The Decade
Disclaimer: I own not one thing.
Dear Enjolras,
I believe there is no 'One True Love'. No 'Meant to Be'.
I believe you can fall in love over and over and over again, so long as you're willing.
The key is finding one whom you love so much that you are willing to give up falling in love over and over for.
For me, I believe that was you.
Eponine is thirteen when she learns from the boy she has fallen in love with will never love her back.
"I'm scared 'Ponine," R tells her, the two street rats are sitting beneath the shelter of an old house that's missing half of its roof, but it is better than no cover at all and beggars cannot be choosers. No one knows that better than those who live under the rules of the streets.
"Why are you scared?" She asks, quietly; her brother and sister are pressed on her left side, asleep at last, and she is snuggling for warmth with R, hoping that this winter will not be as extreme as it is seeming to be.
"Because," He falters before he can get more than that one word out and she leans closer and asks him what it is he's trying to say, that she will not judge him, that she will not desert him, "Because," He begins again, "I'm gay and you know what they do to people like me out here," His words are a whispered rush and Eponine, pressed against him as she is, barely catches them.
Her eyes widen as her heart breaks. She had thought herself so witty choosing a boy who could not break her heart. It turns out her luck is as it has always been. Horrible.
Grantaire takes in her silence, her widened eyes and assumes the worst, assumes that she is going to tell her father and get him lynched for sure, or worse, killed. He is ready to beg at her feet, to plead with her not to tell her father because he is a scared little boy and he will do anything to avoid more pain, and when he tells her as much, he is surprised at the physical abuse she lands on him.
He had expected rejection from her, yes, but still, some part of him had hoped that she would understand, that she would not be like everyone else, that she would be his one, true, friend.
"'Ponine-"
"You stupid boy!" She is smart enough to still breathe out her words, her siblings are still asleep and they must never know of this. If they do, if their father finds out, she would rather not think of the consequences, "If you were going to tell me you could have told me somewhere more private!" She grabs his arm and yanks him out of the shambled home, "And how dare you," She continues, once they are out on the street, "How dare you assume that I would tell my father!"
He simply looks at her, confused, "You're not mad at me?"
"Oh, I am mad at you, Grantaire, but not for your-situation," She would say 'being gay' but now that they are on the street, anyone can hear and it's best if they don't, "I'm mad at you for assuming that I would do something so horrible!"
"So you don't care, you don't care that I'm-" The light in his eyes sparkle, that he has this one true friend, who not only knows the truth but accepts him anyway, who does not think of him any differently, it fills his cold heart with warmth.
"Of course I don't!" She does, she really, really, does. Not because she views him any differently, but because her heart is crumbling. She won't tell him that she was in love with him, because even if her heart is breaking, as long as he's happy, she can be too.
They'll be best friends and nothing more and she will be okay with that because nothing will change and loving him was stupid anyway, even if he was straight, he would never love her. Who could love the daughter of the worst kind of villain?
Nothing will change, she is determined, he will never know her feelings for him and they will go away, in time.
They have to go away.
"Does-" She cuts herself off, hesitates, before continuing, "Does anyone else know?"
He shakes his head, no, "Please don't tell."
"Course not," She says, looping her arm through his, "Not if you don't want me to. Now let's go inside." She looks up at the sky and chews her lip worried, "I think it's going to start snowing again."
Dear Gabe,
I love you, you must know that, I love you so much that thinking about you breaks my heart all over again, brings the pain back so thoroughly that it would be better for me if I did not think of you.
And yet, I find myself thinking of you, enduring the pain, because when I think of you, I'm a better version of myself and that gives me the strength to keep thinking of you, of moving forward and becoming a whole new version of myself.
A me that doesn't need you to help her.
Amelie arrives at Eponine's classroom door a half hour before class starts. The girl is putting up the children's artwork and is so consumed with her task, that she doesn't hear Amelie's knock at the door, or the clearing of her throat.
Finally the blonde just says, "Excuse me?"
Eponine startles and immediately berates herself for leaving her old habits so far behind. She shouldn't get so comfortable with her surroundings. She may be away from immediate danger but it is always best to be aware of your surroundings.
Especially when people from a not so pleasant past have the chance of reappearing.
"I'm sorry," Eponine says, straightening her outfit and placing the drawing in her hand on the table before looking up at Amelie, "I was just so focused on what I was doing, I didn't hear you come in."
Sebastian goes to put away his things as the two women begin their conversation.
"It's alright," Amelie says, smiling, though it's forced, Eponine can't tell the difference. She does not know the woman well enough to see what her real smiles are like.
"Is there something I can help you with?" She questions when Amelie does not continue.
"I was just wondering how Sebastian was getting along, with his peers, in class?" She begins and has to bite her lip to keep from throwing mean-spirited words and accusations at the woman before her.
"Oh! He's doing-Sebastian," Eponine calls out, her attention suddenly diverted to him, for the boy has already gone to his place on the rug and is waiting patiently for everyone else, "You can play with toys until everyone starts to come!" She watches him rush off towards the puzzles, which she has noticed as his particular favorites, before turning back to his mother, "I'm sorry what were we talking about?"
"How my son is progressing?" Amelie repeats, crossing her arms.
"Right! I'm sorry, I've been a little scatter-brained recently," Eponine says with a little laugh that is not mirrored by the woman standing in front of her, "He's doing great," She continues, a little wary of Sebastian's mother now, "It's like he started with this class from the beginning of the year. He gets along with everyone, he volunteers to help whenever I ask and he's not afraid of participating."
Amelie nods along, "Good, good," She says, a bit distractedly, wondering how she is going to phrase the next part of what she has to say.
"I get the feeling that's not what you really wanted to speak to me about," Eponine hedges, hinting to the young mother that she knows something is off.
"What is your relationship with my-" She cuts herself off before she can continue. Her face is red with embarrassment, not because she just lost control of herself, but because she was about to say, 'What is your relationship with my husband.'
Is she so dependent on him now, so in love with him that this is what she has begun to hope for, to think of when everything has never seemed so far away?
She is setting herself for heartbreak, she realizes, and is unable to continue her words.
Eponine, however, gets the gist of things and leans against the wall behind her. She sighs, shoves her hands through her hair and then proceeds to let out a big breath of air, stalling for time, stalling so that she can get her thoughts in order.
She really hadn't expected this to happen.
"With Gabe, right? You were going to ask me what my relationship with Gabe is." She dives right in, seeing no use as to try and pretend to be ignorant. That would just insult both herself and Amelie.
The blonde simply nods, her head is reeling. First she had almost called him her husband, and now Eponine not only does not deny her knowing Enjolras, which is what Amelie had expected, she has the honor of calling him by his first name.
His given name.
Something not even she gets to do.
She is jealous. So jealous that for a moment all she sees is red and there is a buzzing in her ears.
"I really think it's for him to explain," Eponine is saying and although the woman is barely a step away from her, to Amelie, it seems as if she's miles off. Only the promises of, "It's nothing bad! We're not having an affair or anything!" Can keep her on her feet. "We're just old friends," Eponine continues, unaware of the internal struggle Amelie is facing, "Who haven't seen each other in almost ten years."
"You knew about me," Amelie accuses, "You knew about me and him when I, his girlfriend, knew nothing!" The words are wrenched from her throat before she even has time to think through them.
The brunette nods and wrings her hands together in dismay, she glances over at Sebastian, as if to make sure he is not paying any attention before continuing, as if Eponine Jondrette cares more for Sebastian than his own mother does!
"He doesn't know I know. About you, that is," Is her quiet response and it's so unexpected that Amelie takes a step back as she's thrown for another loop.
"He didn't tell you about me?" The hurt in her voice must be evident but Eponine does not pity her.
"No," She says, instead, her face blank of any emotion other than sympathy and pain, "I'm going to assume he did not tell you about me either."
Amelie shakes her head, and tells Eponine how she followed him, saw their meeting.
The other woman merely sighs, "I don't think he meant to hurt either of us, I just, I think," She stumbles through her words, trying to find the correct ones for her thoughts, "He just wasn't ready to let his past and present collide yet. I think he's still focused on himself, I don't think he quite believes it yet. Once he's no longer shocked by my sudden reappearance in his life, I'm sure he will tell you about me, I'm sure he never meant to keep secrets."
Neither girl tells the other that they are sure he did mean to keep secrets, to have the best of both worlds.
Amelie is sure that his goal is to have Eponine as his bit on the side, that look on his face when he met with her yesterday...
"He loves you. Not me." The words taste bitter on Amelie's tongue but they ring true and she cannot hold them in. Eponine, is not only shocked but she really doesn't believe the other woman, "I saw the way he looked at you. The other day." Eponine doesn't say anything, she just looks at Amelie as she continues, "He loves you and you probably love him too, but, please, Eponine, I'm-I can't be without him. Not yet-and I know this is selfish of me and I know I'm horrible and I know that if our positions were switched I would probably punch myself in the face and I'm not making any sense but I can't let him go. Not yet."
How can Eponine break this woman's heart? She can't. She really can't because she's been in that place and she can't be the girl to steal Enjolras away from another twice.
She could barely do it once.
She has needed someone and where no one was there for her, Gabe can be there for Amelie so she just shakes her head and tells the woman that she has nothing to worry about.
Once again Eponine breaks her heart for the happiness of someone else, she tells Amelie to leave, that students will come pouring in soon and that she has had her time with Gabriel Enjolras, that it is Amelie's turn now because she loves him as well and there is no way he would still be with her if he didn't love her.
She reassures her and watches her walk down the hall and out of sight and then Eponine welcomes her students as they come in, excited for a new day.
Dear Enjolras,
Azelma had her first heartbreak today and when she asked, "Will it hurt this badly next time?" I wanted to say no, but I knew that would be a lie and I could not lie to her even though I wanted to.
Eponine Thenardier is in love with Marius Pontmercy.
It's almost been a year since she's realized this and she's well aware that everyone else in their group of friends knows it too (everyone but him, that is).
"You should tell him," Grantaire says, nudging her.
"I will," She whispers back, "When the time is right."
They're in the middle of class and she will not have him get her into trouble again, so she turns away and tries to concentrate on what the teacher is saying but R doesn't take the hint. Instead he pokes her side, making her jump and bang her knee against her desk.
She has to bite her lip from cursing at him and he has to bite his to keep from laughing.
"What?" She hisses, not in the mood for her best friend's tricks.
"When will the time be right?"
"When you tell Enjolras how you feel."
He turns away with a grunt and she knows she has won; but the victory is short lived, because as they exit class Grantaire picks the subject up again.
"Alright, I'll tell him, but first you have to tell Marius!"
"Why do I have to go first?" She questions, making an incredulous face, "This is your idea, you should go first."
"Well, Love," He begins, only to be cut off by Eponine telling him not to call her that, "Well what should I address you as, then?" He asks, momentarily thrown off course.
"Eponine. Contrary to your belief, it is my name."
"Hush, Pony," He says, instead. Eponine reacts to the nickname by punching him in the arm and threatening to cut him if he ever calls her that again, "Fine," He agrees, "But only because you're scary."
They walk into lunch arguing about nicknames, their previous conversation all but forgotten, when Marius runs up to Eponine and yanks her away from Grantaire.
"Enjoy yourself, my little duckies!" He cackles before joining the lunch line as Eponine is helpless yanked away by the man she adores.
"Marius, what's wrong?"
"Nothing's wrong!" The boy says almost giddily, "I'm in love, 'Ponine!" For a moment Eponine's world stops, her heart skips a beat and a grin forms on her face. In this one moment, she's never been happier; but then he continues and shatters her into thousands of little pieces, "I just saw her in the principal's office! She's new! Her name is Cosette; I only just learned this, you see, when I first saw her I was sure, convinced, her name would be Ursula, but no, it's Cosette and she is an angel, Eponine! She is sent by God himself! I've never seen a girl more beautiful, more perfect in my life!"
Her heart sinks lower and lower with each word, the grin turns to a fake smile is progressively gets harder and harder to keep up, "What do you need me for, Marius?" She asks, almost afraid of the answer.
"Well you're a girl, aren't you? Can you get close to her? Be her friend? Say nice things about me?"
She nods, agrees, because this is Marius and she's in love with him and if it makes him happy then she will do whatever he wants of her with a smile on her face even if every word that he says drives a dagger through her heart.
In the end, Eponine isn't needed after all because the moment Cosette sees Marius, she too is blinded by love.
With Marius, Cosette soars through a world that is new, that is free. The moment their eyes lock as she enters the hall, her father beside her, Eponine beside Marius, it is obvious.
They are struck.
It is love at first sight. They're transported into a world that Eponine cannot reach, touch or even see and she does not bother to stay and let them see her heart break, no, instead she rushes back to find Grantaire, to tell him that she will never be able to tell Marius how she feels.
As she turns the corner, she runs head first into Enjolras, who looks as if he's about to murder someone.
"Enjolras?"
"Eponine?"
The two look at each other surprised, neither expecting the other to be there; Eponine gathers herself first, "Have you seen R?"
"He started a food fight and is now getting an earful from a gang of teachers." He looks her over and frowns, he has been her other close friend throughout the years and can immediately tell that something is off, "What's wrong." It's a statement, not a question.
She bites her lip and manages to choke out, "Marius."
Enjolras' eyes cloud and turn stormy, "What did he do?" She just shakes her head and Enjolras holds her close. It doesn't take long for her to tell him that Marius has fallen in love with Cosette.
Enjolras doesn't tell her the false promises Grantaire would. He doesn't tell her that it's a short-lived thing, that Marius could still be hers one day. Instead, he is her rock and she leans on him just like she did when she was a little girl.
After this scene in the hall she is never alone with Marius or Cosette, either R or Enjolras is always there with her and that support is heavenly but it doesn't matter. They don't notice anyone other than the other. In fact, the two are so in love that it takes Cosette a whole month to realize that she knows Eponine, that she was once in the foster home run by her parents whereas it took Eponine only moments to recognize the other girl, and did nothing to hide who she was.
It's not lost on Eponine how the tables have turned.
Cosette is now pretty, happy and rich with the boy that Eponine is in love with.
Eponine is now filthy, ugly and poor with a heart full of love and no one to accept it.
It's the second time her heart breaks.
Dear Enjolras,
I think I'm going to drown in student loans.
"Courf?" Combeferre calls into their apartment, it's lunch and usually they have it together but some days Courfeyrac cannot get away from work and has to eat lunch there.
"In the kitchen," He hears the other man call and he's glad that today is not one of those days.
"Hey," He says, walking into the kitchen, surprised to see Courfeyrac hovering over the stove. The man cannot cook. At all.
"Hey! I made Ramen!"
Well that figures, 'Ferre muses to himself, amused, "Cool. Anyway, there was something I forgot to tell you," He says, going to sit on a chair.
"Okay, what is it?" Courfeyrac asks, turning around, all ears.
"Are you wearing my apron?" 'Ferre asks instead, eyes narrowing as he takes in his best friend's appearance.
"No..." 'Fey denies and turns around, speaking slowly, "Why would you think that?"
Combeferre just sighs and shakes his head, "Just make sure you don't spill anything on it."
"I'm not Bossuet, 'Ferre, now say what you need to say!"
"Oh! Right!" It's as if the reminder reanimates him, "Remember the day I went to visit Eponine?"
"When you found out that Enjolras doesn't know about the name switch?"
"Yes! Well I forgot that I'd seen her write a letter to him as well, it came to me this morning while I was stuck in traffic, that I'd forgotten all about it!"
Courf looks over his shoulder, "No one writes letters these days."
"That's what I said! Anyway, she got really mad and shooed me out the door when I ran into them, it was a lucky break really." Courfeyrac brings the food over to the table and Combeferre starts eating absentmindedly while continuing his tale, "I forget the exact contents of the letter but I think she's been writing them throughout the years, it mentioned something along the lines of 'The you in real life does not know all that the you in my imagination does.'"
"Well that sounds useful, perhaps we can use these letters?"
"Exactly! The only drawback is that we'd have to break into her apartment and find them!"
Excited, Combeferre, starts pacing the length of the little kitchen, going over details and plans about how they can execute this idea. Courf just sighs and tells him to eat his food, "We'll discuss this on Friday. I'll add it to the email."
Surprisingly 'Ferre listens, although he is still very anxious, his hands flying everywhere to help punctuate his points as 'Fey toys with the idea that maybe it really isn't right to mess with Eponine and Enjolras' lives like this.
Maybe Gavroche and Cosette are right.
Dear Gabe,
When I speak to you, I think you know everything about me, everything that has happened in these ten years and yet, that is not the case.
The you in my imagination knows these things, but not the real you.
The real you has only just reunited with his old friend.
Due to this, I'm constantly balancing on a tightrope, wondering what you know and what I think you know and wondering how I'm ever going to pull this off without you knowing about these letters; because now I realize you can never see these.
You will probably think of me as some sort of crazy girl who couldn't leave you alone. Almost like a stalker and I don't want you to think of me that way.
Maybe I am crazy. Do crazy people think they're crazy?
I don't know what to do anymore.
It is three-fifteen in the morning when Eponine is awakened to banging on her window. She groans and stumbles over Grantaire, shoves Azelma and Gavroche out of the way and climbs through a mountain of clothing to get to the window, ready to tell Marius exactly where he can shove it because she is not going to help him do the whole romantic boyfriend thing this early ever again when she sees that it is Enjolras at the window and he looks as if he's just been run over by two, no, three trucks.
She shoves the window open and climbs out to meet him, "Normal people use doors," She whispers, hoping that the jibe will make him look more like himself, as she carefully starts closing it behind her, not wanting to wake the occupants; but she stops halfway through her job, "Should I get R?" She questions, eyeing him worriedly. When he shakes his head in the negative, she finishes lowering the window down and goes to sit beside him.
They lean against the side of the long abandoned house that they're using for now and she counts stars waiting for Enjolras to start speaking. It takes a while and she's almost asleep again when he manages to choke out, "My parents."
"What about your parents?" She asks, worried. Quickly, she's awake again and she leans forward so she can look at his face once more and this time looks over it more slowly, hoping to gain more information through just his expressions. She knows his parents, she has seen the kind of snotty bourgeoisie they are and she knows that they hate their son's ideals, often putting him down.
Where her parents hurt her physically, his hurt him emotionally and sometimes Eponine wonders if that's worse. She has always known her parents stopped loving her, she learned that long ago, but Enjolras, Enjolras has never been sure if his parents do love him. Sometimes they are proud of him, when he brings home straight A's or agrees with them on something big (rare as that may be) but for the majority of the time they are disapproving and disappointed.
She knows he often wonders if they love him, just as Grantaire often wonders if Enjolras will ever love him.
It takes him a few more moments but he opens up to her and tells her that they are dead. They died this morning-a car crash on their way to work.
His father died instantly, his mother just two hours ago.
"I ran away," He tells her, and she knows he is crying now, knows that he doesn't want her to see him like this so she looks up at the sky again.
"You should go back," She says softly, "Your sister will be worried about you."
She can immediately tell that it's the wrong this to say from the way he stiffens, "I would tell you that I'm not her problem but she's probably my legal guardian now."
Enjolras' sister is almost ten years older than him and she's more of a distant relative than a sister to him, he rarely ever sees her but when he does, all they do is argue about his parents.
He's quiet for a moment and so Eponine risks a glance at him only to see that he's looking at her. Tears are falling from his eyes but it's like he doesn't care if she sees anymore.
"I'll never know if they loved me." He says and it comes out more like a sob than actual words and that's it, those are the words that crack Eponine's hardened heart.
She wraps her arms around and whispers, "Oh Enjolras," But that's not enough, she switches back to a name she hasn't used for a long time, "Oh Gabe, I'm sure that they did, I'm positive they did."
She holds him as he cries into her chest and she's got this feeling of utter despair because of the pain he's in, pain that she wishes she could keep him from.
She wishes her parents were dead instead of his, she wishes that things were better for him and she hopes no one is out on the streets looking for him because they are a dangerous place at night and she's surprised that he managed to find her at this time of night without getting mugged. She knows Montparnasse likes to keep an eye on her some nights and she's grateful that tonight isn't one of those nights.
"I'm sixteen, 'Ponine," He tells her, "They're not supposed to die until I'm old and married with three kids of my own."
"I know," She whispers back to him, rocking back and forth, trying to soothe him while trying not to lose it herself. She's scared, this is not the Gabriel Enjolras she is used to, the one who barely ever shows the faintest hint of emotion. She doesn't know what she can do to make it better so she just lets him keep talking.
After a while he stops making sense. It starts becoming gibberish and she hushes him once more. Looking up, she can tell that dawn is approaching. She sees movement to her right and when she looks up she sees Grantaire in the window, with a pained expression on his face and she wants to tell him that nothing has happened between her and Gabe, that there's nothing going on (although she's starting to wish otherwise) but his face is gone in an instant and so she will have to explain later.
Eventually it's light out and she wipes away his tears and tells him to go, that his sister is definitely worried and that if he wants to talk to her, she will always be right there for him.
He nods, thanks her and apologizes before turning around and leaving her sitting alone on the now wet grass. She takes a moment, breathes in the fresh air, shakes out her limbs that are numb from being in the same position for so long, before heading back inside.
"Eponine." Grantaire greets and he looks so sullen she's glad that she refuses to let him keep alcohol around.
"Grantaire, it's not what it looked like."
He barks out a laugh, "Then what was it?"
She bites her lip not sure if she should say anything, not sure if Gabe would want her to reveal this and she's inexplicably angry at R for forcing her to betray his confidence because the look on his face decides it for her and she blurts out, "His parents just died." She gets the sick satisfaction of seeing all the blood drain from his face, "Gabe, he didn't want you to see him crying, okay? Don't tell anyone," She pleads.
He nods, at first accepting what she has told him, but soon his face returns to stone, "You love him." The words are not an accusation but a simple statement of facts.
It's her turn to lose all the color in her face, "I-"
"Don't deny it, it's written all over your face. Who was I kidding? Thinking a guy like him would ever settle for me, but here's the thing, Eponine," He spits her name out like it's something disgusting, "I never thought that he'd go for you either."
"Grantaire, I would never-"
He cuts her off again, "Come on 'Ponine, you called him Gabe. Gabe." With that said, he turns and storms out, not letting her say another word.
She's about to chase after him, about to tell him that she will never go for Gabe, when she realizes that she did call him Gabe. That she has reached a point in her relationship with Gabriel Enjolras that Grantaire never has, for all the years he's known him.
Still, she takes a step towards the door but Gavroche is now awake and asks her if, "Mama and Papa have found us again?" The terror in her brother's voice gives her reason enough to stay and she squats down beside him, telling him that they are safe here, for now.
It takes a while, but Grantaire does forgive her, however, things are never the same between them again. They aren't as close as they once were and soon he's drinking more often and the closer she and Gabe grow together, the further from their reach Grantaire becomes.
Dear Enjolras,
I saw a painting of Grantaire's today. It is done only in red and black, dark slashes of anger on a canvas and I know it signifies the two of us.
You, so often in red, passionate for your causes, and I, the shadow, cloaked in darkness.
If there's one person I miss more than you, it's him; but I've been missing him for longer than I have been missing you and the pain I feel when I think of him is merely a dull ache, now.
I know that he is lost to me forever.
Amelie slams the door to her apartment and all but screams in shock when she sees Enjolras sitting on the sofa.
He raises a brow when he sees her, "Well I'm going to assume that someone had a bad day."
"Well you know what they say about those who assume," Amelie practically bites Enjolras' head off.
He stands up and shows her his hands, as if to say 'Don't shoot.'
"Are you okay?"
"No I'm not," She practically spits.
"What's wrong?" He's more cautious now, and he approaches her slowly.
"Why didn't you tell me about Eponine?"
The words chill his blood and he opens his mouth but soon shuts it, unable to produce words.
"That's what I thought," Amelie is the ice queen right now, "Get out."
"Amelie-"
"Now."
He nods, and exits, knowing he's just majorly messed up. Angry, he slams his fist into the wall and adds a new layer of bruises to the old.
Amelie collapses onto the sofa for a moment, trying not to sob; she waits for a few minutes, until she's sure Enjolras will be gone, then she grabs her keys and goes to pick her son up from school.
Dear Enjolras,
Do you remember that essay that I once had to do? If there was any moment in time I could go back and change which would it be?
Most would think that I would go back and change That Night, but I wouldn't because I know that that heartache would have happened anyway, no matter what I did. It would simply take a different form.
Instead, I would change that night you came to me, when your parents died.
I would make sure that I never fell in love with you, in this case it would be better not to have loved at all.
So many things would be different.
So many people would be happy.
Amelie closes her eyes, she's twenty-four. She's in collage. She's not married. Her boyfriend just broke up with her.
She can't be pregnant.
She can't.
If she closes her eyes and counts to three, she will wake up. This will all just be a nightmare.
One.
Two.
Three.
She's awake and the pink plus sign doesn't change.
Her life is over.
She cries for a week, but eventually pulls herself together.
She can do this. She's always wanted kids. She will be a good mother. She's determined.
The first person she calls is her boyfriend, he deserves to know that he will be having a kid. Maybe they can work things out, get back together.
He calls her a slut and hangs up as soon as he hears what she's calling about.
She won't lie, it hurt. Some small part of her expected that rejection but the bigger piece hoped that he would come back, that they would get back together and everything would turn out fine. They would be a family.
Some things are not meant to be.
It's okay, she tells herself. She doesn't need him, she will find someone else. This isn't the eighteenth century, no one will condemn her for having a child out of wedlock.
Right?
The next person she calls is her mother and prays that it will go better this time around.
"I'm pregnant."
"You're what?" Her mother screeches.
"Pregnant, mother."
"Well that's wonderful!" For a second, Amelie relaxes, takes a breath and the knot in her stomach loosens a little, her mother is happy for her, but then it all comes crashing down, "When are you getting married? Oh, can I plan it?"
It takes a long time for her to explain to her mother marriage is not going to happen, a lot of 'What?' and 'Why?' and 'I simply don't understand, what are you trying to say?' type questions later, her mother tells her that she's very disappointed in her and not to call back until she's got her life straightened out.
Her mother, who although often distant, was always someone she could count on.
It's not until she meets Enjolras that it happens, that her life starts to get better, that her struggles start to lessen and that she finally gets to live life a little.
She stops being a run-ragged single mother.
She starts to get back some of the girl she used to be before her life got a ride from a tornado.
I'm so sorry for the lateness of this chapter. As much as I wanted to write it, I swore to myself that I'd finish my other fic first so I could dedicate myself to this one and then I was busy with back-to-school stuff (I move into my dorm on Thursday) and then I've also had these horrible headaches (thank you allergies), so yeah, in short this chapter is very late and I'm VERY sorry.
This chapter's sixteen pages, so I hope the extra long chapter will help make up for my lateness?
I'm going to dedicate this to a few very special people here (who listen to me complain and urge me to continue writing): J91, .9, MelancholySkies, DeathDaisy, and (of course) RomildaV.
Thanks to all that fave/review/follow! I love you guys.