A/N:
Once again thank you for your support. The response to this story has been amazing so far, and it makes me want to get the chapters out as fast as I can! I am a hair stylist and my schedule can be crazy sometimes, but I will try to stay as regular as I can. As always thank you for your encouraging reviews. The more I receive the more I want to write! Please keep them coming! Another huge thank you to my beta, Bec, this would be much harder without you! :)

Disclaimer: I do not own them in any way, shape or form, but I love them just the same.

She hears that insistent pounding, feels it as it grips her, wonders where it's coming from until she realizes it's her own heart. Three things need to happen now: she needs to know that Castle is okay, she needs to end things with Josh, and she needs to make things right with the man she loves. In the future when she looks back on this day, it will seem like it took hours, maybe even days to play out, yet in reality, it will come down to minutes, minutes to change three lives forever.

(Castle's Fate)

Josh waits for the family to gather around before he tells them Castle's fate. Kate listens but only one word currently registers in her mind. Alive. Castle is alive. She forces herself to focus on the medical diagnoses as Martha and Alexis both sigh with relief. Josh tells them that they lost him again, in the operating room, his heart had once again stopped beating and he had almost left them, almost left her. The bullet had pierced the tip of his atrium, and if it had been any lower he would be gone. He'll have a scar, and it will forever be a part of him. He's still here, but he remains unconscious and that will remain the biggest concern for now. One minute was all it took for Kate to hear all that she needed to: he is alive.

(Josh's ending)

Kate nods as a nurse comes to take Martha and Alexis to see Castle; it's only right that they go first and she has something she needs to do anyway. She waits until they leave and then ushers Josh into the room, shutting the door behind him. She knows this isn't really fair to him and she should have ended it long ago, but she made her choice and now she has to face the consequences. She can see on his face that he knows what is about to happen, yet he lets her continue anyway.

"Josh, there is no way to make this any easier, so I am just going to be completely honest. I appreciate everything you did for Castle today, you saved his life and I can never thank you enough for that. But, the truth is, I am in love with him and I have been for some time. I should have been honest with you sooner and I know that this is in no way fair to you but I have to do what's right now. I was scared of these feelings for so long that I have been ignoring them but I can't do that anymore, I don't want to live my life wondering, what if? I have to go after what I want, and, what I want, is Castle. I am sorry for continuing this as long as I have and I need you to know that you are a good man, but this is it for us."

She is surprised that he hasn't reacted at all yet, so she waits him out. He stares blankly at her for a few moments and then she sees the rage begin to form.

"Kate, are you seriously in love with writer boy or is this some obligation you feel you have to him because he saved your life? I get that what he did is a big deal, Kate, but it doesn't mean he is the only one that would do it for you. You really think he is that much better for you then I am? That he will put up with you like I have? He will get tired of being held at arm's length waiting for you to let him get close, Kate. So I guess I was nothing more to you than a good release when you needed it, someone to help you out and then get kicked to the curb? I thought you were better than this, Kate."

He turns to storm out of the room, but she stops him. She's more upset than she should be at those last few things he said to her, after all he has a right to be mad but she feels the need to defend herself somewhat. "Josh, stop you know that is not true, you were more than just sex but we aren't meant for each other. I don't let people get close to me because it's just easier this way, but he doesn't give up, Josh. He isn't better for me because I think he is better than you, he is better for me because he makes me better. I don't want to fight anymore, please, just let it go."

He leaves her standing there with her emotions once again threatening to take over. She knows some of what he said was true but she wasn't expecting him to be that angry. She is sorry that she hurt him but she won't apologize for who she loves, she'll never be sorry about who her heart has chosen. She thinks to herself, at least that is out of the way, for now anyway.

(Kate's reality)

She waits alone for Martha and Alexis to return, finally standing as they enter the waiting room. There are fresh tears on the young girl's face but they both seem relieved to have finally seen him. She sends them to get coffee as she makes her way to Castle's room. Opening the door, she is met with the sounds of the machines he is hooked up to and she fights back the tears that are threatening to fall. She knows if she lets them start now that the flood will come pouring through and she doesn't want that yet. She slowly makes her way to his bed and takes his hand in her own. Despite all he has been through today, he still looks ruggedly handsome and she can't help but smile. She can see the white bandage peeking from the top of his gown and the reality of what he has done hits her full force.

This man risked his life for her, with no hesitation at all, and placed himself in the aim of the bullet that should have hit her. It took mere seconds for him to push her out of the way and place himself into its path and therefore change his life forever. He obviously had no second thoughts then, and she can only hope that he won't have them when he wakes up. All that matters to her right now is that they are both here and as if conceding with Castle's decision it seems fate has given them another chance.

She's not sure how long she stands there before the toll of this day finally catches up with her. She reluctantly releases his hand to pull a chair over and then quickly reestablishes that connection with him as she sits. Martha and Alexis return with her coffee and after some mild persuasion she convinces them to go get some rest, with a promise that she will call them if he wakes. They bid her goodnight with a promise to return first thing in the morning unless they hear from her.

She talks to him now, knows he probably can't hear her, but it's more for her anyway. She tells him about the day, whispers her thanks to him over and over, promises him that she is in this now and that she isn't going anywhere. It eases her guilt a little, slows the rapid thumping her heart has been doing since he pushed her out of the way. He is still here, death didn't take him, and she takes it as a sign, closes her eyes and whispers another quiet thank you. She rests her head on the bed, traces each of his fingers with her own and eventually the pull of sleep lulls her under.

She is startled awake by the ringing of her phone, jerking upright to fish it out of her pocket. She answers as she stands, and takes another look at Castle before she slips into the hall.

"Beckett, it's Ryan. Just wanted to check in with you. How is he?"

'He's alive, Ryan. Still hasn't regained consciousness but he's alive, that's all that matters right now."

"Glad to hear, but uh listen, Beckett, I have some bad news."

She takes in a sudden breath, she's not sure she can handle anything else involving the word bad today.

"What is it?"

"We found the gun the sniper used, it was wiped clean, CSU found no prints at all. We have no leads for the time being."

She was afraid of that. This isn't going to be easy to solve, then again when is her life ever easy?

"Okay thanks for updating me, Ryan, I know you and Espo are doing all you can. I really appreciate everything and I know Castle would too."

"Were not giving up, Beckett. The guy that shot Castle is still out there, and the shot was meant for you, so until we figure this out, neither of you are safe. We're going to have a protective detail put on you both for now. I'll call if anything else pops."

"I know. Thank you again. I'll be there as soon as I can to help. I'll talk to you soon."

Sighing, she places her phone back in her pocket. She feels the weight of this day now more than ever, knows she is only still functioning because of the coffee in her system. Her head is beginning to pound and she knows sleep is what she needs. She won't sleep long, wants to be sure she's there for him when he wakes, wants him to know she's in this just as much as he is. Making her way back across the room to his bed, she has to stop suddenly. A soft gasp leaves her mouth as she is met with the cloudy, still slightly out of it, stare of his beautiful blue eyes.