I'm on an updating spree with pretty much all my stories. Hooray for a weekend with nothing pressing to do!

Oh, and I'm finally moving on with the story. Onward, to adventure!

Nearly a week later I was deemed well enough to be out of bed for more than a few hours a day. I took meals with Elrond and his family and tried to pretend like nothing was wrong. Only Arwen and I knew of my plans to depart. I hadn't even told Kili. I suppose it was for the best. If I did, he might try to follow me.

The twins, certainly, would be sorry to learn that I had gone when the time came. They found me a worthy adversary at chess and fencing. But it seemed to me that I was nothing more than an amusement to them. I may have been wrong, of course, but on the whole they treated me as a novelty more than a friend.

I would leave in two days. Arwen had been busy securing supplies for me, and I owed her more than enough already. Somehow, she had managed to get a pack together for me and find a pony all with the utmost secrecy.

Kili was doing remarkably well. He was able to sit up and talk again, and was even working on walking. He complained of some numbness in his right leg, and the healers had provided him with a walking stick, which he, of course, refused to use. He was able to eat again without regurgitating anything, and I would occasionally take meals with him and tried to avoid his unceasing questions as to where the rest of the company had gone, and why I had stayed behind. The only thing I would tell him was that I had stayed to make sure he was all right.

"You don't need to worry about me, brother." he said one day. "I'm as fit as…" he tried to laugh but broke off into a coughing fit, which were still regular occurrences. The bruises on his back were still healing, and it gave him pain to laugh. That was the only thing I missed, his laughter. But on the whole he was doing much better than he had at the start, so I never mentioned it.

On my last night in Rivendell, Elladan, Elrohir, and I were at a game of chess. This had become a nightly occurrence, and I almost regretted leaving the peace and comfort of Elrond's house for the arduous peril that lay ahead. But I must not forget who I was, and what my purpose was. I was a warrior, after all, and my strategies lay better employed in fighting than in a board game.

"Something wrong, Fili?" asked Elladan. I hadn't noticed my grip on the knight I was holding had turned to a clench.

"Just thinking," I said.

"Fretting seems more like it," he replied. "You can't dwell on misfortune forever. Sooner or later, you'll find your way, even if it's not the one you expected." Maybe he was right. Maybe I was taking the foolish course, trying to prove myself. There was always the chance I'd never be forgiven. And then what? Where would I go from there?

As elves do not sleep, I had to wait a considerable length after everyone had retired for the evening in leisure activities before I could make my escape. Arwen had said she would come for me when the coast was relatively clear. I busied myself with packing up my gear until then. I had a few more things to carry than what I had come with—Arwen had been generous and Elrond had gifted me with the fiddle I had played upon my arrival. He told me he believed it was in good hands and had brought him joy to hear it played again so beautifully.

Tucking everything neatly into my pack, I donned my outer coat and tucked my daggers and throwing axes into their respective pockets. There was nothing left to do now but wait.

I heard footsteps approaching, but it wasn't Arwen's light stride nor anyone else's I could recognize. This was a slow, dragging sound, like someone trying to walk with a gimp leg.

Kili appeared in my doorway, sweating with the exertion of dragging himself down two flights of stairs and a corridor, something he hadn't been able to manage before.

"Fili, something's wrong," he blurted out, leaning on the doorframe. "I can sense it." Then he looked up at me. "What are you…"

"Shh!" I hushed. "No one must know!"

"Know what?" he asked, as Arwen appeared beside him.

"Are you ready?" she asked. Then she caught sight of Kili. "Oh, dear…"

"What?" he asked, looking between the two of us for an explanation. "What's going on?"

"I'm leaving, Kili. I'm going after the company." I whispered. "Keep your voice down."

"Why? Why must this be done in secrecy?"

"No one wishes me to leave. Arwen agreed to help. We'd be getting her in trouble if anyone knew she was assisting me."

"What happened?"

Leading him into the room, I sat him down carefully in a chair. "Thorin...Thorin disowned me. That's why I'm still here. We had an argument over your fate, and I said I'd rather stay with you than go traipsing after a dragon and a pile of gold."

He looked appalled and hurt at that. "So why now are you leaving and going after them?"

I sighed. "It's what I must do."

"Why?" There was an odd squeak in his voice, he was on the verge of tears. Shaking his head, he repeated his question. "Why? You said you wanted to stay to look after me! Does Erebor really mean that much to you?" A tear slid down his cheek which Arwen politely pretended not to see.

"Kili, I know this is hard for you to understand. But you're not in line for the throne. I am. If something happens to Thorin in battle or against Smaug, it is my duty to take over. Regardless of what he said."

"And you're just so special for that," he sneered. "You talk about Thorin when you're the one valuing a forgotten kingdom above your own brother!" A sob overtook him, and he pressed his fingers into his eyes. It wasn't like him to be this fragile.

"I'm sorry," I said helplessly. "I can't stay here anymore." My vision blurred suddenly. I hated seeing him like this.

Arwen had retreated into the corridor, probably more than a little embarrassed to be witnessing this.

"Kili," I sighed heavily. "I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to do this. You'll be safe here, I promise. I'll have Arwen tell her brothers to look after you. You'll like them. It's thanks to them I'm now one of the best chess players in all of Middle Earth."

"Chess," he scoffed. "What about sparring? What about riding? What about you? They are not my brothers. You are, and you're the only one I've got." He lifted his head to face me with a completely wounded look.

"I'm sorry," I repeated, at a loss for any other words. Then I turned and walked out the door. The last I saw of my brother was him still slumped in the chair, looking miserable, defeated, and betrayed.

Out in the stables, I asked Arwen to leave me for a moment. I could hide my feelings no longer, and spent a few moments shedding tears while uselessly trying to fight them back. I had betrayed and disappointed Kili, the only reason I had wanted to stay—the only reason I wasn't hundreds of miles ahead with the company by now.

But my mind was made up. I had said my goodbyes, for what they were worth, and I was going. Maybe I'd return someday, and Kili might forgive me. I could not think about that now. I had a journey to start, hopefully before daybreak at this rate.

"Are you ready?" asked Arwen, returning with an extra blanket to shove in my pack.

"Yes." I said, taking her hand. She looked taken aback for a moment, then relaxed. "Thank you for your kindness. I will never forget what you have done for me. And my brother."

She opened the stable doors and I led the pony into a gallop across the steep mountainous terrain. As I was crossing the field that led into the Misty Mountains, I heard a voice calling me.

"Fili! Filiiiiiiii!" Kili called, loping as fast as he could over the uneven ground and long grass, leaning heavily on his stick. He had his pack with him, and all his weapons, though his arm was still in a sling.

I turned the pony around and trotted it in his direction. "What are you doing out here? Get back inside!"

He shook his head. "I'm coming with you." he said defiantly. It was pointless to argue. If I refused, he would follow me anyway. I dismounted and carefully shoved him into the saddle in front of me. And then we were on our way.

We tore through the narrow mountain paths as fast as safety would allow. I intended to lose no time in catching up with the company. It had been nearly three weeks since their departure, and they were surely through the mountains by now, provided they hadn't been captured by goblins. Soon the mountain pass grew so constricted that I had to dismount and lead the frightened pony by the reins, step by step, while Kili clung to the saddle with his good hand for dear life.

"Easy now," I soothed, patting the horse's muzzle to ease it along. I could see a wider path in the distance. We only had to get as far as the next peak and we'd be in the clear. I hoped we wouldn't have any run-ins with goblins; we traveled the highest path and, as far as I knew, goblins had their traps where travelers were more likely to go in the lower regions of the mountains. The air was thinner up here, and Kili and I struggled to breathe. I was growing more and more lightheaded, which was unusual for me. I had been born and raised in the mountains of Ered Luin without ever a problem.

I had been too eager to follow the company. Had I known what would transpire that night, I would have given anything to be safely back in Rivendell.

Yup. He left Rivendell with stubborn little brother Kili in tow, who, may I reiterate, still has a broken arm and can't really walk that well.

Will this spell disaster for the two out in the wilderness?

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