I've been thinking
Just sitting thinking sitting
On why I love you
And all my reasons
And if I lost you
Boy, if I lost you
I'd lose myself

16 weeks and 3 days pregnant

Monday December 19th

I hear a buzz of voices around me. I try to resurface but can't find the will to. I try to move my fingers and break through the blackness but I am too weak. I use all my strength to open my eyes but fail. I use my ears and see if I can pick up on anything….I can hear people moving around me and….maybe feel someone holding my hand? I want to so badly wake up and comfort whoever is holding my hand like a vice. Instead I can't help but slip back into the darkness.

I don't know how much later it is, but I feel a lot more awake now and can remember a lot more things. Am I awake? I still feel someone holding my hand. It's a lot more quieter now. I can hear some deep breathing and maybe pacing? I feel so confused. What happened? Last thing, I think I remember, was talking to my dad and getting something to drink…. I finally open my eyes and when I do, I find I am anywhere but the kitchen. I look around and my dad is across the room leaning against the wall staring at the coffee in his hand. I look to my other side and Damon is sitting on a chair next to my bed, holding my hand. He's looking down at his lap not knowing that I am awake now.

Looking around I see I am in the hospital.

I feel panic rising in my chest and squeeze his hand and within a millisecond Damon's head snaps up and a small smile comes across his face.

"Hey." He says softly.

"What happened?" I race out trying to sit up.

Damon's hand comes across my chest gesturing me back down and I am far too weak to fight, so I go along with it.

"You passed out." My dad says walking over to me.

"…What?" I whisper. "How..? Why…?" I say disoriented.

"The doctor ran some tests and you have a case of severe anemia and malnutrition. Those two combined along with stress was too much…" My dad trails off.

My hand flies to my stomach. Scared I lost him or her.

"Baby is fine." Damon chokes out next to me.

I sigh in relief.

Thank god….

"So it's healthy…?" I reassure looking between both my dad and Damon.

They both nod.

"They did an ultrasound while you were asleep and everything is fine. Actually perfect. The little heartbeat was strong. All good." Grayson smiles.

"And he was awake." Damon smirks. "Was rolling around and kicking. Doctor said you should be able to feel that soon because he is so active."

I scowl at him. "He? I told you Damon, it will be a she."

He rolls his eyes. "Yeah sure…..We'll see." He jokes lightly.

I'm about to make a remark but the doctor walks in through the door.

"Hello, Elena." He says kindly.

"Hi." I say shyly.

"I'm Dr. Embry." He shakes my hand. "We gave you some drugs to sleep. Your body needed it."

"How long was I asleep?" I ask curiously.

"About…ten hours." He shrugs. "More importantly. Your baby is fine. Which a lot of us were worried about." He says glancing at Damon and my dad. "But you however, are severely anemic and malnourished. We gave you IV fluids and prescribed you vitamins and iron pills." Dr. Embry explains.

I nod. "How did I get anemia?" I ask numbly.

"Well anemia can be caused by many things ranging from bad diet to vitamin deficiency or sometimes just pregnancy alone. It takes more blood to pump through you and your baby. That is why we always tell woman to eat well. You need extra nutrients. Also looking at how you are only sixteen that can also be a risk factor." He informs.

"So I just need to eat better?" I ask.

"Not exactly. You will have to take iron and vitamin pills as well as eat well." He tells me. "What did you eat over the past week or few days?" He asks looking at the chart.

"Uhm…" I trail off thinking. "Well, the past few weeks I ate very well thanks to Damon." I gesture to him. "But the past few days I ate….a few bites of spaghetti." I confess.

"Is that all for that past few days?" He says taken aback.

I nod.

"Elena." Damon almost growls.

Well, I'm in trouble.

"Sorry." I whisper looking down.

"Elena, you have to take this seriously because it can result in a miscarriage or birth defects. We caught it before it got too bad, but we have to watch this." Dr. Embry says seriously.

I hear Damon let out a shaky sigh near me.

I feel tears come to my eyes and I wipe them with my hand.

"Lena, it will be okay. Just listen to the doctor okay?" My dad comforts.

I nod still wiping my tears.

"On the good side the heartbeat is excellent. Usually after something like this the baby might also be stressed but nothing is affecting this little sucker. It's a fighter." The doctor laughs lightly.

We all join in.

My stubborn little Gilbert/Salvatore.

The doctor goes over a few more things with us and informs I can leave in the morning which is in a few hours. Thank god. I just want to go home.

My dad left to give us sometime together much to my shock.

Me and Damon don't talk about our drama or issues. We are too thankful to not loose our little miracle. Of course we have to talk about it. But now is not the time.

"I am sorry Damon for not eating…I know that was important and I failed." I sigh.

"Elena, it's not like you purposely did it. I forgive you. Haven't you been taking your prenatal pills?" Damon asks.

I shake my head. "Lost them."

He groans. "I need to keep you under 24/7 watch." He half jokes.

I laugh lightly. "Probably."

He sighs and sits up taking off his jacket then shoes. I look at him like he is crazy but he walks closer and closer to my bed before he sits on it and lies next to me.

"What-Da-What are you doing-?"

He cuts me off. "Shhh. I know we have a lot to talk about, but just let me hold you…." He pleads.

I give in and nod.

He scoots closer and I rest my head on his chest.

This scary experience today taught me something.

You have to forgive and move on.

Damon made a mistake. Yes. But so did I when I got pregnant. I can't go around acting like I am mad, when I am just jealous. Time is limited. This might be the worst decision I have ever made in my life, to forgive him and let him back in, but it feels like the best decision as my head is resting on his chest.

We both said things we didn't mean the past few days. I overreacted due to my feelings that he didn't know and he made an impulse decision. We both said things to hurt one another but that's what we do. We fight.

We yell at each other until we're blue in the face and say horrible things but in the end we always end up like this. Together. Me in his arms or my head on his chest. Not such a bad way to end up huh?

All the sudden, my emotions get the best of me. I feel my throat start to constrict and my shoulders shake. Everything from this weekend comes crashing down. Me and Damon's fallout, almost loosing the baby. I don't think it could have gone worse. I hold him tighter as I let the tears fall.

"Shh….don't cry….." He rubs my back.

I sit there and let all my emotions out while cradling my stomach. Every now and then Damon will rub it. Both of us just thankful that it's healthy. You know that saying, you don't know what you have till it's almost gone. Well, that goes for Damon and my child. I almost lost both of them. I don't know how long I cry but I slowly slip into sleep with Damon still holding me. Us.

Damon POV

I can tell Elena is asleep by her breathing and I let out a deep breath. This day has been so god damn stressful. Probably the most stressful day I have been through my entire life. I am surprised I didn't get 100 speed tickets racing over here. The thoughts that were running through my head during that time were dark and agonizing. I cringe even thinking about them. I had no clue what condition she was in or anything. I was clueless.

I whirl my car into the parking lot almost hitting the one next to mine. I jump out of the car and slam the door before I run to the front desk angrily and look around having no clue where to go. I am about to scream for someone to find her when I hear my name being called.

"Damon!"

I turn towards the voice and see Grayson waving his arms gesturing me to follow him. I go after him and we pace down the halls.

"Grayson! Tell me, what is going on?"

"She is fine Damon." He says shakily. "Fainted, but they are pumping her with stuff now." Grayson tells me while we are still walking down the hall.

I feel my breathing pick up. He still hasn't said anything about the baby. Of course Elena's health is more important but I don't know what I would do if the baby…..I shake my head, and dispel the thoughts immediately from my mind, frustrated that they were even there in the first place. He will be fine. We walk down a few more corridors before he leads me into a room. I sigh in relief. Elena is laying on the bed and looks somewhat okay. I look in the corner and see an ultrasound machine.

Before I even sit down a doctor-looking person comes in. Someone better just tell me soon what the hell is going on….

"Hi, I'm Bethany and I will be doing an ultrasound." She smiles

"Why are you doing one again?" I cough.

Grayson answers this time.. "Due to the stress on the body they want to make sure the baby is okay and that the heart rate isn't elevated."

I nod numbly.

I sit in a chair at the end of the hospital bed with Grayson on one side and the ultrasound technician on the other. I feel my hands shaking. I just hope he's okay. I breathe in and out as evenly as I can while she lifts up Elena's gown and applies gel on her stomach.

Wow. In the few days I have been gone I didn't realize how much I missed Elena's belly. I sound like a fucking idiot but I missed just rubbing it or seeing it. I read this week the baby can hear voices but I haven't been able to talk to it….I feel like I have missed out on so much and it has only been a few days.

"Okay." She says moving around and putting gel on the stick. "Here we go."

All or nothing.

The second she puts the stick down on Elena's belly the most amazing and wonderful sound I have ever heard, echoes in the room.

The fucking heartbeat.

Thank the lord.

I could kiss the ground right now.

I hear Grayson laugh behind me. "Stubborn little thing." He says with relief.

I chuckle lightly.

"You will appreciate a stubborn baby now but when it grows up it will be a different story." Bethany jokes.

At this point, I don't care. As long as he or evens she is okay. And Elena is okay.

I am okay.

My family.

Family? What am I talking about? Is that what I want? I feel my heart rate pick up and my thoughts go on overdrive. I always thought I'd one day get a procedure done, cutting me off from having kids. They were never on my outlook. Though I also never gave it a whole lot of thought, it had only been a fleeting notion. It wasn't something that I'd have constantly on my mind. But now it's the only thing on my mind.

I don't want a white picket fence.

Fuck that.

That's boring and not something I want.

I want a girl I can laugh with and have fun with, despite if we have a kid. I want to still be spontaneous, take trips for the hell of it. I want to spoil my girl and kiss her and love her the same way I did the first day I laid eyes on her. I also want to fight with her and have so much passion and be consumed by it. I want that. But not with any woman. Only one…..

"So everything looks more than fine. Actually perfect. Good size and weight for this stage. Great heart rhythm. You have nothing to worry about right now." She smiles taking more pictures.

I hear both me and Grayson sigh in relief. This baby means so much to both of us now. He already feels like family. Cause he is.

"Look at how it's moving!" The technician points. "Very active. Some babies aren't but this little one sure is. She will definitely feel that soon." She nods taking more pictures.

Oh god. I freak out when I touch her stomach let alone if I felt a kick I would probably pass out. So much for a bad ass.

The technician eventually leaves the room, followed by the doctor who came in and confirmed what the technician already told us that the baby is fine but Elena needs to be more careful. I swear I am locking her in a padlock cell with everything padded on the edges. Girl brings trouble to her.

I mean she did have sex with me.

What more proof do you need? Girl is a danger magnet.

Many doctors come in and out and we are hardly alone with everyone asking us questions and checking on Elena and the baby's heart. After several hours It is finally quiet in here. I am thankful to finally take a few breaths and lean back in my chair.

"Tough day, huh?" Grayson asks.

"That's an understatement." I grumble rubbing my eyes.

"You know, I should still be mad at you and shoot you with my shotgun but I am glad you are here. I know you two will get over this eventually. Elena is just a stubborn little thing….might take awhile but you will get there." Grayson encourages.

I smile having a little more hope in me. I just hope he is right.

"I fucked up." I admit. "I really did. But I really lo….care about her and I will do anything to make it up to her." I admit.

Grayson looks at me with his eyebrows raised, before laughing. "You love my daughter don't you?"

I blush.

I fucking blush.

"U-uhm." I stutter and freeze not knowing what to say.

"It's okay Damon." He waves off. "I knew the moment I found you and my daughter on the couch together asleep. And you think I am just a dumb old man?" He laughs a little but then turns serious. "She loves you too, you know..?" He looks at me pointedly.

I laugh and shake my head. "Trust me, the things she has said to me in the past week will qualify as different." I scoff at his statement.

"That girl over there, is more stubborn than her mother, and that's saying something. God have mercy for your kid." Grayson jokes sadly.

I smile sadly with him. "I don't think I have ever told you before but I am kind of sorry….about you know…knocking up your daughter." I chuckle lightly.

Grayson laughs. "Hey, it's in the past. I am just excited to meet the little rascal. I just wish her mom was here to see this and meet her grandchild." Grayson shrugs.

"Yeah, I wish she was too." I say honestly. "I can tell Elena wants her to be here badly too even if she doesn't talk about it often."

"That's Elena for you. If she ever says she is fine, it most likely means she isn't." Grayson says seriously. "Remember that."

Grayson is a pretty cool guy, you know, once he moves past the whole getting his daughter pregnant thing. I am glad my kid will have a pretty awesome grandpa. I just hope once Elena wakes up and we talk we can move past this thing between us. Because if this day taught me anything it's that you can loose something in a blink of an eye. I can't loose her. I will fight for her. Her and our kid. They are my whole world now. I don't know where I would be or doing without them. When I first found out, from Elena dropping her vitamins, the first thing I thought was, yes. I was waiting for something to come into my life to change it dramatically. I didn't like how I was living even though I told myself I did. I took a few days off school to wrap my head around it. I thought I would be mad and get scared but I found myself those few days, getting excited. Excited for the new change in my life. The new life I created. Not just with anyone I had a one night stand with.

Elena.

Thank god it didn't happen with anyone else.

I wouldn't want anyone else carrying my kid. Hell no.

I tried to talk to her after that night, quickly realizing my attraction for her was more than physical but she avoided me. That is, until the kid. So yeah there is some insecurity surrounding her feelings for me. But hell I just want her to be happy.

Groaning, I roll around till I get comfortable and just pray Grayson will be gone for awhile because I want to sleep with this girl in my arms while I can. Who knows when the next time will be. Closing my eyes I drift off into a happy sleep, dreaming about my little family.

Elena POV

"Wow….you two make up fast."

Drifting back and forth from sleep, I groan before opening my eyes. Me and Damon are intertwined and I am pressed up close against his chest while my head is in the crook of his neck. We are so close, that our bodies are burning from all the heat. I can hear every shallow breath from him. I finally look around for what woke me up and my heart stops seeing my dad next to the bed smirking.

Great.

"Uhm…hi." I croak slowly waking up.

"Well, you should get dressed, they are discharging you any second." My dad explains while moving around the room gathering our stuff.

I nod.

I start nudging Damon.

Man he is a heavy sleeper. Well, this won't help when the kid wakes up in the middle of the night. Great. Something to look forward to. Or maybe with some miracle the baby inherits Damon's trait and sleeps the whole night when we first bring her home…yeah, a girl can wish.

"Damon." I say getting annoyed.

He groans into the pillow and I can't help but smile. He is like a little kid when waking up. It is kind of adorable.

"Damon, we have to leave." I say lightly in his ear.

That obviously wakes him up more. He sighs before stretching and sitting up.

About time.

I stand up and feel a little dizzy but it goes away before I can fall. Whew.

"Elena, you okay to walk?" My dad says across the room.

I nod.

"Yeah, I'm fine."

I see my dad and Damon share a weird look before looking back at me.

"We'll go get you a wheelchair" They both say at the same time.

They walk out the room before I can object. Weird.

We gather all our stuff, sign the papers and before we know it, I am out of this depressing place. Damon and my dad go on about, how things will change with my eating habits. I couldn't agree more. I didn't think it was a big deal but this experience changed that thought. I could have lost her. I really could have. Luckily, I didn't. But it was too close for my comfort. I honestly don't know what I would do, if I lost her. I have finally accepted, she is my life now and I honestly don't want it any other way. So if she was gone, I would have no life. I wouldn't know what to do. It scared me to my core, when I woke up in the hospital and didn't know if she was okay.

We get home and I am so happy I am here. Through everything that has happened, I just wanted to be home. Letting out a sigh I head up the pathway with my arm in Damon's. They won't listen to me. I keep telling them, I can walk, but I think it will take awhile for them to trust my choices concerning my health.

"So, what do you want to eat Elena?" Grayson asks as we make our way through the house.

"Some Alfredo pasta?" I ask.

"Sure." My dad nods.

I look up at Damon. "Do you want to talk?" I nod my head upstairs.

A flash of something, insecurity maybe, crosses his face before he nods. We head up to my room. Well, let's do this. We have things to talk through. We can't act like it never happened, because it did. We are still teenagers but we have to act like adults. We can't run from this, even though I want to, so bad.

I close the door behind us and we both sit on the edge of my bed.

"So…." He fidgets.

"I want to say sorry, Damon" I look up sincerely in his eyes. "I know you think I am crazy for saying that and didn't expect it but I want to take some blame. I overreacted. I did. I admit it. I thought we were getting close and you were changed into this nonexistent man I wanted, but I was wrong. And I'm glad I was Damon. I like you, just the way you are." I whisper.

I look up to see his reaction, after he doesn't reply but he is just looking at me.

"Well, aside from the sleeping with random woman." I laugh. "But don't change who you are, for me."

He coughs after a moment. I wonder if he is getting emotional about what I just said but when he replies with a strong voice I dismiss it.

"You are crazy, Elena Gilbert. You do not need to apologize for this." He scoffs. "I slept with that woman. And I hate it. I always hated sleeping with girls like that. I did. I do…" He sighs. "Elena, I have to tell you something."

My heart stops but then picks up wondering what he is about to say. It's either really good or really bad.

"…Katherine sent that text. She was after us. Hopefully I stopped her before she does anymore damage…but she knows me, Elena. She knew I would freak out when you weren't where you said you were. And she knew I would do something stupid." He laughs bitterly.

"She sent that?" I gasp.

He nods.

"God she is so pathetic." I chuckle.

He joins in. "That she is." He laughs before turning serious. "But I am sorry, Elena. We were kind of ignoring our problems back then and just living a fairytale. But this isn't a fairytale. We are teenagers having a baby." He says bluntly. "This is not going to be easy. Hell we only talked three times before we had sex…but Elena…I will never leave you again." He say intensely his eyes gazing into mine.

I am taken aback by the meaning. And feel tears fighting their way through, but I swallow them back down. "Thanks….thanks for apologizing for that and Damon I know you were worried, I would leave you and not want you in our lives." I say rubbing my protruding belly. "But I do. I really do okay?" I assure.

He smiles. A true genuine smile. Not a smirk.

"How about, from here on out, we don't make any rash or idiotic decisions and be honest?" He challenges.

I nod and hold out my hand. "It's a deal, Salvatore."

He shakes my hand and laughs. "Now that, that's over. Lets go feed you and the little munchkin" He smirks briefly touching my belly.

"Let's" I agree.

We all eat the pasta and ignore the past few days. Just eating and talking, it's nice. If you told me a few months ago, I would be in my kitchen with Damon and my dad eating pasta and us all getting along, I would laugh in your face. It's amazing how things turn out sometimes. I like it.

I wasn't really hungry but I forced myself to eat. The doctor told me when you don't eat, your stomach gets smaller, so I just need to eat more and more, for my body to get used to it. I would do anything at this point to not have a repeat of yesterday. Once we are all finished, we head to the living room and turn on the TV. I lay with my head in Damon's lap while my dad has the recliner. This is comfortable.

It feels nice. With my head on his lap and his fingers playing with my hair. I can hear every breath of his. It feels so intimate but natural. I catch my dad sneaking peeks at us but I ignore him. I don't know what his problem is. We are watching some unknown show from ABC. I am not really paying attention. I am really close to going to sleep when the door open and I hear laughter.

I sit up and look around, confused who that is.

We hear banging near the front door and more laughs. What the hell is going on. I sit up and everyone follows as I near the front door. When I walk around the corner I gasp. Oh my god. I can't believe it.

Bonnie is pressed against the wall, with her legs wrapped around my brothers waist while they are sucking each other's faces off. They seem to notice us and Bonnie's feet are quickly joined with the ground again. Embarrassment and both guilt is written all over their faces. Well, mainly Bonnie's. Jer seems to look pissed that we interrupted.

"I thought you guys were at the hospital?" Jeremy says harshly.

It takes a few moments for us to regain our composure before my dad answers. "….We-uhm, well….we got out earlier than we thought." Grayson coughs.

"You going to explain what's going on?" I ask looking between them.

"Nothing to explain, Elena. I am allowed to make out with my girlfriend." Jeremy says obviously.

I raise my eyebrows and turn to Bonnie but she looks away blushing.

"You guys, just started dating and you are already practically having sex out in the hallway?" I say taken aback.

"Oh come on, Elena." Jeremy rolls his eyes. "You had sex with Damon and you knew him far less. It's not like, I don't know how to use a condom." Jeremy says and adds a glare in Damon's direction but Damon just glares back.

"Oh shut up Jer-"

But my dad cuts me off, before I can argue back. "Okay, lets calm down here. Elena take yourself and Damon up to your room. Bonnie and Jeremy….uh, I guess we can talk in the living room."

"What the fuck, Dad!" Jeremy yells. "You're letting Elena be in a room alone with Damon but I am getting the sex talk?!" Jeremy exasperates.

"First of all, Jeremy, do not yell at me." My dad says with authority. "Secondly, Elena is pregnant. Not much that can happen. And trust me I think the sex talk is long gone with you. I was going to talk about, when the hell this relationship happened."

Jeremy groans, listening to my father. My dad is basically the only person Jeremy will listen to. Sometimes. Bonnie shoots me a look that screams 'sorry' but I turn around and drag Damon to my room.

"I can't believe that." I rant pacing around my room while Damon is sitting on my bed watching.

"She bitched at me, about not telling her, I was pregnant and she doesn't tell me she has a boyfriend? Who is my freaking brother!?" My voice raises.

"Elena, calm down." Damon says getting up and rubbing my arm.

"No, Damon….ugh!" I rub my hands over my face.

"Hey, let's look on the bright side…" Damon thinks over. "Jeremy never has girlfriends right? Just booty calls? Well now he does. That is a good sign." Damon points out.

"With my friend!" I holler at him. Damn, these hormones are hard to control. "He could have chosen anyone. Ugh." I say, still pacing.

"We can't be too hypocritical. They are dating. We weren't when we had sex." Damon shrugs.

"That-that was different" I differ.

Damon laughs. "But it wasn't, Elena. Look, yeah, it's kind of shitty they didn't tell you but probably because they knew you would react this way. But they are dating, they are allowed to do that stuff…."

"Now you are siding with them?!" My voice shrieks. I can definitely feel my hormones go all over the place.

Poor, Damon.

Damon grimaces knowing this is my hormones talking. And I feel guilty.

I take a few deep breathes, calming myself, before I sit down next to him.

"Sorry." I groan. "It just makes me so mad….and little munchkin doesn't help." I laugh rubbing my stomach.

He smiles and puts his hand on my stomach too. "Did you know he can hear our voices now?" Damon smiles.

There he goes again, with the he.

"I didn't. I am behind on my pregnancy books." I pout.

He continues to rub my stomach. Almost entranced by it. "Yeah, he can hear everything that is going on. And when he is born he will recognize us, by our voices."

I feel tears welling in my eyes.

"Really?" My voice cracks.

He nods.

We quickly find ourselves laying down on my bed with me in his arms. He always cradles me so well, almost like his arms were built for this. We always end up this way. It's funny how we go from fighting and hating each other to this. But I wouldn't have it any other way. I love him. And I love this. I like how our relationship takes drastic turns and crazy roads. I like that. I just hope he does too.

16 weeks and 4 days pregnant

Tuesday December 20th

For the first time in a few days I wake up happy. Me and Damon solved our misunderstanding and moved on like adults. It's insane how much we have both grown over the past several months. Creating a child really does change you.

Damon left late last night after we took a short nap on my bed. Both exhausted still from the hospital stay and stress. When we went downstairs Grayson told us Bonnie and Jeremy left awhile ago. God knows where.

After calming down I realize, I don't mind her dating my brother. Even though she said, bad boys are not for her, and my brother is the definition of a bad boy. But it's that she hid it from me. Yeah, I kept my pregnancy from her but that was different! Right? Do they not trust me enough to know about their relationship?

I lay here rubbing my belly which I find I am doing a lot lately and talking to myself. Jeremy never came back after last night and I will not call Bonnie first. She can call me. I roll over seeing if I can get more sleep when I hear a loud knock on the door. I groan and ignore it, knowing my dad will get it.

I hear voices downstairs but I can't distinguish them so I try by best to ignore them and go back to sleep. Just when I am about to drift into unconsciousness, my dad calls for me.

"Elena, come down here!"

Ugh.

I get up and put my slippers and robe on before making my way downstairs. Once I am outside my bedroom door, I immediately know who those voices belong to. I race downstairs to see why everyone is here at ten am.

When I arrive down there Helen, Damon and my dad are all sitting around the living room. I walk in hesitantly not knowing what's going on.

"Elena, my dear!" Helen greets and stands up to kiss both of my cheeks.

"Hi." I blush.

I look over at Damon and he smiles apologetically.

I sit down on the empty loveseat while Helen is on the other loveseat with Damon.

"I just had to come over to make sure you were okay." Helen says with worry. "Damon told me to give you space. I wanted to come the minute he told me but he held me back." She shoots him a glare. "But I couldn't wait any longer. I brought you some of my homemade Fettuccini. Recipe passed down through generations of Salvatore's." She says proudly.

"Thanks, so much." I smile genuinely. "I always need food. Whatever you guys cook, little one here craves it." I look down and rub my belly.

"She is Italian, that is why my dear!" Helen laughs.

We all laugh.

"It's so nice of you to stop by." My dad smiles. "Did Damon tell you what the doctor said?"

She glares at her son. "Practically had to force it out of him but he did. And girl, I will be bringing you and little bambina lots of my dishes. Expect many!" She laughs.

"I will!" I sit up. "I love them. One of the only things my body really craves." I nod vigorously.

"Well, Mom, that was a great visit, so we can go now." Damon says quickly trying to stand up but Helen pushes against his chest, roughly, so he is forced to sit down again.

"Hold your horse's boy!" She says to him before turning to me again. "How are you feeling, Elena?" She says sympathetically.

I smile. "I am doing well. I am back on my shakes and vitamins and also eating more, so I have way more energy."

"That's excellent"

"So where is Giuseppe, Helen?" Grayson asks.

She waves her hand. "Oh him, he said it was too early for him and that I was crazy for getting out of bed but I had to come and see." She smiles.

"Well, you did so we should probably go." Damon rushes.

"Boy, if you try to make me leave again, I will make sure you can't have any more kids." She warns. "But then again, that might be a good thing for awhile…" She thinks over.

I laugh at her response and it earns a glare from Damon.

"I don't like that you two are getting along." Damon gestures between us.

"Oh, get that stick out of your butt, Salvatore." I roll my eyes. "So Helen, tell us some embarrassing stories!" I perk up.

"Oh, there are so many." She says excitedly. "One time, he asked why I wore makeup and I told him to look pretty, so the next day, I walk in on him with makeup all over him. Poor boy, didn't know how to use eyeliner. Bless him."

Me and my dad loose ourselves to laughter. If my eyes were open right now I would guess, Damon's sending me a murderous glare.

"Another time, I had to pick him up from pre-school, because he cut all his hair off. Said he needed a haircut." Helen laughs.

"Wow. Damon…I just hope our kid is smarter." I joke instinctively rubbing my belly.

"Ha, ha. I won't forget about this, you two." He warns.

"Oh, blah, blah, blah. You can't hurt a pregnant woman." I smirk.

"She's right. She is in the clear. And I am your mother. Sorry honey, you are screwed." Helen smiles.

We all hang out and talk safe subjects for a couple hours. We watched two Christmas movies and I couldn't stop laughing from all the jokes she told about Damon whenever she could. I can tell whenever she merely talks or looks at him how much motherly love she has for him. I can feel it. I also can relate on the same level. I haven't even met my kid but I am sure whenever I talk about her I will have hearts in my eyes.

"Well I better go. Giuseppe can hardly live without me for too long." She laughs. "Oh and Elena if you can, come over on Christmas. I have a present for you and bambina" She perks up.

"Oh you didn't ha-"

But she cuts me off. "Yes I did." She says seriously. "Whether you like it or not, you and our little bambina are part of the family now." She says firmly.

I blush and smile shyly. "Thanks…it's weird to think a year from now, I will be buying my baby gifts." I laugh nervously.

"Oh honey, a year from now all of us will be buying that baby gifts. I swear she will be the most spoiled baby in Virginia." She says proudly.

"He." Both Damon and my dad correct.

Me and Helen roll our eyes.

We all get up to walk her to the door.

"Are you coming with me son?" Helen asks.

"I want to stay here but….you drove me." Damon says awkwardly.

"I can drive you home?" I nod to Damon.

"No…No….I don't know how I would feel with you behind the wheel…" He says anxiously.

I put my hands on my hips and glare at him. "I'm not disabled, Damon. I can drive."

"I'll just come back then." He differs.

I roll my eyes and nod.

"Bye Helen. Good seeing you. And next appointment is the gender reveal so we can put this he/she thing to rest."

"It's a boy" Damon smirks at us.

"We aren't even going there Salvatore. But see you soon. And bye, Helen. Come back anytime." I tell her genuinely.

"Oh, trust me, honey, I will. You will be getting a lot of dishes." She smiles almost evilly.

"Can't wait." I assure.

Me and my dad close the door.

"She is such a nice woman." My dad shakes his head.

"She is." I smile before heading up to my room to get changed.

I have a whole bunch of maternity dresses I bought the past couple of months but never wore them. I think, I have been in denial, about my weight and getting bigger, but it is at that point, where it's impossible to be in denial now. I shrug on a floral dress that goes to my knees. By the time I am done with my bathroom things, I hear a knock. I smile and go as fast as I can to open the door and we both have goofy expressions on our faces. I pull him inside and lead him to the living room. We sit on the couch together and just listen to the silence surrounding us. It's nice. Also, we should definitely treasure it now. We stare at the Christmas tree that now occupies a section of our living room, and we're probably thinking the same thing that next Christmas, is going to be very different. In a good way. But still. A big change.

"What do you want for Christmas?" Damon says out of the blue while we are wedged on the couch together.

I shrug. "I don't need much. Besides, maybe some baby stuff." I add.

"Come on, Elena. There has to be something you need or want? Tell me."

I sigh thinking over what I need or want. "A new laptop? I really need a new one anyway and with school getting harder it would be better if I had it to study." I explain.

He nods.

"Damon." I scold. "Don't get me it. I'll just ask my dad or something."

"Fine, I won't" He says seriously but then winks.

Ugh.

"You're impossible." I try to say and keep a straight face but end up breaking out in a smile.

"Ah, but you love me." He smiles but then coughs.

I look away with a smile, slightly blushing.

I hope he doesn't know how on point he is. I don't know if he will like me that way ever but I don't care because it's the rush I get when he looks at me or touches me, that is worth it. It is all worth it. I am just glad, he's in my life. I love our messed up relationship. We fight a lot and banter but I wouldn't have it another way. It would be boring without it. A lot of people will probably think I forgave him too fast. Especially when I talk to Bonnie or Caroline again. Though talking to Bonnie, might be a tad awkward at first. I think once I worked through my feelings and emotions I figured out I wasn't mad at him. I was sad he wasn't mine. I thought he was mine because of our situation, plus I never told him how I felt, so, I shouldn't have expected much. It was just a big huge freaking misunderstanding. One thing about me and Damon though, is we could fight like cats and dogs, but always survive somehow.

We always survive.

Review for next chapter?

Thanks to Anna for being my BETA even though we hit fanfiction block aka we procrastinated doing this chapter over and over.

And to Irta obvs.

Long wait? Hahahaha lost my muse. I actually wrote most of this chapter about 2 days after i updated last time, it was the end i had writers block on.

Got through it though. Was going to make it longer but i cut a few things to make it flow.

Until next time! Review to muse me up! Xo.