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BPOV
"My boys have taken after their Mom." I said laughing.
"Yeah well let's see what they in store for us tomorrow." Em laughed.
"Come on Tink's get your drunk on." Tiny yelled.
"I am I have had double what you have had you pussy." I said giggling.
"Oh fuck no sex you two we don't want to hear it." Jazz said.
"Shut up Jazz" Edward said.
"So what are the plans for tomorrow boys?" I asked them.
"Um tomorrow we are fishing?" James said.
"I call bullshit." I said looking at them.
"OK tomorrow we go to the Theme Park." Ben said.
"Fuck I'm glad I came camping." I said to them laughing.
We all chatted for hours everyone was pretty drunk except for Edward and everyone slowly went to bed. I changed and crawled into bed and fell asleep straight away.
~~~%~~~
"Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh what the fuck." Ben screamed.
"James you pissed the bed." Ben yelled.
OMG what have my boys done. I could hear Edward chuckling videoing and the 3 boys giggling in the tent.
"MASEN, MAX, TOM" James yelled and the boys jumped in bed with us giggling.
"What did you do boys?" I asked.
"Put Uncle James hand in water." Max said giggling.
"WHAT THE FUCK" Em yelled.
"MASEN, MAX, TOM" EM yelled. I looked at Max.
"We covered him in shaving cream boobs and drew on his face with this." he said showing me a huge permanent marker.
"OH SHIT" Pauley yelled. I looked at Tom.
"We put honey all over him and feathers." Tom said giggling.
"MASEN, MAX, TOM" Tiny yelled. I looked at Masen.
"We used dads shaver and shaved some hair off and put chocolate syrup on him and spaghetti hair." he said giggling.
"WHAT THE FUCK THOSE KIDS ARE DEAD." Jason yelled. I looked at Max and raised an eyebrow at him.
"We taped him down to his bed with the thick black tape and drew on his face." Max said. I was giggling with the boys I couldn't help it Edward was laughing videoing the boys telling me.
"HOLY SHIT WHAT THE FUCK." Mitch yelled. I looked at Tom and raised an eyebrow at him.
"We put black shoe polish over his face and hands and put that stuff Aunty Rose put in her hair to make it go white." Tom said.
"What you put peroxide in his hair?" I said looking at Edward laughing.
"BOYS" Jazz yelled. I looked at Masen and raised an eyebrow at him.
"We taped his head to the bed and his arms and legs to each end of the fold out bed." Masen said chuckling high fiving us all.
"CHARLOTTE IS GONNA KILL ME...BOYS." Chris yelled. I looked at Max.
"We" he giggled "We shaved all the hair of here" he said pointing to his chest "and here" he said pointing to his eyebrows "and drew new ones for him and a moustache. Dad drew boobs as well." he giggled high fiving his brothers, dad and me.
"I CANT MOVE!" Jason yelled sending us all into fits.
"ME EITHER!" Jazz yelled.
"IM GONNA GET THEM THREE!" Seth yelled. I looked at them and raised an eyebrow at Tom.
"We put Uncle Seth's hand in water and we drew on his body Seth loves Rose." they said giggling.
"EVIL SPAWN MAX TOM MASEN!" Rob yelled I looked at Masen.
"We drew on his face and put red lips on him." he said. OMG he means red lip stick "Oh and we put string outside the tent so he will fall over mommy." he said giggling.
"You mean all their tents." Max said giggling.
"WHAT THE FUCK!" Sam yelled I looked at the boys.
"Chocolate syrup and sprinkles and we filled his shoes up with pudding." Max said giggling.
"MASEN, MAX AND TOM!" Ben yelled.
"We drew on his face and put chocolate syrup in his boots." Tom giggled.
"OMG WHAT HAS TINK TAUGHT THOSE BOYS!" Pete yelled.
"Aunt Rose's hair stuff and we made a Mohawk and drew on him." Masen said giggling.
"OMG RILEY WHAT HAVE THEY DONE TO YOU!" Pete yelled.
"THE 3 OF THEM HAVE TAPED ME TO THE FUCKEN BED AND POURED CHOCLATE SYRUP IN MY PANTS!" he yelled. That was it we all were in fits of laughter.
"OMG I LOVE THOSE KIDS!" Tiny yelled.
I got up and walked outside and grabbed my chair and camera and waited for them to come out of their tents. Max, Edward, Masen and Tom walked out and ran and threw fart bombs in the tents then ran back over to me high fiving me and I couldn't believe what they got up to last night.
"OMG WHAT IS THAT!" Tiny yelled flying out the tent and fell over the string, then Em, Pete, James, Rob, Seth, Chris, Sam, Ben, Mitch and Pauley all falling over and laughing.
"FOR GOD SAKE HELP ME IT STINKS LIKE SHIT IN HERE!" Jason yelled sending everyone into fits of laughter.
"I'M GOING TO BE SICK!" Jazz yelled.
"OMG DONT LAUGH HELP US!" Riley yelled.
I went into the tent and took video of what my boys had done and laughed my ass off and walked back out watching where the string line was.
"TINKS GET YOU ASS BACK HERE!" Bond yelled.
"SORRY YOU HAVE TO GET OUT YOURSELF. I'M NOT RUINING MY KIDS FUN REMEMBER I'M NOT HERE!" I said yelling and the boys high fived me.
"OK boys go blow your horns." Edward laughed. The three of them ran and grabbed them and blew the air horns in their tents.
"Holy shit" Jazz yelled.
"FUCK" Bond yelled.
"BOYS" Riley yelled.
Then they let one rip and sprayed the Ass in a Can in there and ran back. All the uncles were high fiving them.
"OH fuck man I'm gonna be sick." Jazz said and started dry wrenching.
"OMG" Jason said dry wrenching.
All as we could hear was Riley dry wrenching in the tent.
The guys were all on the ground laughing there ass off at the three that were stuck. The kids were getting high fives and giggling. I walked over grabbed a knife and went and cut them lose. I walked out and was dry wrenching myself.
They all ran out and went flying when they got up the boys were all hiding Tom was in Tiny's arms, Max was in Edward's and Masen was in Rob's they were scared there uncles were pissed at them. Jazz must have sensed it and went and high fived them, then Bond but Riley of course just sulked.
"I tell you what you boys are good." Tiny laughed making everyone laugh as well.
"You helped them Edward didn't you?" Sam said.
"Yeah everything they did they planned before they got here. I just helped them with a couple and filmed them." Edward said laughing.
"Doc glad you brought that shower." Tiny said walking over to it with a towel.
Masen, Max and Tom started giggling and then we heard Tiny scream. I looked at the boys and they said "Blue dye" making everyone laugh. Tiny came stomping out of the shower bright blue like a blues loo blue omg my kids are awesome.
"OMG Tiny" the guys all cracked up.
"Boys is that it, you have no more surprises?" I asked looking at them.
They all put their hand behind their backs and looked at me. I knew they had their fingers crossed.
"No" Mase said.
"No" Max said.
"No" Tom said giggling.
"OK go and get changed for breakfast." I said watching them run off.
"Edward what else have they done?" I asked he zipped his lips shut and walked off.
"I can't believe it look at me Tinks." Chris said laughing.
"Charlotte won't be to mad will she Chris?" I asked.
"No she was laughing when I called her before." he said looking at me.
I waited and went in and dressed brushed my teeth and got the boys to do these as well. Edward came in changed and brushed his teeth and started chuckling.
"What have you done?" I asked them.
"Wait for it love." he said high fiving the boys.
Grabbing the video camera and walking out with it and I saw him hide behind Pauley's vehicle with the camera the boys all went and stood with their dad and put ear muffs on. I looked at Edward and he motioned for me to cover my ears as well.
I saw Edward give the camera to Masen and ran and light something. I saw all the boys walking up from the creek and then I heard all the crackers going off Bond hit the deck and drew his weapon and the boys all screamed, I burst out laughing and they were all laughing. Masen, Max, Tom and Edward were all high fiving each other. Bond got up and looked over at me shaking his head and laughing.
"OMG I need clean undies." Tiny said.
"Me too man." Rob said to him laughing.
"Nah man I'm serious." Tiny said. Rob wrinkled his nose and walked away laughing at Tiny walking funny.
All the boys were laughing at James screaming like a girl and his face just thinking about it makes me crack up laughing again.
We all cooked breakfast and laughed about the morning so far I still had tears rolling down my face from Tiny shitting himself.
"It was just a little bit of poo Tink's." he said laughing making us all laugh.
"Right, boys is that really all?" I asked looking at them.
"Boy's come here." Edward yelled to them.
"OH FUCK" Tiny said looking at me.
"Do you know what they are up to Tink's" Tiny asked.
"No they won't tell me but I know they have been planning stuff for weeks. Edward took the boys to some store in Seattle and they bought everything." I said looking at the boys.
"Well we aren't going to the theme park because none of us are going looking like this. I just hope we survive today." Em said laughing.
"So Bond I see you still have a quick draw." I said laughing making all the boys laugh.
"Yeah Tink's" he said cuddling me. Then he walked back and sat in his seat all the boys were all sitting and laughing about the boys pranks.
"MOM" Masen yelled.
"Yeah buddy" I said walking over to him.
"Mom can you please go in the tent for awhile." he whispered.
"OK Masen I will go and lay down." I said looking at him and walking to the tent.
I wonder what they are up to.
"READY AIM FIRE" I heard Masen yell and then I heard all the uncles yelling and screaming at them I stuck my head out of the tent and the boys were throwing water bombs but they were filled with die omg. Their uncles were bright pink, yellow, green, blue, orange and green. But the guys couldn't run because they had stuck there arses to the seats with something. OMG my kids are evil I laughed as a water bomb splattered on Riley's face. I zipped the tent up and lay down then I heard the tent zip go and Masen, Max and Tom run in and hopped on the bed.
"Uncle Riley is going to get us Mommy he cussed and went to smack me" Masen said looking at me. I gasped no one touches my kids.
I could hear Riley going off at Edward and Edward telling him to shut up they are just having fun and not to call his kids that and if he ever raised a hand at his kids again. All the uncles were arguing now with Riley telling him not to be a girl and if he couldn't handle the pranks to fuck off. I heard Tiny going off telling Riley he would end him. The kids just looked at me and cuddled into me cringing on the bed.
"You know what Riley don't worry I will pack up and take Bella and the boys to the Mansion now." he yelled.
"Come on boys come help dad pack everything up." Edward yelled to them.
I got up and walked out and bite my bottom lip at the sight of all the uncles. I saw Edward taking down the shower and packing everything up. I told the boys to pack their bags we were going to the Mansion. They started packing and putting things in the car I cleaned and packed the whole inside of the tent and collected everything from outside. Edward put the tent down and stuffed it in the back of the BMW SUV.
"Hop in guys." Edward said.
I looked at all the guys and tears fell down my face I was mortified that Riley had carried on and spoke to my kids like that. I saw all of the uncles packing up as well.
"Riley you aren't welcome in my home or near my kids ever again." Edward said getting in the SUV and driving off.
We all sat there in silence not game enough to say anything I just looked out the window because I was crying I wiped my tears away. I looked in the back and seen my boy's faces I took my belt off and jumped in the back and comforted them.
"We're sorry mommy." Masen said crying.
"Mase don't cry buddy you did nothing wrong." I told him wiping his tears away.
The three of them eventually fell asleep and I climbed over and sat back in my seat.
"Edward are you ok?" I asked.
"No not really love." he said looking at me for a second before looking back at the road ahead.
"Can you pull over please?" I asked him.
He pulled over and I got out and went to the back of the SUV sat on the side of the road and bawled my eyes out. Edward got out and walked around to me and sat next to me putting his arm around me cuddling me.
I heard a car come and saw it was one of the work ones Jason and Rob got out and came over to us.
"Are you ok?" they asked.
"Yeah "I said crying.
"How are the boys?" Jason asked.
"They cried them self's to sleep." I said looking at Bond and Rob.
"That asshole" Bond said.
"What a prick" Rob said.
"Ah Tinks, Tiny gave Riley a black eye and busted his lip." Bond said looking at us
"Yeah well if my boys weren't there I would have too." Edward said looking at them.
I heard car doors and looked up to see Pete, Jazz, Em, Ben, James, Tiny, Seth, Pauley, Sam, Chris and Mitch.
"Are you guys alright?" Em asked.
"Yeah man, were ok. It's just my boys they think they have done something bad and cried themselves to sleep." Edward told them. "They have been planning all those pranks for a month they have a book with them all in that they did." Edward said opening the back and grabbing it and showing them
"Edward we found it funny we even planned a few to get the kids back and what Riley did I will never forgive him." Tiny said.
"Come on guys lets go before the boys wake up." I said looking at them.
They all gave me a kiss and a hug and told Edward they weren't angry. 2 hours later we pulled up at the Mansion and walked in. Marie grabbed me and walked me out side.
"I have had it with him I asked him for a divorce. We have been living in separate rooms for 8 months." she said crying.
"Oh Ree" I said hugging her. I knew they were having problems she had been staying on and off at our house for months.
"Bella am I still welcome?" she asked sobbing.
"Of course you are honey." I said hugging her. I led her inside and up to her room and lay with her until she sobbed herself to sleep.
I walked down stairs and everyone had showered and changed so I went and showered and changed as well. I went and found my kids and hugged and kissed them all and listened to the girls telling me what they had done. I looked over to see Masen in his Dad's arms sobbing. I looked at Edward and he was pissed off so it had to do with Riley.
"Come on buddy Uncle Riley didn't mean to call you that." Edward said trying to comfort him.
"Hey Masen show you auntie's what.." Bond stopped and looked at Masen in his dad's arms sobbing. Bond looked over at me and then back at Masen.
"Masen want to come with me for a minute buddy?" he asked.
Masen put his arms out to Bond and he grabbed him and took him over to all the uncles and they had a chat with him. Edward looked at me and went outside then I heard his car start and he peeled off. I looked at the boys and a few of them took off after Edward.
Masen was showing his Uncles' his book and Edward had already apologized to Charlotte and Mary for shaving Chris's eyebrows and Tiny's head. They just laughed him off and said they found it hilarious that the boys could come up with everything and that when they had called them to tell them this morning they haven't laughed so much at their husbands in ages.
The Uncles' eventually got Masen to put the video on. The girls were in fits and so where the boys at everything until it showed what Riley did and all the girls gasped when they seen it. I looked at Masen, Max and Tom and Masen jumped up and ran to his room. I went to go after him but Bond and Rob stopped me.
I grabbed my mobile and called Edward.
"Hello" he said.
"Babe, come back whatever you are going to do forget about it your boys need you."
"OK love I'm on my way back now." he said.
"I love you Edward."
"I love you too Bella."
"I will see you soon babe."
"Yeah love" he said hanging up.
I walked back inside and Masen came running up and jumped in my arms and kissed me.
"Mommy"
"Yeah Masen"
"I'm sorry Uncle Riley and daddy had a fight." he said looking at me.
"Masen you don't have to be sorry buddy." I said looking at my son.
"But it was because of Max, Tom and me." he said playing with my hair.
"No it was because your uncle cussed in front of you 3 boys and he is lucky mommy never washed his mouth out with soap." I said looking at Masen wrinkle his nose and I laughed.
"Mommy I love you." he said kissing me.
"I love you to Mase, how about you go and find your brothers and go and play." I told him putting him down.
"OK" he said running off.
I walked into the kitchen where everyone was and looked at them all.
"You ok Tink's?" Tiny asked.
"Yeah I am just, oh I don't know I'm pissed, angry and confused." I said hugging him crying into his chest.
"Bella" Edward said I turned to look at him as he walked over and hugged me and Tiny walked off.
"Love please don't cry." he said kissing my head.
"I am so angry at him Edward. I know the boys were full on all at once but they didn't deserve what Riley said and I have just got Masen to stop crying." I said sniffling.
"I will talk to Masen tonight before he goes to bed just let him play and try to forget about it for a bit ok." Edward said cuddling me.
"Marie told Riley she wants a divorce, she said that was the last straw." I said looking at Edward.
"We all knew that was coming love." Edward told me walking over to get a drink.
"Yeah I know." I said looking at him.
"Where is Ree?" Edward asked.
"She cried herself to sleep, she's in her room." I said looking at him.
"I'll talk to her later." Edward said walking over and wrapping his arms around me.
"Where is everyone?" he asked.
"Bowling with the kids or in the game room." I said looking at him.
"I am going to unpack the car and leave all the camping stuff here." he said kissing my head and walking outside.
~~~%~~~
