"I don't know, Em. Do you want that? I mean this isn't just my decision anymore. I want to include you on this." Alison whispered back, refusing to make any decisions without knowing what Emily wanted. If this baby was to come into the world, the blonde wanted to be sure that Emily wanted him or her as well. She wouldn't put the burden of motherhood on the brunette for her own selfishness. Besides, Alison was still confused and frightened. "I had to think quickly to survive, Emmy. I guess it's just sort of in my instinct but I promise, you'll be included in any future plans I have. Speaking of the future...will you do me the honor of spending now and the rest my life with me?" She asked sweetly, taking Emily's ring and holding it up to her, wanting to place it back in its rightful place. She knew she was moving fast but it felt right to make everything official once again.
Emily's heart began to race, she felt happy yet somewhat uncomfortable over the fact that Alison had re-proposed that quickly. Emily gently shook her head and pulled away from Alison by just a little bit. "No.." She whispered, knowing it would kill Alison to hear that simple word after the little talk they were having. "I won't marry you, not for a bit. I'm sorry." She frowned, placing the ring back in the palm of Alison's hand. Feeling her lips trembling once more, Emily quickly stood up, her back to Alison, a few tears finally deciding to slide down her cheeks. "I think you should make your own choice. You're the one who's going to carry the baby and give birth..." She spoke quietly, her back still to Alison as she tried to regain her composure.
Alison stood up and sighed deeply. She ran her hand through her hair and held Emily's ring tightly in her hand as the tears formed in her eyes. "Emily..." Alison whispered, her voice breaking as she let herself burst into tears, despite hating to look so vulnerable in front of the brunette. She finally walked over and placed the ring in Emily's palm. "Keep it. Whether you ever marry me or not, I don't want to keep looking at this. It's yours and having it here to wake up to every morning is just too painful." Alison admitted to her pain and looked down at her feet. "I...I don't want you to leave. I hate waking up alone." She blurted out even though she knew she sounded kind of ridiculous.
"I will, some day. Just not now. Keep it, to remind you to never give up.. because when the right day will come, Ali.. I'll say yes, and you'll need it to be able to slide it down my finger." Emily spoke in a soft voice, finally turning around to find the blonde bursting in tears. "Hey, don't cry.. it's okay.." Emily tried to comfort her, however it was almost impossible to comfort the blonde when she was as frantic as this. "Shh, it's okay." Emily could obviously tell that Alison's hormones were playing tricks on her, the blonde simply needed to sleep and grab some decent food. "Do you, uhm. Want to go out for food? I could tell my mom I'm spending the night with Spencer, I'm sure Spence would vouch for me."
"You'll say yes? Are you sure about that?" Alison couldn't help but ask through her sobbing. She'd never been so afraid of anything in her life. But for Emily to walk away or worse say she loved her but never be with her, it would kill her. Alison couldn't stop crying even though her mind was telling her to. "What's wrong with me?" She mumbled, hating how little control she had over her emotions at the moment. "You'd lie again for me? Em...don't get into more trouble, please..." Alison whispered, her tears still streaming down her face. "But yeah, let's go out. I don't want to stay here, around my dad right now."
"Whether you believe it or not, I'd always lie for you Alison, no matter what the situation." Emily admitted. "Just please.. stop crying. It'll be okay, it'll all add up in the end, okay? I promise you that." The fact that the blonde was crying so much killed Emily inside, she wanted to be able to take all of her pain away, to just see a small smile over the blonde's lips. "We just have a lot of things to work out Alison, a lot of things. And I'm pretty sure right now that your main concern should be how you're going to explain a growing stomach.." Emily added. She didn't want to startle the blonde, however; she wanted to help her get somewhat ready.
"You care so much, Emily. I don't know what I did to deserve you." Alison replied, taking deep breaths to stop herself from crying again. She wiped away her own tears and finally managed to somewhat regain her composure. "I know. But can we figure that out when I'm not going insane?" Alison laughed a bit, trying to lighten the mood just a little. "I feel so out of control." She admitted as she made her way over to her full-length mirror. "Yuck. I look like a zombie or something." She ran her hands through her hair and then turned to Emily. "So where did you want to go eat? It's my treat and please don't argue just this once, okay? You've already done more than I deserve."
"I was thinking of pizza and fries.. there's a good place near Ravenswood, if you don't mind the short drive..?" Emily asked silently, not wanting to go too far in case Alison was too tired or something, she really didn't want to make the blonde uncomfortable or anything like that. The brunette stood behind Alison who made herself comfortable in front of a mirror; her hair gently gliding in her golden blonde locks. "You're fine.." She mumbled, gently brushing her hair. After, she placed a hand on her shoulder, then lowered her body; placing her free hand over Alison's stomach. "We'll be fine."
"Mmm pizza. I just hope I'll be able to eat it." Alison's eyes lit up at the word 'Pizza,' as it was her favorite food after all. "I don't mind at all. In fact leaving Rosewood for a while sounds really good right now." The blonde definitely felt like she could use a getaway even if it was only to get dinner with Emily. She placed her hand over the brunette's on her stomach. "Would you still stick by me if I keep it?" She whispered softly, wanting to be sure that Emily would stay no matter what decision she made. She felt weird to be so insecure but she figured it was probably just her hormones making her emotional.
"I've always stuck by you, what would make me change my mind now?" Emily answered in a quiet and relaxed tone of voice, meaning every word she was saying. She knew that she would stick by Alison no matter what the situation, no matter how hard things got. She kept her hand unmoving over Alison's stomach, knowing she couldn't feel anything just yet, however it intrigued her. She turned to face Alison, her eyes glowing. As odd as everything sounded, this very situation/moment felt right.. it felt like something from a fairytale. "I just want you to be comfortable with whichever decision you choose, and I will stand by you 100%. Sure, it'll take time to sink in, but with time comes growth, and with growth comes knowledge, and it's then you learn about yourself and you learn about the one you're with." Emily planted a soft kiss over Alison's cheek, then lowered her lips to kiss gently over Alison's stomach. She finally got up, feeling her stomach make odd noises. "Now that you mention it, I'm starving too."
"When did you get so smart about life experiences, Emmy?" She asked in teasing voice, rather impressed by the brunette's wisdom. "I guess I'm just so scared to lose you. You're beautiful and amazing and it's so easy for anyone to love you. I never let anyone love me and you still did. I guess I'm just afraid that if you choose to leave I'll truly be alone." Alison opened up, finally admitting to her fears. She knew that Emily could walk away from this, that someone would easily fall for her. But for her, Emily was it. She'd never be able to let anyone else in like she had with the brunette. Alison gave herself one last look in the mirror and shrugged, deciding she wasn't going to look any better at this point. "Well let's go then. I haven't managed to eat much in days and that can't be good for me. You drive?" Alison asked, placing the keys in Emily's palm.
"It's not good for either of you, Ali." Emily whispered quietly, offering her hand for Alison to take. "Sure, I don't mind driving." She handed her a small smile, squeezing the blonde's hand as soon as she took it. "You'll be fine, and I'll make sure to keep reminding you, okay?" Emily faced Alison, placing a hand over her cheek to caress her, wanting her to know that she in fact wasn't alone in this. Sure, the blonde had made mistakes, but so had Emily; and some mistakes are just more... horrible than others, but you live and learn, and they both had to move on, together. After heading downstairs, Emily noticed a note on the table from Mr. DiLaurentis. "Ali?" She narrowed her eyebrows. "Your dad had an emergency at work, said he'd be later." Emily spoke to Alison, making sure she at least knew her dad was gone before the two left as well.
The blonde took Emily's hand and squeezed it tightly. "I'm just so glad you were willing to forgive me. I...thank you for everything." Alison whispered, stopping herself from going into another emotional rant.
Alison shrugged and rolled her eyes. "He's always busy with work. Even when my mom was around, he never had time for us." She sighed softly, letting herself think of her mom for a moment. "I miss her, Em. It's times like this, I need her so much." Alison admitted, realizing that this pregnancy would be slightly easier if her mom was here to help her through it. The blonde grabbed her jacket off the kitchen table chair and slipped it on. She made her way to her car, waiting for Emily to unlock it.
Emily sighed and walked over to Alison's car, her keys against the palm of her hands, she unlocked the doors and sat down in the drivers seat, buckling her seatbelt; then she turned to Alison. "Ali.. I haven't forgiven you yet, but I am giving you another chance, forgiveness comes in time, okay? But I am willing to spend as much time with you as possible until the forgiveness comes.. I care for you, and I love you." Emily placed her hand over Alison's knee, knowing her hormones were driving her crazy, she at least wanted to give her that little bit of human attention and affection that she probably craved so much right now.
Alison shrugged slightly and put her seatbelt on. She didn't really know how to react anymore. Either she had no emotions or too many lately and it was driving her crazy. "I love you too." The blonde wanted to say more but she was too afraid. Everything she said turned into some emotional speech or something lately and she hated it. She was sick of crying, sick of feeling and so she remained quite. "Let's just get dinner. I'm starving and this baby is making me feel really weird." Alison replied before closing her eyes and leaning back against the passenger seat. "Oh and spending time with me? How are your parents going to feel since you're back home now?" Alison directed the attention to Emily's issue, tired of the attention being on her mistake.
"It's okay to cry it out.." Emily whispered to the blonde who sat beside her. She noticed how much Alison's lips were trembling, and she simply wanted to help her get it out. "Let me deal with my parents.." She spoke calmly, then added. "Plus, since my school is paid for next year, I can maybe find myself a loft around Rosewood, I have enough money to pay rent alone for a year..." The brunette placed a hand over Alison's cheek, caressing it gently and trying to comfort her the best she could. "You're not alone, I promise. You see me, sitting right beside you right now? If you want me there when the baby is due, I'll be right beside you." And Emily meant every word that she said. She then started the car and headed out of the driveway. "Oh, can I take you somewhere after we eat?" She asked calmly.
Alison shook her head. "I know but I'm so sick of crying. It's all I've been doing for a whole week, Em. My dad almost tried to convince me to go to therapy or worse, a clinic. I know it's not your fault so don't feel guilty. It's just, I've been such a wreck lately and it's bad for the baby but this baby is making me so crazy." The blonde sighed and shook her head yet again. "I love you and I love that you would go to the ends of the earth for me but you can't just live on your own and spend all your money. That's too much. I saw the look on your face when you thought you'd have to cut your parents off for good. I'm not letting you do that. You love them and they love you." Alison firmly stated. She wouldn't allow Emily to lose her family no matter how much harder it made things for her. "And I would really like it if you were the one holding my hand in the delivery room. I can't think of anyone else I'd want beside me." She smiled softly, her first smile in a week. "Yeah, I'll go anywhere with you, Em."
Emily smiled as soon as she heard the blonde speak. Her heart began to beat just that little bit faster when she heard Alison speak; butterflies flowed throughout her gut and adrenaline began to race through her entire body. "I'll do what I want to make myself, to make you, and to make my parents happy. I'll still love them just as much as if I lived with them, and then again, I could probably get used to living alone since that's what I'll be doing when I go to Stanford." Emily sighed. She wanted nothing more than to bring Alison and the child with her, though she knew it would make it harder on her studies; it was something she'd have to discuss with the blonde when the time was right. All that Emily did was drive to the Pizza Parlor, one of the best around. As soon as she exited Rosewood, she slid her window open, squeezing Alison's knee with her free hand.
Alison felt just a tiny bit better when she saw that her words had brought a smile to Emily's face. She listened to all the brunette had to say and nodded. "As long as you're happy. That's all that matters." The blonde truly had lost focus on her own happiness, all her attention on how to make Emily happy. Besides if the brunette got all she wanted and deserved, then Alison was happy too. She smiled a bit brighter and turned her head to look directly at Emily. "You're going to be amazing at Stanford. I can't wait to be in that audience cheering for you at your swim meets." Alison could practically picture the brunette swimming at Stanford and taking home the gold medal.
"Yeah, you think I'll get out of the pool and every time I'll have a gold medal around my neck? I hope you're right Ali." Emily couldn't help but chuckle a little bit, a bright smile on her face. Upon arriving at the Pizza Parlor, she took the keys from the ignition and placed a hand over the blonde's shoulder. "Hungry?" She added, unlocking the doors so the girls could get out. Emily walked over to Alison's door and opened it for her, closing it afterwards and locking the car. She made her way to the front entrance and then found a booth for the two of them, sitting in front of Alison once she sat down. "Do you wanna share one or do you want your own?" She asked politely, knowing the two always had different pizza preferences.
"You're the best in Rosewood, Em. Who's to say you won't be the best at Stanford too. Besides, aren't I always right, Em?" Alison winked playfully, a bit of her normal self coming back. "Starving actually." The blonde replied, hopping out of the car after Emily had opened her door for her. "Still such a romantic." She whispered softly, enjoying how the brunette always seemed to take care of her. She followed Emily to the booth and sat down. The blonde looked over the menu and then back up at Emily. "Let's share." She responded, feeling in the mood to make this moment just a tiny bit romantic. After all, a week without Emily had made her miss even the trivial things.
"Okay, I'll let you choose the type of pizza." Emily smirked. She kept her eyes on Alison, almost as though she was analyzing the blonde; however, she was just happy to be back to being somewhat close to her. She missed the little things, the way she batted her eyelashes, the way that when she'd smirk, her dimples would come popping out. It was always the little things that made her happy. After taking a few short breaths, the waitress appeared. She knew that Alison loved the meat-lovers pizza, therefore she ordered that without even letting the blonde speak. "We'll take the meat-lovers special, a medium please, with fries, onion rings, and two of the house shakes?" She handed the waitress the menu after ordering, then turned her attention to Alison.
"Mmm, milkshakes. I remember the first time we got them together. I got strawberry, my favorite and you got chocolate and you had the idea to mix them. Turned out pretty good actually." Alison smirked, letting her dimples pop out. She handed over her menu absently, her gaze still on Emily. "You ordered my favorite pizza. I thought you didn't like it though." Alison questioned, her heart warming at Emily's kindness. "Still the same old sweet Emily. Don't you dare change that." Alison reached over and gently took Emily's hand in her own.
"I grew to like it, come on. When we ordered pizza it was ALWAYS your favorite pizza, after eating it a dozen times, you learn to love it, trust me." Emily couldn't help but chuckle softly when she heard the words that came out of Alison's mouth. The blonde really did remember a lot more than she led on to. Before Alison left, the two girls would share everything, Alison never wanting to share with anyone other than Emily. "And yeah, mixing those shakes was messy, I remember!" She laughed, speaking happily, remembering all the events and memories they shared. "We managed to get some in our hair.." She looked back, remembering it all. "A lot of stuff that happened, I remember as well, but it surprises me that you remember so much, Ali." Emily stroked Alison's hand gently, looking deeply into her icy blue eyes.
"Well I'm glad I influenced you to like my favorites." Alison laughed and nudged Emily playfully. "Yeah I had to take an extra long shower to get my hair to stop being so sticky." The blonde smiled brightly and leaned across the table to kiss Emily's cheek gently. She then sat back down and looked back into Emily's dark brown eyes. "I know I don't show a lot of what I'm feeling or thinking but I do remember everything when it comes to you, Emmy. You're a part of all my best memories." Alison squeezed Emily's hand just a little tighter. "You aren't the only one who enjoyed all those things. I was just so good at hiding my emotions."
"Well, you've always been pretty.. un-emotional, if that even makes sense, but we're all the way we are for a reason, and I'd never try to change you. Even if we've been through more good than bad." Emily couldn't help but let a little blush cover her cheeks. When she was with Alison, she felt like this completely other person that she'd never met before, sometimes it was good, sometimes it was bad, but either way, she'd always loved the blonde, no matter how confusing or hard the situation got; and the situation Alison was in right now would definitely test their relationship. Emily leaned her back over the booth and sat up comfortably, placing her feet over Alison's. As the shakes arrived, Emily took the straws out of the wrappers, giving Alison her own. "It's been so long since I've had one."
"I have emotions, Emily. I can't push them away but I just don't like showing them." Alison's voice took on a somewhat defensive tone. Emily had all good intentions, but the blonde felt slightly offended by her word choice. She shook it off though, noticing from the brunette's blushing, that all was okay for now. She knew that bringing this baby into their lives would prove to be a huge challenge but somehow she knew they'd be able to handle it. The blonde had faith in their relationship again and it was thanks to Emily's decision to give her a chance to earn her forgiveness. She took a long sip of her shake and smiled. "Mmm, still as good as I remember."
After a few minutes of having their milkshakes in their hands, Emily saw the waitress approach with their pizza. "It smells so good." She added, looking at the pizza, surprised that drool wasn't going down to her chin. Once it was placed on their table, Emily served Alison first with a slice, then cut herself a piece and placed it on her plate. "I'm starving.." Before finishing her sentence, she placed a slice against her lips and bit it, almost eating half the pizza with one bite. She finally cut herself a second piece, though handed it to Alison once she noticed the blonde was finally eating. "Good, do you like it?" She questioned her, moving a little closer to the blonde on the booth.
Alison breathed in the scent of the freshly cooked pizza. For once the smell of food made her mouth water. Finally she felt like she could eat again without feeling sick or wanting to run to her room, completely forgetting her hunger, as she'd been doing the entire past week. She took the slice Emily had given her and ate it slowly, making sure her body was going to accept any food before she rushed herself. She was glad to find that the feeling of nausea didn't come and she quickly finished her first slice, eagerly taking the second one from Emily. "Thanks, Emmy. It's really good." She spoke enthusiastically and slowly licked some of the sauce off her lips.
"I'm happy you're eating." Emily whispered, truly wanting the blonde to take in some food considering it was good for the unborn child's growth. Emily stopped after two slices and then placed the straw against her lips, taking a soft sip from her milkshake. "If there's any left, you can take it home with you, if you're able to eat it, then it'll be good for leftovers." Emily smiled innocently and brightly, moving her feet away from Alison's. She enjoyed being out with her. But most of all, she enjoyed being out of Rosewood in general. "You really won't let me pay, huh?" She knew there was no arguing with Alison when it came to paying for meals.
"It feels really good to be able to enjoy food again." Alison whispered back after taking a long sip of her own milkshake. "Yeah, that'll be good. I'm sure soon I'll be waking up with hunger cravings in the middle of the night. Better get used to it now." She smiled softly and thanked the waitress who had come back with their fries and onion rings. Alison plopped a fry into her mouth and chewed it slowly, shaking her head after she'd swallowed. "Nope. This time it's on me, Killer." She smirked once again letting her dimples show.
"Okay, okay. Well, thank you." Emily smiled gratefully. She was now sitting directly beside the blonde, a genuinely happy smile upon her lips. She looked over at her, then down to her stomach; not quite sure what she was thinking about; however she seemed to be deep in thought. After grabbing an onion ring and grabbing fries as well, she ate them slowly and finally began to talk once again. "And I forgot to say so earlier, but you don't look like a zombie, you actually look amazing for someone who hasn't slept well the past week." Emily leaned into Alison just a little bit, her lips not quite touching the blonde's, however; she was breathing warm air over her face.
"You don't need to thank me, Em. It's the least I could do." Alison was happy to be able to do something simple and see that it made Emily this happy. The blonde reached out and took an onion ring, eating it slowly. She held her milkshake close to her and she drained the cup of its contents. "Mm, this milkshake is the best!" She licked her lips of the last of its remnants and smiled brightly as she turned to look at Emily. "Well thank you, but I feel like a wreck. Although the food helped a lot. Thanks for getting me out for the night." She looked into Emily's eyes, becoming speechless as she felt her warm breath against her face.
Before even getting the chance to kiss Alison, Emily pulled away and smiled, letting the blonde eat as much as she could. "Eat, more. Trust me." Emily smiled and took a final piece of onion and ate it. She kept close to Alison, making sure the blonde had enough to eat before they both left. "Can we get the check, please?" Emily asked politely as she asked the waitress so they could both head out. As soon as the waitress arrived with it, she handed it to Alison without even hesitating. "Here, I won't even look at it, wouldn't want you to get angry." She joked around, standing up from the table, offering her hand to Alison and helping her stand up. "I'll let you pay, and I'll wait at the car, okay?" She planted a sweet kiss over Alison's cheeks.
Alison took another slice of pizza and quickly finished it, realizing Emily was right. She definitely needed to eat more. She took a few more French fries as well and even a couple more onion rings. Once she finally finished, she also asked a waitress for a box for all the leftovers. The blonde took Emily's hand and stood up. "Okay, Emmy, but I couldn't be mad at you." She smiled softly and tapped Emily's nose gently. She took the check from Emily and slid her credit card in. When the waitress arrived, she handed it to her and thanked the waitress for the box. Alison packed up the rest of the food and waited for the waitress to bring her bill back.
As soon as she saw the blonde come out of the restaurant, Emily unlocked the car doors and sat inside. Once Alison joined her, she took the box of food and placed it in the back seat. She turned to Alison and caressed her cheek gently. "Just one more place, and I promise to bring you right back home, okay? You need to sleep too. Those dark circles under your eyes are a little terrifying." Emily laughed a little jokingly, then turned her eyes to the road. She drove off away from Ravenswood and into the direction of Rosewood, not wanting to tell Alison where she was going just yet, knowing the blonde would be skeptical about Emily's idea.
Alison signed the receipt and put her card away. She grabbed the box of leftovers and made her way to the car. The blonde slid into the passengers seat once Emily had unlocked the car doors. She yawned and stretched her body as best she could in the car with the seatbelt restricting her. "Okay, Emmy. But you're right. I'm exhausted." She yawned once more and rolled down the window just a little, the cold breeze helping her to stay awake for whatever Emily had planned. "I told you I looked like a zombie." She nudged Emily playfully.
"I hope you won't hate me for this Ali." Emily sighed, knowing she might touch a nerve with what.. well, more with where she was about to bring Alison. After finding a spot in the empty parking lot, turning to the blonde and taking a deep breath. "Ready?" She whispered, opening the car door and going to open Alison's. She took her hand and headed towards where she wanted to go. She walked into the mausoleum, where Alison's mom's ashes had been placed in a specific spot. As soon as she saw Alison's reaction, she felt her pull away. "No, Ali. You have to." She walked to where it said "Jessica DiLaurentis." and stopped. "You have unresolved issues, speak them out, okay? I'll stay here or I'll wait outside."
"I could never hate you, Em." Alison spoke sweetly, though she was suddenly nervous about what Emily was thinking. The blonde nodded and hopped out of the car. She took Emily's hand and intertwined her fingers with the brunette's. As soon as she took notice of where Emily was going, Alison began to pull away. She yanked her hand back and stood still. "Em. No. I can't." She tried to run back to the car, but Emily was too quick and clung to her wrist, forcing her to stay. "I...I can't do this." She whispered, tears already forming in her eyes as she practically begged for Emily to let her leave.
"Ali, I didn't come here to hurt you..." Emily frowned, knowing this might probably be a bad idea, however she saw the way Alison looked when she spoke about her mom, sure, she missed her, but she also tried to bury her daughter alive, and that sure didn't settle well with a lot of people. "I saw the look you had on your face when you talked about missing her. There's something you wanna say to her, Ali. There has to be. You haven't seen her in a long time, and you need to do this, you just don't know it yet.." Emily mumbled staying back a little bit, letting Alison approach her mother's tombstone. She really didn't want to force the blonde, but she knew that it was best for her.
"Emily. I can't. This is too much." Alison protested, the emotions becoming too much for her to handle. Emily was pushing her and she knew deep down the brunette was right but it just had been so hard on her lately with everything going on. "I miss her so much, Em." Alison whispered through her tears. She finally approached mom's tombstone and reached up to trace over her name that was engraved into it. "Mom...I miss you. I wish you were here. You'd get me through this pregnancy. I...it's so hard without you. But..." Alison paused, thinking about the grudge she still held against her mother. "I...I don't know how to forgive you for burying me. Why didn't you hear me yelling that I was alive? You almost killed me instead of saving me." Alison whispered her words, her hand still upon her mother's engraved name as a fresh set of tears rolled down her cheeks.
Emily stood back, wanting to give Alison a little bit of privacy to talk to her mother. She listened in on the conversation, sighing softly, knowing how much trouble the blonde went through, especially since the fact that Jessica did bury her body alive. Emily finally went and walked up behind Alison, placing a hand over her shoulder, caressing it to make sure she knew it was okay. After hearing what the blonde had said, she couldn't help but take a deep breath, not wanting to let a tear escape her eyes, instead; she wiped the tears from Alison's cheek, letting her finish up with all that she had to say, knowing it would feel good once she got it off her chest.
"I don't know if I can ever let that go, that you so easily buried me. But I do miss you. So much. And I love you even if you made one of the biggest mistakes you could've made." Alison finished and decided that was enough. She couldn't speak anymore as what she'd already said took a lot out of her. The blonde let her back fall against Emily's chest, leaning on her for support. "Just..hold me for a minute?" She asked the brunette in a whisper, knowing that her embrace would be the comfort she needed. "Goodbye, mom." She finally whispered, letting Emily comfort her. She wanted to leave and never come back after finally saying her goodbyes but she couldn't move just yet. Emily's hold on her kept her from feeling weak in that moment.