This chapter is my favorite so far...so please! review! a thumbs up, a sad face, a meh, a perfect, a keep trying... whatever! just to rate how bad or good i was hahaha.

Everything was dark...

His head was spinning and he couldn't feel his arms. The distant sound of a howl warning him that he was deep into the forest.

He opened his eyes and a full red moon greeted him.

"Awww! what a shame, I have to go now." a sweet feminine voice whined, you could hear the pouting in her tone.

That finally woke him completely. He tried to stand up, but sharp pain in his arms stopped him. He lowered his gaze and found that both of his arms were severed from the elbow.

"NO! NONONONO! You fucking bitch! I'm gonna kill ya!"

The girl laughed merrily and kicked him in the stomach.

"Kill me? With your on bare hands?" She laughed again, but stopped abruptly when another howl -this time he could hear it more closer- broke their conversation.

"Playing with my food? Pfft, look who's talking..." The girl whispered indignantly to herself.

The girl stepped into his view and he was surprised to see a petite blonde girl with a long braid; a beige cardigan and blue skinny jeans. She was smiling, she could have looked like an angel if it wasn't for the red eyes and the fangs that peeked from the corner of her lips.

But he was too scared to notice anything else but her eyes... those pits of fire, looking him hungrily.

"N-no... please n-no I- I a-am s-sorry! I will n-not do it again!" He tried to beg for his life; but the girl just stalked towards him.

"I'm sure you wouldn't do it again... but I am hungry, and you still have to pay for what you did." She said in a cold tone, a look of disgust in her pretty face.

Before he could even process what was happening, the girl already had him grabbed by his left shoulder with her claws. And then, in a swift movement, she had her mouth in his neck... drinking his life.

While Seras was distracted 'eating'; two red eyes hid in the shadows, watching her intently. Hans had developed a sick pleasure in watching when Seras was feeding. And not because he craved for human blood... but because he craved for her. Every time that Seras drank from a human, she would start to smell different; an endearing fragrance coming from her skin. She would act different, more effeminate. Even her body would change. When walking, her hips would sway, her breast would become even more round and pronounced; Her voice would become even more sweet, like a lullaby, and her lips would look red and plump.

All of her becoming even more desirable.

But it was a torture. Seras wasn't aware of this... And even, at first, he didn't know what was happening. He recognized a female in heat... but a vampire in heat? That was certainly something new to him. Why would a vampire go into heat? Vampires can't have offspring, everyone knew that. Whatever it was, he never pondered more on the thought, he just liked to be with her.

Seras, on the other hand, knew that she was being watched; She always was aware when he was near.

He always accompanied her when hunting. They would go together to the city, pick her victim, and bring them to the forest near their house. It was a quiet, dark and lonely place, where no one could hear their screaming.

She loved to leave her victims in the forest, make them think that they had a chance to scape from her; sometimes she would make them see horrible things and leave them psychologically broken. And then, of course, drain them from their sweet blood.

Hans didn't like her methods, he would scold her for being a little to cruel and 'playing with her food'. But she would always defend herself by saying that those people deserved it...and that it was fun.

Seras dropped the dead body and stomped on its head.

Hans -who was in his wolf form- ran with all his inhuman speed towards Seras, trying to grab her by the waist with his jaws; but Seras jumped, and Hans unable to stop himself, end up crashing in a nearby tree. Seras giggled and sprinted towards him, jumping on his back and wrapping her left arm on his neck; bringing the back of his head closer to her, she lifted her right hand and brusquely rubbed her fist in the center or his head.

Seras laughed happily, rejoicing in his frustration for not being able to catch her off guard.

But her moment didn't last long. Hans rolled on his back, making Seras to loose her grip on his neck. He quickly got up, and took Seras by the waist. Seras squeaked in surprise when Hans lifted her. He started to walk back to the house.

"And again, I vin." Hans mocked Seras, who was glaring at him through her looked like a rag doll; her long braid -that he suspected, she wore it like that because of the dead mercenary- brushing the ground.

"It's not fair!" Seras cried indignantly. "You win only because I don't use my full powers." She huffed and squirmed in his grip.

Hans brushed his tongue on her belly, tickling her. Seras shivered and chuckled giving him a playful smack on the side of his head.

Seras recalled how the first month of living under the same roof was very awkward for both of them; But now, they would spend all of their time together, most of that time fooling around in the forest just for fun.

From time to time Seras mind would drift back to Alucard, and strangely Hans always seemed to sense it; so he was always there to cheer her up, in his own unique ways of course.

Like letting her pet him in his wolf form, that always worked to make her feel better. In fact, she loved Hans wolf form, it was so...so powerful, and ancestral. His fur was so soft; she imagine that if clouds could be touched, they would feel like his fur; It gave her a sense of warm and protection, like a mother's hug... And his eyes. They were as red as hers but strangely they projected a whole different feeling; actually, they could project A LOT of feelings. Hans face rarely showed emotion, or it was just minimal, but if you looked in his eyes you could tell what was in his mind.

Yes, Hans wolf-form always made her feel a lot much better when she was on a foul mood; however, nothing was better then seeing him smile with those baby blue eyes... they reminded her of when she was human.

One of Hans smiles was more than enough to make her day... hell! Her week. But Seras was always behaving awkward around him; always blushing or being tomboyish when near him. She couldn't help it, really, he was so handsome and a gentleman to her.

She wouldn't said it aloud, but Hans made her feel all sappy and giddy.

THAT is why she preferred his wolf-form.

While Seras was fantasizing about Hans and his wolf-form; He, on the other hand, was thinking about how much their relationship had changed over the last six months.

The first weeks Seras would be rather shy and wary around him; After a whole month, Seras finally got out of her shell and started being her true self.

Hans liked the shy and cute Seras; but he preferred a hundred times more the cheerful, humorous and outgoing Seras.

But lately, something had been bothering him.

Seras would prefer to spent time with him when in his wolf-form, than in his human form. It wasn't that he didn't liked to transform, quite the opposite. But it seemed that Seras preferred him like that, and he resented it.

Did she thought him ugly? Or maybe he wasn't her ty-

"Hey, are we going to the fair?" Seras asked.

Oh yeah, the carnival; he had forgotten about that.

"Ja."

Seras smile grew from ear to ear. It had been years since she visited a carnival! 60 years to be exact. She wished that she could still have been able eat cotton candy, that would have made the experience even more meaningful.

When they arrived to the house Hans released Seras; who was now drenched all over her waist area by Hans' saliva. She looked down at herself and made a face.

"Ew! Now I have to take a bath..." She frowned at Hans and stuck out her tongue.

Hans switched back to his human form and smirked to Seras. She sighed and quickly made her way back to the house.

"I'll be ready in 10 minutes!" She called back, poking her head through the door frame.

Hans just nodded and stared back at the doorway, where Seras had entered a few moments ago. He, a two hundred and fifty years old werewolf, the last of his kind. He, who had been in both sides of the war. He, who had fought against entire armies. He, who had fought against the very same No-Life king. He, who had been in uncountable battles and had saw the most gruesome and gory scenes... Anyone would say, that after everything, he was a fearless being.

A few months ago they would have been right... but now, they would be completely wrong.

He was afraid of something... he was afraid of rejection.

Afraid of being rejected by Seras.

The moment they arrived to the fair, Seras face brightened dramatically. Her eyes were wide with awe, and a big innocent smile spread across her pink lips.

She took Hans hand and ran to the entrance. She shoved the money to the cashier and snatched away their entrance tickets. They ended up in the middle of the fair, with Seras looking around frantically.

"I don't know where to go first!" She cried, quite conflicted with her indecision.

"Vhat about the bumper cars." Hans said, pointing to the aforementioned game.

"Ah! Yes!" Seras jumped a little in her excitement.

Again, she dragged Hans trough the crowd until they made it to the mechanical game. After riding different games several times, Hans was getting hungry -and a little dizzy, tho he wouldn't say it aloud; they had ride the roller coaster 8 times- So Seras was left alone wandering trough the different fair games.

After a walking a while, in a very darkened and lonely area of the fair, something caught Seras attention. It was a tent, a big tent; it looked like it was made with a lot of carpets sew it together. It was a mix of Baroque and Victorian era patterns, with red, golden, wine and deep purple colors. The only light source was a hand-shape shoji lamp; it illuminated a worn wooden sign with fancy old letters that read:

'Carmen: Fortune Teller'

Seras was very curious... No. Extremely curious about the place. The entrance of the tent was open, so it was obvious one could enter, but there seemed that no one else in the fair was around; maybe because it was pretty dark and the fog seemed more thick in the area. And what if the fortune teller could really tell her fortune? She was a vampire, who lived with a werewolf... so what if psychics were real? Or even better! What if the the fortune teller was a witch!... wait, what if witches didn't liked vampires?

Now Seras wasn't so sure if it was a good idea to go and investigate; it wasn't that she couldn't defend herself (is pretty obvious that she can) but, she didn't liked to engage on unnecessary fights, or ones that could prevent. Ans also Hans was waiting for her.

'Well I don't have anything to lose... besides I will be quick.' Seras smiled while she encouraged herself.

When she made it to the entrance she was amazed by all the things that were inside the tent. There were tall antique bookshelves everywhere, there were filled with books of all sizes and colors. there were small and large vases on the floor, as well as brightly colored vases, filled with what she could smell, herbs and concoctions in the shelves. there were posters and pictures with symbols unknown to her. shoji lamps of all sizes and colors hung from the ceiling, giving a dim orange light; there were also amulets and figures of animals and plants made from shiny stones hanging all over the place. in a brown wooden table there were stacks and stacks of ancient books. the whole place smelled of herbs, incense and old paper; Seras also noticed that everything seemed to have a messy order.

"Hello! Is someone home?" Seras called cheerfully.

When no one called back, Seras walked further into the tent; until she reached the end. In the middle of everything there was a 5 foot pendulum, with an eye in the end. The eye was made of different shades of green fragmented crystals. both corners of the eye ended in a intricate pattern, like the branches of a vine. Above and under the eye were two red jewels... that looked like real rubies.

Seras felt draw to the eye, just wanting to hear the to and fro of the rare sculpture.

'Tick Tock

The eye started to turn red. She started to hear whispers...come...

Tick Tock

All around her was starting to fade, darkness swallowing everything but the red eye... come here...

Tick Tock

...Touch the eye... Seras walked absently closer to the eye. With every step she took, the voices less distant and more clearer... It's an abomination!...

Seras gasped and stopped, she took several steps back. The words were shouted, like a fading memory in her head, by Alucard. But, she doesn't remember Alucard saying anything like that... at least not to her.

"Oh my! I'm sorry! Who's looking for-" An elderly voice called, but stopped to gasp when she saw Seras.

Seras turned around to see a skinny woman. Her skin was dark, like someone who spend a lot of time in the sun; her eyes were a vivid green and she wore a long black skirt, with an orange blouse. Her hair was gray, styled on a messy bun grabbed by two chopsticks. She also had a lot of necklaces and rings on both hands.

"Oh dear! Who let you uncovered!" The remark was not aimed to Seras, but to the pendulum. The old lady passed Seras and covered with a thick brown leather blanket the now unmoving eye.

She turned to Seras and smiled; not fazed at all by the intruder. Who, was still a little dazed by what she had heard.

"Well, hello there young lady! Please have a seat!" The old lady pointed behind Seras.

Seras turned and saw a little round table with a red clothe and two chairs. She took a seat. The old lady took the other, facing Seras.

"But how rude of me! My name Is Carmen! What's your name pretty lady?" Now Seras could hear the heavy Spanish accent on the woman.

"Oh... I.. I'm Seras! Seras Victoria." Seras said proudly.

"So tell me, what do you wanna know. Future, past or present?" Carmen folded her hands and waited.

"Oh, I am really sorry. I was just wandering around and I came across this place... I don't really wanna know about my fortune..." Seras said sheepishly, felling ashamed of herself for wasting the time of the old lady.

"Nonsense!" The old lady exclaimed. "You came here by a reason, even if you are not aware of it! And is my duty to help you! Now... tell what was been bothering you young miss."

Seras was dumbfounded. This lady wanted to hear her problems?... well, she hadn't really talked to anyone about how she felt after and before... Hellsing. Hans was a good friend, but Hans was Hans; and above everything...a man. He had offered, yes, but it just didn't felt right to tell him about her feelings so openly.

But this old lady...Carmen, the fortune teller; looked very reliable and surely she would have a good advice for her.

"Ok... Well... I don't know were to start..." Seras said.

"Do not hurry my dear; I can tell that you have a great pain in your heart... a man? Yes..and...death.." Carmen whispered sagely. Seras tried not to look surprise, a lot of people suffered from love... and a lot of people died everyday. The old lady could have guessed that.

Carmen continued.

"The death of a loved one, it was...a teacher, a mother and a friend. Yes... and you suffer from love... an unrequited love..." Carmen eyes saddened, sympathizing with Seras.

Seras looked away and nodded.

"But, someone has been made his way to your heart...even if you don't accept it." Seras eyes widened and turned to look to Carmen, who was smiling knowingly.

"Well, that's all I can tell without my cards!... do you want to hear more?" Carmen asked in a mysterious tone.

"Yes... Yes, I want to hear more." Seras was not completely sure if the lady could really tell the fortune; but she didn't have anything to lose if she hear what the lady had to say, right?

"Very well." From down the table, the old lady grabbed an old wooden box. She opened the box and took a deck of cards. After distributing twenty two cards all over the table, she looked at Seras with a serious expression.

Without taking her eyes from Seras, she moved her hand and turned one card. Seras tried not to feel intimidated; but she felt, that in the moment she accepted to hear more, something changed. Seras didn't waver to look Carmen directly in the eyes, ready for any kind of mental or physical attack.

"You have killed, you are surrounded by death... but you do it out of necessity...a necessity to survive." Seras tensed by the bold statement of the gipsy woman. Carmen just stared at Seras.

"I'm just a fortune teller, dear... not the police." A playful smirk crossed her face.

"You were reborn, at an early age ... you were only a kid. orphaned at an even more early age. your past has returned, it's chasing you."

"Something. No, someone..." her eyes widened. "this is not good." she muttered in Spanish. she looked around the tent, her eyes fell on a white desk she nodded to herself and continued.

"You have to be very careful of what you do, who you talk to and where you go. he is very dangerous ... am I wrong?" Carmen took Seras hand.

"no ... he's dangerous." Seras said on a quiet tone.

"You have mixed feelings for him, isn't it?"

"... yeah." Seras sighed.

"Why?" Carmen asked, genuinely intrigued.

"He is a monster" Seras spat the word 'monster'

"He always wanted me to be a monster as well. I'm not a monster!" a steely determination in her voice.

"...He would never see me as an equal. He would always despise me. And he loves someone else...but still ... I couldn't help to fall in love with him... and I know it's not healthy..." Her eyes started to water, she looked down to her lap and sniffed. "I am a sick person, I know."

"Do not beat yourself my dear ... you and him, know each other for a long time ... how to say? working, living together?"

"Yes... something like that."

"And you've never thought that maybe it was just an obsession? fixation? a need for affection? Not necessarily love? tell me, how many men have you been with?" Seras blushed furiously.

"Yeah, I tough so." Carmen chuckled. "Life has never been kind to you. You are a fighter, you never give up. You have something that he doesn't have. That's why he treats you like that. Do you feel that you owe him something perhaps?"

"It's complicated..." a distant look crossed Seras face. "He took something very important from me... but he gave me something very special in exchange..." Seras spoke softly. He had killed her cold-blooded, and forced her to make a quick decision. But at the end, Alucard never leave her. Ignored her, yes; mocked her, yes. But she was never left alone... And he also gave her a family; a very wicked and little family. But a family nonetheless.

And she had never been on a relationship...a true sentimental relationship. The thing with Pip was tragic and ephemeral. But what she could do? Is not like she could go out and date anyone she liked; what if she fell in love with a human who was no virgin? Or what if they didn't accepted her for being a vampire? It wasn't like you met a vampire everyday!... and she surely did not wanted to turn someone else into a vampire, just to spend the eternity together... that was very selfish.

Maybe her little crush for Alucard grow to something else because they used to spend ALL the time together. After all they were the only vampires in Hellsing; and they worked together, and he was her master... But what relationship they could have anyway? She practically knew nothing from Alucard. I mean, she knew his human life, but thanks to history books; Alucard never liked to talk about his past. And he was so old, so powerful... He didn't have any humanity left. But Seras on the other hand...

And she was afraid to end up like him... without a goal, without a reason to live; just be there... just existing. She was way past over her fear of becoming a monster... but becoming dull and empty, that was what terrified her! One thing led to another. One day you woke up and you are killing innocent people just to past the time.

And what does Alucard knew about her? Nothing. He used to ask her about her nocturnal activities, but that was just because he was bored. Seras was being unrealistic when she fell in love with Alucard... and she knew that.

In all her internal turmoil, Seras didn't realize that the gipsy woman had left her chair and had returned with a black necklace in her hands.

"Young miss." The old lady spoke softly. "Take this. It will protect you." Carmen handed the necklace to Seras. The necklace chain was black; and hanging from the middle was a black spade with a white eye in the center. Seras looked that the eyes was filled with some kind of liquid and the pupil was a black diamond.

"I'm sorry, but I can't-" Seras knew how a genuine diamond looked like when she saw it, and this one certainly was real.

"Nonsense! You need it, I don't. And you should know better than to say 'no' to a gipsy!" Carmen advised, narrowing her eyes.

"O-ok... Thank you, I guess." Seras quickly put the necklace in her neck. 'at least it's not made from silver'

"Now... what about the other gentleman?" The old lady wriggled her eyebrows suggestively. She grabbed another card and turned it around. "A German... a very wild German boy, eh?"

Seras looked around nervously. Did the lady know about Hans being a werewolf!? Why did she stressed the word 'wild' ?!

"Wild? What do you mean?" She faked ignorance.

"Well, it's more like passion...yes. He is very passionate, stubborn and protective... But he is very...mmmh... closed? Yes! He is not easy to read and can be very distant." Seras couldn't hide her surprise this time; that was Hans!

"But unlike your other loverboy... He will open up with the time." Carmen ended with a smile and a nod.

"You should be patient an fight for him. You should never, NEVER, leave his side. He's a strong ally and a very good friend. But! Be very careful of how you treat or act around him; he might misunderstand actions or words. And if he feels betrayed he will leave you."

Seras was really surprise by the prediction of Hans made by Carmen. It seemed very accurate. But it made her feel a little bad too; she wondered how badly they had hurt Hans emotionally, to end up like that. She knew that Hans liked to speak his mind and that he did not liked to be lie.

"Oh my!" Carmen said quite excited when she turned another card. "Your future my dear!" She smiled happily.

"What do you see?" Seras asked as excited as Carmen and clasped her hands together, smiling like a child in Christmas.

"I see six beautiful children!" Seras face fell. Children? Really? Seras arched an eyebrow and wondered if the lady had just been lying to her all this time.

"Six children, and!... five wolfs?... yes! Five wolfs!" Seras observed the lady and was surprised to found a mad smile on her face... like one her former master would wear when killing FREAKS. Seras huffed in disappointment. So the lady was a sham... how dumb of her, seriously.

"You will live on a castle! And die peacefully at the old age of eighty!" Now the lady, was almost screaming from her excitement and had a weird look in her eyes.

She stood up and started to dance around Seras humming a tone. Seras just watched bewildered. What the hell?

"Mom!" Seras turned to the voice and saw a young girl, not much older then her (in appearance of course.) looking exasperated to the dancing lady. The girl noticed Seras and gasped; she hurriedly made her way to stand in front of Seras with a worried face.

"Did she tell you that she was a fortune teller?" The girl asked.

Seras just nodded.

"Oh my god." the girl face palmed herself. "look I'm really sorry...but my mom it's not a fortune teller... she's a little 'cuckoo'." the girl moved her finger in circular motion near her temple.

So the lady was crazy? So everything she had said... was a lie? Seras felt very disappointed and stupid.

"Did she asked you for money? I will return it to you, so don't worry...and I am really sorry." The girl blushed a little and looked to her mother. She sighed and told her something in Spanish. Carmen stopped dancing and just nodded; she exited the tent, still dancing and humming an unknown melody.

"No, don't worry. She didn't asked for money, and she was really nice... I had a fun time in fact." Seras laughed and rubbed the back of her neck.

After saying a farewell; Seras existed the tent and started to walk to the reunion point.

"I haf been looking for you everyvhere..." Seras looked up to Hans. He had an almost imperceptible frown.

"I'm sorry Hans... I lost track of the time." Seras smiled tiredly. Hans didn't missed it.

"Are felling vell? Do you vant to go home?" Hans sat besides her.

Seras looked to Hans for a long time, an unreadable expression in her face. Until she finally spoke.

"Can I hug you?" Seras asked in a very neutral tone; but there was something in her eyes...sorrow and pain. Hans just looked surprised; which made Seras smile softly. Hans nodded absently.

Seras hugged Hans for what it felt like centuries; but neither of them cared... they just enjoyed each other touch. One wishing to never let go. The other, wishing to be loved in return.

*i tried to picture the inside of the tent like Howl's room (From Howl's moving castle of course.)*

I made this chapter at 3 am... it was super odd because the first 4 days i was like "damn i have to write! and i don't know where to start." and then yesterday i woke up at 3 am, super inspired and well, here's the result :D

i wanted to make Seras a little naive... like, i mean, she spend 50 years working for Hellsing... and i don't think they let her go out and hang around London streets you know?... and well the magic of Seras is her childlike personality; that's why we love her, right?

And right now, our poor captain is in the so infamous 'friendzone'.

I hope this chapter works to know a little better why Seras feels so conflicted about Alucard... He was an asshole to her, but she still "loved" him. and she knew she was being a masochist! it's not healthy! and she knows that... so she feels guilty. And also, she was always with him... she never knew other guys besides the soldiers (and if we take the wild geese as reference...well, they weren't very gentlemanly to her.) so how is she going to know what real love is like? Seras is a newbie in love...so she's just confused. let's gave her sometime :)