Chapter 9

Bridges

6 Days after the previous chapter

Puckett residence

00:00 AM

Nobody likes to be alone and Samantha Puckett knew that all too well, she was once again sleepless and home alone as her mother had gone out with Mike again. Though happy that her mother hadn't switched men in what was to be two weeks, Sam didn't like the loneliness that griped her soul. She would tell herself from time to time that she wasn't alone but now more than ever it was getting harder to swallow that lie, usually hanging out with Carly and Freddie would somewhat reassure her that she wasn't indeed alone but with things the way they are now it was hard to convince herself. Freddie and Carly were together now and it felt as if she were a third wheel every time she was around them. It seemed the only time things were somewhat normal was when they got together to think up ideas for the next iCarly web cast but even then things weren't as they were as Freddie wasn't around anymore. Freddie had given them some half ass excuse of needing some space from his mother, prompting the move to his aunt's house? , Sam wasn't sure as she had been half listening. Freddie had named Gibby his replacement as their tech guy as he wouldn't be able to go to Bushwell plaza until he resolved things with his mother; thinking back to the moment he told them brought a small smile to Sam's face as she recalled the look on Carly's face. Though unhappy with Freddie's departure herself, even though she would never admit that to Freddie's face, she did find some hope in that some distance between Carly and Freddie would make things go back to the way they were.

Sam's inner musings were interrupted by the rustling and thuds from down stairs. Slowly extracting herself from her bed she preceded to grab a baseball bat from the corner of her room and making her way out of the room to check out the rest of the house. Pausing at the top of the stairs Sam let out an irritated sigh as she watched her mother stumble around but kept upright by Mike, fixing up her best glare she stood aside as Mike gave her an apologetic smile and carried Pam to her bedroom. With a huff Sam retreated to her room and returned the bat at its position at the corner of the room, setting herself down on the bed facing the door Sam shrugged of the pants she had put on in haste to cut off any criminal activity in the house. Left in a large t-shirt Sam was about to enter her bed when a slight knock caused her to pause.

"H –hey" Mike stuttered as his eyes fell on Sam before averting his eyes to the floor

"Problem?" Sam asked nonchalantly

"N-no I just wanted to apologize if we woke you, your mom just a bit much to drink"

"When does she have a little to drink" Sam muttered

"Right…well goodnight" Mike said awkwardly clearly uncomfortable with Sam's state of undress

"Kill the lights would you"

"Sure"

With that Mike backed out of the room to hear Pam calling his name, clearly wanting to end the night with a few moments of euphoria, looking down at the bulge that had already formed in his pants Mike sighed and slowly made his way to Pam's bedroom, where a pair of parted legs waited for him.

Stewart residence

00:07AM

Everything was unfamiliar even the ceiling he now stared at every night was unfamiliar; the bed he lay on was too soft unlike his own which was a perfect combination between firmness and comfort-ability. A small smile appeared on Freddie's face as he recalled the fuss his mother had made when they were picking out his bed years ago, concerned on how it would affect his back. In the past he hadn't seen what the big deal was but now that he found it hard to fall asleep in this bed he realized how much he missed his old bed and his mother. His small smile fell replaced by a look of sadness, change had been in the air ever since he had been forced to depart from his mother, Freddie recalled after leaving Bushwell plaza the ride to Ellen's house was endured in a thick silence as neither of the cars occupants spoke a word and it was only when they parked in her driveway that Ellen seemed to come up with something to say. Freddie guessed she had been thinking on how to handle the situation she seemed to have stumbled into, she had told him no word of what had happened would breathed to anyone including Carly and Sam if he wanted to be reunited with his mother, she seemed to sympathize with him when he silently accepted her terms knowing he had no choice in the matter and tried to reassure him that "things would get better in time" and that had been six days ago. Sitting up on his bed Freddie doubted that. Bringing his phone to his face Freddie checked the time to find it was some minutes after midnight, he had been continuously plagued by nightmares switching between scenes of him and his mother in the throes of passion to Ellen's face marked with pure disgust and with that came the men with no faces dragging his mother away from him and no matter how hard he ran he never managed to catch up to them. Sighing as he recalled the dream Freddie swung the blankets off him and let his feet touch the cold floor, in his boxers and a t-shirt Freddie walked out of the guest bedroom which was now his temporary room and made his way to the kitchen.

The entire house was extremely quiet and Freddie guessed that the rest of the house occupants were enjoying a fruitful slumber, getting a glass from the side of the sink Freddie filled it with water and gulped down a fair amount from the glass before deciding it was enough and depositing the glass into the sink. This had become somewhat of a routine through out the days he'd been living here; he'd wake up from the nightmares, come down for a glass of water and go back to bed and reflected on the recent events until it became too much to think about or sleep finally reclaimed him only to spit him out just a few minutes before his alarm went off. Freddie continued the routine and went back to bed and waited for morning to come, and it would be another day of trying to claim some form of solitude.

Ridgeway high

15:35 PM

"So you ready to go?"

Freddie's eyes snapped away from Carly's retreating form to Malika who wore a cheerful smile. 'Too cheerful' Freddie thought bitterly. He guessed Malika could feel his exuding a bad mood because her smile started to waver. Carly didn't accept his reason for not coming over to her apartment and had stormed off without letting him figure out a better lie to feed her, when the truth was that he was forbidden to go anywhere near Bushwell plaza which was one of the terms of the agreement he and his mother had agreed to. Freddie had guessed today wouldn't be his best day when he woke up from another nightmare an hour after going back to sleep. 'I'll apologize later' Freddie thought finally.

"Freddie?" Malika called out to a dazed Freddie snapping her fingers in front of his face

"Uhm yeah sorry just a little distracted, what's up?"

"Are you ready to go?"

"Go?"

"To the groovy smoothie remember?"

"Uhm sure, let's get going" Freddie said uncertainly sounding put off, but either Malika didn't seem to notice or didn't care.

They were a few feet from the door when Malika caught a sneer directed at her by Shannon Mitchell and a group of other girls she never bothered to remember, ignoring the looks Malika continued to walk beside Freddie with a nonchalant smile.

Groovy Smoothie

16:28PM

Malika watched Freddie intently as he talked about what technologies are used in iCarly; she hadn't a single clue as to what was what but was content being here with him without any distraction. She was glad the only time Carly was mentioned was only when they were referring to iCarly, Malika had seen the kiss he shared with Carly a week ago but she wasn't surprised only envious. Though she had a crush on Freddie she would settle for being his friend but if he broke up with Carly she had no quarrels with taking him for herself.

"So I never asked but how do you do the whole vanishing and appearing out of thin air thing" Freddie said changing the subject before he bored her to death.

"A good magician -never reveals her tricks" she said simultaneously with Freddie who had picked up where she was going with it.

"No exceptions" he asked with a fake pout

"We'll maybe if we were betrothed I could tell you, so it's up to you how much you'd like to know" she teased

"Hmmm…very tempting but I'll have to pass" Freddie said with a genuine smile. Never imagining he could keep a conversation going with Malika.

"So what's been keeping you up at night?" she questioned noting his slightly bloodshot eyes

"Stuff" he replied with a far away look in his eyes

"You want to talk about this stuff?" she said as she sucked on her Strawberry flavored smoothie keeping eye contact with him.

"Nah that's ok I'll be fine don't worry about it" Freddie said taking his eyes of her and reading the groovy smoothie logo on his smoothie

"Who said I was worried?" she asked masking a smile

"I…ah…what I mea-" Freddie stopped talking and smiled when he heard giggling

"Sorry I just couldn't resist" she said getting control of her giggles

"Hmmm…" Freddie mused out loud

"What?" she asked

"Its nothing…it's just I never figured you to be…Uhm fun" Freddie said sheepishly

"Well usually I was too nervous to interact normally" she said her cheeks turning slightly red

"What made you so nervous" Freddie asked curiously?

"Y-…"

Malika was cut off as a figure loomed over the two, Looking up she caught the glare of one Carly Shay. Behind Carly stood two other girls none of which were Sam, Malika recognized them seeing them earlier at school as she and Freddie exited the school. She had seen them seated on a table deeper into the Groovy smoothie but thought nothing of it until now; and with that she knew they must have contacted Carly and told her what they had seen without the entirety of the story. Looking over at Freddie who had the deer caught in the headlights look she assumed he hadn't told her about their…she didn't even know what to call what they were doing, they were hanging out right?. Before either she or Freddie could speak Carly slapped Freddie and stormed off leaving behind her entourage to glare judgingly at she and Freddie, Freddie stared after Carly contemplating weather to leave or finish their….

"Go after her" she told Freddie who didn't need telling twice as he ran after Carly leaving Malika in an uncomfortable stand still with the entourage.

XXXX

Running after Carly had seemed easier in theory but that didn't prove to be the case as Freddie entered Bushwell plaza. Panting Freddie continued up the stairs as the elevator seemed to be on the top floor. Reaching the Shay apartment door Freddie drew in a few ragged breaths as he tried to collect himself before knocking. Knocking on the door Spencer answered with a look of utter confusion.

"Hey Spence" Freddie greeted hands on his knees breathing hard

"Hey Freddie you know what's up with Carly?"

"Where is she" he asked

"Upstairs in her room but-" Spencer was cut off as Freddie ran past him and up the stairs muttering that he'll explain later and to let him handle it.

Reaching her room Freddie steadied himself before entering, he entered to find Carly pacing around the room and shouting at someone on her phone. She turned to look at him with slightly puffy red rimmed eyes, Carly snarled at Freddie throwing her phone straight at him; Freddie side stepped and avoided phone sending it shattering against the door, and he was fairly sure he heard Sam voice as it flew past him.

"Carly..." Freddie said in a calm voice trying to calm her down

"What the fuck do you want Freddie!"

"Just let me explain I-…"

"You what Freddie…" Carly snapped "I should have known you were like every guy" she said her voice cracking

"Just let me explain!" Freddie snapped at her his own frustration growing with her rant

"Why? All I've wanted to do is be with you these past days and you've been what? Fucking Malika?!"

"I haven't been fucking anyone damn it, we were just hanging out, and you know why I couldn't come over to the plaza"

"Oh yeah I remember, what was it you said? Oh yeah you said you needed some space from your mommy" Carly mocked

"You don't get it-" Freddie was about to go on but Carly cut him off

"You know we didn't even have to come back here we could have gone to groovy smoothie but no! You didn't even ask me out to groovy smoothie" Carly jabbed at him her voice slightly in its normal pitch

"What was it Freddie? What I'm not good enough for you now that you've had your dick in me" she said her voice low and tears running down her face.

"No! Why would you say that? You know I'm not like that!" Freddie said walking across the room and grabbing her by the arm

"I thought I knew you Freddie, but with the way you've been acting I know that I don't know you that well" She yelled at him yanking her arm away from his grasps

"So tell me Freddie who else have you been fucking? Hmm…" Carly said venomously a sick smile making it way to her face

"I haven't been fucking anyone, I told you; you were my first" Freddie said his voice shaken slightly

"Cut the crap Freddie, what? Was mommy giving you fuck lessons just like everything else; one has to wonder what happens during all those tick baths" Carly said letting out vindictive laughter.

Freddie felt his entire body grow cold as she uttered those words, tears were now threatening to spill from his eyes as he looked on at Carly who was smiling at his reaction. With all the screaming the pair didn't notice Spencer appear at the door.

"Screw you" Freddie said His voice dangerously low

"Oh! Did I hit a soft spot with mommy?" She said matching his tone

"You know what, your right you're not good enough for me and you know what? You were a lousy fuck and I'll take my chances with Malika than fuck y-…"

*Smack*

*Crash*

Freddie wasn't able to finish his sentence as Spencer's fist connected with his jaw, before Freddie could get his bearings Spencer was picking him off the floor and dragging him out of the room. Freddie was still disorientated as Spencer continued to drag him without any trouble down the stairs and into the living room, Freddie could hear faint sounds of Carly screaming at someone in the background but most of his hearing might as well have been listening to white noise, but that was drowned out by Spencer's face coming into view and giving him a very real threat to stay away from Carly. Spencer dragged Freddie out into the hallway and slammed their apartment door closed, leaving Freddie laying on his back staring at the ceiling in a daze.

Freddie got his bearing after a few minutes of senseless gazing and listening to the shouts coming from the shay apartment. Fingering his mouth before bringing his finger into his field of vision Freddie sighed as it was stained with blood. With the help of his apartment door handle he got to his feet. Freddie gave out a groan as he felt the aches and pains on his back from being dragged down the stairs. Looking back at the Shay apartment Freddie gave out a sigh, not only had he messed up his life but he had now made Carly cry. Making his way to the elevator Freddie contemplated as to what his next move was. He could apologize to Carly and he was sure that if he explained the entire situation later she would realize how stupid the entire argument was and take him back but Freddie wasn't sure he wanted that. He didn't deserve Carly he was dirt and had done enough damage in her life so maybe he should just let her be mad at him, because god knows he wouldn't be able to live with himself if he dragged her into his shitty life. Carly deserved to be happy but if she stayed with him he would only bring her suffering, so Freddie vowed to put his selfish desires aside for her and stay away from Carly that way even Spencer would get what he wanted.

Shay apartment

17:50 PM

"Y…yo… you've been having sex?" Spencer asked disbelievingly at his sister

"That's none of your business" she snapped at him making her way back upstairs

"What do you mean it's not my business, I'm in charge of this apartment and you so whatever you do is my business" Spencer snapped running after her.

"You're not the boss of me and you're not Dad!" Carly screamed irrationally and slammed her bedroom door shut before locking it.

Spencer stood momentarily still taken aback by Carly's outburst, they'd had arguments before but she'd never said that to him and though he only ever tried to be her older brother it still somewhat hurt. Regaining his bearings he walked over to Carly's door and tried the door to find it locked and could hear slight sounds of sniffling emanating from within. Feeling his own temper cool down Spencer knew a screaming competition wouldn't solve anything and slowly slid to the floor his back to Carly's door.

"Carls…I really don't know what's going on and that scares me, you're my little sister and I'm always trying to protect you and when I saw you crying and Freddie screaming at you… and all that talk of sex… I just lost my temper. I'm sorry for yelling at you but we still have to talk… I'll be waiting for you when you're ready to talk" Spencer finished getting up off the floor and making his way down stairs hoping he hadn't misjudged the situation and hurt Freddie for no reason.

Puckett residence

17:25 PM

Sam sat motionless and silently thinking 'what just happened', she just got a call from Carly screaming something about Freddie and Malika but as Sam was about to get a word in, the line went dead with a crash. Sam flipped her phone shut breaking out of her trance, getting up off the couch Sam grabbed her jacket and was about to head for Carly's apartment when a voice stopped her progress.

"Going somewhere?" Pam asked from the top of the stairs

"Yeah, I have to get to carly's-"

"No" Pam said cutting Sam off

"What?"

"You heard me I said no, you're not going anywhere"

"B- What...W…why?" Sam stuttered incredulously

"Mike's coming over tonight and I thought we might fix up the place"

"He's your boyfriend, why don't you do it yourself"

Pam flinched as Sam referred to Mike as her boyfriend "I could but I'd rather do it with my little girl"

"I'm not your little girl, haven't been for a while, I know you're usually too drunk to notice but I've grown up"

"Okay I guess I deserve that but your still not aloud to leave, its getting late and I don't want you out after dark"

"You have bad timing when you decide to act like a mother" Sam said brushing past Pam and making her way to her room

"Sam-" Pam tried to call after her but she had already disappeared into her room

Pam sighed and thought of how much she needed a drink, today was one of those days when she decided not to have a drink but right now it was very tempting. She had planned to have dinner with Sam tonight just like old times when there were four plates to be set on the table but it wasn't like old times, it was just Sam and her now and she had to try make the best of that. Mike wasn't coming over tonight she had just used that as a cover to get Sam to stay, as to why she couldn't just tell her the truth Pam wasn't sure. Pam gave a fleeting glance at the fridge where she could grab herself a nice cold beer but climbed up the stairs to talk to Sam instead.

Seattle Medical Center

18:40 PM

Marissa's hands clenched and unclenched around the steering wheel as she tried to block herself from reality but no matter how much she tried Freddie's face racked with tears flashed in her mind. Letting out a choked sob Marissa didn't know how she was going to face Freddie after this, in her weakness to face reality she had damaged their lives and wasn't sure if she should be allowed to see him again. She could almost laugh at the irony of how she always tried to protect Freddie yet it was her he needed protecting from. During the days without Freddie's presence she had been going through the motions and trying to put off facing the situation she had caused but she couldn't avoid it forever. Ellen hadn't talked to her since coming back the day after the incident to collect Freddie's clothes, until today that is. Though she didn't say much but handed her the psychiatrist's card and said she would be expected. Tomorrow would be her first session with one "Dr Silberman", she didn't know this doctor Silberman and even though Ellen claimed he was a good friend of hers, Marissa wondered if he really could be trusted, but that didn't matter either way; the situation was well out of her hands to control. After minutes of senseless pondering Marissa slipped her keys into the ignition and twisted, feeling her small VW Beetle come alive Marissa could only hang her head in shame as she caught Ellen's fleeting glance as she pulled out of the lot and drove away. Slipping the car into drive Marissa slowly pulled out of the lot making her way home. 'Home; can I even call it that when he's not there'.

XXX

The drive home was dull and saddening, this being her routine during the days past without Freddie. Feeling slightly detached Marissa made her way to the elevator before selecting her floor and letting the autonomous mechanism carry her to her floor. Marissa was in a dazed state as she gazed aimlessly at the elevator lighting, she continued to gaze upward as the elevator reached her floor and didn't know it had come to a stop until it alerted her with a ding. Broken from her thoughts Marissa stepped out of the elevator and prepared her keys for entry into her apartment. Marissa inserted her keys and unlocked the door but paused as she reached for the handle. A Touch of smeared crimson on the door knob caught her attention; it hadn't been there this morning for she would have seen it then. Even with all that was happening around her, she still couldn't help her habits of keeping everything as hygienic as possible. 'Who knows what Freddie could catch-' she caught her thoughts before they overwhelmed her as she remembered that he wasn't here anymore. Slipping a hand into her purse she brought out a handkerchief which she used to grip the door knob and let herself into her apartment, as for where or how the blood had come from Marissa didn't care, all she wanted to do now was get into her bed and maybe fall asleep without having to shed silent tears to call Morpheus. She hadn't eaten since she had left the apartment in the morning but she didn't care she just wanted to forget for few hours before having to face the psychiatrist whose cold clinical eyes would analyze and judge her. Slipping into her bedroom she didn't even bother to switch on the lights but made straight for her bed, entering the covers she didn't bother changing into her night clothing but simply stripped off her skirt and maneuvered her bra off leaving her in a shirt and panties. Feeling her soft pillow against her face brought Marissa slight comfort. Bringing her arms around it Marissa hugged it with a small smile wishing it were Freddie.

Marissa was about to slip out of consciousness when Freddie's face flashed in her mind and her eyes snapped open; feeling her thoughts about Freddie returning Marissa shut her eyes and tried to forget through reliving the days when Freddie's father was still alive. She could almost feel his touch as she remembered the times they were in the throes of passion. Feeling herself getting aroused Marissa squeezed her legs tightly together but couldn't help herself as she let her hand travel down into her panties and gave her clit a little rub. Reliving the last time she shared a bed with Freddie's father Marissa slid a finger into her wet self and let out a moan, desperate to escape thinking about Freddie Marissa continuously fingered herself on her memory of Freddie's father. Feeling herself about to come Marissa could almost taste Freddie's father, just as she was about to go over the edge Freddie's fathers face contorted and morphed into Freddie's face before uttering the words he had left with her the last time she had seen him "I love you mom". And with that Marissa felt Euphoria wash over as she came hard watching Freddie's smiling face fade from her vision.

"I'm so sorry Freddie" she muttered as tears slid down her face and once again let her tears guide her to sleep

Stewart Residence

19:20 PM

Ellen smiled as she entered her house to be welcomed by the scent of a home cooked meal, she felt tiered mentally and wasn't planning on cooking tonight but thought they'd other in. she followed the scent into the kitchen where she found two teenagers with their back to her inspecting whatever they had cooking at the stove. Giving out a cough Ellen watched as Freddie and Sarah jumped slightly and turned to face her.

"So what are you two up to" she asked pleasantly

"I hope you don't mind Mrs. Stewart but I thought I'd cook today, you looked tiered most of the days when you came back from work" Freddie said sheepishly

"And he's not such a bad cook too mom" Sarah said dipping her index finger into the pot and licking it seductively as she looked over at Freddie

"No, of course I don't mind Freddie; I wasn't really planning on cooking today so I should thank you for cooking"

"It's not a problem, I used to cook for my mom when she was having a rough week" He said the last part on a sad note

"That's sweet of you Freddie" Sarah commented

"Yes Freddie very sweet of you, so what are we having and when will it be ready?" Ellen asked quickly changing the subject

"We're having chicken, gravy and some mashed potatoes and it should be ready any moment now"

"Great I'm starving, I'll just go change-…Freddie what happened to your face" she said finally noting the bruise on his face

"Oh that, its' nothing I wasn't watching where I was going and ran into a locker"

"I'll go set the plates" Sarah announced walking out of the kitchen plates in hand

"Well watch where our going next time, purple isn't a nice color on you" Ellen said letting it drop for now

Ellen made her way up the stairs to get ready for dinner, her mind though still on the bruise on Freddie's face. She didn't want to interrogate him about it but wasn't sure how else to find out how he got it, doubting that he got it form a run in with a simple locker. Ellen shook her head as if to clear her mind of her thoughts before returning down stairs where she found Freddie had dished out their meals and were waiting on her. She watched was surprised to find her daughter and son eating at the same table as she hadn't been able to get them to eat as a family in a long time. Letting out a sigh Ellen smiled as she thought that she could get used to this.

T.B.C

Author's notes: Reviews are always welcome, and for any mistakes let me know and I'll fix em right up.

3ohE