Hey guys! Thank you for all of the reviews, favorites, and alerts! I love you guys.
This is the penultimate chapter! And… it's not full of sugar and rainbows. So yeah. Get ready.
Enjoy the chapter~!
Chapter 14 Rain on Me
~.~.~.~
Levi stumbled out of the dorm, the rain immediately attacking him.
"Eren? Eren!"
Pushing the wet hair out of his face, Levi ran around the campus.
I fucked up. I fucked up beyond forgiveness. But… I just need to see him! Eren!
Levi spotted Armin walking briskly back to the dorms, his umbrella hiding some of his face.
"Armin! Hey, Armin!" Levi hurried over to the short blond, feeling a slight glimmer of hope. "Armin!"
Armin looked up at the black haired man approached him. His eyes narrowed. "Oh… Levi."
"Eren… where's Eren? I need to see him immediately! Do you know where he is?"
"He's gone, Levi." Armin replied bitterly. "He left hours ago with Mikasa. And no, I have no idea where they went. But I saw them leave with another man. I couldn't see his face, so I don't know who."
~.~.~.~
A week earlier…
Eren slurped soda through his straw as he looked at Mikasa and Armin innocently. It was the morning after Levi and Eren's birthday tryst, and his sister and best friend were staring at him.
Eren put his glass down. "What? You two invited me to this café, and now you don't say anything."
Armin cleared his throat. "Well, uh… actually, Mikasa wanted to… er…"
"What?" Eren sipped through the straw. "Spit it out already!"
"Whose ass was deflowered, yours or Levi's?" Mikasa asked bluntly.
Eren choked on his Coke. "W-What the hell?!"
Armin covered his face with one hand. "Yeah… Hanji did a terrible job trying to convince us that you and Levi were playing a game made for angry twelve year olds. Mikasa was just a bit concerned… since you guys just kinda started dating. It's been what, only four months? And Mikasa was told by Hanji a few weeks ago that you and Levi also… did some deflowering right after you two confessed your feelings."
Eren's eyes widened. "How the hell did that slip?!"
"Well, in Hanji's defense, she was talking in her sleep." Mikasa sighed. "But Eren, I'm just worried that you and Levi are taking things too fast. He is your first boyfriend. I'm just afraid you'll get hurt."
"Why? Because he's not a woman?" Eren snapped indignantly.
"No!" Mikasa was shocked at Eren's accusation. "That's not it at all!"
"Yeah, right." Eren stood up. "Mikasa, Levi and I are fine. We've been through too much shit in this short amount of time to let it affect us."
"Eren…" Mikasa looked Eren dead in the eye. "We're all going through rough times. Just… don't think everything will go away that easily. I know you better than anyone. Just be careful with your emotions, okay?"
"Tch. Don't question my relationship with him anymore." With that, Eren left Mikasa and Armin behind in the café.
"Mikasa…" Armin looked at her warily.
Mikasa just sighed. "The fact that he got so defensive tells me that he still has something bothering him, even though he's trying his best to hide it. And he accused me of thinking I didn't want them together because Levi's not a woman. That's a warning bell. And Levi… he has had to endure many painful events. Even though he's really good at masking his emotions… I'm certain there's a ticking time bomb waiting to go off. I just hope Eren gets his head together and faces the problem… or else it will set off an irreversible chain reaction."
~.~.~
Eren stormed back towards the dorms.
Damn her… we will be fine. Eren thought angrily. So what if we've had sex in the early stages of our relationship? That doesn't define our whole relationship. And yes, we've experienced a lot of emotional trauma. But we got through it together. And that's something special. I'm not harboring anything! I'm fine… I'm fine… I'm… fine?
Levi walked out of his psychology class, feeling absolutely wonderful. Not about getting another A on his test, but because of yesterday. Unbeknownst to him, his day would get ruined by his bespectacled best friend waiting for him outside.
"Hey Levi!" Hanji greeted him.
"Hi." Levi replied. "What's up?"
Hanji bit her lip, her usual eccentricity gone. "Well… Mikasa wanted me to speak with you about something. I know not to bother you about your personal life, but what Mikasa asked me to do made a lot of sense."
"…the hell is wrong with you?" Levi put his hand on Hanji's forehead to check if she had a fever. "Why are you being so fucking serious? What, did you run out of crack?"
"Levi… please."
Levi rolled his eyes. "Fine. This better not be some Dr. Phil shit."
Hanji twiddled her thumbs. "Weeeell, by the end of this, it might be Jerry Springer."
Levi raised an eyebrow. "It's that bad? Well fine, go ahead."
The two friends sat down on a bench.
"We're a bit concerned about you and Eren." Hanji began.
"…why?" Levi's eyes narrowed.
"Now hear me out." Hanji raised her hands. "Mikasa and I don't want to start trouble. We just want to confront a problem before it progresses. Do you guys talk about your feelings on a regular basis?"
"Fuck no." Levi scoffed. "What are we, high school girls? We don't have time for that shit. The only time we really discussed stuff like that was when I was mourning my fallen friends and when Carla died. We like to look forward and never look back."
"That's really good, it is." Hanji assured him. "But… you've been rather possessive of Eren lately, like if he's out of your sight for five seconds, you go crazy. For example, when Eren was practicing for Petra's skit, you went awol. You couldn't handle that he wasn't spending as much time with you as before, thought temporary. That's not good, Levi. I think there's something still wrong that needs to be brought to light."
Levi was tapping his foot on the ground. "Well the last time I let my lover out of my sight, he fucking died!"
Hanji's eyes widened. "Levi…?"
Levis stood up. "Whatever, I have to go. Nice talk."
The short man stomped away. Hanji was left astonished.
Levi… I knew it. Hanji thought sadly. You're trying your best not to get hurt again. But please…you have to fully trust Eren. You have to allow him to be human. I'm afraid that if Eren makes one mistake… it'll be the end.
A week later…
Levi went to the student mail room one afternoon. He didn't go there often, since the mail he often receives are bills and offers to be in a commercial to advertise the military. That day, however, he was surprised to find an actual letter in the bulk of envelopes. The return address was…
"Grisha Jaeger."
Levi threw the other mail away and sat down, opening Grisha's mail. Another envelop slipped out with Eren's name on it. Picking it up, Levi tucked it in his pocket and unfolded the letter addressed to him.
Levi,
It's been almost two months since you've visited me. I am sure you will be pleased to know that rehab is going well. I have been sober for one month. I even bought a house far away so I can start over fresh. By the time you receive this letter, I will probably be in Mitras. I am ready to face my son and daughter again. I know that they will probably want to kill me, which I am ready to endure.
If I wrote directly to Eren, I know he would most likely rip up my letter, not believing a single word I wrote. So I wrote to you first. Please give the other envelope to Eren, and explain to him what you've done for me. Then maybe, just maybe, he will want to see me.
Thank you for snapping me out of my nightmare.
Dr. Grisha Jaeger
Levi couldn't help the smile etching onto his face.
"Eren… this is it!"
He stood up and hurried out of the mail room. He checked his watch,
"Okay, it's three pm. Eren should be getting out of history about now."
Levi jogged to the history building. He saw Mikasa exiting the door.
"Mikasa." Levi walked up to her. "Is Eren still inside?"
The black haired girl gave Levi an unreadable expression. Going back to what Hanji told him several days ago, Levi knew what Mikasa was thinking.
"No. He went around to the back of the building with someone. I don't know why, but she said she wanted to tell him something. Surely that's okay, Levi."
Levi scowled. "Of course it is. Thanks."
Levi brushed past the girl and started to walk towards the back. Despite his confident response to Mikasa, he felt a sinking feeling to his stomach.
Shit… why am I feeling this way now? Is it… because I'm suddenly self-aware? No, that's ridiculous. I'm ridiculous. Eren has some fucking happy shit waiting for him in this letter. And as soon as he's finished doing whatever business he has, he will receive it, and fucking cry tears of joy.
Levi clutched his stomach as he continued his walk. However, nothing he could have thought would have prepared him for what he witnessed behind the building.
~.~.~.~.~.~.
Eren wrapped his arms around the shorter girl, feeling her tongue press against his. He closed his eyes.
What the hell am I doing? How did Mina Carolina and I get here?! Stop Eren! Stop!
Mina Carolina let out a tiny moan at the feel of Eren invading her mouth.
No! No! First, she takes me back here and confesses feelings for me. I could have sworn I said no… but… I didn't.
Mina tangled her fingers into Eren's hair, pulling his head down closer to hers.
I have a boyfriend! I have Levi! So why am I doing this?! Why am I letting Mina kiss me? Why am I kissing back?
Suddenly, a memory from his mother flooded his mind…
"So Eren, has anyone caught your eye at all?"
"Mom! Why do you wanna know?"
"This is college we're talking about. In high school you never dated anyone. I'm sure there's a lucky lady on campus."
Eren's brow furrowed as the kiss turned sloppy.
That's right… my mother always dreamed of having grandchildren, so of course she would assume I liked girls. I can't blame her. So maybe… I'm just seeing if I could do it…?
A soft sound scared the living daylight out of Eren and Mina. The brunette looked down, seeing a fallen envelope on the ground next to a pair of feet. He slowly looked up, eventually meeting Levi's eyes. He looked absolutely mortified.
"Levi…" Eren murmured, horrified.
Mina looked at Eren, then Levi, then back to Eren again. Her mouth formed an 'o' shape.
"Oh no! I'm so sorry!" Mina bowed in Levi's direction. "Back in Trost, Eren said you two weren't dating, so I thought he was still single! Please forgive me!"
Mina ran past Levi, her face red with embarrassment.
"Levi…" Eren took a step towards his pissed boyfriend. "Please… let me-"
"Shut the fuck up and get the hell out of my face!" Levi lashed lividly. "And don't you dare fucking follow me, or else I'll go to jail for physical assault!"
Levi walked off, headed in an unknown direction. Eren trembled, not sure if this was reality or not.
What have I done?! WHAT HAVE I DONE?! Mikasa was right! And as soon as I figured it out, it was too late! This is my fault! All my fault. Levi, I'm sorry! I'm so, so sorry!
Eren sobbed. "I… I didn't mean to! I was weak! I am weak! I didn't let go of my insecurities like I said I would!"
Eren slumped to the ground and picked up the envelope Levi dropped, trying his best to wipe his eyes dry. It had his name on it, so he opened it up.
"This is from… Dad?"
Later that night, Levi dragged Hanji to the bar to drink off his anger and despair.
"Levi…" Hanji called to him, in the beginning stages of being drunk. "That's your eighth beer. Don't you think you should slow down?"
Levi chugged the rest of the alcohol down and slammed the bottle down. "Hell no." He slurred. "I'm just getting started."
Levi's irritation grew when a break up song on the jukebox began to play.
Cryin' on the corner, waitin' in the rain
I swear I'll never, ever wait again
You gave me your word, but words for you are lies
Darlin', in my wildest dreams, I never thought I'd go
But it's time to let you know
I'm gonna harden my-
Levi threw a beer bottle at the machine, effectively shutting it off.
"Shut the fuck up!" He yelled at the inanimate machine. "What you're gonna do is harden your dick! Cause you need to get fucking laid!"
Hanji chugged down her fourth bottle of beer, not wanting to remember the embarrassment Levi caused her in the morning.
"Levi…hic… you still haven't told me why you've forced me to come here. You only get wasted when something has really pissed you off. So what is it?"
"Bartender, give me two shots of vodka." Levi ordered.
When the bartender returned with his shots, Levi quickly downed him before replying.
"I caught Eren snogging a fucking girl, that's what." Levi snapped, wanting to erase the memory from his head forever. "He was so shameless too, groping her around her waist and shit."
Hanji's eyes widened as the alcohol took over her senses. "Reaaaallly?" She slurred. "That's so unlike Eren…hic… why would he do thaaaat?"
"I don't fucking know!" Levi barked. "All I know is that he's been acting really shady with that girl this entire time. Bringing her up at Thanksgiving, disowning me as his boyfriend when he met up with her in Trost, and now this! They could have been in a relationship this entire fucking time, and I would have had no damn clue!"
"But Leeeeviiii!" Hanji whined, downing her fifth beer. "Eren's in love with you! He gets so shy when he talks about you, and his eyes light up. There may be more to this than what meets the eye!"
"What, then?! What else could he be! I'm not taking "experimenting" as a fucking excuse!" Levi scowled. "What if I suddenly wanted to experiment with a fucking girl?! For the sake of science or some shit like that?"
"SCIENCE!" Hanji cried, her eyes brightening up at the word. "That would be so cool!"
"Of course you would, you twisted bitch." Levi drawled, the alcohol doing the talking for him. "But you know what, it's not such a bad idea. I want to see firsthand what makes women so fucking attractive in the first place. Who wants to conduct an experiment?"
"I DO!" The fully intoxicated Hanji cried, raising her hand in the air.
The next thing they knew, Levi and Hanji were back in her dorm, making out… undressing each other…
~.~.~.~.~
"Eren, just go talk to him." Armin patted Eren's back.
Armin and Mikasa were in Eren's dorm room, trying to console him. Eren had been crying for hours, and his flow of tears never lessened.
"But… but I can't!" Eren sniffled. "I knew what I was doing… but at the same time, I didn't. How do I explain that to Levi? This is all my fault. It's so stupid! I let a memory trigger me, and all I wanted to do was see if I could do it… if I could ever be attracted to a girl. It's so fucked up, and it sounds so wrong, but I can't explain it!"
Mikasa wrapped her arms around her remorseful brother, squeezing him tight. "I get it perfectly. You were confused, and Mina's confession made that confusion rise to the surface. You wanted to get the confusion out of your mind. So you tried it by kissing her. Yes, it was wrong of you to do so, but it is not unfixable. You never wanted to hurt Levi, right?"
Eren sat up, wiping his eyes. "I didn't…"
"So tell him what you told us." Armin suggested soothingly.
Mikasa took out her dorm room key and handed it to Eren. "He's probably in Hanji and mine's room. She's most likely trying to console him, too. Just ask Hanji is she could leave you two alone, and I know she'll do so."
Eren took Mikasa's key, his hands shaking. "O-Okay… I'll do it."
"We'll be right here." Armin assured Eren. "So if things go south, which I'm confident it won't, then just come back."
Eren nodded, standing up. "Okay… see you two in a few."
Wiping the remainder of his tears away, Eren left the dorm room and walked a few doors down to Hanji and Mikasa's dorm room. He knocked first, but no one answered. He knocked again, but still no answer.
They must be hiding. Eren sighed to himself. Can't blame them. Levi wants to kill me, I'm sure… but… I love him, so I'm willing to face the consequences for my actions.
Eren inserted the key into the keyhole and unlocked the door. He went inside.
"Levi…!" Eren's voice halted.
Levi and Hanji were in bed, naked, and fondling each other. Eren's eyes bulged, and his lips quivered.
No… I must be hallucinating! There's no way… THERE'S NO WAY!
Levi and Hanji looked up, still completely drunk. Eren ran out, slamming the door behind him.
"Eren…" Levi closed his eyes and passed out.
The next morning, Levi woke to the sound of rain pattering on the window and z Hanji pacing back and forth, muttering to herself.
"I can't believe I did that! I ruined everything! I am a shit person! Shit! Shit! Shit!"
Levi sat up, rubbing his eyes. He looked down and realized he was naked.
"What the hell?!" Levi shouted, almost falling out of bed.
Hanji stared at him, tears in her eyes. At that moment, everything from last night was brought back to his mind… including Eren walking in on them about to have sex.
"Where's Eren?!" Levi cried, rising out of bed. He felt dizzy and nauseous, but no one of that mattered. He needed to find him.
"I don't know!" Hanji wailed. "I called Petra, who usually meets up with him on Fridays, but she never saw him! This is all my fucking fault! I knew better…!"
Levi quickly threw on his clothes from last night. He winced at the filth, but he pushed that aside.
"I'll look for him. I'll find him." Levi assured Hanji.
He ran out of her dorm and quickly entered his own. Of course, his brunette was not in there. To Levi's horror, all of Eren's belongings were gone. The beds were even pushed back to their original spots. What hurt Levi the most was the green duct tape on the floor that separated the room into two parts again.
Levi stumbled out of the dorm, the rain immediately attacking him.
"Eren? Eren!"
Pushing the wet hair out of his face, Levi ran around the campus.
I fucked up. I fucked up beyond forgiveness. But… I just need to see him! Eren!
Levi spotted Armin walking briskly back to the dorms, his umbrella hiding some of his face.
"Armin! Hey, Armin!" Levi hurried over to the short blond, feeling a slight glimmer of hope. "Armin!"
Armin looked up at the black haired man approached him. His eyes narrowed. "Oh… Levi."
"Eren… where's Eren? I need to see him immediately! Do you know where he is?"
"He's gone, Levi." Armin replied bitterly. "He left hours ago with Mikasa. And no, I have no idea where they went. But I saw them leave with a man. I couldn't see his face, so I don't know who. All Eren told me was that he needed to get out of here before you both get hurt even more."
Armin's voice rose with each word, his anger getting to him. "And it's your fault! Eren was just confused! He's always been an idiot, unable to convey his thoughts properly. But he felt so horrible for what he did! He wanted to talk to you face to face like a man, ready to accept whatever consequence. But you! You slept with Hanji! What the fuck is wrong with you?!"
As Armin continued to berate Levi, the raven haired man slumped to the ground, not caring that his clothes were getting muddied.
Levi couldn't cry. All he felt was shame, loneliness, and the rain pouring down his body.
Cliffhanger? Cliffhanger.
The last chapter will be coming soon. What will happen to the broken Eren and Levi?
And yes, relatuonships can go south this quickly in real life. I have a personal experience. If you're curious as to why Levi and Eren went down, let me know and I'll explain. :) I don't want anyone to be going "Wtf?"
If you've liked the story so far, add this to your favorites and alerts. Though alerts probably won't be as necessary, since there's only one chapter left.
And remember...
REVIEWS ARE LIKE PORN TO WRITERS, SO SATISFY OUR URGES!
I really appreciate feedback. See you in the last one!
PRK