Back from the dead! Hope you don't hate me. Here's me giving this a go again.

Sleep didn't come easy that night for Jade. She was up with a sick feeling in the pit of her stomach. She cared for him, she knew that much. The boy with the blue eyes and velvet voice. His coldness came from a place of defensiveness. She knew he wasn't the kind of person who took these things lightly, if there was one thing Sebastian hated, it was being vulnerable emotionally.
A conversation they had months ago in the coffee shop told her that.

"You have a caffeine addiction." His voice made her smile. It hadn't been the best day for her and she was alone at a table trying to forget about her parents.
His face was lit up by his bright blue eyes that seemed to make her problems seem very far away. He wasn't in his usual Warblers uniform but instead wore a maroon shirt and black jeans. He seemed to look good no matter what he wore.
"And that's water in your cup, is it?" She retorted, unable to help the smile that took over her face.
Laughing softly, he slid into the seat opposite her.
"Alone?"
"Technically no. This very persistent boy who seems to live at this place is sitting with me." He broke out into a grin.
"So is he good looking?"
"Fairly."
"I feel like you're understating it."
She couldn't help but laugh. "What brings you here Sebastian? Seemingly constantly."
"Why I keep hoping I might run into you, actually."
"Would it kill you to call?"
"Surprises are nice"
"That depends"
"On what?"
"Whether they're good or bad"
"True enough. How has your day been?" He asked, his eyes guarded. He seemed to sense that something was wrong.
"Not the greatest one I've ever had." She said, smiling hollowly.
"Maybe I can change that. Do you like the beach?"
"I love the beach."
"Let's go to the beach, then."
"What? Right now?"
"Why not?"
She smiled and slid out of the booth. His spontaneity was one of the things that drew her to him.
The drive was pleasant because the weather was the perfect. They rolled down the windows and tore through the roads, laughing at the stunned residents who threatened to call the cops.
It was as good a day as she could've hoped for. Sebastian did all the right things. He took her away to a world that wasn't full of suppressed emotions, nothing seemed to go wrong. It was reckless abandon. It was carefree. It was everything she loved about life.
"Thank you for this." She said sincerely to him. They were sitting on the shore watching the waves. The blues in his eyes matched the sky and the sea and she realized just why exactly she loved them so much. Because they were the colour of freedom, of careless bliss.
He said nothing but smiled and put his arm around her. She leaned into him and the minutes passed in silence only broken by the crashing of the waves on shore and the birds in the sky.
"Can I ask you something?" His voice broke her out of her reverie.
"Yes."
"Why do you find it so hard to trust people?"
The question took her by surprise. Her reaction was to get defensive.
"Why do you think that's the way I feel?"
"Your eyes. There's a look in your eyes."
"Oh, and you're an expert?"
"Kind of."
"What makes you one?"
"I get the same way, if you hadn't noticed." His tone was nonchalant and he seemed indifferent to her reaction. For some reason this bothered her even more.
"You're not an expert on me."
"I never said I was. I just know myself, and I tend to do the same." He said, quieter now.

She struggled with her words, something novel to her but eventually said, "Sometimes I just... I don't know how people will take the truth.. Or what I tell them. It's easier to not trust people than to let them in and have them ruin you."

He didn't say anything after that and the silence made her uncomfortable. She wished he hadn't brought this up, she regretted saying anything.
Finally he began, "When I was in France I met someone. I trusted her with a lot of me. I thought I loved her for a while. She... She used to do this thing where she twisted things. Made me feel terrible for everything I did. Made me feel worthless, like I wasn't good enough at anything I did. She made me feel comfortable and loved, and then made me feel absolutely awful. I.. Went through a period where I just used to leave home, get wasted because I was so full of self hate. I believed her. Everything she said because I trusted her with so much. So I felt like she was telling the truth. After that, I never let anybody in. I made sure to never give anyone the ability to hurt me." He wasn't looking at her but staring straight ahead into the horizon. She didn't look at him. Just let his words sink in.

Finally she took his arm and entwined her fingers in his. "You didn't deserve that." She barely heard her own voice over the waves.
"I know."
There wasn't much to be said to a story like that. She knew this was him letting her in, telling her something about himself that went beyond the surface. This was trust.
So she took a risk.
"When I was twelve my grandmother died in a plane crash and my mum's never been the same ever since.
Because she changed my dad did too. She immersed herself in the kind of socializing that comes only with a lot of money and a house in the Upper East side. She forgot I existed for a while. Hired nannies to make sure I was alive and well fed, sent me off to boarding school until I was 15 and then brought me back because her friends kept asking about me, and she couldn't pretend I didn't exist anymore.
She tried to make me into her perfect daughter but I hated it all- the debutante balls, the brunches, so she resented my existence even more.
The only reason I'm here is because my grandmother didn't want me to grow up without any idea of how the 'rest of the world' lived, so she agreed to send me here as long as I didn't get into any major scandals that would tarnish her reputation.
They just shut me out, for the most part. Ever since I've never felt comfortable to share that part of my life with anybody. I've never told anyone about them, not anyone in my old school, not anyone in this one."
"Jade-" He began, touching her arm, but she continued
"Sometimes I try you know... I try to start a conversation or something... Anything.. But that never goes anywhere." She laughed at how depressing she sounded. It was pathetic. Telling him all of this. Why was she doing it?

He put his arm around her and she pulled away, "I don't need your sympathy" She said, her voice a monotone.
"Who said I was offering any?" He threw back. She took a deep breath. He doesn't want to hurt you.

"Guess we've both got some issues." He said lightly. She knew he wasn't going to let this change anything and in that moment she was relieved.
"I forget mine when I'm with you" she replied honestly, "It's like they don't exist anymore."
"I know what you mean." He said, smiling back at her and taking her hand.
"I'm glad I met you, Smythe."
"Me too, Summers. Me too."

The day had ended with them sitting in mostly silence, watching the sun set and taking walks along the shore. The silences were comfortable now, something she never knew was possible with someone she just met.

He dropped her home and just before she got out, she planted a kiss on his cheek, eliciting a grin that made her night.

It was then that he realized Jade Summers was someone he needed in his life.