It's been about a year since I last updated and I'm sorry to those that were anticipating, but I'm working on more chapters ! If you're still interested or like this chapter, feel free to review and lemme know! I even take criticism, I just want to hear from you guys. It's very encouraging. Be easy on me though, I'm a bit rusty, but you all have been great so I'm back again anyway. Hope to hear from you soon!
-{Price
Alex sat in a dark room, hugging her knees.
The blackness was so thick it was tangible... Suffocating. She breathed deeply trying to calm herself but soon she was hyperventilating. She moved out of her sitting position and scrambled forward, looking for a door, a wall... Anything. Panic began to set in as she looked in every direction for a way out. It felt like forever of her crawling and she was too shaken to rise.
Finally she reached a wall, and she pounded on it fiercely.. "Help!" She yelled, but couldn't hear her own voice. She realized the surface she pounded on wasn't concrete... It was glass. Or some sort of hard plastic... Then suddenly a blinding light shot through the glass and knocked her on her ass. She was in the dryer. The panic filled her again as she frantically called out to anyone who might hear her. This time she could hear herself, so she shrieked madly pleading for someone to free her.
"Alex?" The dark haired woman froze and attempted to seek out where the voice was coming from and was hindered by her limited scope.
And suddenly there she was, Piper Chapman, standing in front of her with eyes full of love and concern. She felt that she could die of happiness. There was so much she wanted to say. Then she remembered the woman's betrayal and she felt she might die of sadness. But she still needed to be rescued, and she was glad the blonde was there.
"Get me out of here, kid."
Piper nodded and silently went to work on the door as Alex felt herself begin to relax, watching her. After a few minutes of silence she felt Piper punch the machine and then, surprisingly it opened.
"Wow Pipes, I guess you have been learning something in shop class, huh?"
The woman smiled that beautiful heartwarming smile where her eyes became crescent moons and filled Alex's heart with joy. But it only lasted a moment. There was too much shit between them for it to be that simple. She leaned forward to get out of the contraption and said flatly to her once lover, "This doesn't change anything."
Piper's face became blank and again she simply nodded, holding one hand in the other. It was then that Alex noticed that her knuckles were bleeding. Then, all of a sudden Piper was pushed forward toward the dryer, closing it. "Piper...?" Alex breathed it out as she felt the air escape her lungs. And then she was stabbed. Repeatedly over and over as the blood soaked the glass, her shrill cries of pain filled the room but no one came to save her. Alex screamed her name paralyzed, eyes wide...punching and beating on the door. And then she watched Piper drop to her knees eyes lolling back into her head...before she fell over onto her back.
Her eyes were wide in absolute horror as she just blankly stared down at the lifeless body of her blonde little savior, silent tears streaming down her face in utter disbelief.
A smattering of people look on in the background at the scene. Larry, Polly, Piper's mother, Crazy Eyes, Pensatucky and others just look on blankly at her as she bled out muttering in what seemed to be a mix between disgust and indifference at the two of them.
"Why...WHY WON'T YOU HELP HER!" She spat at them, shrieking as she kicked and screamed and cursed at them and sobbing uncontrollably as she slunk back into the dryer.
As she looks into the dryer glass she can see her reflection...a reflection that morphs into her father's leering drunken face laughing at her.
Alex snapped awake in a cold sweat and sat up abruptly, her eyes darting about wildly as she attempts to catch her breath. Same old Suburbs, same old Litchfield she reassured herself. She waited for her eyes to focus as she leaned forward, her arms on her knees. Again. The same dream had woken her up again. It was getting to the point she didn't know when she last had a full nights sleep.
Her hands shot outward as she patted about for her glasses, squinting as she looked over her mattress for them. She groaned and began flipping up her covers before hearing the tell tale sound of clattering on the floor. As she sighed and bent down to pick up her spectacles she noticed something pushed far far underneath her bed. She frowned and got down on the floor to reach for the object, before hearing a pair of feet shuffling up to her dorm before stopping in front of her. Alex started slightly and quickly put her glasses on before looking up at-
"Nicki."
The wild haired woman smirked at her wryly before rubbing her nose and pointing down at her. "So, uh...Whatcha doing down there, Vause?"
Alex rolled her eyes. "Good morning."
Nicki pressed her tongue into her cheek before responding. "A little early to be on your knees isn't it? Not that I'm complaining." She watched as her friend slowly stood up and glanced at the clock and then around at the other sleeping inmates.
"Shower?" The raven haired woman's eyes shot up as she pointed towards it.
"Shower."
The taller woman pushed up her glasses and smirked before walking around her friend and toward the bathroom for their block. Nichols waggled her eyebrows and inclined her head as she followed behind her, giving her a playful slap on the rear. Alex jumped at the sudden contact with a smile which slowly deteriorated into a sort of grimace as she ran her fingers through her hair, failing miserably to ignore the empty bed that once belonged to Piper. Her things were still there. She wondered if she would ever stop associating this time of day with her estranged ex-lover, and their early morning escapades. Even as Nicki sidled up beside her, nudging her arm, she had a sinking feeling that she never really would. How much more time would have to pass? It had already been a couple months since she'd seen hide or tail of her.
"You okay?" Nicki was looking up into her face, having stopped her in the corridor leading to the bathroom.
"Yeah?" She blinked. "Why wouldn't I be?"
Pressing a hand onto her friend's shoulder she peered into her eyes, narrowing them as she drew closer. Alex turned away from her searching gaze with a huff before looking back at her. This was happening more and more often.
"You wanna do this today?" She leaned back a bit, shooting her a quizzical look.
The woman rubbed at her face. "I'm just a little tired, that's all." She wasn't lying, her sleep had been restless at best and a terror at worst.
Nicki nodded at her slowly. "Bad dreams?"
Alex frowned and hesitated before shrugging her shoulders. "I don't want to talk about it."
There was a certain darkening behind the red head's eyes as she swallowed, understanding just enough as she gripped the shoulder her hand was on before reaching up behind her neck, nestling her fingers in her hair. She sighed, bringing the other woman's face close until their foreheads touched.
"You don't want to talk?" It was a whisper over her lips as Nicki brought their bodies closer, leaning into the taller woman. Alex eyed her intensely. Her hands moved slowly onto her friends waist as her eyes flitted down toward the pink mouth. The mood shifted as their weight shifted onto the wall. She shook her head slightly. Of course not, I just want to forget. Her eyes seemed to plead as she looked deeply into Nichols'.
"We don't have to talk." Nichols half-smiled and returned the look before grasping a handful of black hair and closing the gap between them.
Their kisses were slow and sensual as Nichols hands both went up into the full dark hair and Alex's pressed underneath the waistband of the beige jumpsuit to get at her supple behind, grabbing, pulling her even closer. Nicki responded by deepening the kiss, making Alex moan before pulling away for air. There was a pregnant moment as Nicki and Alex both gasped for air, Nicki once again peering into Alex's eyes as if she were looking for something. This was not their usual rough, thoughtless routine. There was something there in Alex's eyes in that moment. Something she hadn't seen before and she wasn't sure what it was or if it made her want to stop or go on. She was about to open her mouth to say something but Alex had closed her eyes and let out a deep breath and just like that it was gone. As quickly as it had shone through, it had disappeared. Just as abruptly, Alex had turned Nicki around and pressed her against the opposite wall. Nicki was turned on but her eyes scanned the ground as she briefly considered the shift of the mood.
Alex's aggressive but gentle touches were now rough and staggered as she pulled her hair, causing the woman to arch her back before attacking the skin usually covered up with beige fabric with kisses and bites, but more bites. Always more bites. Nicki groaned at the sensation as her eyes rolled back. She usually didn't let other women take control like this but this wasn't just any other woman. It had been a little bit of a power struggle at first between the both of them for this reason but soon they'd both learn to just /take it/. As if it were a drug. Their sex was an escape.
Alex's free hand snaked up her shirt and grabbed a breast, pinching at the nipple before grabbing and kneading. Another kiss found its way onto the nape of Nicki's neck. The hand then flew up to Nicki's mouth where two fingers danced at her lips before gaining entrance to her warm wet mouth. Nicki hummed, looking over her shoulder at Vause who's grip on her hair had slackened as she lustfully watched her friend suck on her fingers. Nicki withdrew the hand with a pop before pushing it down towards the waistband of her pants. Alex needed no further encouragement.
Her left hand tightened its grip on the wild red hair as the other hand slid down through soft down before reaching the warm wetness of Nicki's pussy. It was enough to make both of them groan in response. Alex pressed her fingers into the silky wetness before withdrawing them and making circle motions about Nicki's clit.
"Oh God..." Nicki's eyes screwed shut as she leaned into the other woman who in turn began to buck her hips rhythmically into her backside as she furiously rubbed her little bud. She reached out towards the wall in a futile effort to support herself as she felt herself boiling over. They rocked together like that, grinding, as they melted into one another. A sheen of sweat graced Alex's forehead as she worked.
Alex spoke hotly into her ear, "Come for me," before gliding her tongue over it, sending her over the edge as she leaned over into her. Nicki closed her eyes as her body shuddered with the release. She smacked the wall as she felt the tension that had been building up in her uncoil in vibrating streams of ecstasy. Alex held onto the woman looking down at her flustered red face as she trembled. For a moment there was just the sound of their breathing as they stood there. Nicki patted her on the arm.
"Your turn." She said cheekily looking at Vause, all traces of that odd look in her eyes gone. They smirked at each other. This was all they needed it to be,
For now.
Chapman yelled as she completed another series of oblique sit-ups and leaned back onto her arms before slipping into child's pose, to relieve the tense burning sensation in her abdomen. As she looked down at the dirty grey floor she exhaled, trying to forget where she was and focus on her center, or whatever it was Yoga Jones used to try to get her to do. The blonde woman pushed her now longer blonde hair out of her face and sat back against her cot. She smiled to herself. It had been fun doing yoga with the other inmates, especially when they had struggled... The mirth left her face as she remembered one particular instance when she had bent over only to be met with the view of her ridiculously gorgeous ex-girlfriend looking at her, perfect eyebrows raised. How was she keeping her eyebrows like that in prison, anyway?
It hurt to think about her, so generally she had tried not to. But it was very hard not to. Eventually all roads led back to Vause. The reason why she was here in this shit hole. Well that wasn't all of the truth. Sure if she'd never met her ex she'd probably have kept living her blonde vanilla life the way she had always lived it but...ultimately, she wouldn't give up those memories for anything. She sighed. It definitely wasn't Alex's fault that she was in the SHU. She had Healy and Pensatucky to thank for that. Her fanclub. The anti-lesbian terror group.
She had cried a lot at first. Over Larry and Alex and her failures. The loss of her business and her future. But she had learned very quickly that crying and feeling sorry for yourself gets really old, really fast.
One thing she'd definitely learned in prison was what it was like to be hated. It didn't kill you if you didn't let it. It was something she was learning to shoulder. Of course, that was also part of the reason she forced herself to eat the SHU loaf and why she worked out some part of her body every hour on the hour every other three meal cycles. Three meal cycles = a day or so worth of time so, she worked out every other day, in her room as well as during her hour of outside exercise. It had been too much for her body the first couple of weeks (or what she assumed were weeks) and she'd had to spend a whole week recuperating. But now her body had adjusted to the periodic torturous fitness regimen. And it showed.
She had never really been able to dedicate herself to fitness before, but then she hadn't really been able to dedicate herself to anything. She felt her thoughts swerving dangerously toward the darkness she was always fighting back when there was a knock on the wall adjacent to hers.
She hastily crawled over to the air vent and sat next to it, running her fingers down it in response.
"Hey." A voice said after a moment.
"Hey." Piper said it tentatively. This person had spoken to her a few times before and was liable to stop speaking whenever they got ready, and never responded when Piper tried to initiate contact. She wished she'd talk more often but, the sporadic nature of their conversations was one of the few things she got to look forward to as a result.
"Did you just finish working out again or are you just over their masturbating?"
Piper blushed. She was always taken aback with how blunt she was. Truthfully though, the first time she had called out to her had been during one such session. It had been very embarrassing.
"Just sit-ups this time." She smiled even though the other woman couldn't see it.
"Remember how you yelped when you heard me talking that first time." She chuckled a little after she spoke.
"Yes! Of course I do! I had tried to reach out to you before and when no one responded I assumed that it was because no one was there! Then you decide to casually ask me if 'I'm having fun by myself' and scare the living shit out of me..." Piper laughed and the other woman joined in with her. It was so rare to laugh these days she relished in the feeling.
"To my knowledge you haven't done it again since then."
A wry smile was on Piper's face. "To your knowledge..."
The other woman feigned a gasp. "So you have been! Naughty."
Piper blushed again. She thought she might like whoever was on the other side of the wall but there was no way of knowing who she was or what she looked like. But if the sound of her voice was any indication, she seemed like she was fair game. It was odd, flirting with her. She was sure Alex hadn't thought much of her seeing as how she'd treated her since she'd announced her engagement... and Larry... well they had already talked. It was still very weird to her to be so easy with someone else. Did she even deserve this level of companionship? Was this just more selfishness? But she was in the SHU of all places so it wasn't exactly a lover's paradise...
"I'll take your silence as my answer."
"Ha. That's what I usually do." Piper quipped, glancing back toward the vent.
A moment passed and then another and the woman still hadn't responded. Piper began to fidget. Had she gone too far with that one or something? She never knew when the other woman would abruptly stop talking to her and she was never ready for the conversation to end.
She hastened to make amends. "Hey, I was just kidding, it was just a joke-
"You always apologize to me when I stop talking."
Piper let out a quiet breathe in relief and shrugged. "I always assume it must be something I said."
Vause put a hand on the shower curtain rod to steady herself as the other one pressed Nicki deeper into her dripping sex. The woman looked up at her intensely as she worked her over. Alex glanced at her briefly before throwing her head back.
"Fuck!" She rode the other woman's face slightly as she tried to let herself go. Nicki was working hard. Her mouth enveloped her and 4 of her 5 fingers were at work trying to coax out sweet release. But it wasn't working that day. Every time Alex closed her eyes she thought of blonde hair and pleading eyes and it was starting to take a toll on her sexual high. She looked down at Nicki and tried to focus on her movements but she couldn't meet her eyes. As the guilt and worry picked up speed as they swirled around in her mind, it all began to feel very wrong to be there. With Nicky.
Suddenly she felt like she might cry. Nicki was undeterred as Alex threw her arm up over her face as she tried to pull herself together, trying not to break into violent sobs. Shakily she removed her hand from the back of Nicki's head and gently tapped her forehead, pushing her back a bit.
Nicki licked her lips and looked up at her. "Was that it?"
Alex kept her face covered, taking deep breaths as she tried to calm down. Fortunately, crying and cumming were not all that different to the eye.
"...Yeah, thanks."
Nicki tilted her head to the side, at the odd reaction before pulling back the curtain to the shower to get out; finding herself looking into a pair of very familiar brown eyes.
"What's up, Morello?" She tried to seem nonchalant about the situation but found herself unable to face her and so brushed past her to get her towels with something between a smirk and a grimace. Alex peeked out from under her arm at the brunette who looked at her sadly before her eyes lowered to the ground. Alex just groaned and closed the shower curtain. Turning toward the corner of the shower she quietly turned the water on and just let it dowse her as she listened to the sound of Morello and Nicki yelling outside. Under the cover of the water she finally allowed herself to cry, her tears mingling with the droplets hitting her face and running down her body. After a moment, she gingerly washed herself as the sound of shouting finally came to a stop.
"Piper." It had been a while since she had allowed herself to say the woman's name. She cried at the futility of it all. At first she had wanted to hate her. Now she just wanted to forget her. But she couldn't.
"You seem like a nice and reasonable person."
Piper guffawed and leaned her head against the wall. "That's not true at all."
"Oh?"
"No." She sighed. "I'm selfish and I've used everyone I claimed to love."
"I know."
Blonde eyebrows raised as Piper turned to the vent fully.
"How?"
"I hear you talking shit about yourself all the time, obviously. About the girl you fucked over and your fiancée or whatever...just because I don't offer you a shoulder to cry on every time doesn't mean I'm not listening. So like I said, despite all of that shit, I think you seem like a nice and reasonable person. Only nice and reasonable people can keep from losing their fucking minds down here, girly. People who are filled with only hate and selfishness come down her and thrash and scream themselves into oblivion."
"I guess you know that from experience?"
"The girl on the other side of me just mutters weird shit to herself all the time about killing some asshat named Bobby, or screams weird shit about killing some asshat named body. The only thing that changes on that radio station is the volume. At least with you I hear something about your family or your friends from time to time."
Piper laughed. "Thank you, mysterious disembodied voice."
"You're welcome."
Another pause.
"So, Masturbator, what is it that you think about when you're doing your thing?"
"Wow, really?"
"Really. Is it the schmoe of a fiancé or the hot ex-girlfriend? And don't say both for the love of God."
"It's the hot girlfriend."
"Figures."
"What about you?"
"What about me?"
"Do you...?"
"You don't want to know."
"Why not? You even caught me in the act. I don't know how it could be worse than that. That whimpering shit I do is not cute."
"...It sounds alright."
Piper narrowed her eyes a blush creeping feverishly up her face. "I thought you said...you didn't hear me..."
Silence.
Piper's eyes were wide as she looked at the wall opposite her, bringing her hand to her face. Had she really been listening to her the whole time and...?
Then she found herself scooting closer to the vent. "Do you want to...together...? She lowly intoned.
She heard the person on the other side shifting and then light footsteps in the opposite direction. They were walking away from her.
"Hey!" Piper hit the vent in frustration. "HEY!"
Suddenly, the door swung open causing Piper to jolt and shuffle to her feet. It was Officer Bell.
"Let's go, Chapman. Say goodbye to your little friend." The words dripped with judgment.
Piper briefly considered just walking out. It was the moment she had been anticipating since she had stepped into the little box. She also didn't want to embarrass herself any further in front of Officer Bell but she found herself crouching next to the air vent.
"I'm leaving, okay? Tell me your name before I go?" She asked hopefully but was only met with the same old violent screaming.
Hanging her head, she slowly went to move towards the door before hearing a quiet, "Lucy."
"Oh c'mon Chapman, I don't have all goddamned day here." The older woman tapped her foot as her face showed her obvious displeasure.
"I'm Piper." The woman said as she walked towards the door. "Let's meet again on the outside!" She smiled as she said it, moving aside Bell as she closed the door behind her. Two accompanying officers restrained and cuffed her as they pushed her along towards the exit.
"Can you believe the nerve of her? Being angry like that? Like I'm the bad guy?" Nicky was still venting about Morello as she and Alex sat outside for their recreation period. Alex was staring out into nowhere playing with the grass by her feet as she tried to listen to what she was saying. Around her everyone was buzzing about all lively. It was February now so it was finally getting a little warmer. Janae had started up running around the track again. The track Piper had gotten reopened, Alex remembered sadly.
"She's more hurt than angry." Alex said it softly.
"And?" Nicky scoffed. "How does she think I feel?
"Well if I had to guess, she probably thinks you've moved on."
"Pfft. She's right."
Her dark haired counterpart snapped out of her reverie and looked at her. "Really?"
Nicky shrugged. "Yeah, I mean...I don't cry anymore. I only dream about her once every other week or so. It doesn't hurt near as bad when I see her. So."
Nicky and Alex both looked at each other before bursting into laughter.
"How about you, Vause?" She poked her with a stick. "You getting over Chapman?"
Alex's face darkened as she withdrew into herself. The dreams were growing ever more frequent and violent. She could hardly sleep. Her concern about her had flatlined after seeing she was alright and headed to the SHU but now it was spiking to dangerous levels. Had she hurt herself down there? Gone insane? It had been two months. Was she going to be in prison for a long time now? As long as she would be? And the one question that had been gnawing at her since Christmas. What was she about to tell her? Had she wanted help fighting off Doggett? Alex knew that if Piper had died that night and she had failed to help her she would have never forgiven herself. She wasn't sure if she had forgiven herself now. But she very badly wanted to forget all of it. She didn't want to cry anymore. It was then that she realized it had been a long time since Nicky had asked the question.
"I'm fine. And I don't want to talk about it." She ran a hand through her hair and flicked some grass.
Nicky frowned. "Used to be you couldn't shut up about how much you hated her, Vause. It was annoying but at least I could understand that. But this?" She put a hand up. "This isn't healthy my friend."
"Since when is the way we deal with things healthy?" Alex said dismissively, her tone a bit sharp.
Nicky set her jaw but then slowly turned away from her and nodded. "You're right." She sighed. "All I'm saying is that you need to deal with your feelings for her. Keeping 'em all cooped up inside seems like it's fucking you up."
Alex head snapped toward her. "Oh, like how you deal with your feelings for Morello? Like this morning?"
"Hey, at least I talk about em." Nicky gave Alex a hard look before facing away from her. "That could have been avoided if we'd just do it in the chapel instead." She said it coolly but threw a sidelong glance at Alex.
"We're not doing it in the chapel."
"Why not?"
"Because!" Alex had raised her voice. Nicky raised her eyebrows in mock surprise at her outburst.
"Because?" Nicki tilted her head and waited for an explanation.
"Because..." Alex eased back down. "Because you and Morello used to do it in there.
Nicky immediately scoffed. "Bull. Shit."
"..."
"You don't wanna do it in there because that's when and where you and Chapman used to get your dirty on too. Am I right? And you're not fine, and you're not over it. You've been weird as fuck lately and don't say you haven't cuz ya have and I've noticed."
"Hey why don't you just mind your own business, alright!" Alex yelled. "I don't need to talk about it, I don't want to talk about it, and last time I checked you were in no position to be giving anyone advice about anything that didn't have to do with pussy or cocaine!"
Nicky licked her lips and nodded her head slightly before standing up and dusting herself off. She leaned down till she was eye level with Alex before speaking. "You and me both, sister." She put her hand on the other woman's head. "I guess that's why we get along so well." She chuckled a bit before shaking her head and walking back towards the building.
Alex watched her walk away, her face etched with anger as she cursed and buried her face into her hands. She knew Nichols was right. She needed to see Piper.
Chapman was being half pushed, half dragged through the hallway. Slowly she began to realize that her time in the SHU had been the calm before the storm. Up the corridor, Caputo walked around the corner followed by…Healy. He looked like he hadn't gotten much rest lately and his usually well groomed hair was splayed wildly about his head. His eyes were menacing as they met Chapman's, and he seemed as if he wanted to jump at her. Piper smirked at him as she passed him by.
"Pathetic." She said it under her breath, but the hitch in Healy's gait let her know that he'd heard it. But she also knew that as angry as he likely was, he wouldn't dare approach her in public. Was he upset because they had found out about what he'd done? Was he finally going to lose his job? Chapman smiled to herself. Maybe he'd even get sent to prison.
As she turned down the corner and approached a large wooden door it dawned on her that with Caputo and Healy already behind her that there was only one person she could be headed towards. Dread and anticipation began to fill the pit of her stomach.
One guard let go of her in order to open the door and the other pushed her inside. Piper looked back at it as it closed. In front of her, a woman sat in a chair filing her nails as she took in the blonde woman's vulnerable state.
Figueroa.