Sarah looked at the time in the bottom right corner of her computer and then peeked up at the entrance to the building. She knew Steve came in almost everyday between eight and eight-ten, depending on traffic. It was already eight-fifteen and no sign of him. She wondered if he overslept from the night before or worse yet, if he had come in the back way to avoid her.

Danny walked by Steve's office and then stopped, seeing him on the couch. He went in just as he was sitting up.

"What time did you get in this morning?"

"I don't know," Steve moaned and stretched, "about seven or so."

"So you came in early to take a nap?" he chuckled.

"I was at the hospital most of the night." Steve looked up at him as that horrible pain in his chest returned. "Jacob died."

"Ah shit," Danny sighed. "I'm sorry." He took the seat next to him on the couch. "I'm really sorry Steve." He knew how close they had become. They all had a small stake in Jacob, but none more than Steve. He put a hand on his shoulder. "I thought he was doing better."

"We all did, but in the last week he just went downhill fast."

"Was Sarah there last night too?"

Steve nodded, feeling a little nauseous just thinking about the events that had unfolded with her the night before. He came in early because he couldn't sleep and was sick of pacing around his house with nothing to do but think about her and Jacob. She wasn't in yet when he came through the front entrance, but then again he knew she wouldn't be, which made him feel even worse knowing she probably thought he was avoiding her. He didn't do it on purpose, but then again, maybe he did. This whole situation was confusing and he didn't know which way to go or how he was supposed to approach it, or her, and worse yet, he had no one to ask advice from. He couldn't tell Danny what had happened the night before. He was ashamed knowing he had hurt her, if the tables were turned he'd be livid at Danny for doing it.

"How's she handling it?"

"Not good." 'And I didn't help it any by sleeping with her either,' he thought to himself, but didn't dare share that piece of information.

Danny could clearly see he was tired and emotionally drained. "You should go home. Take the day off."

Steve shook his head and stood up. "I can't, that's why I came in. I need something to occupy my mind."

"Then go fishing, or kayaking. Go for one of those long crazy hikes you're always trying to get me to do." He stood up with him. "I don't care what it is but you shouldn't be around here today. You're clearly in no shape for it. You look like hell."

Steve turned around, glaring at him.

Danny put his hand over his heart but in a patronizing way. "I mean that in the most sincere way. You need to take off and just let yourself grieve for him in the only way you know how, and that's by doing something reckless. Well, you know what I mean. In my opinion it's reckless but to you it's active." He put his hand on Steve's back, "You should go down and get Sarah and make her go with you. She probably needs it too."

He sat down in one of the chairs in front of his desk, resting his elbows on his knees as his head fell forward. "God Danny," he moaned, wanting to tell him.

"I'm serious Steve. We all thought the world of Jacob. He was an amazing little guy but you need to take some time and let yourself grieve for him. There's nothing wrong with that and Sarah's a good person for you to do that with."

He couldn't help but think he was absolutely right on both counts and if it were pre events from the night before, he would have done exactly that, but now…now everything had changed. "I can't talk to Sarah."

He leaned against the desk in front of him. "She's not the enemy. She's one of your closest allies and she's also feeling what you are right now, so maybe you should put aside those issues you have and maybe be there for her. Who knows, maybe you'll get something out of it too."

"Danny, it's not as easy as you think."

"Steve, it's Sarah. It doesn't get any safer than that."

Those words somehow turned things around for him. Danny was right even though he didn't know the real story. It was Sarah, and he couldn't avoid her forever. They had to face last night sooner or later and it was better to do it sooner rather than later. The longer they put it off the worse it would get. "You're right." He looked up at him. "You guys are good here today without me?"

"We got it covered." He walked him toward the exit. "Any word on the funeral yet?"

Steve shook his head. "I'll let you know."

He walked down the hall of the headquarters and stopped at the top of the marble stairs that led down to Sarah's work area, seeing her at her desk. He thought it would be awkward and uncomfortable, but as he stood there he felt neither of those. It was just like Danny had said, it was just Sarah, their friend, his friend. He came down the steps and toward her desk as someone said hello to him as they passed.

Sarah looked up hearing his name and was startled to see him standing next to her. She could feel her body tense up not sure what she was supposed to do or say. It was strange seeing him now knowing he had seen her in the most intimate way possible only a few hours before. Then again she had seen him in the same way. That thought didn't help. It was the one she had wished and fantasized over almost every single morning as he passed her desk and here it was a reality, but she felt nothing like she always dreamed she would; she only felt regret; the one word that she never would have imagined could enter her vocabulary the day after.

"Danny kicked me out of the office for the day," he said to her, "which is probably a good idea. I see Jacob everywhere up there. I can't think straight." He felt like he was rambling, avoiding what he really wanted was to ask her and that was if she was all right, and if their friendship was still intact, but he didn't want to have that conversation right there in front of her whole department.

She stared at her computer screen, not able to look at him. She felt embarrassed and wondered if he were there out of a sense of duty, or if he was just telling her he was leaving so she wouldn't think he was avoiding her. "Greg told me I could go home too, if I wanted." She had opted to stay not wanting to be alone and think about Jacob, or him.

He squatted down next her. "Do you want to go somewhere?"

She looked over at him and couldn't hide the shock on her face over that proposal, "Where?"

He shrugged, "The beach? A hike. I don't care. I just want to get out and I thought you might too."

She knew then that he was looking at Sarah his friend and not Sarah from the night before. She needed him last night and he was there for her. She couldn't deny him this and suddenly the extra curricular activity she had been agonizing over wasn't as important as helping him through this ordeal with Jacob. She knew him and had worried the night before at the hospital that he might try to close off his feelings that he had, but here he was, asking for her help in the only way he knew how. He wasn't inviting her to a one on one serious emotional breakthrough conversation. That wasn't his style. He just wanted to sit somewhere and just be, but didn't want to do it alone, he chose her to be with and if anyone knew him like she did, that alone was a huge compliment.

"Sure," she said. "The beach sounds good." She sent a quick email to her boss telling him she was taking his offer and taking the day off and then shut down, following him out of the station.

Sarah pulled up next to his truck in the parking lot of a local store on the east shore. They had separated at the station and decided to meet up there and then go to Bellows Beach that was located on the Air Force base. It was closed to the public during the week but with Steve's credentials he could get in anytime. They often went there during the week and holidays to get away from the tourists, knowing it would be deserted except for the occasional military family.

He came out of the store and smiled at her as she got out of her car. Her hair was up in that signature ponytail but as he looked at her the image of it fanned out on the pillow the night before came to him. He felt his blood begin to race through his body and the hair stood up on his arms, remembering the way she looked at him.

"Hi," she called out, "I brought some of that pineapple dip you like with those ranch crackers."

He nodded, showing his pleasure over that and held up the plastic bag in his hand. "I bought you those Sun Chips you love, and beer."

Sarah laughed, "We know each others comfort food don't we?" She closed and locked her car, climbing in the front seat of his truck.

He set the bag in the back and got in next to her. She smiled over at him and his eyes were instantly drawn to her baggy shirt recalling the soft skin that was under it, and the mysterious breasts that he wanted to touch so badly the night before.

"It's a beautiful day," she said, unknowingly interrupting his fantasy. "Do you think Jacob had something to do with that?"

Hearing that name threw him back into reality. "I'm sure he's probably head honcho up there already. That could be really good for us. It's panning out already." He started the truck and headed down the road to the turn off to Bellows Beach.

Neither had yet to mention the night before, and it was ok. They were both elated to just be in this same familiar and comfortable place with the other. It was more important at the moment.

Sarah lay on the blanket with her eyes closed. She could hear the little girl down the way screaming and laughing as she and her mother played in the water. They were the only other inhabitants on the beach besides she and Steve. She sat up on her elbows and looked out over the water for him. She spotted him about fifty yards out as he came up blowing water out his snorkel and then went back under again. He was like a little kid out there exploring. It was one of the things that she loved most about him. Her thoughts drifted to the night before and the feel of him on top of her and inside of her; that was one of the other things she could add to her list that she loved about him, he was an exceptional lover. She wished now it would have lasted longer and with that thought she felt her body flush as the incredible feeling of that orgasm came sweeping over her. She remembered how quickly it came on. It had hit her so fast and with so much intensity that the timing was inevitable. The other two men she had been with had never been able to accomplish what he had so easily.

She thought it would be difficult spending the day with him. She almost backed out while she was home changing, glad now that she hadn't. Still, it was hard to look at him and not see the man who was sitting on the side of her bed last night looking so perfect after he had just made love to her. 'Made love,' she thought, scoffing, 'that's a pretty strong word to use to describe what he was feeling. More like shock and pity.' She remembered that look on his face and those lovely feelings quickly turned on her and so she decided to divert her thoughts elsewhere than on Steve McGarrett. She had become a pro at being able to do that.

She thought of Jacob instead and smiled to herself recalling the time they had brought he and his Mother here for Memorial Day. She sat up again on her elbows and glanced down the beach at the picnic table under a group of trees that they had used. She remembered him sitting on it with Steve as they ate watermelon and had a seed-spitting contest. Jacob had tried so hard to get some distance, but most of them ended up in his lap or on his chin. She couldn't help but laugh over the memory of it. That whole day had been perfect.

Her sight became blurred, still not over the fact that he was really gone forever. She missed him already. She sat up and dried her eyes just as she heard her name being called from the water. She looked out at Steve as he waved her in.

"Come here," he yelled. "You have to see this. Hurry!"

She reached over and grabbed her facemask and snorkel, heading for the water.

She dove in and began to swim toward him.

He treaded water waiting for her, completely amazed at what he had found. As she got closer he swam to her. The look on his face was a cross between shock and wonderment. "You aren't going to believe this Sarah."

"What is it?" she asked as she adjusted her mask.

"You'll see." He waited until she was ready. "Follow me down. It's about fifteen feet."

They both took deep breaths and she followed behind him as he swam down toward the coral. He looked back at her as they hovered over a section that didn't look any different from any other coral they had snorkeled before, and then he pointed at it.

Sarah gasped under the water staring at the hand size rock with Jacob's name painted on it. She shot toward the surface unable to hold her breath over the shock of seeing it. She swam over to a shallow area, grabbing ahold of the rocks there were only a few feet under the water even though they were still several yards off shore. She pulled her mask and snorkel off taking a deep breath. He came up right after her, pulling himself up next to her.

"How did that get there?!" she said breathless, staring at him as if she had just seen a ghost.

"I don't know." He shook his head with the same thought. "I don't know." He pointed toward the shore. "I remember being over by the parking lot on Memorial Day when we walked by that group of kids painting them and they said he could do one. We helped him spell his name out, remember?"

Sarah nodded, still trying to catch her breath. "Oh my God, I can't believe that's down there." She looked up at him in amazement, "I can't believe you found it."

"I can't either."

They stared at each other both amazed over the discovery. It was almost as if they had found a hidden treasure.

"Should we leave it?" he asked her, wanting to take it but not sure if it was the right thing to do under the circumstances.

She wasn't sure either. "I don't know. Maybe it's supposed to be there."

"Or maybe it was supposed to be found by us," he suggested, never once wavering from her stare.

She knew what he was talking about. They had both lived on the islands long enough to become accustom to the Akua's and hear some of the wild stories from the locals that were attributed to curses from them, but other times there were stories of gifts too. She knew he wanted it. She couldn't think of one good reason to leave it and his suggestion that maybe they were supposed to find it meant so much more. "You should get it."

"Do you think it would be all right?"

She nodded, "Yes, I do." The elation in his eyes after being given permission was something she knew she would never forget.

He kissed her, thanking her for the approval before he slipped his mask back on and dove under.

They sat next to each other on the beach with the rock sitting in the sand in front of them. Sarah had her legs pulled up against her chest, resting her chin on her knees looking at it. Steve had his legs stretched out with his hands braced behind him in the sand.

"How did you find it?" Sarah asked him.

"I was following an eel and it disappeared into a hole in the coral right above it and I looked down, and there it was. I had to come up and clear my snorkel because I was just as shocked as you were when you saw it. I went back to make sure that I wasn't hallucinating, and sure enough I saw the name on it. That's when I called for you."

"This is unbelievable that we found it today of all days," she looked over at him. "You know?"

He nodded, agreeing with her. "The only explanation I can think of is that Jacob must have left it here that day and either the tide took it out, or someone threw it out there."

"That would make sense."

They both looked at each other, neither one saying it, but both of them secretly hoping it was actually a gift from the Akua's.

He smiled at her. "Thanks for coming with me today. If you hadn't, I never would have come here and I never would have found it."

"Thanks for coming to get me. I wasn't expecting that."

He sat forward, imitating her position but in a more masculine way. They were both silent but both had the same thought going through their head. Steve finally broached the subject they had been putting off all day.

"Should we just talk about it and get out in the open," he turned his head just slightly, barely catching a glimpse of her before turning away again, "or should we just keep pretending like it never happened?"

She scooped up a handful of sand and let it slowly sift through her fingers. "The one thing that scared me the most is that I was afraid it would come between us."

"Me too," he admitted, recalling having to sit on the bottom step of her stairs because it had frightened him so much. "It scared the hell out of me."

"I'm sorry for putting you in that position. I know you were just trying to make me feel better by being there and somehow things got out of control and I took advantage of that."

He wasn't expecting her to take the blame for what happened and didn't want her to her either. "I think we both were hurting pretty bad. I could have stopped it, but I didn't." 'You couldn't have stopped shit,' he thought to himself. "The last thing I wanted to do was hurt you, and I feel like I did." He looked over at her for clarification.

She didn't know what to say. He sounded so sincere yet he still hadn't mentioned whether he regretted it or not. Then again she hadn't either. "Please don't feel that way Steve. I don't want you to feel guilty over what happened. I instigated it and I think the only reason you didn't stop it was because you didn't want to hurt me. So please, please don't feel bad." 'Or just tell me that you didn't stop it because you wanted me just as much," she thought.

He smiled, remembering the kisses that started it all. "I have to admit I was a little shocked when you kissed me." He playfully winked at her, "You have a naughty side, don't you?"

Sarah felt her face flush having to admit she'd never done anything remotely like that before. "I don't know what came over me." 'Yes you do, liar.' "I think the whole thing with Jacob…" she used his theory as her way out, "it just escalated."

He wanted to ask her if she regretted it, but thought it better to just let it go. After all, she did just admit she didn't mean to do it. He wasn't sure if he was disappointed by that or relieved, maybe a little of both. He had been so afraid the night before that he was going to lose her that he didn't want to jeopardize this friendship in any way ever again. He hadn't realized how much he needed it than he did over the past twenty-four hours.

She felt they had said about all they were going to about it and just like she had figured, he was there with her during the love making, but he was only there for her, not necessarily for himself. She decided it was what it was, a one-time thing and nothing more. She playfully nudged him, "Well don't get your hopes up that it will happen again. I was depressed, so if you're looking for that type of excitement, you'll have to start hanging out at psychiatrist offices."

Steve laughed, shoving her back with his shoulder. "That's terrible!"

"You never know, tell a few jokes and wear your badge, you could have them lining up in the waiting room." She raised a finger, "Better yet! Wear your Navy uniform. You know how women love a man in uniform." She laughed with him, "It would be like community service."

He stood up, "Oh okay, use the very symbol that I spent protecting our country to pick up women. You're shameless for suggesting that."

"Oh Please!" Sarah got up, "Look me in the face and tell me that you have never once used that Navy uniform to score."

He wanted to deny it, not wanting to give her the satisfaction but knew he couldn't do it. "Okay!" he admitted, "maybe once."

"Or twice, or three times!"

"Once!" he said leaning over her shoulder as she turned toward the water. "It was one time, and believe me she wasn't worth it."

"Now whose the shameless one? I bet you snuck away the next morning, never to be seen again."

"I didn't say that I slept with her. We went out once but I didn't like her."

"And you still didn't sleep with her? Yeah right!"

"No, I didn't." He was a little annoyed at not only her tone, but also the way this conversation had turned on him.

"Sure you didn't," she snickered. "She's probably still waiting for your call you promised her."

He stopped joking and stared at her. "Do you really think that way about me?"

She put her hands on her hips, "And what way is that?"

"That I use women."

She tilted her head, giving him a look, "You've never had a one night stand?"

"No," he said sarcastically, "not until last night. Was that your first one?" He regretted saying it but she was pissing him off, accusing him of those things when he'd never even shown that kind of lifestyle around her; she had no right, it really pissed him off.

Her hands dropped to her side. It was like a slap in the face. She had never once considered what had happened between them as reckless and bad as a one-night stand. It may not have been the smartest thing either one had ever done but at least they cared for each other, and even after it was over the awkwardness couldn't be compared to if she was with a stranger. It was him, but worse yet he was accusing her of being promiscuous, when he knew damn well she wasn't. "No," she said angrily, "it wasn't my first. Let me see…" she pretended to count on her fingers. "Gee, I don't know, maybe my fiftieth!" She scooped up her towel shaking it off, wishing she had brought her own car now.

"What?" he said, "You're pissed at me? You just stood there accusing me of the same thing and that's perfectly justifiable?"

"Oh yeah, I'm sure I wounded you with my comments of being able to score with women. I've been around men my whole life and not one of them has ever been offended by that accusation, so please don't tell me what you just said to me was the same thing."

She was right in that aspect but coming from other guys was one thing, but coming from her was another. "Yeah exactly, when it comes from other guys, not when it comes from you." She was making it sound like he didn't care about the women he was with, or that the night before meant nothing. It defiantly meant something because he couldn't stop thinking about it, or her.

She glared at him, "If I would have said that to you yesterday you would have laughed it off."

There was no other truer statement in the world.

"Now all of a sudden it's offensive?" she said. "And not only that but you insult me by calling me a whore!"

"Whoa!" he held his hands up, "I never said that!" She went to walk away when he grabbed her by the back of her shirt, "Wait!"

She pulled her body away getting out of his grip when he came around in front of her.

"Wait a second!" He put his hands up, motioning for her to stop. If it had been the day before he probably would have put his hands on her shoulders and been a little more forthcoming but some how it seemed awkward now. "Just stop for a second okay," he said more passively. "What's happening here? A few minutes ago we were celebrating finding Jacob's rock, and now all of a sudden we're at each other's throats. What happened?"

She could feel the shift in their relationship, even if he couldn't. She knew he was probably telling the truth about the woman and the one night stands, but the rejection from him had stung more than she had imagined. She was angry at him for something he couldn't control and now they were left with this. The reality of him not ever wanting her after so long of hoping was heartbreaking. "Things changed between us last night Steve. We're different now. We can't go back to the way it was."

"I don't believe that," he looked at her sadly. "Do you? Please tell me that you don't believe that Sarah"

The worry on his face was touching. He was genuinely concerned about losing her. If only he felt that way romantically toward her, they could be a great couple. She didn't have the heart to ruin this fantasy he had going that they could move forward from the night before, so she just agreed and decided to live in denial with him, for now. "No, I don't believe it either. I'm sorry for what I said."

He reached out and hugged her, wrapping his arms tightly around her, relieved. "I'm sorry too." For the second time that day he swore he wouldn't do anything ever again to jeopardize this friendship.

'Who knows, she thought, 'maybe I'll wake up tomorrow and those feelings for him will be gone.' But as she laid her head on his shoulder, she wanted to cry, because she knew it was inevitable. They were on a downward spiral that neither one could prevent.