Sam rocked SJ and Finn in his arms. He sighed watching them sleep. He missed them. It had been almost four weeks since Mercedes had kicked him out. Everyone tried their best to get Mercedes to try and change her mind but no such luck. Mercedes was stubborn and she stuck to her guns. She hadn't so much as said five words to him.
Between Kurt and Santana they had helped her avoid him as well. She was always gone when he got to the house to watch the kids with either Santana or Kurt there waiting for him. They also arrived before she came home to take over his parenting duties until she came home. Blaine sat across from him rocking Lily in his arms. Lia was sleeping soundly. Sam sighed.
"I miss them so much."
"Sam you know I love having you as a roommate again. But you need to get back home. I would suggest you find a place of your own but Kurt still wouldn't be home. It's getting to the point where he and Santana took turns spending their nights at home and here. I miss my husband."
Sam sighed. "I miss my wife. She is just so stubborn."
"Can you blame her Sam? I wasn't there for the smack down as Santana put it but I saw the aftermath. Sam you broke something in her that I don't know if you can fix."
"I never meant for that to happen. I honestly thought this would blow over. That is why I have respected her wishes."
The door opened and Kurt walked in. "I am here to relieve you guys."
Sam nodded. "Thanks but I am not leaving. I have given Mercedes almost a month of space. I have done everything she asked. Now she is going to talk to me."
"Sam not that I don't love you trying to win your wife back and all but Blaine and I are babysitting tonight."
Blaine looked at him. "We are?"
Kurt nodded. "Mercedes has an engagement tonight. She is singing for the National Cancer Society."
"But if you aren't going with her then who is because you know she hates to attend those things alone."
Kurt looked at his watch. "Oh look at the time. I should make bottles for the little ones."
Kurt walked out of the room and Sam placed the boys in their cribs following him and bumping into Mercedes.
"Sam what are you doing here?"
"I was waiting to talk to you. I think it is high time we discussed what is going on."
Mercedes sighed walking past him. "Sam I can't right now I forgot to grab my clothes earlier. I have to meet Andrea so she can do my hair and makeup."
"Who are you going with?"
Mercedes let out a laugh. "Are you serious? Boy get out of my face with that?"
"Well you aren't going with Kurt or Santana. So who is it?"
"Sam I have to go. And FYI whoever I am or am not going with stopped being your concern when I kicked you out of my house."
"Our house. And I left to give you space."
"Please you left probably to go running after your little girlfriend."
"Stop it. I am never cheated on you. I never meant to hurt you or your feelings I made a mistake. Actually I made a bunch of stupid mistakes."
"Sam I have to go I don't have time for this."
"Tell me who you are going with."
Sam stood in front of her and she sighed. "I'm going with Christian."
"Christian! Mercedes have you forgotten we are married?"
"Sam I need to go."
"WHY SO YOU CAN GO ON YOUR DATE?"
Mercedes grabbed her dress and glanced at Sam. "Well you had one so I am just taking my cues from you. If you are here when I get back I wouldn't wait up. It might be a long night." She said emphasizing the word long. She walked into the nursery giving the quads kisses as Sam waited for her outside the door. He followed her down the stairs.
"And what exactly does that mean?"
Mercedes ignored him walking out the door and Sam punched the wall. Kurt sighed walking over to Sam.
"I know now may not be the best time for this but she wanted me to give this to you. But don't shoot the messenger. I am going to go back with the kids."
Sam took the envelope from Kurt and opened it. He saw red as he noticed the petition for separation. He crumbled the paper up and threw it across the room.
Mercedes sighed sadly getting in the waiting cab. She wiped the tears from her eyes. She wanted to hurt Sam as much as he had hurt her. But hurting him just hurt her more. She filed for separation because they were stuck. She didn't want to be around him. Whether he did or didn't cheat was discovered weeks ago. She knew he would never cheat on her. She just couldn't trust that he had her best interest at heart.
As she arrived at Andrea's salon she hoped getting primped would make her feel better. But no matter how beautiful she looked on the outside it couldn't take away from the pain she felt inside. She wanted to make her relationship work but the person she became when she attacked Pamela was not someone she wanted to be again.
The magazines were having a field day with their version of what happened. She read a few before she just tuned them out. Some say Pam beat herself up to get attention, others claimed that Mercedes and Santana jumped her because they found out she was seeing Sam. The icing on the cake that was her marriage came when Pam claimed to be carrying Sam's baby. Mercedes hadn't told Sam about that one because she knew the girl was lying. She wanted to protect Sam from going off of the girl because she still loved him very much.
By the time she was finished getting ready Christian had arrived. She liked him well enough he seemed pretty cool when they first met. He was working on his album and they decided to do a duet together. Sam always said Christian has a crush on her and after a while she knew it was true. The only reason she agreed to go with him tonight was because they were promoting their upcoming single.
As they exited the limo and the flashes went off Mercedes wished Sam was on her arm. He always had a way of calming her when they had events like this. As she posed with Christian something just felt wrong. She smiled through her pain, she smiled even though her heart was breaking. That is what she often did, hid her feelings sometimes even from herself. Tonight she had to get in front of her audience and pretend that she was not dying inside. She missed her life she missed Sam.
Mercedes arrived home around two in the morning. She had hoped Sam was still there but she figured he wasn't. She walked into the house taking her shoes off and locking the door. The first room she went to was the nursery. She smiled seeing the sleeping faces of her beautiful babies and sighed closing the door. She went to her room figuring Kurt and Blaine were sleep in the guest room. As she opened the door she was taken in by the glowing lights. Sam stood in front of her with a dozen roses. She looked around the candle filled bedroom and backed up. She shut the door and turned to walk away. Sam opened the door reaching for her.
"Mercedes come back."
"What are you doing? Why are you still here?"
"Baby please just come back into the room and I will explain everything. Before you decide we do have children sleeping across the hall and the fire extinguisher is in the bedroom."
Mercedes side eyed him for a second then folded her arms walking into the bedroom. Sam followed her closing the door. Second glance around the room had her taking in the romantic scene. Sam had lit candles around the room and had soft music playing. Mercedes sighed heavily seeing the side table filled with fruit. On the floor there were flower pedals leading to the bathroom. Feeling her curiosity peaked she opened the bathroom wider and exhaled loudly seeing candles surrounding their oval Jacuzzi tub. The sweet scented candles gave a sense of passion and love in the room.
Sam walked behind her. "I know you are angry, I know that we haven't so much as talked to each to other in the last few weeks but I know that we have love here. I know that you are still in love with me. I can see it in your eyes."
He turned her towards him. "When I got the separation noticed I realized that you were not just embarrassed, you were hurt. I allowed some woman to come and make you feel insecure and unsafe in our marriage. I should have never put you in the situation. I was going out of my mind wondering what you and that loser were doing. And it hit me I had to deal with that thought for one night while you had to deal with it for two weeks."
Mercedes backed away from Sam but he pulled her closer to him. "I know that I will be spending the rest of my life trying to make all this up to you. But I figured at least for tonight I can show you that I really do love you and want to try to get this to work."
Sam tried to hug her but she pushed away from him. "Sam I can't do this right now."
"Then when can you? Baby I miss you. I truly miss you. I miss holding you and I miss touching you. If you want this to be over then you look me in my eyes and tell me that it is over. You tell me that our vows mean nothing to you and we cannot overcome everything like we thought. We stood in front of our family and friends. We committed our lies to each other, don't you remember that? We were so happy back then. We were so happy until I made the stupid decision to go to Paris."
Mercedes saw Sam's eyes glisten in the candle light. He fell to his knees pulling her close to him.
"I never want to make you feel that way again, I swear it. I swear to consider you and your feelings just please baby don't walk away from me. Don't end this. We belong together and just because I was stupid enough to let my guard down and let some woman who means nothing to me come in and try to ruin us please we deserve better. You deserve better."
Sam cried hugging her stomach. Mercedes felt tears come to her eyes as she ran her hands over his head trying to console him. She tried to pull away but Sam held her close.
"Please Cedes. Please talk to me tell me it's not too late. Tell me you still want me and this can work."
Mercedes lifted Sam's face to meet hers. "Sam I want to trust you I do. I know that you would never cheat on me but I don't know how to let it go. I don't know how to just forget what you did. And you are still working for her I just cant."
"I quit."
"What?"
"Modeling was something I lucked into. Everyone said I looked good and I didn't want to go to college so I started to model and things worked out for me they did. I made a lot of money and I got to travel but I can see the strain it put on us even before all this happened. I don't have joy for it anymore and if you can't find the joy in your job then you need to get a new one."
Mercedes touched his face with her hand to turn his gaze back to hers. "But it's your career."
"That I can live without, I want to do something that makes me feel about it like you do with your singing."
"And what's that?"
"I want to create my own comic books. I still draw in my spare time and I have the means and the time to do it now. That way I can spend more time at home with you and the babies. And when you go on tour I can go with you."
"Sam you are giving up your dream."
"No I'm not. I am giving up a job. I married my dream."
Mercedes pulled Sam to her and enveloped his lips with hers. She didn't think she could or would forgive him so easily. But looking in his eyes and hearing his words made her realize Sam was her dream too. For as long as she remembered the only thing or person who felt as good to her as the music was Sam.
She pulled away holding him close. "I don't know if we will ever get back to how we were but I am willing to try."
Sam kissed her smiling as he pulled away. "I love you."
"I love you too." She said looking at the tub. "So do you think the water is still warm?"
"How about we find out?"
Mercedes bit her bottom lip. "What about the babies?"
"Blaine and Kurt have the monitors. So how about I rerun the bath water and you blow out the candles in the room. And get undressed so I can show you just how much I appreciate you."
Mercedes nodded walking back into the room. As she begun to blow out the candles closed her eyes making a wish on each one. She knew it might be silly but hey if Sam could throw a bunch of coins in the east river and make a wish on their relationship then she could wish on candles.