Author's note: WOW! Just wow! I left my laptop alone for a few hours and this happens! Thank you so much! Unfortunately, I have some bad news. I'm going on a hiatus for a few weeks as I have a part-time job at my aunt's workplace so... yeah.

Chapter 3

Good Friend: Won't let you do stupid things

Best Friend: Won't let you do stupid things ALONE

No one could argue the fact that one Aomine Daiki was an idiot. Nor could they argue the fact that one Kise Ryota was reckless. So, when the two of them were together, chaos and destruction always followed. And when chaos and destruction followed, one Akashi Seijuro would be there to 'punish those idiots'. So when Kise explained his plan to Aomine and the latter agreeing, this outcome was inevitable.

It all started when Kise was curious about Akashi and wondered if there was anything that Akashi was not good at, anything at all. So with that in mind, he approached Aomine.

"Nee, nee, Aominecchi."

"Hmm?"

"Have you ever wondered about Akashicchi's weakness? I mean, no one is perfect so there must be something that Akashicchi can't do."

"Now that I think about it, does that monster even have a weakness? Okay, that's it! I'm in, Kise."

"I know you would agree, Aominecchi."

Forgetting the fact that no one messes with Akashi, the two idiots started to plan for finding Akashi's weakness. Curiousity killed the cat.

Plan 1: Ask Akashi to play musical instruments.

Kise dragged Akashi to the music room as soon as the basketball club captain went out of his classroom, so the startled red head did not have any chance to protest or kill Kise. When he snapped out of it however, was a different story altogether.

"What is the meaning of this, Ryota?"

Sweating bullets, Kise replied with "K-Kurokocchi said he wanted to hear you play the piano." Akashi raised a delicate eyebrow but said, "Is that so? Let's not keep him waiting then." Kise almost let out a sigh of pure relief but managed to hold it in.

When they arrived at the music room, it turned out that Kuroko was indeed there to hear Akashi play the piano, courtesy of Aomine and his sometimes working brain. Akashi wasted no time to play Fur Elise by Beethoven and managed to capture Kuroko's heart again. Kise was perplexed while Aomine 'tch'ed.

"Akashi, why don't you try playing the violin next?"

"And why should I listen to you, Daiki?"

"I want to hear you play the violin, Sei-kun."

"Of course. Anything for my Tetsuya."

Akashi played Beethoven's Kreutzer Sonata and Kuroko pretty much fell in love with Akashi, again. Kise and Aomine gritted their teeth in anger and disappointment, again. This went for any musical instruments they could think of. Saxophone, clarinets, flute, cello…Anything and everything. In the end, they went with plan number two.

Plan 2: Ask Akashi to sing.

"What are we doing here, Daiki?"

The GOM and Momoi were at a karaoke as Aomine was very, very sure that Akashi sucked at singing. Kise was doubtful but in the end, he relented. They managed to persuade Kuroko to bring Akashi with some crap about wanting to celebrate their victory to which the innocent shadow just nodded to.

"A-Ahaha…I just want to have fun and I suddenly feel like singing, Akashi."

"I see."

Aomine handed the microphone to Akashi and Akashi chose a random song. Aomine and Kise were at the edge of their seats with Aomine desperately hoping Akashi would sound like a dying frog. Their expectations, however, were blown to bits when Akashi's soft, velvety voice managed to make Kuroko swoon when he sang 'Just The Way You Are'. Again, they gritted their teeth but did not give up.

Plan 3: Snowboarding.

"Why snowboarding, Kise?"

"Akashicchi knows how to ride a horse so I think maybe he doesn't know snowboarding. He doesn't seem to be the type to like snow, anyway."

"Where on earth are we going to find snow in the middle of freaking summer?"

"I've got that covered."

By 'covered', Kise meant that he bribed Kuroko with a month worth of vanilla milkshake to persuade Akashi to bring them to Antartica to escape the summer heat. It was not really a lie, though. Kise and Kuroko did not want to deal with the heat. So, the next morning, all the GOM and Momoi were on a plane to Antartica.

Again, when Kise asked Akashi to teach him how to snowboard, Akashi explained it in details and even went as far as to show his incredible skills. Aomine and Kise could only watch in pure amazement.

"Curse you, Akashi. I swear I will find your weakness. Oi, Kise. Let's start the next plan."

Their plans ended up in failure each and every time, to the point that both of them were starting to feel frustrated. The plans ranged from decent…

Plan 34: Ask Akashi to dance.

He completely dominated the dance floor… and Kuroko.

…to completely outrageous and self-harming plans.

Plan 29: Making a bomb.

They were still wondering how Akashi managed to make a bomb out of a bento box of all things.

"Tch…That's it. If he managed to pass the next one, I'm giving up."

"I agree, Aominecchi."

Akashi and Kuroko knew the both of them were up to something but since Kuroko was amused by it and he managed to bed his boyfriend a few times, Akashi decided to ignore the foreboding feeling in his chest. He really should not have done that.

Plan 65: Ask Akashi to cook.

"Tell me why didn't we think of this earlier?"

"You thought that Akashicchi will be good at it too but in the end decided to use it as a last resort."

"Well, it doesn't matter now. Here they come."

Aomine and Kise proposed a cooking competition within their circle of friends and one amused Kuroko Tetsuya decided to join. When Kuroko joined, Akashi was in it by proxy and when Akashi was in it, everyone had to join no matter what. All the boys conveniently forgot Momoi's cooking skills or lack thereof.

All of them mused on what to make until Kise suggested a milkshake. Seeing another opportunity to bed his boyfriend, Akashi immediately agree and any complaints died at their throats. They prepared themselves while Kuroko sat at a special seat prepared by Akashi as he was the judge.

At first, all was going well and surprisingly, Momoi's milkshake were turning out to be edible and would not poison someone. But, when you were talking about the GOM, you knew there was no such thing as peaceful day. Kise was the first to realize what Akashi was creating.

"A-Akashicchi, what was that white blob that you put in inside your blender?"

"Ah…That was tofu, Ryota. Tetsuya needs to drink healthy drinks."

Kise blanched, Aomine turned green (yes, it was visible.), Momoi gasped, Midorima's glasses cracked, Murasakibara wisely decided not to comment while Kuroko turned pale, if it was possible.

"S-Sei-kun, I think it would be better if you just make me a normal milkshake."

"Nonsense, Tetsuya. Nothing but the best for you."

Akashi proceeded to throw random things there and Midorima thought he saw Akashi throwing ginseng. With each ingredient being added, Kuroko's face looked sicker and he desperately hoped for something, anything to happen so he would not have to drink that monstrosity. Fortunately for him, that something being Kise stepping on Murasakibara's snacks.

"I'm sorry, Murassakibaracchi!"

"I will crush you, Ki-chin."

Murasakibara chased Kise around the school's kitchen and Kise accidentally bumped to Momoi. Being startled, Momoi accidentally threw a knife towards Midorima who ducked and that knife was stuck at the back side of Akashi's blender. Said person did not notice and was about to press the switch. Aomine was about to stop him but Murasakibara ran into him and he pressed the switch instead.

As expected, the machine went 'boom' and the mixture was flung in every direction. All of them were splattered with it except for Kuroko who managed to hide behind the chair. Midorima and Momoi swallowed some of it and immediately dropped on the floor. Murasakibara banged his head on the wall after running into Aomine and was unconscious.

"Daiki, Ryota."

The two teens gulped and prayed to every deity that they would survive. Unfortunately, no such thing happened. Akashi lifted his head and gave them an eerie smile.

"I suggest you run."

The day ended in chaos and Murasakibara, Midorima and Momoi had to be sent to the hospital, the latter two suffering from extreme food poisoning. Kuroko sympathized with them but reasoned that better them than him. Who knows what Akashi would do if he was in their position. Eventually, Aomine's and Kise's injuries were healed and the two of them vowed to not do anything like this ever again.