Author's Note: I don't own anything having to do with the Walking Dead only Becca belongs to me.

This one is just a tad different in that the whole chapter will be before the ZA but there will still be a flashback from when they were kids. Hope it's not too confusing. May is turning out to be a very busy month so I will try and update again as soon as possible!

Chapter 6

It was hard to say what exactly had me so elated these past few weeks. It could have been the fact that I no longer had Rich's engagement ring on my finger weighing me down. Part of me thought it was because I had been sharing a bed with Merle every night only to wake up in the morning and realize it wasn't all a dream. He'd be on his back, one arm hanging off the side of the bed, and his mouth slightly open as soft snores escaped. The first few nights I stayed up and watched as he slept. There was something about being in his own bed in his own room that put him at ease. It was the one place that the walls he built years ago came down and I could see the person that had wormed his way into my heart.

The air in the room was heavy, the box fan in the window doing little to cool it off, and sleep was calling to me. The Georgia sun had been beating down on the trailer all day and now that the moon was high in the sky we finally got some relief. I was curled on my side, my back pressed against the wall, with a good few inches between Merle and I. Tonight was different, he was different, and as he lay on his back staring up at the ceiling his thoughts were blanketing the room. I had learned over the years to not push him to talk, he'd say what was on his mind if he really wanted me to know, otherwise my pestering would only make him bottle it up more until he exploded.

I was in limbo, the place of consciousness where you're not really awake but you're not really sleeping either. I felt him shift in the bed but didn't bother to see what he was doing because sleep was so close. He tucked a piece of hair behind my ear and I was just ready to fall over the edge into a deep slumber when I heard him whisper. "What're you doin' here, sugar?" His thumb slid over the scars on my wrist. "I'm not the devil but I can't be your hero."

By the time I opened my eyes and blinked a few times to adjust to the darkness he was on his back with an arm under his pillow. If Mr. Dixon wasn't already dead I would have killed him for making his boys think so little of themselves. They were two lost souls looking searching for their place in this sadistic world and I wanted to be the one to show them their worth. Despite the sweltering heat I laid my head on his chest and draped my arm around his middle. He didn't move or complain and as his breathing evened out his soft snores were like a lullaby pulling me back to sleep.

The next morning when I woke he was already gone leaving me in the trailer by myself. I pulled on a pair of shorts and threw on one of his wife beaters. Weekends were the worst in this suffocating town. There were the people that would sit on their wooden porches snickering at anyone who passed by, the kids would be running around causing mischief, and others would let the heat be their excuse to walk around with the bare minimum of clothes. It was when the weekends rolled around that I remembered why I ever wanted to leave.

The first time I ever met Merle we were going to runaway together but as fate would have it we never made it.

*Flashback*

Momma and daddy were fighting again so instead of sitting and listening to it I was out exploring the woods behind our trailer. Leaves crunched beneath my feet as I used the small saplings to pull myself along the unmarked trail. There was a calm about being out in the woods with no arguing parents only the soft songs of nature. I was just about to the creek when a boy a few years older than me stalked past and scared me causing me to scream.

"Don't be yellin', you idiot," he snarled at me.

I crossed my arms and stuck my hip out to the side like I had seen momma do when she was mad. "Don't be scaring me then! Whatcha doing with that bag? Are you going camping?"

"I ain't tellin' you."

He started walking through the woods again but this time I followed. "What's your name?" He didn't even slow his pace and I studied the back of his head. "Well, I'm Becca. Now it's your turn. What's your name?" Still nothing but the rustling leaves. "Where are you going?"

He growled as he turned around and I had to grab a nearby tree to keep myself from falling over. "What the hell you followin' me for? Go on back home, dimples, ain't got time to baby sit."

My head titled to the side in confusion. "You mean you're really leaving?" He mumbled something I wasn't able to hear and started walking away again. "I didn't know we could leave. Can I go with you?"

"No."

"Wait," I caught up to him quick enough and it finally occurred to me where I had seen him before. "Don't you have a brother?"

My question stopped him dead in his tracks as he whipped his head in my direction. "What's it to you?"

I shrugged, "Think he has lunch before me at school. Danny? David?"

"Daryl," he snapped and I swear he was showing off his teeth like an angered dog.

"You know, you don't have to be so mean. It was just a question. You'd make more friends if you weren't trying to scare everyone away."

He readjusted the bag over his shoulder, "I don't have any friends."

"I'll be your friend," I stuck my right hand out like daddy taught me but he just stared at it. "You're supposed to shake it."

His eyes flickered from my hand to my face a few times before he sighed. "Merle."

I let my arm fall back down to my side and let him lead the way.

*Present*

It was all just another pipe dream though once you were in this town you were lucky if you ever got out. My mother had come looking for me and when she found me with Merle she ushered him right back home too. We were both looking for an escape that day but instead we found each other. From that moment on I never stopped letting Merle lead the way and I was certainly not supposed to fall in love with him.

The small radio on the table was playing music I'd hear shit about if Merle was home but in that moment I didn't care. He'd come back later from whatever he was doing, I'd feed him a hearty dinner, and give him me for dessert. It was an easy routine we had quickly fallen into and one I wasn't looking to change anytime soon. The front door slammed and I dropped the pan I had been scrubbing into the sink.

"I hate when you guys do that!" I called over my shoulder as I turned the water on and ran it over the pan to wash away the soap. After turning the faucet off I stood there for a second and listened to see who had come home. Merle walked with determination in every step he took while Daryl was more careful and around the house he'd shuffle quietly from room to room so quietly that you'd never know he was even there. "Daryl?"

He came into the kitchen with the Dixon scowl on his face. "Merle needs to get his shit together."

"What are you talking about?" I asked, genuinely confused because though he was quite colorful Merle had been pretty good lately.

"Didn't hear? He got picked up 'bout an hour ago." My stomach dropped and I held onto the counter to keep myself standing. This didn't make any sense. Merle knew to be extra careful because of past offences. Daryl kept talking but I only heard parts of it while I was trying to wrap my mind around it. "…said had too much of his stash on him."

It all started to fall into place and I felt the bile rising up in my throat. I stormed passed Daryl and snatched my car keys off the table. Gravel shot back from the back tires as I peeled out and down through the streets until I came to a screeching halt in front of his trailer. My fist pounded on the front door until Rich finally opened it.

A glint of a smile was in his eyes as he greeted me only pissing me off more and confirming everything I dreaded. "What can I do for you, Becca?"

"You fucking asshole," I pushed him back into the trailer and slammed the door behind me.

He chuckled and held his hands up in mock surrender. "If you wanted to fool around all you had to do was say so I still have the handcuffs in my drawer."

"Why, huh? Why did you do this? Why couldn't you just leave well enough alone?! He never did anything to you!"

He pulled the black velvet box from his pants pocket and opened it so I could see the engagement ring I left behind. "I told you there would never be anyone who loved you as much as I did, didn't I?"

"So you had him arrested?!" Merle may have his demons but there was no way he'd ever carry enough on him that would lead to his arrest. This was all an evil plan from an even more vicious man.

"You're mine, Becca, and I will do whatever I have to for you to see that." I felt as if the walls were closing in on me and it got harder to draw air into my lungs as he stepped closer. He took my left hand in his and slid the ring back on my finger. "This is where you belong. This is where you'll be loved." He kissed my cheek and patted my head like I was just some pet to him. "Now remember, firecracker, you take that ring off and all it will take is one phone call and Merle Dixon will just be another convict they are mopping off the prison's floor. So, what do you say? Will you marry me, Rebecca Ann?"

There wasn't anything I wouldn't do for Merle Dixon and if that meant selling my soul to the devil himself then I'd burn in hell. This wasn't the life I wanted but it was as close to surviving as I would get.

"Yes."