Hey guys, I was going to wait until tomorrow to post this chapter, but since I'm nice, I decided to post it today. I'm finishing up chapter 5 right now, it will most likely be posted on Monday, tomorrow if I'm lucky enough to finish it. Hope you all like this one, please review if you did, it helps a lot. Thanks and enjoy.

"A secret that's bigger than the one you were just keeping from me?" Kyle crossed his arms and looked at Stan solemnly. Stan shrugged.

The silence was broke when Kyle's phone rang.

"Hello? Mom?" he answered. There was a short pause and Kyle frowned. He held a hand up to the receiver and whispered to Stan what he had just heard.

"My mom says they are snowed in and had to get a hotel. They don't know when they will be back."

Kyle removed his hand from the receiver. "It's fine. No, we are fine. Power's still out, though. Well, that's good. At least the power didn't go out where you guys are. How was the game, anyway? I didn't get a chance to ask. Broncos won? Sweet! That's ten dollars for- I mean, we won a bet with Cartman."

Kyle hung up after a while and turned back to Stan.

"So we won ten dollars?" Stan asked.

"Yeah. Cartman's not going to be happy."

Stan shifted a little.

"What did you want to tell me, Stan?"

"I don't know."

"Stan…"

What could it possibly be that led him to start drinking again? Or has he lied that he quit? Either way it has to be troublesome.

Silence.

The wall clock ticked in the background. Kyle couldn't stand the silence. His mind was swirling with thoughts and worry. He didn't like being alone with his contemplations for this long.

"Stan, please just tell me."

Stan whispered something incoherent, and Kyle sighed.

"Stan, just fucking tell me! You can't go on like this!"

"It's not the right time, Kyle."

"And why the fuck do you say that? We are snowed in, can't go anywhere, and you're telling me it's 'not the right time'?"

"It's just not, Kyle. I thought I was ready but for you to yell and cuss at me makes it harder to say. If I say it now, I'm afraid you will act worse when I do say it."

The two sat in silence.

Kyle pinched the bridge of his nose and sighed softly.

"I'm sorry, Stan."

"I can't tell you yet, Kyle. Please understand. Please don't make me tell you yet. I promise I'll tell you one day, but right now is not the time."

What the fuck could it possibly be?

Kyle drew in a breath and exhaled softly.

"Just… promise me one thing, Stan."

"What, Kyle?"

"That you won't drink. Please, for me?" Kyle looked hopefully into his friend's eyes. He couldn't read Stan's expression.

"Stan…"

"I don't know if I can promise anything right now, Kyle."

Kyle sighed heavily. "Then we aren't ready to be friends again." Kyle got up and walked off. He didn't know where to go, so he walked up to the front door and opened it. The blizzard outside cast whirling snow into the house, tossing heavy snowflakes into the room. The chill had to be below zero.

"Kyle, wait! You'll freeze out there!"

Kyle looked back at his friend. He shut the door tight before any more snow could drift in.

"Please, Kyle. I don't think it's time yet. You'll just have to trust me on this one."

Kyle walked back to Stan.

"Do I have to play a guessing game with you, Stan? Is that what you want?"

"No!"

"I'm just really worried about you."

"Well, don't be!"

"That doesn't reassure me at all."

"Kyle, can we just drop it for the night? I don't want to do this anymore right now. Please?"

"No, Stan! You are worrying me too much. I'm worried that if I fall asleep, you will start drinking and I will have to call your mom and dad and tell them about it. If you don't tell me now, I'll walk out that fucking door and it's over. I can't have a friend who will do this kind of bullshit! If you can't tell me things any more, and trust me to-"

"I like you more than just a friend, alright! Jesus Christ, are you happy now?" Stan got up and bolted up the stairs, almost tripping up them, slamming a door. There was a click, and then silence.

Kyle sat in shock. No, it wasn't shock, it was curiosity. That was the correct word. He just didn't know it was this secret. Kyle, in his own mind, knew something was up. After admitting to Kyle in his cynical phase, he thought it was just a drunken state that had shrouded his mind and made him defenseless.

What?

He sat for another ten minutes, recuperating, before slipping off the couch. He made his way up the stairs by the way of his iPhone screen, illuminating a pathway down the dark corridor.

Kyle knocked on the door to Stan's room.

"Stan?" he called quietly, hesitantly.

"Go away!"

"Please let me in, Stan." Kyle tried to turn the doorknob, but it wouldn't budge. Locked.

"I said go away!"

Kyle heard a banging noise, and after a few seconds, it stopped.

Kyle began to worry.

The lock turned, and after a short while, the door opened slightly with a creak.

"Stan?"

"What."

"Can I come in?"

"What the fuck do you think I opened the door for?"

Kyle swallowed, and, mustering his strength, pushed the door open.

What he saw was a sight for sore eyes.

"You hate me, don't you…" Stan said quietly, his hair in disarray under his hat, a few tufts sticking out from underneath, and Kyle thought he saw blood rolling down his forehead. "It's okay; you have a reason to hate me…"

Kyle's mouth felt dry. He swallowed.

"Hate you?"

"Hate me."

"Why would I hate you?"

"Because I told you my secret."

"Stan…"

Kyle scooted closer to Stan, who was on the floor now, his hands in his face.

He looked up at Kyle with glazed over eyes. Blood smeared his forehead.

"What did you do to yourself…?" Kyle said, pushing Stan's raven hair out of his face.

"I deserve it…"

Kyle could feel a bump on Stan's forehead now.

"Is that what that banging was?"

"You told me not to drink, so I didn't."

Kyle took Stan's hands and peered at them in the dark, and Stan jerked back a little. They were smeared with blood.

"Don't do this to yourself, either. Don't hurt yourself over this."

"But I deserve it."

"Why do you think that?"

"Because I like you… more than just a friend."

It seemed like it pained Stan to say those words, and it pained Kyle to see him hurt like this.

Kyle swallowed. He didn't know how to react to those words. He didn't know how he himself felt about the situation. Thinking back to Stan's cynical phase, he thought Stan was just… drunk. And he was. But actually admitting it to him without being in a drunken state of mind was a different story. Kyle thought it was just the alcohol talking that day, but now he wasn't so sure.

"Kyle, I love you." The words echoed in his mind.

All Kyle wanted was to see his friend happy, to see him safe. He was willing to do anything to keep him from hurting himself again. If it had to be more than friends with Stan, then he would do it.

He thought he had seen a change for the good in Stan a week ago, but it all fell quickly when he burst out in class, screaming at Butters because he and Cartman were arguing about who would win the Denver Broncos Vrs. Baltimore Ravens football game.

"Stan, I…"

"What, Kyle." Stan looked at Kyle through bleary eyes.

"I like you more as a friend, too."

It was hard to say, but he needed to do it, for the sake of Stan. For the risk of losing him. Losing him to the alcohol. Losing him as a friend.