any fight. He had spoken to the harmless phantasm a few times before. It had seemed friendly enough at the time. The darkness' voice had grown cruel after Italy spoke the word that would change the world forever:

Yes.

Not a day later he found himself unwillingly drowning his brother. He had begged the darkness to release its grip on Romano, and to allow himself control over his body again. He had wanted to make things right. He hadn't known how strong the presence was until then. He couldn't fight it, and so he had only been able to watch the blurred world in front of him as he held his brother's head in the pot until he struggled no more. Feeling him give up was more painful than feeling him fight.

Romano's death had come as a shock to everyone; no one had known nations could just up and die in a way that had nothing to do with politics, the military or their economy. Everyone had searched for Romano's murderer. No one ever suspected little Italy, who wept for the brother he had killed—No! He had to stop thinking like that! It was the darkness who was the murderer, not him... But he could never bring himself to think that way. He could only comprehend that he was a murderer, and that everyone would hate him if they knew.

Italy trembled at the memories and thoughts that raced through his head as he made his way down the stairs. He allowed his mind to wander again, trying to think about something more pleasant, when a familiar voice snapped him out of his thoughts and into cruel reality,

"Italy..." The large nation that was standing in the kitchen started upon seeing Italy; it was obvious the German man was close to tears, or at least in a great deal of emotional turmoil.

Italy's breath caught in his throat, because he already knew "I thought you would be training." He didn't have to stretch far sound sick; the exhaustion he felt was no mask.

"I—" He broke off with a heavy sigh "Japan is dead, Italy. I found his body where we usually train."

Of course he was dead: he had called Italy weak the day before, just an off-handed comment, not meaning for Italy to take it seriously. Italy hadn't taken it seriously, not at all, but the darkness took everything seriously.

"No—" Italy choked on his words, feeling guilt and shame rush through him.

"Yes. I'm sorry, Italy... Whoever's been killing nations murdered him. Someone overpowered him, and strangled him to death. I don't think it's safe to train anymore, Italy. Japan was fairly strong; not just anyone could have taken him down"

Italy squeezed his eyes shut tighter than he usually did, trying to prevent the tears that threatened to form at corners of his gaze "I'm scared, Germany."

"I know, Italy, I am too, but no matter what I'll protect—" Germany started, taking a step towards his smaller friend.

"No!" Italy cried, voice trembling with emotion "I'm not scared for me! I'm scared for Germany!"

"For me?" He asked quizzically "Why? I can take care of myself."

Italy searched for the words to explain, desperate to make him understand while there was time "You have to listen to me, Germany!" He insisted.

"I'm listening..." He sighed, sounding almost slightly annoyed, like there was someplace he would have rather been.

"There's no where safe anymore, not as long as I'm—" He voice caught in his throat as he felt the darkness shift in response to his desperation.

Nice try. The demonic voice cackled in Italy's mind, announcing that it had woken up.

"What is it, Italy? Why is nothing safe?" Germany prompted, sounding a bit more interested.

"No!" Italy forced the last word out of his mouth before everything blurred, and he became nothing more than an observer.

Italy heard himself clear his throat, opening his eyes wide to reveal two swirling brown pools of color "I have somewhere I have to go." He announced without explanation before turning to walk out.

"Wait! Italy, explain yourself this instant!" Germany demanded, reaching out to grasp the other nation by the shoulder.

Italy easily shook Germany's firm grasp off, making the German stiffen in surprise. Then the pasta-loving nation simply left, a smile that bordered on cruel dancing on his lips and malice living in his eyes. The door slammed shut behind him, cutting off any protest that Germany might have had.

Austria was quite cruel to you when you were younger, if I remember correctly... And Hungary dressed you in the clothes of a girl, did she not?

It was technically true, but it was a twisted truth, worded to make everything seem much worse than it was. Italy couldn't have argued to save their lives either way, the evil never let Italy get a word in.

Yes, I knew you would agree. I think they shall be next!

Being unable to protest was agonizing.

I don't own Hetalia!

Next chapter was the funnest to write, not sure how it will read, but hopefully with some editing I can have it up soon^^ Thanks for reading!