This is not my story or my ideas! I have contacted the author of this story and I have been given exclusive rights to continue this story! Please note that this is the original work of Ireland Maslow.
Since you seem to want the next chapter, here it is. I've been working on the third chapter too, but I have other stories in progress which I'm also working on. So I'm kinda jumping back and forth between them. Oh, and I do want to point out that I do proofread my chapters, but I'm sure there are still mistakes here and there. Sorry if there are. Thank you for reviewing! I honestly thought I was just going to get like maybe two reviews, but I got FIVE! Thank you!
"Hey," Logan said as he closed the door. "Hey," James replied, his tone sounding disappointed, which Logan picked up on. "You okay?" He asked, coming over to sit next to his friend. "I think I did something really stupid." James confessed, leaning forward to put his head in his hands. "What do you mean?" Logan asked, getting a little worried. James wasn't sure he should tell Logan what happened. He figured as long as he didn't tell him it was Kendall, it would be fine. He knew Kendall wouldn't want anyone to know James gave him a hand job while watching gay porn.
"I gave a hand job to a guy who was curious about gays. Afterwards, he wouldn't talk to me and when I tried asking if he was okay, he got upset, said I didn't understand why he couldn't be gay, and left. I don't know what I'm supposed to do. I was only trying to help him, but I think I made it worse." Logan seemed taken back by the situation. He didn't think that was what James was going to tell him.
"Well, maybe you need to go talk to him and let him know you were just trying to help." James sighed and rubbed his hands over his face. "The problem there, is that I don't know where he's at." "Do you care about him?" "Of course I do!" James said, looking over at Logan. He really wished he could tell Logan exactly what was going on, but he kept it to himself. No one knew about his crush. "If you really care about him, then you'll go find him and make this right." James let out a groan. He knew Logan was right. This wasn't going to get better unless they talked it out. "Fine," James said, standing up and leaving the apartment. He wasn't sure where Kendall could have gone. He went to the lobby, the pool, the park, and then double checked them. He didn't think Kendall would have gone to the studio. He decided to check the ice rink down the road from The Palm Woods.
After getting to the rink, he walked in and looked around. Kendall didn't have his gear, so it was doubtful that he would be on the ice. He finally located the blond sitting on one of the benches with his head in hands. He walked over and stood next to him. "James, just leave me alone, please," Kendall said in a begging tone. "Not until you talk to me." James said stubbornly. "Kendall, I didn't mean to make things more complicated for you. I was just trying to help." "I know, James, I know. I'm not mad at you." Kendall rubbed his eyes with the heels of his hands before looking at James. "What am I going to do if I really am gay? What are people going to say? What will my family think? My fans? The media?" Kendall's tone showed just how scared he was.
"Kendall, remember when I came out? How hard it was for me? Then Gustavo saying that I being gay was going to really up the bands status? Once I came out, I had thousands of mean comments every day. People telling me how gross I was, how much they hated me being gay, fans saying that I couldn't be gay because then they couldn't have me. They made me feel like I made a mistake, that I was a mistake. But you know what? I don't care about that anymore. I have more people who support me than those who hate me."
Kendall stared down at the floor for a long time before looking up at James. "How did you know? That you were gay, I mean."
"I knew once I realized I was more attracted to a certain guy than any girl before him. I couldn't have him, so I found someone else, a girl. I denied it at first, said I was just getting the feelings confused. But while I was dating that girl, I was thinking about that guy. I broke up with her because it wasn't fair to her since I didn't know what I was. I finally accepted that I was gay after a year of denying it, maybe longer now that I think back." James said, fiddling with the hem of his shirt.
He wanted to tell Kendall that he was that certain guy, but didn't want to scare him more. He had always kinda gravitated toward the blond from the time they met. "Who was the guy?" Kendall asked without looking at James. James bit his lip. He didn't want to lie, but he also didn't want to tell Kendall it was him. "You don't know him," he knew that was a stupid lie. He and the guys hadn't been apart much since they met, so there were very few people they didn't all know. Growing up in a small Minnesota town didn't help either. "Who was it, James?" Kendall asked again, looking up with a knowing look in his eyes, along with fear. James looked into Kendall's green eyes, still biting his lip.
"It's me, isn't it? You like me? Oh man, I just let you do... that... to me while you have a crush on me. You took advantage of me for your own pleasure? What did you think? That I was going to enjoy it and let you take it farther? Is that why you asked if I was curious about anything else? You're a pervert!" Kendall didn't care that he was yelling. James couldn't stand seeing the hurt look on Kendall's face or the tears in his beautiful green eyes. He thought James was trying to help, but now he realized that James was trying to fill his sick fantasy. "Kendall, I do like you, but that wasn't why I did that. I swear I wasn't trying to take advantage of you! I didn't even mean for it to go as far as it did!" James said in a begging tone. Kendall just shook his head as the tears escaped. "You know what, just don't talk to me, and don't you dare ever touch me again." Kendall turned and walked away from James.
James knew he had to find a way to make this right. He had to prove to Kendall that he wasn't trying to hurt him. That was never the point of what he did. He didn't mean to hurt the blond. James stood and started back home. He tried to think of what he could do to make things better. Talking to Kendall wasn't going to help and neither would having someone else talk to him. Maybe Kendall just needed time. He couldn't stay mad at him forever could he? He decided it was best to just leave Kendall alone for now. Maybe convince Logan or Carlos to switch rooms for the time being. He wanted Kendall to come around on his own time. He wasn't going to force it. He really wanted Kendall to understand that he cared about him.
Kendall wasn't at the apartment when James got back but Carlos and Logan were. He explained that they had a fight and asked if one of them would switch rooms for a while. Carlos offered to do it, which James was thankful for. Logan stared at him for a long time. James hoped he didn't figure it out. But being the brainiac he was, he would put two and two together. He would have to deal with that when the time came. James and Carlos moved what they need to each other's rooms. This wasn't a permanent switch, so they wouldn't have to move all their stuff. He kind of wished Logan was switching with him. He didn't want to be stuck in the same room with Logan once he started to put it all together. Which wouldn't take long. He knew it was just a matter of time before he was asking questions.
It was close to nine that night before Kendall returned home. He didn't even look at James, he just went to the bedroom. Kendall stopped before getting on the bed, remembering what happened there this afternoon. I just shook his head and stripped the comforter and sheets from the bed. He piled them up in the corner of the room and went to get the extra blankets his mom kept in her room. He couldn't bring himself to sleep on the bedding he was taken advantage of on. It was bad enough he had to sleep in the same bed. He felt betrayed. He never thought that his best friend would be the one to take advantage of him, to use him.
It just wasn't right. Was James really that big of a perv? Kendall felt the tears coming again. He tried to think of something else. He was honestly hurt by what James did. He had always been a little attracted to James, but he didn't think anything of it. Until he thought he was gay, that is. He couldn't believe James tried to convince him he was helping when really he was looking for a way to get Kendall to willing let him molest him. Kendall crawled into his bed, not caring that it was only nine. He just wanted to sleep. He didn't want to think about this anymore. He wished it hadn't happened. He wished he had just told James no and left. He really felt dirty now, like he had been molested by a creep. He couldn't help but view James that way. He felt taken advantage of and that wasn't going away any time soon.
Aw, poor Kendall. :( Like I said, I am working on the next chapter. But I will be away this weekend from tomorrow afternoon until sometime Sunday. I'm spending the weekend with my best friend. :DReview please! :D Oh, and to new readers, if you like me, I have a Facebook "fan page." I normally post about my stories, let you know when they've been updated and or ask for suggestions if I'm having trouble. I also post pics of the BTR guys sometimes. It's Ireland Maslow, it's should be the first thing that comes up. So "Like" it if you want. :)