I think this chapter is depressing as hell because I kind of wanted to explain how Katniss finds out that she loves Peeta, I also wanted to be true to the book and mentioned the pearl and how Katniss takes care of it. I really hope you enjoy it.
PS. Sorry for the lack of Finnick.
I'm in District twelve, in my house at the Victors' Village, I'm sitting next to the hearth with Prim, we're joking and laughing while mom's in the kitchen cooking dinner. I feel happy and complete. Someone knocks on the door. It's Peeta.
"I've got you some cookies" He says with a wide smile, and kisses me in the lips.
"Thank you" I whisper against his lips.
I tell him to enter and he sits with Prim and me next to the fire.
"Peeta! Guess what! Katniss is taking me to the woods!" She says excited.
"Really? That's awesome!" He replies smiling
"Yeah" She says grinning "You should come with us!"
"I'll go if Katniss wants me to." He says looking at me.
I smile and stare at him. I know nobody's perfect, but he's close; He's sweet, kind, caring, self-sacrificing… I find it hard not to like him.
"I'll go help mom with the food. Peeta, do you want to stay for dinner?" Prim asks.
"Sure, thanks, Prim." He replies smiling.
Prim disappears into the kitchen. Peeta looks at me and smiles widely.
"So you're taking us to the woods…" He says as he sits closer to me.
"Yeah, I hope that none of you gets lost." I say laughing.
"We won't." He says.
He puts behind my ear a wisp of hair that got out of my braid and smiles at me.
"I love you, Katniss." He whispers as he presses his forehead against mine and looks me in the eyes. His eyes are deep blue and beautiful. He kisses me soft and gently; I adore how his warm lips feel against mine, I run my hands through his blonde, soft hair.
"I love you, Peeta" I whisper against his lips. I feel him smiling while he kisses me.
Someone bangs the door like if they wanted to bring it down. I growl, I don't want to leave his side for a second… They bang again.
"I'll be right back" I mutter annoyed. I open the door and a group of peace-keepers break into my house. "Wh-What's going on?!" I yell scared.
"President Snow's orders." A man says.
I run to Peeta, but they're holding him.
"What is going on?!" He shouts scared.
I try to stop them, in vain; they push me away so hard I fall.
"Stop!" I yell "You just can't take him away!"
They ignore me and take Peeta out of my house; they throw him into the ground and kick him.
"STOP!" I yell again. I punch a peace-keeper in the face, he hits me back right in the face and sends me to the ground; I hit my head against the pavement and my vision turns blurry and dark. I try to stand up, but I have no control on my body.
"Katniss!" Peeta screams.
I stand up weakly and dizzy, I can't walk straight; I try to get to Peeta, and when I'm just a few meters away from him I hear a shot.
"NO!" I scream panicked "No, no, no!" I see Peeta's body fall and run to him, I rest his head in my lap. The peace-keepers start leaving, but I don't care, Peeta is all that matters right now.
"Katniss" he weakly whispers.
"Hush… Everything will be okay, I'm here." I say with tears in my eyes I softly caress his cheek.
"I love you, Katniss… More than anything" he mutters.
"I love you too, Peeta" I say. He looks at the sky and smiles, he breathes heavily.
"Look up" he says smiling "It's a beautiful sunset…"
I just can't look away, but I do. I lean at him and kiss him softly.
"I'll always love you…" He whispers. Every second that goes by it gets harder for him to breathe.
"I love you… I'll always do" I say crying. He wipes my tears away and smiles.
"I'll always be with you." He says weakly.
"I love you." I say as I look him in the eyes; He smiles at me and I press my forehead against his. We close our eyes and stay in silence. His breathing starts becoming heavier until it stops. I open my eyes and look at him.
"No…" The tears burn in my eyes, I can't see clearly. "NO!" I scream. "Peeta, look at me!"
I wake up yelling Peeta's name; tears are streaming down my face.
"Katniss…" I don't know whose voice it is, so I look around, it's Gale, he's sitting at the edge of my bed. I growl and angrily wipe my tears.
"How long have you been here?" I ask him.
"Long enough." He mutters.
"Did you see that?" I ask as I sit.
"Yes…" He looks worried and kind of sad.
I feel mad at him for watching how I reacted to my nightmare, but I also feel vulnerable, because he's noticed how Peeta's death affected me, I don't know why, but I'm terrified of people knowing how bad I feel. We stay in silence for a long while.
"I know it's stupid to ask this, but… Are you okay?" He asks breaking the silence.
"I'll cope with it…" I mutter.
He sighs frustrated. Maybe I'm making his patience run out.
"Katniss, do you know how much it hurts me to see you this way?" He says looking me in the eyes; he looks sad and tired. He sits next to me and runs his hand through my cheek. I rest my head in his hand. "I know you're sad, but…" His voice fades away and he looks away.
"But what?" I ask confused.
"Never mind..." he says and fakes a smile. "Let's go and eat breakfast, I'm hungry."
"I'm not…" I start to say, but Gale interrupts me slamming his lips against mine, they're warm and soft. "What was that?" I ask when he moves away.
"Come on, let's grab something to eat." He says evading my question.
We walk to the dining hall and eat in silence. When we're done with our breakfast, he tells me he has work to do, then, I go back to my room. When I get there, Prim's playing with Buttercup. She looks up and smiles at me, I fake the best smile I can; I can't afford myself to let her notice how wrecked I am, she doesn't need another worry. I sit in my bed and watch how she pets Buttercup, I think I'll never like that dumb cat.
"How are you?" She asks as she sits next to me.
"A little better" I lie and try to smile. "I just haven't accepted the fact that he's gone." I mutter.
"Do you miss him too much?"
I take a deep breath and nod; Why does everyone ask me this question? Of course I miss him. I'm not sure if I loved him, but he was important for me, I needed and still need him around. I feel how the tears struggle to come out; I hold them back, because of Prim. She hugs me and we stay quiet for a long time.
"Do you mind if I leave?" She still looks worried, I smile to calm her down "I told mom I'd help her at the nursery" She excuses "But I can stay here if you want me to."
"It's okay" I reply and smile weakly. "I'll be fine; maybe I'll go to talk with Finnick or for a walk."
"Okay." She hugs me before running out of the room.
I search between my stuff the pearl Peeta gave me at the beach. I stare at it. When he gave it to me he said that he'd always protect me. Guilt stabs me right in the guts, because I wasn't in time to save him. This pearl is the only thing I have left of him, and all the memories. I keep it in the pocket of my jacket. I'll protect it the way I should have protected Peeta.
God, I miss him, his strong arms holding me tight, the kisses, the way he made me feel… I need him, but what's more important… I love him, but I figured it out too late.
I lie down in my bed and stare at the ceiling. I don't want to be alone; I don't want to be locked up in here forever… I need to get out before I get drowned in the wave of insanity that is threatening to finish me.
I stand up and walk to Finnick's room. I knock.
"Who's there?" He asks.
"It's me." God, I feel so stupid, of course he will not recognize my voice. "Katniss."
"Come in!" He screams from the other side of the door.
I enter and he's lying down in his bed shirtless and with his arms crossed behind his head.
"To what do I owe the honor of your presence?" He asks teasingly and grins at me.
"I wanted to talk." I stand firmly. I do not want to tell him that I desperately needed someone to talk to and that he was the first person that came into my mind.
"Okay, so what do you want to talk about?" He's still grinning.
"Anything." I reply "How are you?"
"I'm fine. I'm the one who should be asking you." He gets out of the bed and walk towards me. He looks me in the eyes. "Have you been crying?" I ignore his question. He frowns and hugs me. "Do you want to go for a walk?" He asks smiling.
"Yeah, that would be great." I reply.
We sit in the same log as the day before. And talk about Peeta and Annie, when I ask him how their relationship is going his smile becomes a grimace of pain.
"What's wrong?" I ask.
"We're not together anymore." He mutters bitterly.