Author's Note: Yeah so turns out my headphone jack is broken beyond repair. I have my laptop back in my possession though. I press Win-E and Windows Explorer opens to the Computer page and I see "DVD RW Drive (D:)" and I double click it and it says, "Please insert a disk into drive D:." and I'm just like, "NO, IT DOESN'T EXIST, PLEASE INSERT THE ACTUAL FUCKING DRIVE D:!" because there's now just this gaping hole in the side of my laptop where the disk drive used to be. *sad*

Also, the end of last chapter was supposed to be the first part of this chapter, but I ran out of things to write, so I figured I'd just knock it in there. The lovely explanation behind the first part of this and the last part of the previous chatper is that I drew out a floorplan for their house for lack of anything better to do one day and I showed it to my friend and she's like, "Lemme see it," so I left it with her during math. End of the period, she hands it back to me with cute little drawings of Sollux and Karkat around the house and the caption, "It was missing it's tenants." If you guys wanna see the floorplan, it's under the Thigns & Sutff link on my tumblr, professor-snap. I'm quite proud of it. There'll be a neater, digital version up later that actually labels everything in a not shitty way, in case you have any trouble deciphering what's what. Which leads perfectly into how this chapter came to be, Megan, in drawing them around the house, misinterpreted the front closet for the shower. I think you can figure out how that corresponds.

Lots of smut lately. Should I continue the trend or actually write some plot? Because I could do either. I suppose this is some form of plot. Kind of. That being said, I'm gonna put a content warning on this chapter because some people do get kind of weird about things like this: BDSM kink, degradation/name-calling kink. Other shit. Yeah. In that regard, I do explain BDSM if you don't know what it is, so don't worry about looking it up.

Chapter Twenty-Three, ladies and gentleman (I can now say gentleman because I had a guy friend read this. Other than him, I sincerely doubt any guys read this. Hence the singular). Also, longest chapter to date. Very pleased about this. Enjoy~

Sollux had gotten progressively more touchy-feely over the next ten minutes, his hands slipping just under my shirt, his mouth pressing more insistently on the back of my neck. I was more than okay with it, but it seemed the lack of tiredness from before had caught up with me and my eyelids were drooping whether I wanted them to or not. Of course, the hand I suddenly felt at my crotch helped them shoot open again. What it didn't do, however, was clear the sleepy fog covering my mind — or find my thought-to-mouth filter for me before I said something stupid.

"How come you won't blow me?"

I only realized I was the one who'd said that after his teeth froze at my neck. Alright. What deranged fucking part of me decided that was a reasonable thing to ask, the alcohol, the exhaustion, or the retardation?

"What." Whelp. I've dug this hole deep enough. What's the difference of a few more feet, right? Fuck me.

"How come you haven't gone down on me?" I repeated, scooting sideways to look at him. "I've sucked you off so many times by now I've lost count, but you haven't given me a blowjob. I'm not asking you to, if you don't want to. I just wanna know why you haven't."

"I. Uh." He swallowed visibly. "'Cauth'e I'm th'upid about thingth', alright?" He didn't sound as defensive as he did dejected as he looked away. That was a pretty shit answer. I supposed I'd tell him as much.

"That was a pretty shit answer."

He turned back and gave me a hard stare. "Fine, then, in cath'e you hadn't notith'ed, KK, I'm not all that good with my mouth. I hardly think I'd be any good th'ucking your cock when I can't th'o much ath' th'peak like a normal perth'on."

I raised an eyebrow and scoffed, settling back against his chest. "You're a fucking moron."

"Would you like me to try?" he asked, his pitch high out of sarcasm and... fear, maybe? Yeah, definitely a touch of that. "'Cauth'e I can if you want me to. But I'll warn you now, I'm gonna feel like shit when you don't come 'cauth'e I'm bad at it." I straightened up and looked at him for a solid thirty seconds before looking away, thinking hard.

Smoothing a hand up his chest as I looked back to him, I curved it around the side of his head and kissed him roughly, the pressure I only just noticed in my boxers deciding for me. Stretching my hand up a little more, I gripped his hair and kissed a tiny line to his ear, murmuring, "I'll help you. If you even need it."

"That'th' gonna do wonderth' for my th'elf-eth'teem," he pointed out dryly.

"I didn't know how to suck dick before I blew you. It's not like I'd ever done it before. I mean, it's not that fucking hard, either, you literally just suck dick." His expression didn't change. I sighed and added, "Think about it this way: would you rather sit here, knowing your boyfriend's horny and not satisfied when there's something you could have done about it and didn't, or would you rather try with a little guidance and know that you caused the sweaty, jizz-covered mess leaning against the wall afterward?" The groan that came out of his throat let me know that my words had done the trick.

I pushed myself to my feet and helped Sollux to his knees, stepping around him once he was steady and knocking my elbows lightly against the wall behind me. He glanced up dubiously and carefully hooked the waistline on my underwear. I shot him a smirk as my half-hard length presented itself just above the cotton. He dragged them down to my knees before tentatively gripping my cock, stroking it slowly and moving his head sideways to get a different view. He looked up at me again and I threatened coldly, the tiniest hint of teasing pervading my tone, "I swear to God, if we find out you're really fucking great at this and you've been depriving me this whole time—"

My words were lost in a groan when the wet heat of his mouth covered me. I shut my eyes tight and pressed my shoulders to the plaster, finding the back of his head with a hand and letting it rest there as he began to move around me. "Fuck." I swallowed and leaned forward, my stomach tightening. "Oh, God." Within a minute, I'd been reduced to a panting jumble of nerves, pleasure shooting up through my gut as his tongue swirled the head. He didn't take me very deep, rather focusing on the what he immediately could. The disconnect at lack of attention to everything else was disconcerting, to say the least, and I attempted to nudge him in the right direction with a tug and a gentle push to the back of his skull.

He picked up the idea quick, pushing his head further and following his mouth with his hand when it slid back. I was nothing but hoarse curses and helpless whimpers, broken phrases begging for him to keep going and disjointed words that made even less sense out loud than they did in my head. I forced my eyes open to admire him — knees indenting the shitty carpet, one hand on my dick, the other on his own, lips sliding over me, back and forth, over and over and over, he'd never looked as good to me as he did in that moment. The sight alone was enough to send a shudder of a feeling I'd learned to associate with him alone straight to my groin, and before I could even warn him, I was coming into the back of his throat, on his lips as he pulled his head away. Strings of off-white hung haphazardly from his mouth to the tip of my cock, disappearing as he stuck his tongue out to lap at them.

The instant I saw that, my legs decided they'd done their work and I found myself sliding down the wall, coming to rest finally with Sollux framed between my knees, my boxers having slipped to my ankles at some point. I panted heavily, trying to catch my breath, and watching listlessly as he licked at something shimmery on his hand. The realization of what it was sent another groan straight through me, and I turned my head away in disbelief. He didn't hesitate to settle between my legs, leaning lightly against my chest. I glared at him.

"Fuck you, I fuckin' hate you. Asshole," I told him harshly, resting my head on his shoulder.

He looked at me with alarm and genuine concern in his gaze. "Fuck. Th'ee, I knew I'd—"

"You could have fucking been doing that this whole goddamn time. I hate you." With that, I buried my face in the crook of his neck, pressing a single, gentle kiss to the back of his shoulder.

He didn't speak again. Remembering vaguely that he had, at some point, began to attend to himself, I peeked up from behind him and saw that he was still straining against the fabric of his boxers. Returning my head to his shoulder, I kissed his shoulder blade again, hoping to distract him as I worked my hand into his pants. Fisting his length, I dealt with him quickly, soaking up each moan like audible candy.

"Come here, KK." Sollux's command greeted me as I exited the bedroom the next day.

"What's this about?" I asked, walking toward him on the couch. That tone of voice generally meant he had some sexual question on his mind. Figured I may as well be certain, though. "Is this some sex thing?"

He looked at me with a raised eyebrow over his shoulder, closing his laptop partway as I climbed over the back of the couch and crossed my legs, facing him. A single cushion lay forlorn between us.

"Yeah." He answered rather tentatively.

"Alright. I'm fucking sick of being awkward about this shit, I've already fucked you, what do I care? What's up?"

He looked both stunned and amused for a moment before glancing at his laptop. Turning back to me, he asked quietly, "What do you know about BDEth'M?"

I almost couldn't hide the grin threatening to overtake my expression. If he was going with this where I thought he was, I would be very pleased. Outwardly, however, I was curious where he'd take it left to his own devices. "I don't know what that is."

He sighed softly. "Figureth'."

"But I'm guessing you do. So. Educate me."

He blinked at me. "Um. Okay. BDEth'M is a kink comprith'ed of three partth'. The firth't part, the B and D bit, th'tandth' for bondage and dith'ipline, the former of which obviouth'ly involveth' reth'traintth', gagth' and blindfoldth', handcuffth' and whatnot, the like. Dith'ipline, however, dealth' moth'tly with, almoth't what you did yeth'terday, rewardth' and punishmentth'.

"The th'econd part, the DEth', ith' dominanth'e and th'ubmission. Bath'ic enough, I think you can figure that one out. Mikth'ed with other kinkth', thith' can prove rather... volatile," he stated uncertainly, seemingly picking his words with the utmost care. He needn't have bothered, considering I'd stopped listening at some point and settled for merely watching him talk. Fantasizing about where else those lips could be at that moment was proving much easier after the previous night.

"The lath't part, Eth'M, ith' th'adomath'ochith'm. Thith' one ith' th'entered moth'tly around pain, and I'm not entirely sure how I feel about that ath'pect, though it doeth' alth'o deal with humiliation, which I'm admittedly far more okay with. Ropeburn doeth'n't neth'eth'arily th'ound all that bad, either." He looked at me expectantly, waiting for a reaction I wouldn't give. I was still lost somewhere in the closet. "You are not even lith'tening to me, are you. I bet if I keep talking in an informative tone of voith'e, you're juth't gonna th'tare at me and pretend to lith'ten to me. Ith' that right?"

"Mm-hmm."

He chuckled. "You're th'uch a prick." With that, he opened his computer back up and continued whatever he was doing.

When I finally noticed he'd stopped talking, I shook my head quickly, mentally kicking myself for not paying enough attention. "Wait, what?"

"Oh, you didn't mith' much, I juth't explained the whole thing and you're gonna have to reth'earch anything you didn't catch yourth'elf becauth'e I'm not repeating it, fuckhole." After a short burst of laughter, I smirked and scooted closer to him.

"I know what BDSM is, idiot. I just wanted to hear you talk about it."

"You weren't doing much lith'tening," he pointed out, sneering at his computer for half a second.

"Not attentively. Just for something in the background. Your voice is soothing."

His incredulous glare whipped around to meet my smirk. Staring for a moment, he muttered, "I fucking hate you," before turning back to his screen, hiding his hint of a grin. I beamed back and snuggled up against his shoulder, watching him play Alchemy on Yahoo! Games.

Eventually, I stretched up a bit and whispered, "Y'know, if we do get into this BDSM shit, I'm obviously going to be your dom."

"Th'ayth' who?" he asked indignantly.

"You already bend to my will, it goes without saying."

"Humph. Not true."

"Tell me, Sollux, exactly which parts of BDSM are you interested in?" I slid my hand down his arm as I spoke, locking my fingers around his wrist when I continued. "Is it the bondage? Do you want me to tie you to the bed and watch you squirm when I don't give you the attention you're begging for?" The only response he seemed capable of managing while his eyes widened was a whimper, his game immediately forgotten. "Or maybe you like sub/dom play better. You're definitely submissive enough as is." I punctuated the statement with a biting kiss on his neck, drawing out another pathetic whimper preceded only by his shocked gasp.

"Is it the punishments you're so eager to receive? I'd love to have some way to keep my bad boy in line, you know." His cheeks got, if at all possible, even more red. That's when it clicked for me. "Oh, I get it," I murmured slowly. "You wanna be humiliated, don't you? You wanna be put down and mocked and seen for the pathetic bitch you are, is that right? I wouldn't be surprised if you were getting off on just the sheer embarrassment of these questions. Is that right?" He could barely choke out a stuttered "fuck" before I had his laptop moved to the coffee table and my knees on either side of his, straddling his thighs.

"I'm curious, so, tell me: what were you doing yesterday, Sollux? When I walked in and you instantly hid your computer like you had a secret to keep. What was that, hm?"

He looked away abashedly, pitch too high and reply too quick when he said, "N-Nothing."

I smiled and narrowed my eyes, bringing my hand up from where the nails had been skritching little shapes into the side of his stomach to cup his cheek. He caught himself just in time to keep from leaning into my palm. "Oh, Sollux, you're not disobeying me already, are you?" I asked softly, stroking his cheek with my thumb. "Tsk. I'd hate to have to punish you this early." I dug my nails into his neck as I touched the tip of my nose to his and a harsh gasp tore from his throat just as his frantic hands found my shoulders, pushing me away.

"Shit, KK, th'top." His tone was high and panicky, and I was instantly afraid I'd gone too far. I immediately leaned back, waiting for him to collect his thoughts and attentively watching him for a more obvious sign that I'd fucked up. He eventually formed a clear sentence, muttering in a reserved manner, "KK, if we're gonna... do... any of thith', like, at all, we have to have a th'afeword."

I looked at him curiously for a moment, the thought having not even crossed my mind until he mentioned it. "A safeword," I repeated, tone neutral. "Okay. Did you have one in mind?"

"Kind of. It obviouth'ly hath' to be th'omething we wouldn't normally th'ay, but th'omething we'll be able to remember."

"I like how you're making it seem like I'll ever be using it."

"You might!" he offered meekly.

I rolled my eyes at him. "Yeah, likely."

"Shut up. Anyway, I wath' thinking—"

"I also like how you having already thought of this means you've had this on your mind for a while."

"KK!" he whined. I grinned at him, shrugging as I finally humored him and settling for bracing my hands on his thighs. "Th'o. I wath' thinking, unleth' you'd rather uth'e th'omething th'imple like red for th'top and yellow for th'low down, we could uth'e our zodiac th'ignth'."

I cocked my head at him. "Why?"

"I'unno. I figured, hey, we both know 'em, we're not gonna forget 'em any time th'oon, th'o why not? And in my opinion, it'th' better than th'ome generic th'toplight color shit and leth' likely to come up in normal converth'ation."

I chuckled softly. "Alright, but I don't see what about any conversation we're having involving a safeword is gonna be normal." His face brightened slightly. I grinned. "I do like the stop or slow down idea, though. Why don't we make Gemini the slow down and Cancer the stop?"

"Workth' for me." I smirked, glad that we were able to so easily deal with that.

"Now, on the other hand, I believe I've left you with a little... problem," I murmured, grinding my lap into his.

"Nnnnnngh. KK."

"Ah-ah." I dug my fingers into his scalp and turned his head so that my lips were right at his ear. "You are to address me as Karkat only. Understood?"

"Y-Yeth', Karkat."

A shudder ran up my spine. "Good boy." Something similar ran up his. I licked a long stripe up his neck, one hand toying with his hair and the other finding creative new ways to maneuver under into his pants. The poor angle of my hand and light brushes of my fingers were driving him more wild than the mind games we were playing, and those were driving him crazy enough as it was. The noises he made were, in a way, different than anything I'd heard before, and it tripped me out to think every time I got him moaning was better than the previous somehow. I'm sure that was the last thing on his mind, however, when I finally got fed up with the restraints of denim and practically tore apart the zipper.

His moans got sharper, and I almost continued out of sheer habit when he groaned out my nickname — then I remembered my earlier command.

My hand immediately found its way back to open air, coming to rest on my own thigh. He whimpered at the loss of attention, finally opening his eyes when I didn't concentrate it anywhere else. "KK?" he questioned softly, panting. I hardened my glare as much as I could, burgundy eyes meeting red and blue.

"Did I say you could call me KK?" His eyes widened in realization of what he'd done wrong.

"No, but—"

"Then why did you?"

"I-I... um. I, uh—"

"You what?"

"I don't know," he whispered, looking down.

"You don't know," I chided. "Hm." I began to climb off of him, paying no mind to his protests. "I think I'll leave you alone for a while to figure out exactly why you did."Walking towards the room without the slightest trace of regret, I added, "I might be willing to listen to an apology in, oh, I don't know, half an hour? We'll see."

He leapt off the couch, chasing after me without hesitation. "Wait, KK — K-Karkat, wait, you can't juth't—"

"Oh, but Sollux, I can. One more thing, you're not allowed to finish yourself off. You wouldn't want an even harsher punishment, would you?" With that, I turned into the room and shut the door after me, relishing in his forlorn whine from the other side of it. He had his laptop. He'd be fine for now.

Unfortunately for me, in intentionally leaving him with a problem, it appeared I had left myself with one as well, but unlike my flustered boyfriend in the room over, I didn't have anything against resolving my own issue, and quickly settled on our bed to do so, pausing beforehand to lock the door, so as not to be walked in on. Not that it wasn't anything he hadn't seen before, but I had a feeling I'd be just guilty enough to, if he caught me doing exactly what I told him not to, give in to him, and I wasn't about to give in on the first try.

Mere minutes later, I was panting half-against the pillow, slow, heavy breaths mixed with soft whimpers I hoped he couldn't hear. Eventually, I caught my breath and left the room, praying my face wasn't too flushed. Pouring myself a glass of water, I heard footsteps behind me. Turning towards them, I found Sollux with an already embarrassed blush on his cheeks, his head down, and his hands locked together — covering a rather noticeable bulge in the crotch of his jeans.

"May I apologize now?" I smirked and pretended to consider it before nodding. "I-I'm th'orry for dith'obeying you."

I took a sip of my water. "Are you really?"

"Yeth', I really am, K—" He cut himself off. "Karkat."

"I don't know if I believe you, Sollux."

"Karkat, pleath'e, I-I mean it!"

"Are you going to make it up to me?" I asked, taking another drink.

"Yeth', o-of courth'e—"

"How?"

"I... I-I don't know. Any way you'd like me to."

"Good answer," I said smugly, walking around him towards the couch.

He followed a few feet behind me, taking my hand when I offered it and kissing me back as soon as our lips touched. I pulled him down on top of me, into the position I had been over him nearly ten minutes before. I supposed, in a way, I had given in, having released him from his punishment sooner than I'd said I would, but I figured, as long as he was in this mood, I could do whatever I wated to him. An idea popped into my head just as I found the fly on his jeans again, pulling it apart and filling my hands with him. He groaned and let his head fall into the crook of my neck as I palmed him through his underwear.

My smirk widened when I stopped to move him onto the couch, resulting in a pathetic whimper until I slid both jeans and boxers down just enough that his cock hung comfortably out. I wrapped a hand around it, slowly stroking from base to tip before dragging my mouth down to meet it. Kissing along the shaft, I grinned and licked underneath the length of it, closing my lips over the head as soon as they met it. He pressed his head against the arm of the couch, whining when I swirled my tongue around the cock in my mouth.

I worked him down torturously slowly, cupping his balls in one hand and stroking his cock wherever my mouth didn't reach yet. It wasn't long until his knees were shaking, and right when I knew he was close, I pulled away completely, sitting back and watching him writhe uncomfortably. "Karkat," he simpered.

I crawled over him, moving until I sat low on his stomach. Leaning forward, I pressed my lips into his neck and dragged my nails up his side, skimming over his chest while I mumbled, "You're pathetic." His back arched at just my words, and I knew I'd really hit the jackpot with this whole humiliation thing. Biting down quickly, I sat back up and scooted towards his feet, settling on his thighs.

Gripping his painfully hard dick, I fisted the shaft slowly and looked at him straight on. "Don't break eye contact." His eyes unfocused briefly before meeting mine, and he nodded. "Good. What were you doing on the computer yesterday?" He looked vaguely distraught, and far more concerned with my hand than my question. He groaned, both in pleasure and apprehension of answering, and turned his eyebrows up in the most hopeless expression of hope I'd ever seen. I ignored it and stilled my hand. He whined again and I repeated the question, resuming my motions even slower. He whimpered and tried to buck into my fist, closing his eyes. I jerked roughly upward, resulting in a gasp as his eyes shot open. "Don't break eye contact," I repeated, harsher. "Strike one."

He eventually forced his gaze to return to mine. My name came out through gritted teeth when my hand began to work him over again. "Are you going to answer the question?" I asked slowly, smirking as another blush rose in his cheeks.

"Yeth'."

"Then answer: what were you doing on the computer?"

"I wath'... reth'earching." His cheeks burned even brighter, and the instant I rewarded him with a faster stroke, he tore his eyes away from me. Frowning, I pulled my hand away, which brought forth a pitiful sob. "Karkat, pleath'e!"

"Strike two," I ground out, reaching up to grab a fistful of hair. Giving him an empty smile, I warned, my tone sickly sweet, "One more and you're gonna be left here all alone."

He shivered and whispered, "Okay. Th'orry."

"Don't apologize to me. The only one who'll suffer will be you, love." His lips quirked down in a miniscule frown before falling open as I returned my fingers to his dick. "So then. What were you 'researching'?"

"Harneth'eth'." He gasped when I offered his reward.

"Anything else?"

"Ropeth'." Whine. "H-Handcuffth' a—" Gasp. "—a-and th'preaderth'!" The shudder in his moan should have been illegal.

"That it?" I prompted, my voice wavering a bit.

"Gagth'," he answered hurriedly. "That'th' it." His voice was scarcely more than a breathy murmur by now, me fully devoted in my effort to finish him off. My name came high and broken in his throat just as he came.

"Good boy," I whispered in his ear, stroking him through his orgasm. "Very good boy, Sollux." He whimpered. "God, you're gorgeous. You know, I think we should keep the curtains in this room closed. Give you more opportunities to show me what I want." He nodded, finally allowed to close his eyes and doing just that. I pushed his right leg against his left and lay down next to him on the edge of the couch. He pulled his right arm into his chest and curled against me, burrowing his face into my neck.

For a while, it was nothing but heady pants on my collarbone and gentle, calming scratches on Sollux's back through his shirt. I thought I caught a few "I love you so much"s here and there, though I couldn't be certain. He clung to me until the sun began to set, hours upon hours of him keeping me within grasp and sliding in and out of consciousness. I almost felt guilty for having put him through something so taxing, but I soon remembered the look in his eyes when I punished him, when I commanded and reprimanded him, insulted him, and any regret vanished.

Around ten, he finally woke up enough to make coherent conversation, or at the very least, to move to the bed. My stomach grumbled unhappily as I passed the kitchen, but I silently told it to shut up and ignored the hunger. I quickly decided I wouldn't mind all that much going to bed hungry, but oh my needs were severely unfulfilled. A shower was in desperate order, food next on the list, and lastly, use of the bathroom, which, unlike eating, could not wait.

Returning to the bedroom, I found Sollux already under the covers, eyes shut and seemingly asleep. I wondered if he'd even remember walking here himself until he opened his mouth and said, "Come to bed, KK." I smirked and climbed in next to him. He wrapped an arm around my waist and muttered, his lips on the back of my neck, "Remind me to do that again."

"Do what?" I replied, tired mind drawing a blank.

"Today." Oh.

"Yeah, okay."

"That wath' really great."

"Was it now?" I asked smugly, a smile forming on my lips.

"Mmm. You're fucking incredible."

"Go to bed."

"I love you."

"Love you, too, asshole." He chuckled and relaxed against me, slipping easily back into sleep. It wasn't long until I followed.

Jesus fuck that was great to write. Nowhere near as difficult as twenty-one and, in my personal opinion, just as, if not more, enjoyable. Twenty-one was honest and slow and sweet and as perfect as they could make it, and this was raw and hot and dirty and goddamn. If you don't understand any of what I wrote in this chapter, I suggest you ask me rather than Google it. Bad things happen when you Google this (though I honestly doubt and of you would mind, considering you're reading this). Also I enjoy explaining things. ^-^

Speaking of explaining things, somebody asked what Sollux said the SM stood for because his lisp was fucking things up. If you don't know/can't read it, it stands for sadomasochism, a word compounded from sadism and masochism. The former, sadism, is used in regards to someone who enjoys bringing pain or humiliation to another. Masochism's the other side of this coin, the enjoyment of verbal or physical abuse — more often than not, within a reasonable sense, but I've seen some unbelievably sketchy BDSM scenes, so I can say with a fair certainty that that's not always the case. A good Dom, which, of course, Karkat is, will, whilst enjoying the scene, always pay the utmost attention for their safeword(s).

Review, sweethearts!