It was one of those beautifully awkward nights. The mood was just right. There was SSB4 playing in the background, the house was a complete mess and there was gumdrops spilled on the floor courtesy of Axl. Pretty sure those would be hard to clean up. Then there was us. Half naked in my bed right on the Spiderman pillow and the Apollo Justice plushie that always seemed to have a look of disapproval every time things got physical. But something was different today and I don't know why. It wasn't me. It wasn't me being the awkward andrew of the room. Nope that was all Axl over here. Staring off into the distance like he was contemplating something intense. I turned over and sighed.

"Alright why're you being an awkward Andrew?" I said suddenly. Axl turned to look at me and then his expression completely changed. He was now making his regular face.

"Me?! Awkward and a Andrew? Rock maybe you're being an Assuming Allison?" Axl said as he laid on the pillow looking up at the ceiling with one of his smirks.

I was not convinced. I was sure I had the art of reading Axl down to a tea since this whole relationship started. I've seen all those expressions and feels as though out all the stuff that happened to us over time. Was he disappointed or like...was he just like thinking...or what. Why would he be disappointed we just did it...like what else do you want from me? I know I've never been the best at this type of stuff but he always seemed to be okay with it. We do things in a pretty good patturn...I liked it. It wasn't anything complicated...or freaky...no wierd shit. But what if that was the problem. That's when it hit me...was Axl tired of ...the same thing every time? Was he tired of ya know...me? I feel incompetent all of a sudden. I mean before this whole thing I hadn't really done it...ya know with anyone else...god why am I even getting nervous about this stuff in my head. I'm an adult goddamnit. This shouldn't be hard to think about. Be honest with yourself Rock. You, are...boring,him. Ouch that hurt more than I thought it would.

Looking at Axl now just confirmed it for myself. He pulled out a gameboy advance and started playing Pokemon. Right after sex though?! I'm a little bit offended now. No he did just not pull out that Pokémon. That was a slap to the face...well atleast it wasn't Animal Crossing. But still...argg what am I supposed to do... He's probably had people over 9000 times better than me...why am I trying to entertain myself with dumb dragon ball Z jokes...this is sad.

"A-Axl I see you're playing Pokémon." I splirted out. He turned to me and shifted his head.

"Yeah I'm trying to level up my Fire types." Axl said not taking his eyes off the screen.

"Don't you want to do something else?" I asked. Now I was sure of it.

"No this is sorta serious. Oh wait, you mean like finishing that SSB4 match we left on in the living room?" Axl said as if his face got lightened up. Yep it was like if Axl completely doubted that I could be provocative like there was two modes with no in between in our relationship. Like we were just friends who just had sex occasionally and when we did we never talked about it and when it happened it was the same thing every time and I was the only one who was cool with it everytime and then my partner was just playing it off because he thought that's how that I took it and he's bored of me and he pulls out Pokémon after fucking me because I'm boring in bed. OH SHIT. I NEED TO FIX THIS. At that point I was mentally freaking out to myself. Axl was looking in my direction with a raised eyebrow.

"Rock...are you good man?"

"You..." I started but finished the rest in my head. You don't think I'm appealing anymore. I sighed to myself.

"I?" Axl asked.

"You aren't satisfied are you?" I said suddenly without knowing it came from my mouth. Axl looked like I struck a nerve. Like I hit a point he'd been hiding.

"What makes you think that?" He said in a quiet tone. He saved and then closed the pokemon and set it down and looked me straight in the face.

"You pulled out Pokémon after sex." I stated. Axl just looked at me if I was silly.

"Er well..." Axl said looking down.

"Do you know how that feels? I'm all satisfied over here and then you go and pull out Pokémon after SEX?" I could feel my voice raising volume.

"Rock it's not like that..." Axl's voice trailed off.

"Then what is it like?" I said. Yep I was officially angry. Axl was on the defensive still trying to say that he was withdrawn.

"I can't say it." Axl said.

"Why not? You've already offended me enough. Just go ahead and say it, I'm not good enough!" I said. yep I was yelling at this point.

"Rock..." Axl started. I cut him off.

"Nope. Say it. You're unsatisfied." I said.

"Fine. Whatever. You know what? Go ahead and think that. Put yourself down. I'm leaving. It's too late in the night for this shit." Axl said getting up from the bed putting on his pants. I clinched the cover.

"Leave then and you know what? Maybe go find of those EXs of yours, maybe they'll do a better job then me and I'm not saving your SSB4 data." I said bitterly. Axl turned around at that point, he was genuinely hurt. His face turned into one of intense irritation. I knew this was going to get bad.

"You know what Rock? You want me to admit it? Fine. I've had highschool sex better than what we have. If you're gonna be an asshole let me tell you about yourself." Axl said. Now he was yelling. That really hurt I'm not going to lie. Actually hearing it made me feel like I got stabbed.

"So go ahead, If I'm so bad why're you still here?" I said bitterly. Axl stopped and grinned to himself.

"Well maybe because you meant more than those random girls and just because sex isn't amazing doesn't mean that I'm just going to up and leave you. But the way you're acting right now I'm not seeing it. So bye." Axl said walking and turning to the door. I was angry at myself but also angry at Axl. I didn't have anything else left to say that last sentence stuck the chainsaw into my back.

"Axl, I hope you call up one of those bitches and get demonic aids." I yelled as Axl walked out my door out into the night. Axl turned around and smiled then walked towards me.

"You know Rock, I was gonna say fuck you but...if I did that, I wouldn't cum." He yelled in my face then slammed the door in my face. He walked out into the night. I opened the door and followed him and he turned around. I spoke

"Axl, your hair isn't shit and half the jokes you make aren't funny. You're a fucking slacker, you barely do anything right and I'm done with you." I said suddenly.

"Oh you're done? Well let me say this. Have fun masturbating for the rest of your sad shut in life." Axl said shrugging.

"Erase my number, I don't want to see you anymore." I said in a low tone. Axl looked at me closer. The grin left his face.

"Are you serious?" Axl said. I nodded.

"I'm done." I said plainly.

"You're serious." Axl said.

"Get out of here." I said. At that moment my mind wasn't keeping up with my actions.

"I guess I fucked this one up as well. Guess I owe Zero money now." Axl muttered before starting his car and leaving. I looked down until he left when he did it felt empty. I could feel tears swelling up in my eyes. Like all the insults from earlier had finally just hit me. The tears were coming down my face. It was a sort of cold night I felt the wind chill. God I was pathetic. Here I am in my boxers standing in front of my door with tears coming down my face. I was about to go back inside when suddenly my neighbor opened his door and looked out. He was the old man who was staying next door. He was a pretty nice dude, he always helped when I did something stupid like lock myself out of my house or car or when I needed a jump or something.

He always had cool cardigans. He opened the door and I looked over. I wondered what I must've looked like. I was a wreck I knew that. I was crying I knew that and I was in my underwear. Not a good combination. The old man spoke.

"I heard the whole thing are you okay?" The old man asked. I felt myself go red. Someone heard all that...? Oh god.

"I-I'm fine." I blurted out. I was sure my condition right now wasn't fine.

"You're lying kid. Wanna come inside? It'll distract ya." The old man said.

"Sure..." Then I thought for second. This was shifty. One I was in my underpants crying at about maybe 3 am at night. There's an old man who wants me to come inside of his house and pour my heart out. That's shifty. I was vulnerable right now, but I wasn't dumb.

"No...I'm good." I said quickly walking back into my house and closing the door. As soon as I did I just broke down. I curled up into a ball and basically cried for 2 hours. I couldn't believe this. We seriously broke up. What am I even supposed to do now? I stayed up most of the night crying. I felt horrible when I woke up. I bet Axl didn't even care. I bet he's at home playing his SNES. I bet that motherfucker is playing Super Metroid. With that stupid smirk of his, and that outrageous hair, bet he's wearing those freaking polka dot full body pajamas that I find strangely attractive for no reason. Fuck him.

God I want him back. I need his ridiculousness in my life. It's only been twelve hours since the whole fight/break up thing. I felt ridiculous. The last thing I thought we'd break up over is sex and it was all me. Sure it was an issue...but I didn't have to get mad about it...I need to talk to someone. I need to get him back but I don't know how...how is this gonna go down...I need to talk to a woman. They always give relationship advice...but I also need help with you know...that bed stuff. I don't know any girls that would help with out trolling and instigating horribly. The last thing I need right now is to be trolled. I'd probably break down and cry.

What's worse is that everytime I tried to listen to music it was pure torture. So many break up songs...since when did I listen to all these? Like what the hell man? Why was every song I listen to trying to tell me how bad I fucked up. It's not like this is some music video and I can't just go and apologise and just be like, Yeah sorry. I mean sure I need to but I need to step my game up. I needed a mentor. Someone who was experienced. As soon as the word experienced came to mine one person came to my mind. X.

X had been with Zero for like years on years. He probably knew everything and it's mom. He could help. Plus he knew Axl like the back of his hand they were besties since forever. This could go good. I picked up my phone and called X. He picked up pretty quick. It was the afternoon X probably wasn't doing anything.

"X are you busy at all?" I asked into the phone.

"No I was at home ironing laundry, what's up Rock you sound like you've got your soul sucked out." X said with sympathy.

"Can I come over?" I asked over the phone and looked at the clock.

"Of course, we can make cake and watch that movie I keep telling you about." X said.

"I was sorta hoping for some advice." I said.

"Ooooooo~! Guuuuuuuuuuurrrrl you need advice." X said. I eyed the phone suspiciously.

"I know, it's weird." I said sighing to myself.

"What do you need it on anyways...?" X asked regaining his seriousness.

"Well Axl and I broke up..." I started then X cut me off.

"Oh shit...you really do need to come over. Hurry over here we'll talk more here." X said abruptly hanging up the phone as if he was on a mission.

I sighed to myself. But hey, I was pretty sure X would help me. I drove over there and got out the car and knocked on the door. X and Zero had a house. It was little and blue with red shutters. Something tells me that they had this house customized. When the door got answered X opened the door and gave me one of those jump hugs he gives. I think it was filled with sympathy this time. X spoke.

"I can't believe it. What happened to you guys?" X said once we were inside and sitting down on the couch. I sighed. I would have to tell the whole story. I recollected my memories. It sorta hurt trying to play it all back. Technically this was my first breakup. But not my first rejection. I started talking.

"Well in short Axl's bored with me in bed and I made a big deal about it because he didn't say anything about it and he pulled out Pokemon instead. So I made him admit it and then we started arguing and ended up breaking up and I've been a total wreck ever since that happened 13 hours ago and 55 minutes, I need his ridiculousness in my life, I'm lost without him. I need to step my game up so I can get him back. Because I..." I was rambling at that point. X cut me off and put his hand on my shoulder.

"Don't worry Rock, I'll teach you everything I know." X said with a sure face. I observed this and immediately got intimidated.

"I, what exactly are you to show me?" I asked nervously.

"All of my techniques." X said simply with a smile. I was intimidated.

"W-Wait...you don't mean...?" I started. Then X shushed me.

"Axl will swallow his words and alot more than that after I'm done with you." X said with another smile.

"I-I'm scared." I admitted.

"Embrace it. Now let me grab my stuff." X said with a clap and walked into the next room. I was paranoid officially. When he came back he had a big box of unmentionable things I had only ever heard about on the internet. X was too prepared.

"Alright, I'm gonna start by telling you my 5 rules to being a hot twink." X said.

"O-Okay..shoot." I said with fake enthusiasm. Did he really just use the term "hot twink?" I need new friends. Like now.

"First off, never ever just sit back and let stuff happen. I'm going to assume that's what you did huh?" X asked. I nodded. He hit the nail on the head.

"Yeaaaaaaaah." I said looking down.

"You need to be a lot more interactive. I'm talking about feeling up Axl back, and using that tongue of yours on Axl's sweet spots." X said.

"Axl's sweet spots?" I said, I knew I was blushing. X laughed.

"Yeah, he's really sensitive on his neck like everyone else, and for some reason on nipples. I don't know the rest." X said as if he was trying to remember.

"Er how did you know that?" I asked curiously.

"Well you know, College." X shrugged. I was confused but didn't really want to pry. I have to wonder what college was like for them but when I find out I don't think I'd want to know after I knew.

"So what are the rest of the rules?" I asked.

"Well you can read the list because it's gets really provocative." X said slightly embarrassed. As I read the list I felt my face started to heat up.

"D-Deep throat?" I said out loud. X nodded.

"I don't think I need to explain that one." X said.

"Y-Yeah..." I said looking down.

"You're overwhelmed by the list huh?" X said.

"Yeah it's a bit scary." I admitted. X put his hand on my shoulder. I looked over at him. He made a completely serious face.

"Real talk, Rock listen. In these next two hours I will transform you into a total dick master. Women will lose faith in themselves opon hearing what you do, and Axl will never, ever be unsatisfied again. Isn't that what you want?" X said in a serious tone. I didn't know how to answer that so I just nodded.

"To do this you need to let down your walls. It's gonna get a lot awkward from this point on. But remember, it's me. I won't judge you and I know it's hard." X said with a sure of himself grin. My face was completely red at that point. All I could do was nod.

"So Rock, I'm going to assume you're a really good kisser right?" X said. I shrugged.

"I think I'm alright." I said thinking back to random times. X nodded as if he had a check list.

"Okay, so how about dirty talking?" X asked. Let me just admit this to myself. I have never ever ever ever ever ever ever. EVER. Needed to do that in my life. It was only something I'd ever heard of.

"Nope never." I said quickly. X titled his head as if he didn't believe it.

"Are you serious?" X said.

"100%, I've only ever seen the stuff on hentai." I said admitting the truth. X looked dumbfounded.

"So...you've never like literally asked for sex?" X said as if he was processing it.

"Never. It just sorta happens." I said with a shrug.

"What do you mean it just sorta happens?!" X said.

"Well I'd be watching something or playing something or even reading something and suddenly it just starts happening." I said. X looked disturbed. Was that wrong or something?

"S-So...you just kinda...Rock, you need help." X said facepalming.

"I see that now..." I replied putting my head down.

"Alright we'll start with foreplay. Rock approach me in a manner you see fit." X said sitting back. I hesitated for a moment but then walked over to X and then sat on his lap. I leaned in close and spoke while putting my hand on his chest.

"X, I want..." I said looking straight into X's eyes with my best lustful glance but as soon as our eyes connected we both busted out laughing.

"Rock I can't take you seriously." X said between chuckles. I scowled.

"I can't take me seriously either." I said with a sigh.

"Well starting sex doesn't always mean talking. Just do what feels natural I guess." X said. So sighing I got back into my serious trying to learn something mood, I processed what he said. What felt natural. I mean naturally if I want to have sex with someone I want their clothes off, then earlier X said something about sweet spots. Maybe if I combine both pieces of info...

So I started with unbuttoning X's top slowly, and then going for his neck, X made like a small gasp noise when the kisses started trailing down his neck. It was cute. I was going to pull away to get X's opinion, When suddenly the front door opened it was Zero. He started talking as soon as he opened the door.

"God X, today was just..." His voice trailed off as he saw us on the couch. X and I were frozen. Zero just stopped in his tracks as if he was observing the situation. I heard X about to say something when Zero said something.

"Why is this?" He suddenly asked. Zero's sentence didn't even make sense.

"Well, I know this looks bad but I was showing Rock my techniques." X said. Zero tilted his head a little bit. Then he sighed.

"Well...okay...but..., you know what? I'm just gonna pretend I didn't see anything." Zero said creeping up the stairs with squinty eyes as if he was disturbed.

"Er..." I felt awkward. X laughed.

"It's fine he's just a little freaked out." X said.

"Are you sure because..." I started X cut me off.

"You pass this lets continue." X said. I got off his lap and sat on the couch next to him.

"So what's next?" I asked curiously.

"Special positions." X said with a cheerful smile.

X and I got on the floor and once again X assumed the dominate and I was submissive. We went into nine different poses that I had never seen before in my life. X was directing me through it. With verbal instructions.

"Alright now wrap your leg around me like this and...there we go." X said. I observed how I was positioned and I didn't even know this was physically possible. Like what? Who even came up with this? This was some freaky shit. It was pretty comfortable though. X and Zero had some nice carpet. But through out all the wierd positions there was one thing on my mind. I hope Zero doesn't come down stairs.

As if on cue Zero came down stairs. Right when X was on top of me, with my legs wrapped around him. Why does god and mother nature hate me. Zero's mouth was open he made some type of hurt noise. X and I looked over.

"Okay now I have to ask...why just why?" He asked. It was like Zero lost his composure. I saw X snicker.

"What Zero are you jealous or something?" X said with smirk as we got out of the position. I felt my face go red.

"N-No, it's just...weird shit is happening inside my house and it's only fair that I know why...and it's sorta nerve wrecking seeing you and Rock in all these poses, every time I walk down the stairs." Zero said as if he let out all of his concern. X laughed.

"Zero you're so cute when you're all flustered and confused. But no it's just Rock and Axl broke up and..." X started then Zero cut him off.

"What!? you and Axl broke up?! why? How..." Zero spluttered out looking in my direction. I sighed.

"Love making problems." I said. Zero tilted his head.

"I'm gonna go talk to him." Zero said getting up off of the couch then X grabbed his arm and pulled him back down and shook his head.

"Actually its my fault." I spoke up.

"Rock done fucked up." Zero said with a nod. I sighed.

"Well in short...Rock sucks, Axl was putting up with it silently, Rock got upset about it. An argument started and some mean things were said now they're broken up." X said,

"And now we're here." Zero said. X nodded.

"I feel really bad and I can't go on without him." I said.

"It's only been like ...15 hours right?" Zero said.

"Ha yep." X said with a giggle.

"So that's why you're showing him your so called techniques, X?" Zero asked.

"Yep." X said.

"So Rock can go and get his man back?" Zero said with a little smile.

"Yep." X said nodding again.

"Okay but, Rock two things." Zero said. I nodded.

"You get Axl a box of Zingers and you're in there, He's a slut for Zingers and two, kiss Axl on his scar mark, he likes that on the low." Zero said with a thumbs up.

"Zero, how do you know that?" X asked.

"Because Axl is a slut who does horrible horrible things for Zingers." Zero said with a smile and he went up the stairs.

"Rock if you can't get him back, bribe that mother fucker with Zingers." X said looking me in the eye.

"WAIT!, I got a better idea, we'll just combine Sex and Zingers." Zero said suddenly from up the stairs.

So to save the disgusting details, sex and zingers were happening and...I had to take like 2 showers.

God help me.

But I got my man back.

So...erm yeah.

The end.

I can't take this chapter seriously I was snickering throughout the whole thing. Like why. Zingers are amazing...*explodes*