Monster Party
Book One: I hunt, therefore I am!
Chapter Seven: Food, Glorious Food!
"Delphi..." Her father coughed rather a bit more loudly than normal and with some help from James she fairly quickly managed to untangle herself and stand up straight.
"I'm sorry father I was just so pleased to see you had returned safely and wished to great our new guests." She replied demurely throwing in a careful curtsey that would keep her from needing to look Francis in the eye.
Luckily he father remained his usual affable self.
"That is all well and good Delphi, but I suspect that we could all get to know one another a great deal better sitting around a table eating lunch then standing out here in the open. Besides, I'm sure by now Orson will be grateful for a chance to go back inside won't you?" Her father pointed out.
Orson nodded his head very slowly.
"Yes. But what pleases me most is seeing you have returned." The towering man stated slowly.
Her father nodded in agreement and approached his manservant and placed a comforting hand on his shoulder.
"Well do not worry yourself any further on my account. Let us all head inside and see about dealing with lunch, hopefully we'll be able to find time to do a little talking in between the eating!" He predicted.
(Scene Break)
Mirri somewhat was taken somewhat askance by Doctor Fran's plans for a seating lay out, or at least as far as they concerned her (what other part of the layout should she really care about after all?) at the moment.
Understandably the Doctor himself was at the head of the table, he wish for Delphi to sit at his left and Mirri at his right. Apparently his two male servants/companions would be so busy cooking and serving that they would eat a separate meal of their own afterward.
He was also (clearly at his adopted daughter's suggestion) going to have James sit directly to Delphi's left. To her credit and as a show of the 'people skills' (in the sense of skills relating to getting along with rather than simply manipulating them) she'd gained over the last few years, this suggestion did not lead directly to Mirri tearing Delphi's head off and drinking deeply from the gushing crimson volcano that promptly erupted from her neck.
No she bore it up with the sort of faux good grace that had a great deal more to do with her existence as a human than as a vampire. After all, a proper noble lady never laughed at at a nobleman's follies in public no matter how great they were. More to the point she also did not resort to bodily harm against a rival (at least she did not inflict such harm herself) even if they had done something as brazen as deeming themselves worthy of claiming a seat next to your intended, though that would have made most parties a great deal more interesting and enjoyable in Mirri's opinion.
The key important element leading to her (temporary) acceptance of the situation was the sound of Delphi's heart.
It wasn't beating as fast as James' (people's whose heart beat went that fast tended to look even paler than Mirri and fall over dead before long) but it was still doing it's very best pitter patter. Suffice to say, if Mirri was any judge of such things, then Delphi had about as bad of a romantic crush as a girl who grew up on an island with the only other men around being her father, Orson (who had a face only his mother could love and looked about as inclined to romance as a rock) and this mysterious Felix whose acquaintance she had not met yet, but was willing to wager would be a similarly unappetizing subject for a young girl's affections.
It was understandable, and while James was only pretty in that earnest farm-boy way of his, he tended to be about as earnest as they came. So for the moment Mirri was willing to let Delphi have her crush.
Now if she tried to do something tremendously stupid like convince James that she should join him in her bed instead of Mirri's coffin at night, well then Mirri simply wouldn't have any choice but to start doing some interior redecorating using the interior contents of Delphi Vaster's body for art supplies.
Until that unlikely occurrence, she'd focus her attention on the man of the house, not that Mirri had anything approaching romantic interest in Francis Vaster (hell she barely had any romantic interest in James it was just that he was her's, and it wouldn't do for anyone else to be saddling her stallion) but it never hurt to have some emotional leverage with those in power.
That, and she as yet might get another painting of herself out of the matter.
"Now then before we have any talk let us get some food in us. I'm sure after scavenging for morsels on that beach you'll a ll be happy to see a proper meal!" Doctor Fran boasted, before ringing a silver bell.
A moment later Orson wheeled in a huge tray laden with fruits, breads, and a great side of roast beef as well. Following close behind him was Felix and it became obvious at once to Mirri why Delphi would have never imagined him as any sort of romantic partner.
Just to begin with he was dressed in a some what faded red clerical outfit with a hat of a similar nature. He had coarse black hair and gray eyes that though clearly intelligent were about as warm as a Mirri's hands.
None the less he did his utmost to appear the proper servant complete with pristine white gloves as he began to slice of chunks of the beef (licking his lips all the while suggesting his own meal couldn't come soon enough) which due to small bits of leaking blood here and there seemed to have barely been cooked at all. James eagerly took several slices though Delphi passed instead preferring to focus on the cheeses and bread.
Doctor Fran filled his plate with great helpings of everything and Mirri's companions selected what they wished. The vampire herself simply sat back and allowed things to proceed apace not really caring who was eating what.
Granted it did not take long for such behavior to cause Doctor Fran to focus an inquisitive gaze upon her.
"Is there something the matter with the selection Miriam? If there is some dish in particular you desire I can have Orson search our stocks for it." He offered politely sounding more upset than angry.
Mirri just smiled back at him, and proceeded to make a number of important looking but otherwise utterly meaningless hand gestures. She followed them up with a sentence she had memorized in countless different languages (to the point that she could even say it in cat!) for how wonderfully useful it was.
"No thank you, I worship the Great Devourer Zhakata and am going to be fasting in his honor for the next few days." The only difficulty Mirri ever suffered when using those magic words was not breaking out in mocking maniacal laughter (or at least delighted sniggering) every time she said it.
Thank goodness for those bizarre idiots in G'Henna and their bizarre notions of what constituted acceptable religious practices!
Mirri of course had not one single shred of interest in any religion that preached some manner of self restraint as a virtue, and even less when self restraint came in the form of purposely starving oneself. That said, she'd found faking piety did much more to cast off suspicion from her inability to stomach any sort of solid food or liquids besides blood than any fanciful talk of disease or personal tastes.
In fact Mirri, had probably done more to spread the word of Zhakata worship across the land than most of his actual priests given that they tended to be an insular lot who also frequently (what a surprise) dropped dead of malnutrition while on sacred pilgrimages.
"Very well then, since you won't be eating would you care to lead us in conversation?" Doctor Fran offered.
Mirri of course was only to happy, especially since this presented an opportunity to focus on her favorite topic of conversation; herself, doubly so when it came artwork with herself as the subject.
"So tell me Doctor, on our way here you mentioned that you were a painter, but we never quite got around to talking about your own artistic skills and preferences." She reminded him.
Doctor Fran put away a great forkful of beef he'd speared, chewed and swallowed quickly and then was equally prompt with his answer.
"Sadly I didn't acquire that particular interest until I arrived on this island, and so most of my work has been animal themed. I am in point of fact trying to branch out my work to include humans as well but sadly there was only so much progress I could make with so few subject." He admitted.
A triumphant smirk came to Mirri's lips at this point, the kind she typically only got after feeding. Game, set, match, she was going to be getting a painting now she just knew it!
"Well then, it would sound like our interests would would lay along exactly the same lines. Perhaps when this meal is over if you have some free time you should show me your studio and I could offer you a new model to work from?" Mirri pointed out.
Fran nodded eagerly in between stuffing with his face with more of the beef giving Alexander a chance to cut in.
"Doctor, I must admit this small little estate you've set up for yourself does seem rather idyllic. Sadly, it's been my experiences that islands off in the middle of the ocean are often plagued by men, say better monsters who rule with an iron fist. The term most frequently used in the Core to describe such people is, 'Darklords', have you ever been troubled by one?" The silver haired man wanted to know.
Doctor Fran stopped eating and put down his utensils.
"Well, I'd hope to avoid possibly ruining a good meal with ill talk, but I will not deceive you Mr. Diamondpaw. If this island has a 'Darklord' as you say, it must unquestionably be Akanga." He admitted dourly.
At the mention of the name 'Akanga' Delphi put down the loaf of bread she'd been eating and gulped in fright.
"Akanga?" Alexander repeated the name slowly to make sure he had the pronunciation right.
"That's correct. He's a broken one, a grotesque mix of lion and man, and he styles himself the king of the island. I'm not sure what his origins are, he might have been some village chieftain or medicine man before the plague came, or perhaps he was a lion brought to the island by a trade ship as some sort of exotic pet, for my research has shown the storms that torment this island were not nearly so dreadful before the coming of the plague.
Either way, it would not be hard to tell him upon sight, as far as my own studies have determined he is the only broken one on the island who resembles a lion, a fact he touts it loudly as proof of his right to rule. However his 'rule' such as it is, is devoid of compassion, mercy or even pragmatism.
Akanga teaches that his subjects must embrace the inner beast that the disease has brought to the surface. That is why I and my estate have managed to survive as long as we have, Akanga can not gather many followers to his side before his own foul teachings will reduce them to mindless beast who refuse to obey orders.
Still, he is a being of tremendous power, and if he can not lead his 'subjects' on the offensive he can at least surround himself with a huge pack of frenzied followers who he has cowed into submission to act as guard dogs.
An unsteady peace of sorts has come exist between the two of us, he mostly prowls the east side of the island, and will even send his followers to me for treatment though he himself has never come. Either because he is too proud, too crafty to injure himself in any notable way, or he is some protected and healed by some greater power than I can comprehend." Doctor Fran explained, drumming one of his huge hands on the table all the while.
"So he is given an island rule, and yet his own vices prevent from enjoying it. Akanga certainly seems to fit the mold of a Darklord, quite well doctor. The Mists crave suffering, but not always of the virtuous." Alexander reflected.
The room was now completely still with neither the host, his daughter, or his guests eating. It was broken only when Delphi turned to her left and faced James.
"So where are you from?" She asked half to try and lighten the mood half just to sate her own curiosity.
"We're from all over, but if you meant me in particular, I'm from Richemulot." James answered all too readily.
Though he had been eating as quickly as anyone else Mirri could spot the signs which suggested he was doing it not from relief but just to get the pointless experience (clearly even though the meat was near raw it still failed to meet his need for fresh flesh) over with.
Delphi clasped her hands together in joy.
"Richemulot? I've read about it in one of father's books! Is it true that their people treasure secrets more than jewelery?" She demanded perhaps not quite grasping the irony of such a question.
"It's hard to say, my family was poor in both. I grew up in a small village, and everyone tended to know everything about us. One thing I can say with confidence is that the Le Grande Dame Jacqueline Renier is every bit as beautiful as I'm sure your books must mention!
I've only seen her in person once of course, but she visited my village when I was eleven, and even brought a basket of food for my family! She wasn't snooty about it all, she was even willing to join us for a meal! She said that we were a shining example of all things Richemulotian!
It still have a hard time believing it given that my father was a simple village alchemist, nowhere near as good as my friend Cal of course, and my mother oversaw the local library. There were few moments of greater pride in my life than when I personally swore allegiance to her!" James happily gushed his eyes misting over with the warm glow of nostalgia.
Mirri had no interest in food, but she'd still been given a complete table setting, and so she now picked up the knife and began to spin it about in a manner that at least looked absentminded.
"Why don't you tell us a little about yourself Delphi, do you have any hobbies?" She asked in a voice was the very imagine of politeness.
"Well there's not a lot to do around here, as you'll sadly find out before long. But I like to read, and I like to swim." Delphi answered.
This revelation caused James (who unsurprisingly liked the prospect of submersion in water only a hair more than Mirri did) to give his head a slight shake as tossing aside imaginary droplets, and his attention returned to the here and now.
"Unless there's a pool around here you've been hiding, you'd have to be a pretty strong swimmer to safely splash about in the waves that carried us here." Cal noted only briefly taking his attention off of having a lunch even more hearty than his breakfast.
"Oh I am! Probably because I've had so much practice, but I've gotten really good at predicting the waves. I probably like to swim more than I should. Father says that's how I got the way I am in the first place, I was swimming and some water got into one of my ears. It makes it hard for me to balance, but only on land. When I'm in the water though..." She let the statement trail off sounding as wistfully nostalgic as James had a few seconds ago.
"Getting back to the plague as much as it pains me to do so..." Florence cut in.
Much like Delphi she had eschewed the meat dish instead selecting only fruits and, cheeses and grains to dine upon (while she could subside on pure photosynthesis if she had to it didn't mean she liked the experience).
"Did you notice it having a strange affect upon the trees as well as the animals?" She inquired.
Doctor Fran had just taken a mouthful of bread it caused his cheeks to swell out like a chipmunks and he struggled to chew and swallow quickly so as to rejoin the conversation.
"The trees?" He muttered in bemusement his wide open eyes squinting slightly.
"Yes, the trees, in fact..." She put down her knife and fork and wrapped a hand against the table.
"Spruce." She announced with utter certainty. She then got up and walked over to the kitchen's wooden wall and wrapped a hand against it as well.
"Fir. Those... those aren't the kind of trees I'd expect to find in the middle of a jungle!" The dryad informed them.
Doctor Fan stared at his plate of food deeply and then shook his head.
"You know, you may be onto something there, I just never realized it myself! Some of the old journals I've found talked about the island's flora in terms that seemed most unlike anything I saw with my own eyes. It's possible that whatever strange powers lay behind the plague which has warped this island's populace also transformed it's terrain for some reason.
I'm afraid I've been so caught up in my research of the broken ones and the island's remaining natural animals that I paid next to no attention to the plant life since I found it uniformly harmless beyond a few poisonous berries or mushrooms here and there." He admitted, seeming quite ashamed of his oversight.
"Don't take it too hard Doctor." Devi comforted him, unlike the other three female occupants of the room she had not turned down the chance to unleash her inner omnivore.
"Desperate and dangerous times have a way of narrowing ones perceptions." The elf stated in a void devoid of passion.
"If you've been surrounded by the broken ones since you first arrived, one could hardly fault you for... missing the forest for the trees." She added with a touch of mirth.
"Still, a true man of science must not shirk from any possible avenue of research. Perhaps I should start taking sap samples. Sap, as bizarre as it sounds it's a possible vector for the disease that I had not considered before. When dealing with mystical miladies it is best to consider every possibility!" The Doctor pondered aloud.
"You say that according to the journals you found the storms were not so bad before the plague and Akanga came along?" Alexander cut in bringing the topic of conversation back around to the island's darklord.
"Well the people who made those writings were either dead or transformed into broken ones by the time I arrived so I am only able to make rough estimates but yes I believe it is likely so." Doctor Fran admitted.
"A disease affecting weather patterns is a bit much to swallow even for a magical one. However, it is entirely possible that the storms are caused by Akanga flexing his own mystical muscles. From my experiences most darklords have some means of rendering their realm both near impossible to escape from within and impossible to invade from without. It is more fanciful in some lands than others, but on an island being able to summon up storms on command has a brutal simplicity to it." The silver man surmised.
Doctor Fran crooked his head slightly.
"I'm afraid all talk of just what Darklords are or aren't capable of goes straight over my head. I'm just a simple doctor from Larmodia myself, so savage storms were nothing truly noteworthy to me. If they are being called by Akanga's will, well the only way to be sure would be to ask him wouldn't it? Ha, talk about putting your head in the lion's mouth! I'd be just as happy to leave that particular matter to nothing more than conjecture." He declared before they all returned their attention to the meal at hand.
(Scene Break)
After the meal was finished Doctor Fran let his servants take care of cleaning up while he took his new guests on a quick tour of the his small estate. It consisted of only two of buildings, the main two story one they currently occupied, and a much smaller one with a pair of rooms in it. The smaller one he'd gone over first, since it took less than five minutes for him to show them all there was to it.
"It's my guest house, though I must admit you'll be the first guests who will be making use of it. If I'd known so many of you would be coming I would have made it bigger, but you never known how many avians you'll wind up attracting when you build a birdhouse do you?" He admitted ruefully.
That had done he had taken them back to the main building and lead them from room to room on the first floor.
"This is the library, feel free to take a look around and borrow whatever you wish. Just try to treat it with care, it shames to me admit that my own fumbling fingers have destroyed far too many precious text, and when you're trapped a desolate island like this what text isn't precious?" He pointed out.
Alexander, Cal, Devi and Florence opted to stay behind but James and Mirri stayed with the doctor to continue the tour. Mirri because she was interested in seeing the doctor's painting studio and James' natural affinity for libraries was at the moment quashed by his hunger.
(Scene Break)
Once Doctor Fran had left the room and Cal counted off a good thirty seconds he went over to a book whose spine he'd noticed shortly after being let into the library.
"Boss, I don't think it says pleasant things about our host's tastes if his collection includes this..." He picked a book of its shelf and tossed it to his leader.
Alexander caught it, and spun it around to get a good look at its title.
"Book of Insufferable Darkness..." He read slowly and took a moment to carefully weigh the tome in his hands.
Then he flipped it open, revealing that between its front and back piece there was not a single scrap of parchment. The book had been carefully hollowed out and now resting inside it was a flask. Alexander lifted it free of the book, popped the cork, sloshed its contents about taking a deep sniff, and then a long swig.
"G'Henna 710, Contrary to your thoughts on the mater Cal I'd say this suggests he has excellent taste indeed." He reflected, returning the stopper to the flask and the flask to its home within the defaced book.
Cal sighed heavily and then attempted to snatch the book back from his commander.
"Jeez boss, I've heard of booze hounds, but you're more like a booze bloodhound when it comes to sniffing out the stuff." The alchemist admitted.
(Scene Break)
"And this is my menagerie. It's not much but its at least a place for me to store the rare plague free animals I or my servants manage to capture when I'm not studying them in my laboratory." Doctor Fran explained though James cold barely hear the words.
"OH THANK GOODNESS!" He cried out sounding almost delirious with delight.
"I beg pardon?" Doctor Fran asked, not sure what to make of the young man's unbridled exuberance.
"Sorry, it's just that black leopardess, you found it recently right?" He asked while pointing in the direction of the caged beast in question.
"Yes, Orson and Felix managed secure it the same night that I first saw the smoke from your arrival. It had a wound in its side that could have gotten rather nasty if left untreated, but I managed to set it to rights before I headed out to get acquainted this morning." The doctor admitted.
James made a flippant gesture of wiping sweat off his brow.
"That's good. That leopard, it was being carried on the same ship that we were. It's nice to see we're not the only survivors, that's all. Even if she's in a cage again, you've actually got her a much bigger one for her than she used to have." He lied.
Even while James was talking to Doctor Fran every so often his eyes would flicker in the direction of the cages.
Past the black leopard, past the pair of lamas, past the five goats, past the two ferrets, past the four wild pigs, past a big cage that was currently empty (someone had scrawled "ursus" on the side of it), past some sort of large flightless bird he couldn't easily find a name for, onto the final cage in the room.
The final cage that contained a trio of rats that had to be at least two feet long each if they were an inch. James licked his lips in exactly the same manner that Felix had while cutting the beef.
End Chapter.
FN: To see more of James' meeting with La Grande Dame read the Monster Party Side Story "à mal rat, bon chat"
Also for this chapter guess I'll be addressing concerns in reverse chronological order so as to talk about what is doubtlessly freshest in your mind first.
To start with, once again I am not dropping down some kind of Deus Ex Machina for James to easily grant his desire for non sentient flesh (and non sentient rodent flesh at that!), the content of Doctor Fran's menagerie are taken exactly from the adventure book that this story is based upon. The last cage in it is said to contain not just three rats, but "three giant rats". It's not my fault if those rodents have a much greater significance to this adventuring party than they would to most. (I did alter the contents of the Book of Insufferable Darkness, but only in changing from an empty flask to one that was half full, because that makes it vastly funnier in my version)
Secondly: feel free to make a horror check at a -1, no make that a -2 penalty if you actually understood the implications of what James told Delphi about his past on your first read through.
Thirdly: Zhakata the Devourer is a "real" (long story, later books/stories will make it much more clear, let's just move along for now) deity in the Ravenloft setting, who does demand frequent (and frequently lethal) fasting sessions from his servants.