Preponderance

A Criminal Minds Story

She stood just outside of the gate to her house with her arms wrapped around herself. It was cold, fairly windy morning and the skies were dark as small drops of rain splattered unevenly on the side walk. Yet she made no attempts to get indoors. The beautiful house loomed in front of her as she gulped in hesitation. It wasn't the house itself that made her uneasy, it was what she knew wouldn't be waiting for her behind that door.

Like opening that door would make it all real.

Breathing deeply she looked over to see her friend standing silently beside her. Her dark haired friend had made no attempts to rush her or even tell her that it would be okay. She was content to just wait out in the rain with her. And for that JJ was grateful because she didn't want to be told that it would be okay. She knew that it wouldn't be. And she wasn't ready to go into their house. Or…

Her house.

That house.

She just wanted to look at it for awhile. It really was beautiful. They had picked it out together, her and Will. They brought their baby home to that house. He was supposed to grow up there. They were supposed to grow old there.

Closing her eyes exhaled, the wind bit her cheeks and the rain pierced the top of her head as her quivering hand reached for the gate handle. It slowly creaked open as she stepped into her yard knowing Emily would shut the gate behind her. It was still a crime scene. There was a marked car parked out front and tape plastered across the door. But it was still a front yard too.

A soccer ball lay motionless in the wet grass along with several other forgotten toys. As JJ crept closer and closer to the front door she saw a little blond boy running around the yard. He was happy. He was smiling.

"Mommy, let's play!"

JJ sucked in another deep breath as she turned towards the front door. As she turned the handle she found that it was locked. Good thing too, she was glad that they had the decency to make sure that someone couldn't just walk into their house and take stuff… her stuff. Running her hand along the wall she searched for their, her well hidden spare. It was of no use. She couldn't remember where she put it. Her arms fell to her side in defeat as she looked towards Emily who was already combing through her set of keys. Finding the one she needed, she handed it to JJ who put the key in the lock and turned.

She half expected to hear the fast uneven steps of her baby running towards the door ready to leap into her arms as he always did. Sometimes Will would even have to pry Henry off, so that Mommy could get inside.

"Welcome home, Mommy!"

But all that greeted her at the door was the sight of blood. Their blood, in a large puddle on the floor. JJ dug her nails into her palm as she stepped inside. She couldn't help but stare at it as reality hit her quick and fast and any hope that this entire day had been a nightmare crumbled into dust.

"Mommy, I'm scared."

Tearing her eyes away she headed towards the stairs. Past the kitchen. Past the blood. Reaching the bottom she looked up towards the top. Her arms still wrapped around her stomach as she ascended the stairs, one foot in front of the other. The beating of the heart grew faster and faster and her breathing was near erratic as she reached the top. JJ cringed slightly as she neared her destination.

The door was partly open, and the mother could already see part of the inside. Using one arm she pushed the door open the rest of the way. She choked back an abrupt sob as she fully entered the room. Henry's room. It was full of random toys strewn across the floor and dirty clothes in the hamper that would never need to be cleaned or picked up.

Glancing around the room JJ saw what she was looking for. A small simple frame resting undisturbed on the shelf as JJ reached for it. It held a picture of them.

Her, Will, and Henry.

It was Henry's favorite and he insisted that it stay in his room. Taking the picture, JJ suddenly felt very weak and she sunk to Henry's bed. Sitting on something hard. Her heart nearly stopped as she pulled the object out from underneath her. Her breath caught in her throat as she looked at it. It was a book. Their favorite book.

Bedtime for Baby Star.

She even has it memorized. JJ grazed her fingers of the cover before she flipped through the pages. And suddenly it was if she couldn't control her emotions. Every tear, every tragic cry that she had been shoving down her throat before it could escape, let itself out. Squeezing her entire body into a ball she began to shake. Strangled sobs escaped her throat as she clutched the picture and book to her chest. Her heart was tight and seemed close to explosion.

"I'm so sorry," Her anguished wail resonated through the house as she buried her tear streaked face into her son's pillow. Images of her loved ones dashed through her vision as she continued to cry out. Because they were gone. Her husband was gone. And her baby boy was gone.

They were gone.

Emily Prentiss sat outside Henry's door as she listened to the heart wrenching cries of her broken friend. She had grabbed a change of clothes for the blond and was about to head outside to wait when the agonized screech stopped her. Now she had her back to the wall as she too buried her head in her hands and tears threatened to fall. Emily brought her body in closer as the cries became louder. And for the first time in a very long while she prayed…

She prayed for Will,

And for Henry,

But mostly for JJ,

Asking God to help her through this…

To help them all through this.

As JJ's high pitched screams of loss turned into low choked sobs. It wasn't long before she fell into a restless sleep. Her soul and body completely drained as thoughts of her baby boy, smiling and happy, led her into a state of unconsciousness.

"I love you, Mommy."

So what do you think? Can JJ get through this? With friends like the team, I think she could get through anything. Anyway, please let me know what you think and if you have any suggestion or reviews. It's not finished quite yet. Thank you for the reviews! They really mean a lot.

-HCB