Chapter 3.

"Brandon," Callie warned. "I can't do this..."

He leaned in and kissed her hard on the mouth, his breath sweet and warm.

"Brandon..."

He dragged his lips down her neck, sprinkling sloppy kisses. When he hit the right spot, just behind her ear, she felt a gush of wetness pool between her legs. She could feel him, hard against her thigh.

"Okay," she sighed, closing her eyes. "Maybe I can do this for a little while."

She gripped his shoulders as he moved back to her mouth, sucking on her lower lip and weaving his fingers through her hair. For a moment, he paused to look her in the eye, communicating his desire through silence. She laid back on the cool counter, and he slid into her, rocking his hips against her.

Afterward, they sat, panting on the kitchen floor, their backs against the cupboards.

"It was amazing, finally being with you," Brandon whispered, burying his nose in her hair. His skin smelled salty with sweat.

"I know," she nodded, separating her body from his, so there was just enough distance between them. "But it was just sex, nothing more. Okay?" It killed her inside to say those words to him, and it felt like they weren't even coming from her mouth. As she spoke, she purposely avoided his gaze. She knew that she and Brandon could never really have a no-strings-attached, friends-with-benefits relationship. It had to be all or nothing.

"It wasn't 'just sex' for me," he replied, his voice unexpectedly soft. "Callie, when I saw you in that restaurant last night, everything just came flooding back." He reached out to touch her arm, feeling her muscles tense against his fingers. "Seeing you again, I realized that I still have feelings for you."

"I have to get home," she told him, rising to her feet. She began gathering her clothes from the living room floor.

"Callie..." he protested, following her. "I thought you were staying for breakfast?"

"I'm good," she said, as she slipped her lacy thong up her thighs. "I'll grab something later."

"Why won't you just give me a chance?" he asked, the hurt clear in his voice.

Cringing, she turned her back so she wouldn't have to look at him. "I just don't feel the same way. I'll only end up hurting you, Brandon. I don't want to put you through that again."

"But what if I'm willing to take the risk?"

Her bra was tangled. She untwisted it, pulling the straps over her shoulders, then reached back, struggling to hook it.

"Let me..." said Brandon. He stood behind her and connected the hooks. Then, he wrapped his arms around her waist and tenderly kissed her shoulder. "Can I at least see you again?"

She gave him a stern look.

"Just for sex" he added. "I mean, if that's what you want." He kneaded her shoulders, gently massaging them.

She sighed, turning her sundress right-side-out, and pulled it over her head. "I'll think about it."

Two Years Earlier:

The pool-house was dark and damp. Callie sat in the corner, her knees pulled to her chest. Her eyes welled with tears as the memories filled her head; they came when she was alone. She though about the way Stef would brush her hair back before she kissed her goodnight. The way Lena always hugged her as if she hadn't seen her in years, even if she was just coming home from group. And Jude... she missed him so much, it physically hurt her, right in the chest. She just wanted the pain to go away. The pain inflicted by betrayal, in knowing her own father was the person who ruined her life.

She had to make it stop. Even if it was just for a little while.

She fished the joint and the lighter from the pocket of her jeans, and carefully lit up. When the flame caught, she took a pull of the acrid, yet sweet, smoke. She coughed at first, then the burning in her throat dissipated. She inhaled again. Suddenly, yet slowly, the world around her began to change, as if she were Alice, falling into Wonderland.

"What do you think you're doing, young lady?"

Callie looked up, groggily, and saw Robert standing in the doorway, his hands on his hips.

She rubbed her eyes sleepily. "Hi, daddy," she slurred. The pool behind him sparkled, a rainbow of every shade of blue known to man. She reached out as if she could touch it, and she fell forward on the hard floor, bursting into a fit of giggles.

"Give me that," said Robert, sternly. He reached out and took the joint, snuffing out the flame.

"No!" she cried. "I needthat... giveit...back."

"Don't you dare come into the house like this," he told her. Then, he turned and crossed the yard.

Once he was gone, Callie curled up in a fetal position, the dizziness overcoming her. She laid and waited, until her high finally wore off and the world sucked again. She couldn't help but feel a little let down; that little taste of happiness had slipped away all too quick. Maybe it was never even real in the first place?

She stood up, and went into the house, where Robert was waiting for her, giving her a hard look.

"What if Sophia had come in there instead of me?" he asked her, looking her square in the eye. "She worships the ground you walk on. Would you really want her to imitate that?"

Callie unlocked the door as quietly as possible, and slid into the dorm. She was hoping to avoid Caitlin until she could change her clothes, but her friend was sitting on the couch, watching CNN and eating a Pop tart.

Caitlin eyed Callie carefully, looking over her wrinkled dress, worn the night before. Her face lit up with a playful smirk. "Ooh... am I witnessing somebody's first Walk of Shame?"

Callie sighed. "In so many ways."

"Was he good?" her friend asked. "Is he big? I bet he is. He has big feet."

"I don't want to talk about it," Callie told her, escaping to her room. Once she was inside, she flopped down on the bed, burying her face in her pillow.

"Callie?" said Caitlin, letting herself into the room.

"I should have locked the door," she mumbled in reply.

"Sweetie, what's wrong?" her friend asked apologetically. "I didn't mean to embarrass you."

"It's not that," she told her, her voice muffled by the pillow.

"Did he turn into a douche?" She sat down heavily on the edge of the bed.

"No!" She always felt the need to defend Brandon.

"Then what happened?" she pushed. "Did he say anything?"

Callie rolled over, aware of the hickey prominently displayed on her neck. "He said he still has feelings for me. I think he wants a relationship."

"Yeah," said Caitlin. "Not seeing the problem."

She fingered the hickey, blushing."I told him what we had was just sex."

Caitlin gave her a horrified look. "What did you do that for?"

"I just got a little freaked out," she confided. "So I told him I don't feel the same way."

"But you do feel the same way," Caitlin pointed out. "You always have."

"You don't understand," she sighed. "Everything with Brandon is always so intense. I can't handle that right now, and I don't want him to get hurt."

"I know this isn't what you want to hear," said Caitlin, eying her carefully. "But think you're the one who doesn't want to get hurt."

Callie gave her a disgruntled look. "Thank you, Dr. Phil."

"You know what?" her friend asked, annoyed. "Sometimes I think you want to be miserable, because you hate your life. But you have a chance to be happy, this time. Maybe seeing Brandon again was fate? He could be the best thing that ever happened to you, if you gave him half a chance."

She stood up. "I think you're really going to regret this, Cal."

She turned to walk away, then paused before leaving the room. "Oh, yeah. Sophia called last night. She wants you to call her back."

Once she was alone, Callie took her phone from her pocket, and dialed the Quinn's number, hoping Jill wouldn't be the one to answer.

"Hello?"

It was Robert. Between him and his wife, he was definitely the lesser of two evils.

"Uh, yeah," she said. "It's Callie."

"Oh. Hi, honey. How are you?"

"Fine," she replied.

"Are you enjoying your classes?"

"Yes," she answered.

There was an awkward pause where neither of them spoke. "Is Sophia there?" she finally asked. "And if so, can I speak to her?"

"I don't know," he chuckled. "Can you?"

She sighed, growing frustrated. She hated when he tried to be funny. "May I speak to her?"

"Hold on. She just walked in the door." He called to his daughter. "She's coming."

"Thanks."

"Okay, then. I love you."

She felt like she was obligated reciprocate, but her tongue stuck to the roof of her mouth. She believed Robert truly did love her, but she could never find it in her heart to say it back. Maybe she could've, if he hadn't done what he did?

Seconds later, Sophia was saying hello in her usual, bubbly voice.

"Hey," said Callie. "What's up?"

"I just got home from violin lessons," she replied. "Hey... where were you last night? You said you'd call me."

"I know I did, Soph," she apologized. "I'm sorry. I was out with a friend, and I lost track of time."

"Friend as in boyfriend?" Sophia teased.

"What makes you ask that?" Callie wondered. "I could've been out with one of the girls."

"A., you never go out," Sophia reminded her. "And B., Caitlin would have been with you."

She sighed. "Fine. You got me."

They chatted for a while, until Sophia said she had to go. Callie told her she loved her, then hung up.

But she didn't put her phone down. It was mid-morning on a Sunday. Jude would probably be home. She dialed the Foster's number, her hand shaking.

"Callie?" Stef had answered the phone.

Callie sat still, as tears filled her eyes. This was precisely why she always hesitated before calling that number; she always cried, and she hated crying.

"Baby, are you there?" She sounded concerned.

"Um, yeah," she finally answered, her voice shaking. "I'm here."

"It's so good to hear your voice," Stef mussed.

A hot tear slipped down Callie's cheek, and then another. "Yeah. Yours too."

"We miss you, babe. Come down and visit us soon, yes?"

"I'll try," she said, in a choked voice. Stef had to know she was crying by now. "Can I talk to Jude?"

"Of course," she warmly replied. "I'll put him on the line."

"Thanks."

"I love you, sweetheart," said Stef, lingering over her words.

Callie nodded, even though the older woman couldn't see her. Her gums ached, a phenomenon that always happened when she cried. "Yeah. I love you too."

"Jude is on. I'm going to hang up."

She could hear Jude breathing, but he didn't say hello. Their calls always went like this. She talked, he listened.

"Hi, baby. It's me... sissy."

She didn't know what she was waiting for; she knew he wouldn't answer.

"I just wanted to say hi," she told him. "And, I love you. God, I wish I could hear you say it back."

It was difficult, carrying on a one-sided conversation. Callie wished she was better at it, for him, but she didn't know how to make it work. She really did try. Eventually, she gave up. "I have to go now, Judicorn. But I'll talk to you again soon, okay? I love you. Bye."

She heard a click, then a dial tone.

After speaking to Jude, she always felt empty inside, as if something hadn't been fulfilled that should have been. Her heart squeezed with guilt and sadness. She laid down on her side, setting her phone down next to her. She was tired, from lack of sleep, and a dull ache pulsed against her temple. The phone buzzed, startling her as she began to doze off.

She picked it up, and looked over the text. It was from Brandon: So, exactly how soon can I see you again?

To Be Continued