SOY: update :3 please enjoy!

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Rating: Mature for themes and later content.

Warnings: none.

Disclaimer: I don't own HomeStuck.

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Higher than Hope

Chapter 02

The next time Dave woke up, he felt a bit better.

Not much time had passed, in reality –it felt around a couple hours, his inner clock said– but his body didn't feel like lead anymore.

Not tired enough to go back to sleep, Dave returned to his new routine of moving every part of his body to see if they were still there, and once satisfied with that, he moved to the next problem, one he could access without moving.

Trying to see if it was day or night outside the dimly lit room, Dave took a deep breath and concentrated on his inner clock, expanding his awareness enough that he could feel the power of time unravel under his fingers.

It was pleasing to know he still had some remains from the game, though puzzling –weren't they supposed to return to normalcy after winning?

This train of thoughts was abandoned when he felt a dissonance in the beat of time, enough to make him cringe and to disrupt his concentration. Time slipped from his fingers and returned to its slumbering feeling from before, leaving him shivering.

He had trained himself to reach for it even under strain, because during the fight with LE he'd had to be as fast as he could, but this difference was unexpected.

Time ticked into the back of his head, and Dave latched to it again, this time approaching it slowly, paying attention to the familiar, musical beat.

There was a discordance between the time ticking in his head and the one he'd been used to until then –small, fractions of seconds piling up, but it was there, and it was enough to make Dave's head hurt.

Not knowing how to interpret that, Dave released his grip on time and relaxed, trying to focus on something else, opening his eyes to look at the room he was in.

The troll called Rufioh was still gone, or at least hadn't returned to his room yet, and he was sure the other troll wouldn't want to come in if he knew Dave was awake, so for the present time, he was alone with his thoughts.

Concentrating on things was hard, and his thoughts easily scattered around, his brain as lethargic as his body, and Dave idly wondered if it was because of the blood loss that he couldn't string a coherent line of thought.

The room was mostly bare; other than the bed he was using, there was just a table on the opposite wall, the small bedside table, now with a cup of water if he ever needed it, and that was it.

The window was covered with something, but the light wasn't enough for him to see what it was; he didn't feel cold, so the heating worked.

Another quick scan of the room told him that there was no heater in there, so it meant the room was heated through some other means; the thought made Dave look up, eyes looking from one side of the ceiling to the other in search of a dangling lamp or a source of light.

There was none.

No lamps anywhere else in the room, either.

Huh. Wasn't that… weird?

The door was more like an opening in the wall, with one of those curtains of bamboo sticks acting as a barrier between the room and the world outside, and Dave sighed, relaxing on the bed again.

There was nothing else to do but he wasn't tired, so instead of giving in to boredom and falling asleep again, Dave closed his eyes and concentrated on counting time.

He started mentally piling up seconds, one after the other. It was a relaxing, monotonous task, but even then he kept messing up, the way time ticked different from what Dave's perception of seconds was.

One, two, three… four five, six, seven… eight…

It kept messing up, and Dave quickly grew annoyed at himself. Wasn't he supposed to be the Time Hero? Why then…

The bamboo curtain rustled softly as someone peeked into the room, and Dave froze, concentration disrupted as he stilled on the bed. He hadn't heard the sound of footsteps, too busy focusing on time.

Someone entered the room.

Eyes fluttering open again, Dave peered at the newcomer.

And stared.

It was another troll, as he'd thought, but different from Rufioh.

The angle didn't allow Dave to check if he was tall or not, but his horns were smaller and wave-shaped, placed on top of his head and poking out from perfectly slicked black hair. There was a streak of a lighter colour in the middle, but with the current light he couldn't say which colour it was –could easily be blue, violet or brown.

Also, and Dave blinked in surprise when he noticed, instead of normal, pointed ears like all the other trolls he'd met before, this one had fins sprouting from the sides of his face. As Dave was observing them, they fluttered slightly.

Huh. Curious.

The troll was wearing the usual black shirt with a symbol on it, two wavy lines one on top of the other. It looked a bit like a stylization of the sea, or something.

When the unknown troll turned fully towards him, Dave closed his eyes again, not wanting him to realise he was awake; he had a feeling that the troll would leave again if he did, and Dave was actually grateful for the impromptu visit breaking the monotony of his counting time.

He felt the troll shuffle closer, and the hair of his arms stood up, part of him feeling extremely vulnerable and wanting to move and protect himself, even though he knew there was nothing to worry about.

Instincts were hard to overcome.

Still, he managed not to move.

For a few long seconds –one, two, three… dissonance, four– nothing moved. This close, Dave could hear the troll breathing, deep and controlled. Neither moved, and he wondered what the troll was looking at.

Then something cool touched his forehead, and Dave was startled out of his self-imposed immobility, his eyes snapping open instantly as he tensed.

"Fuck–" the troll's hand darted away from his forehead as if burned, and Dave felt him move away from the bed, as if expecting him to attack.

Dave didn't care much about that, because he was too busy fending off a wave of dizziness, groaning and digging his hands into the bed in a vain attempt to keep the world from spinning.

"Shit, you ok?"

The troll stepped forwards, hovering above him but not daring to touch him again, and Dave exhaled slowly, gritting his teeth.

"N-not sure," he replied honestly. "You… surprised me".

"No shit, you surprised me too! Wweren't you sleepin'?" the defensive tone would have been amusing if Dave had been feeling well enough for that.

"Nope," he replied.

After another tense inhale, Dave relaxed again, and opened his eyes to get a closer look at the troll. The guy was wearing thick, black-rimmed glasses, and his mouth was set in a small, pouty grimace.

"You shouldn't be awwake," the troll continued, almost as if Dave had done him great offense by not being sleeping. "You need ta rest".

"Can't sleep all the fucking time, man," he replied, casting a casual glance towards the water cup and wondering if he could get to that without feeling dizzy again. He swallowed.

The troll caught the glance and hesitated, then moved to the other side of the bed, grabbed the cup roughly and shoved it in front of Dave's face.

"Here, havve at it," he stated.

Dave's eyes flicked from his face to the cup, then grabbed it with a vaguely unsteady hand and twisted his neck up, sipping the liquid. He was grateful he could do that on his own, because getting babied wasn't cool by any stretch of imagination.

"Thanks," he said when he felt the thirst subside.

The troll stole the cup again and put it back on the table, looking a bit uncomfortable.

"No biggie," was the muttered reply. "Need anythin' else?"

Dave thought about it, then shook his head. "Nah, chill as I could be," he stated.

"Chill as anyone could be wwith havvin' a ten-inches wwound in your side," the troll grunted, moving once again on the other side of the bed, leaning forwards to inspect the bandages. "Don't you fuckin dare ta mess up my wwork," he added.

It felt more like a whine than a threat, and Dave had no intention to reopen his wound anyway, so he shrugged.

"Who are you?" he asked.

The troll froze and glared down at him, then his eyes flicked from one side of the room to the other, as if considering whether to run or not. After a few seconds, his shoulders dropped in defeat.

"Eridan," he replied. "The fuckin' troll wwho savved your alien ass".

"I thought… that was Rufioh," Dave frowned and looked at the door, then back at the troll… Eridan.

"I found you," Eridan looked a mix of proud and annoyed, for reasons Dave couldn't understand. He didn't even want to try. "An' I stitched you up".

Dave glanced down at his bandaged side, and shivered; he was glad he hadn't been awake for that, the only time Bro had cut him up deep enough to need the stitched had been a painful moment, indeed.

"Uh. Thank you, then," he swallowed, fingers tapping on the bed's surface as a way to dispel the awkward feeling.

Something passed on the troll's face, but Dave couldn't read it, so he let it go.

"Yeah, wwhatevver," he mumbled, turning around to leave, then stopping and moving back to look at him.

Dave was amused by the way the troll was standing, his back straight and muscles stiff, and part of that amusement was probably visible because Eridan hunched forwards a bit and looked away.

Hmm, the guy was weird.

"Uh, Rufioh's gone ta get somethin to eat," he scratched his chin absently, and Dave hummed. "Just don't movve around," he said.

He hesitated again, and Dave looked up at him, waiting. When the troll didn't speak, choosing to look around the room instead, he sighed.

"Hey, I'm not going to break if you want to ask something, ok?" his words startled Eridan out of his trance, and the troll's eyes zoomed on him. "I promise I don't bite," he added, referencing Rufioh's words from before.

Eridan stiffened, eyeing him suspiciously. "You wwon, right," he grunted out after another couple seconds of silence.

"Yeah," Dave nodded. "Didn't the others tell you already?"

Eridan's stiff posture seemed to become even stiffer, and Dave frowned. "What," he asked, wishing he could stand.

He swallowed, his mouth dry again, and turned his attention to the water again, reaching out slowly to grab the cup and drink from it.

"There are no others".

It was just a mumble, but it made Dave freeze.

His fingers tightened around the cup, and some of the water sloshed out, dripping on his hand and down on the bed; to avoid wasting more water, Dave cautiously placed down the cup again, and turned his eyes to Eridan.

"What," he asked again, his voice monotone out of shock.

"Nobody's here," there was a challenging look in Eridan's eyes, and Dave felt a sudden vertigo, followed by a cold sensation growing inside his stomach. "Just you, me an' Ruf".

Licking his lips, Dave clenched his hands into fists to hide the trembling.

"Where… where are the others?" Dave's eyes fluttered around the room and its bareness, then back to the troll, searching for an hint that would explain what was going on. "What do you mean there's just us?"

Eridan shrugged evasively. "Wwe'vve been here for round a perigee, n' you wwere the only one wwe'vve seen".

The cold sensation spread through him, and Dave instantly closed his eyes, fending off the abrupt wave of panic and blocking it under control. Then, he opened his eyes again, pinning Eridan with a glare.

"What is this place?" he asked, urgent. "Aren't we in the new universe?"

Eridan had backed away slightly under Dave's glare, but he seemed to gain confidence again and nodded. "Yes," he replied simply. "Wwe are".

"Then why–"

"Don't ask, I havve no idea, nor does Ruf," Eridan brushed one hand through his hair, chewing on his lower lip. "You should rest, ain't goin ta get any better if you fret, wwon't make em pop up at your call".

Of course, Dave knew that –his side was hurting already because his muscles were all tense, but he couldn't just relax. Of all the things he'd expected when waking up, finding out he was alone with no idea where his friends were was not one of them.

"Where are we?" he asked, his tone urgent, demanding.

Eridan glared at him, and shrugged. "Somewwhere on the planet, in a forest or somethin', not sure. Ruf built this place before I wwas evven around".

The cold was spreading quickly, and Dave swallowed again, staring at the troll with wide eyes. "You… where did you appear?"

"Ah, don't mistake me, I popped 'round here, just not together wwith Ruf," Eridan explained, his tone a bit impatient. "Maybe a couple wweeks ago, found the hivve here and decided ta stay".

Fuck.

"Wwe wweren't expectin' ta find someone because Ruf searched a lot wwithout findin' no one before I got here, an' wwhen wwe found you, you wwere also hurt," the troll continued, apparently not noticing Dave paling.

Fuck.

Holy shitty burning fuck.

Fingers gripping the edge of the bed tightly, Dave gritted his teeth and tried to hoist himself up into a sitting position. Pain flared up instantly as he moved, and Eridan let out a distressed sound, trying to get closer. Dave glared at him, pupils wide and an intense, angered expression, and it made the troll back away with a weird throat chirrup.

Panting and wheezing, Dave managed to shift up enough that he could slip one hand under his side and help himself, but the pain ripping from his side made him see white, and he almost crumpled back down, tears of exertion filling his eyes.

Fuck.

"Wwhat the actual fuck!" Eridan, recovered from the glare, moved to his side and pushed his shoulders, making a weird clicking sound, and Dave went down instantly, not enough energy to fight back.

He gasped and flailed a bit, nails digging into something soft, and held onto it as the pain burned through him, making it hard to focus on anything except his heart racing in his chest, every beat bringing a new twinge.

Slowly, painstakingly slow, the pain dulled again, though this time it didn't go away, and Dave slumped fully on the bed. His ears stopped ringing, and sounds started pouring in again; the first was a low, pathetic noise that sounded like someone whining, and belatedly Dave realised that he was the one making that noise.

With a gasp, he clamped his lips shut and breathed loudly through his nose, nostrils flaring and eyes wide.

Fuck.

Goddamn it.

"Hey, you ok?" a blurred face appeared in Dave's drastically reduced sight, and he swallowed down bile as he shook his head. "Of course you're not ok, fuck, wwhat the hell got into you?"

Dave slowly relaxed, his fingers growing lax, and he felt Eridan move away, letting go of his shoulders.

He was still having a hard time breathing, panic gnawing at his insides, brain trying to think about what went wrong, but slipping through thoughts without being able to stick to one.

"Open that fuckin' mouth and breathe," the troll ordered, and Dave swallowed, realising his lips were still pressed shut.

He parted his lips and sucked air in, drawing quick, shuddery gasps.

He had no idea where everybody else was except two trolls he didn't even know, and had no idea if Jade and Karkat had even made it through… no, obviously they were safe, Bec Noir had returned to his original form before Dave had fallen through, so…

Why were they not together in the same place? What had happened? Did they screw up on the new universe? They weren't even sure what kind of world they had created in the first place, what the Game had seen fit to give them.

What if everybody was safely together except for Dave?

What if they were in danger, though?

Unable to stand still anymore, forgetting about his wound, Dave tried to move, and again Eridan pushed him down, fiercely.

Dave let out a pained grunt.

"I can't stay here," he said, and his voice was more of a whine than a statement. "What if they need me?"

"Yes, because you wwould be so helpful right noww," Eridan scoffed, poking his bandages a few inches above the wound, lifting one eyebrow when Dave let out a soft whimper. "There are things out there that wwould eat ya, an' I wwon't let you wwaste all my wwork because you're a suicidal alien ass".

Dave was still shivering, panting and frantic, but he didn't try moving anymore.

This time, when the troll touched his forehead, he didn't even flinch. Eridan's fingers were clammy, but cool, and sort of good against his skin.

"Wwhat's your normal temperature?" Eridan asked.

Dave mumbled a reply, and Eridan hissed, his fins fluttering again. "I havve no idea wwhat that means," he scoffed. "But you might be fevverish, so don't movve till I come back, did ya hear me?"

Dave grunted and nodded, abandoned against the mattress, and Eridan turned around and strutted out of the room. Dave watched him go with hazy eyes, and then he was alone again.

Silence enveloped him all of sudden, and with it, all of his thoughts crashing through him.

This was not how it was supposed to go.

He was alone in the new universe, with no idea where the others were, and the more he thought about it, the more he felt like there was a gaping hole in his chest, growing and eating him alive.

Where was Karkat? John? Rose?

Were they ok?

Dave's hand slowly curled into a fist around the thin mattress, clenching it until his knuckles turned white.

The new world was probably as big as old Earth, maybe more, and if they were all scattered around, how long would it take to find each other again?

How long would he have to stay still and recover before being able to walk again and go find them?

It was getting hard to breathe, so Dave opened his mouth wide and forced himself to take deep, shuddery gasps, his heart thrumming in his temples.

He felt sick. His eyes were burning and his side hurt, and he was having a hard time calming down. The tips of his fingers tingled and ached, and he had to stop himself from making more embarrassing, pathetic sounds.

What if he hadn't appeared close to Rufioh and Eridan's makeshift house? Would he have died? Could he even die and be reborn in this universe, or did he get his powers but not the other perks of being a godtier?

All the thinking was making his brain feel like sludge.

Dave lifted his fist and slammed it down against the bed, but the motion vibrated through his body and his side flared up in pain again; he cursed loudly, biting down on his lip harshly to stop the sounds of pain.

A trail of sweat rolled down his nose, and he could feel it on his back, too, sticky and cool.

He hated this.

He hated the fact that he got hurt, and not even because of LE, but because of Bec fucking Noir. He hated that he'd tumbled into the new universe and got lost, and he hated not knowing anything, and being weak and dependant on those two trolls.

And feeling shitty.

Fuck.

He couldn't even curl up on himself, close his eyes and pretend to be on the meteor again, or even back home, because every time he moved, pain racked through him, reminding him where he really was.

Fuck.

After everything he'd gone through, the feeling of being lost was the worse.

He wanted to see Karkat. He wanted to see Rose, and Jade, and John, and Dirk, and everybody.

Dave blinked, trying to focus on the ceiling, and took a shaky breath, feeling horrid and lonely. He was usually good at holding up under stress, but now he could barely breathe right without crumbling.

He brought one hand to his forehead, testing it. His hand was warm, but his forehead was warmer, and the contact was almost pleasant. And his throat was parched again.

Ah. Shit. The troll –Eridan– was right. He was feverish.

Taking some shallow breaths to calm himself down, Dave tried to steer his thoughts away from his friends; it wouldn't do to let the gloomy mood settle in. He needed to rest and wait for the wound to heal, and then he could go and search for the others.

He had no idea why the two trolls hadn't moved to find more of their groups, but as soon as he was healed enough, he would leave.

He wanted to find everybody, especially Karkat. And then…

Fuck, he'd almost died. Maybe he'd been a coward for not telling him before, though he wasn't even sure they'd get to live past the battle against LE, but now… now if he ever found the troll again, he would definitely tell him.

Shit.

Instinctively he tried to curl up on his side, his body moving on its own, but renounced the moment his side gave a warning throb. He felt sick. Everything was hurting and he missed his friends.

He missed Bro.

The feeling was so sudden Dave was left feeling like he'd been punched in the guts.

He was a fucking Hero of Time. He'd sacrificed his life more than once knowing it would make them win. He'd fought against a green monster of doom. He'd thrown dead alternate selves into lava pits without breaking a sweat…

And now he just felt like crying.

It made him feel like he was a kid again, and the feeling only strengthened his need to see Bro. Childish as it might be, abrupt and unexpected, the need to let him handle things was overwhelming.

Bro always knew how to make him feel better when he was sick. He'd sit by him and awkwardly pat his head, a plate of broth ready for when his stomach settled instead of swords and smuppets, and then there would be amazing stories about meteors and horses that Dave found to be the most awesome shit ever, even if they were clearly too silly to be true.

And afterwards, Dave would fall asleep, with Bro still there, making sure he would be ok… and things were fine.

Bro was dead.

He missed Bro. He missed his life. Even shitty Texas on shitty Earth.

Fuck.

Footsteps echoed in the unknown world outside his room, and though hazy, Dave's mind instantly zeroed on them, listening as Eridan made his way back to him.

Grunting, Dave tried to compose himself, not wanting to make himself more of a fool, forcing his lips into a thin line and making the muscles of his face go lax.

The troll's footsteps were heavy, and when he appeared on the door he was holding a huge bowl carved in wood, filled to the brim with water; as he walked towards the bed, the water sloshed out of the sides and fell on the floor and onto his fingers, but he didn't seem to notice.

"There," Eridan called out, placing the bowl onto the side table and watching Dave with an expectant stare. "Wwell?"

Slightly disorientated, Dave blinked at him. "Well what?" he asked, confused.

Eridan looked at him, then at the bowl, then back at him, and his lips pursed into another pout as he took out something from the bowl, squeezing it then holding it out for Dave to take; it was a rag –a clean one, probably had been a shirt once.

Comprehension flooded him, and Dave grabbed the cloth with a grateful look, pressing it on his own forehead. The contact with the drenched towel made him hiss, but it also felt heavenly against his heated skin, and he relaxed instantly.

"Thanks," he muttered.

With a deep, shuddery breath, he closed his eyes and let the cool towel soothe him.

He didn't have the strength to change the towel if it got warm, but he could enjoy the cool against his forehead for now.

For a while, the only sounds were Dave's own breathing and the soft, even thump of his heart; he distantly wondered if the troll had left, but he didn't care much, aside for the twinge of regret at being left alone when sick.

Things hardly made sense anymore, and the different pace, the forced stillness, dragged a sort of heaviness from him that hadn't been there previously; he felt sluggish and tired, but also felt bad for relaxing, his brain trying to mediate between his intense desire to move and his body's need to rest.

For a while, Dave slipped in and out of consciousness, only aware of the feeling of coolness on his forehead and how the rest of his body felt weirdly hot; a few times his thoughts strayed in weird tangents, morphing into muddled images and flashes of colours, and more than once he wondered idly if he'd have to change the towel soon, but it was still cool.

Clothes rustled close to his ears, and he groaned, but couldn't open his eyes.

As the knowledge that someone was actually replacing the wet towel for him finally wormed its way in his mind, Dave once again succumbed to sleep.

Eridan squirmed, grumbling under his breath, and observed cautiously as the human finally fell into a deeper sleep, his breathing slowing down and losing the shuddery quality.

His eyes flickered to the door, silently grovelling because Rufioh was still gone, then grunted and dunk the damp towel into the bowl again, squeezing out the excessive water before placing it again on Dave's forehead.

Despite his clear annoyance, his motions were careful, as not to wake up the ill human.

Eridan licked his lips, staring down at the knight of time, unsure about what to do, then turned around and stomped out of the room.