TRTSS43: Tales of Ranma Who! – By Ocramed
Disclaimer: R1/2, SM, Trek, DW and other properties belong to their respective owners.
Note: This is a multi-genre story. C&C are welcomed.
Special Note: This story takes place during the events of the Seventh Series of "Doctor Who".
Part 3: "Asylum of the Daleks!"
London, United Kingom: Present Day.
"I'm telling you, you really ought to deal with your…condition," Ranma said, as he and his wife of many…centuries walked into their home—a mansion—in West London. It had formerly served as the makeshift headquarters of the London Branch of Torchwood, until a proper facility was found by Director Dame Yvonne Hartman and their daughter Rose Tyler, who served as a field leader for the organization.
"Look, being 'half-vampire' is not a problem, Ranma," Usagi protested.
"Oh, really? When you fought Lorelei, you nearly consumed her."
"Look, she threatened Rose, remember?"
"I understand that, but appearances are important for a superhero."
"Oh, I'm sorry," Usagi said. "I'm sorry that you married a monster woman."
"No, I married a woman whom I care about."
"Along with other women?"
"That's beside the point, and you know it," Ranma said, as he took Usagi's hand. "I don't like it when you have…internal conflicts brought on by stress."
"I know that, which is why I am asking you to trust me on this," Usagi said. "Believe me, I know how to deal with insanity, since I'm smack in the middle of it."
"Then, am I glad to be here," said a familiar voice.
Ranma and Usagi both turned to see the Doctor standing by the doorway that would lead to the dining room. Since the energy Ranma felt was friendly, he never bothered to get ready to do battle.
"When did you get here?" Usagi asked.
"Oh, about thirty minutes ago," the Doctor said between sips of his drink. "I didn't know you had Klingon coffee."
"You never asked," Ranma said.
"We can get you a bag of our stash, if you want some to take with you," Usagi said.
"I would LOVE that," the Doctor said, as he sets down cup on a nearby foyer table. "Now, who's up for a little trip?"
"Doctor, we did say that we needed to take a break a bit from traveling with you," Ranma said.
"Oh, come on, now," the Doctor said. "That's been, what, six months ago?"
"Ranma, the Doctor does have a point there," Usagi said.
"Maybe," Ranma replied. "Where do you have in mind to go?"
"How about a little surprise?" the Doctor said.
"Doctor?"
"Oh, okay, fine," the Doctor said, as he produces an alien map, as a holographic projection, in front of the couple. "We need to go…here."
"Skaro?" Usagi said. "Then, that means-"
"Okay, did the Daleks do this time?" Ranma said.
"So, you're coming?"
"Doctor, Daleks are one of my top ten adversarial species that has an automatic red flag in my mind," Ranma said. "That means that, as far as I am concerned, the Daleks have to be dealt with immediately, and, if necessary, brutally."
"Wow, I didn't know how you felt about violence," the Doctor said.
"I'm not looking forward to dealing with the Daleks, but I'm not a fool in thinking that the Daleks will be easy to mollify or neutralize."
"Well, then it is a good thing that I stopped by," the Doctor said. "So, are we ready to go?"
"Um, sure, I guess," Ranma said. "I just need to make a few phone calls first, unless we are in a hurry?"
"No, you do what you have to do," the Doctor said. "Meantime, I'll have another cup of this raktagino."
"Ooh, you try this mint blend I am experimenting," Usagi said, as she and the Doctor go into the dining room.
"Fantastic," the Doctor said. "I love to sample new things…"
Ranma could only shake his head, as he makes his phone calls…
A short time later…
"Great, just great," Ranma said, as he paced what appeared to be a white room of some kind, where he, the Doctor, Usagi, and, surprisingly, Amy and Rory were being kept.
"We go to Skaro to facilitate a rescue mission that turns out to be a trap," Ranma said. "You know, I must be slipping or something."
"No, it appears that the Daleks have, as you would say, 'leveled up'," the Doctor said.
"Yeah, I didn't know that the Daleks could have humanoid drones now," Usagi said, as she inputted this information into her personal access data device (or "PADD") via her "Omnipedia" app.
"They must use some sort of nano-tech assemblage system in order to create the various apparatuses and weaponry within the host seamlessly," Rory said. "Think of the possibilities for future medical treatments."
"Sans the marriage, of course," Amy retorted.
"Please, keep your domestic troubles to a minimum, while I think," the Doctor said.
"How did you know that we're getting a divorce?" Rory asked.
"I didn't, until now," the Doctor said. "But we'll deal with THAT later."
"Yes, just like Rory does with everything," Amy said snidely.
"Amy, be quiet," Ranma said. "We got bigger things to concern us about."
"What?" Amy replied. "Why would you say that to me?"
"Especially since she is now available to be 'snog' by you?" Rory said.
"Rory, be quiet," Usagi said. Although she was not married to Amy in this timeline, the Moon Princess did feel defensive when it came to her…
"What?" Rory replied. "Why would YOU say that to me…?"
Just then, the floor seems to rise until the ceiling opens up.
"Oh, dear," Amy said, as she and her companions were surrounded by…Daleks. LOTS of Daleks."
"Well, welcome to the Parliament of Daleks," the Doctor said, as he straightens his tie. "I suppose I need to make myself presentable before sentencing…"
Ranma scans the room, and then turns towards Usagi.
"When I give the word, teleport everyone out of here, while I take out this vessel," Ranma said.
"Ranma, as much as I like the fact that you are willing to perform the 'Final Explosion Technique', I rather have you live long enough to find out why we're here," Usagi said. "And why haven't we been killed yet."
"Exactly," the Doctor said. "So, why ARE we here-?"
Suddenly, music song, called 'Habanera Aria', from the opera 'Carmen' begins to play over the Daleks' loud speaker.
"WHAT IS THAT NOISE?" the Dalek leader, known as "Dalek Prime" said.
"It seems we have a mystery afoot," the Doctor said. "Most curious…"
After being debriefed on the nature of the situation, the Doctor learned two things. One, that the Daleks had a place where they place insane Daleks (called the Asylum of the Daleks), and that they were so fearful of these Daleks that they erected a planetary force-field that could only be dropped from within the planet. Ergo, the Doctor, as the Dalek's predator, would be sent planetside to deactivate the planet's defenses long enough to allow the orbiting Dalek fleet to destroy it in one fell swoop.
Naturally, the Doctor and his companions would be sent down to do the dirty work that the sane Daleks were afraid to do.
And, two, somehow, a starliner managed to crash on the planet, which provided an opportunity to get past the planetary shield's blind spot, thus enabling the Daleks to use a force gravitational beam to exploit the weakness long enough to insert the Doctor and his companions onto the planet. And in order to protect them from the planet's defenses, each person would be outfitted with a Dalek bracelet, something that everyone was highly suspicious of to begin with. Not surprisingly, Rory was the only one to be apprehensive about helping an enemy that might, in the end, turn against him and the others.
"Well, it was nice living as a free man while it lasted," Rory said, which had gotten a glare from Amy.
"Here goes nothing," the Doctor said, as he was the first one to take a step planet side.
"Geronimo!" Amy yelled, as she took the plung.
"Well, at least I don't have to do paper work today," Ranma said, as he made his jump.
"Weeeeee!" Usagi yelled in delight, as she fell to the planet.
"Oh, dear," Rory said, as he looked down at the hole, before being pushed by a Dalek drone. "Yahhhhhh-!"
When Ranma came to, he realized that he was in the middle of a mountainous, icy field.
"Where the hell am I?" Ranma asked.
Just then, a huge, white, wolf-woman pops up out of the snow bank.
"RRROWL!" the she-wolf roared.
Ranma folded his arms.
"Nice try, but I saw the 'moon mark'," Ranma said.
"Aww, shucks," Usagi-inu said, as she hunched over. "Nothing gets by you, Ranma."
"Yeah," Ranma said. "But…why this?"
"I figured that since the Daleks know what I look like, I can disguise myself," Usagi-inu said, as she reverts into her full wolf form.
"Usagi, that's the dumbest thing I've heard-"
"RORY!" yelled Amy from a afar.
"Damn, figures Rory would be the first to get into trouble," Ranma said flatly. He tried to extend his senses, but frowns.
"Ranma?" Usagi-inu asked.
"Something about this planet is interfering with my aura sensing ability," Ranma said. He then turned to his wife.
"Usagi, can you-?"
"Ah, so I DID have a good idea, huh?" Usagi-inu said.
"Don't get cocky. Just use your nose of yours to find the others."
"I'm on it," Usagi-inu said, as she begins to sniff the air…
"This way!" Usagi-inu said, as she immediately charged forward, with Ranma close behind…
BAM!
BAM!
"I'm trying to concentrate in here!" Ranma yelled through the hatchway. He then turned towards the Doctor, who was trying to formulate a plan with "Soufflé Girl".
"Okay, here's the recap," Ranma said. "We thought we found one of the survivors, a possible friend of Soufflé Girl, who turned out to be a Dalek drone. And now, all of his dead friends are up and about, as Dalek drones. And, in the ensuing scuffle, Amy lost her Dalek wristband."
"Which means that Amy might turn into a Dalek drone, thanks to the nano-probes Rory mentioned earlier," the Doctor said grimly. "This time, in cloud form."
"So, I'm done for," Amy said.
"Well, that might not be the case," Usagi said with hesitance.
"What do you mean by that?" the Doctor said.
"Yeah, what do you mean by that?" Amy asked.
"Um, have you been irritable a lot lately?" Usagi asked.
"Yeah…"
"Paler than normal?"
"What happened?" the Doctor said.
"A while back, I sort of, well…"
"Usagi is saying that she made Amy into a 'ghoul'," Ranma said.
"WHAT?"
"I was trying to save your life, when I gave you some of my blood," Usagi said. "But I thought that I would have given you enough of my blood to heal your wounds, not turn you into a ghoul."
"So, I'll be some zombie, soon?" Amy said, as she looked at her hands. "Wait, wasn't I suppose to be turning into a Dalek drone?"
"First, a ghoul and a zombie are two different humanoid states," the Doctor said. "Secondly, and this is a theory of mine, I think that you being exposed to the Dalek nano-probes might have forced the vampiric properties into your genetic structure to come to the fore."
"So, being on this planet only makes me stronger?" Amy asked.
"Essentially, yes," the Doctor said. "As for what has happened to you earlier: side effects of having some vampire blood in you have only magnified your natural tendencies, nothing more."
"In other words, your tendency to get angry has doubled," Ranma said.
"Doctor, is it possible to reverse these changes?" Amy asked.
"I don't know, since it's been a while since what happened to you has happened," the Doctor said. "But, I promise you that I'll find a way to help you in this."
"Okay," Amy said with a smile. She then turned towards Usagi, with an unfriendly facial expression.
"We'll have to talk, Usagi," Amy said.
"Yes, ma'am," Usagi replied meekly. As powerful as she may be, Usagi was still a gentle soul at times.
"Doctor, what's the plan?" Ranma asked. "You know I don't like standing still."
"But you can make others stand still," the Doctor said, as he turned to look at his old friend. "Ranma, you have a four 'angels' in your basement, yes?"
"The bad kind, yes."
"Of course. And I am willing to be that you have trained yourself to deal with them, just in case they attempt to escape, yes?"
"Of course. Right now, they are in Quantum Lock Mode."
"Yes, and I am willing to bet that since you are fast enough to deal with a Weeping Angel, you can deal with an army of insane Daleks."
"So, basically, I'm the distraction, while you solve the riddle."
"Unfortunately, yes, but think of how much awesome it will be that the Daleks, in spite of their much vaunted prowess of hate-filled warmongering, will forever be known as a lesser species compared to Ranma Saotome, aka Izanagi, aka Ranma Prime, aka-"
"Okay, I get it," Ranma said. "You don't have to stroke my ego any more than necessary. But what about Soufflé Girl?"
"And Rory and I?" Amy asked.
"And how about escaping this planet?" Usagi asked. "We still have a fleet of Dalek ships hanging over our heads."
"As long as you are a ghoul, you'll be fine from the nano-cloud, Amy," the Doctor said. "Meanwhile, considering the fact that this place was once a major hub for Dalek activity-"
"There might be a ship nearby?" Amy asked.
"Or a trans-matter pad of some kind. Once we rescue Rory and our mystery host, we can get out of here with enough time to spare…"
Pause.
"So, are we ready, team?" the Doctor asked in a jovial matter.
"No, but I do love a challenge," Ranma said, as he stretched his limbs. "After all, I don't like to lose…"
While the Doctor and the others get to work, Ranma engages the Daleks. On one hand, most were already in a decrepit state. On the other hand, Ranma didn't care.
"EXTERMINATE!" said one Dalek, as he discharged his weapon.
Ranma easily side-stepped the beam, and began to pummel into the chassis of the offending Dalek. So fast were the punches that it seemed as if Ranma used a single, powerful punch to break into the armor.
BLAM!
Ranma then reached into the organism that was inside the Dalek, and squeezed its brain like a zit.
POP!
"Fifty down, many more to go, as he continues his onslaught…
In spite of the Doctor's plan, there was one snag in it. It turned out that "Soufflé Girl", whose real name was Oswin Oswald, a genius in her own right, and member of the same ship that had crashed down unto the planet, had been converted into a full Dalek.
"NO," said Oswin, as she tried to forget the truth. "I AM HUMAN!"
"I am…sorry," the Doctor said, as he turned away. "There is nothing I can do."
Just then, Ranma shows up, concerned that contact was lost.
"Doc?" Ranma asked, wondering why the Dalek was not attacking the Doctor.
"We're leaving," the Doctor replied. "Oswin…was never here. Only a Dalek."
Ranma looked at the Dalek, and extended his senses.
"Wait, this Dalek…is human," Ranma said win surprise. "In fact…she's seems kind of hot."
"KIND OF HOT?" Oswin said. "I TAKE THAT AS AN INSULT."
"Huh," the Doctor said. He realized that in spite of becoming a Dalek, Oswin is still human, and still a victim.
"Doctor, we can always give Souffle Girl a body, if she being a Dalek right now is a problem," Ranma said.
"You can?" the Doctor asked.
"Um, hello? Usagi has her own personal cloning facility, thanks to being a Sith Lord, Mad Scientist or whatever, at one point in time, remember?"
"Oh, that's right," the Doctor said, not sure if having a personal cloning facility was a good thing or not…
"But we still have the problem with the Dalek fleet above us," Ranma said.
"MAYBE I CAN HELP," Oswin said. "WE COULD ATTEMPT TO USE EVERY TRANS-MATTER BEAM ON THE PLANET TO EXCHANGE PLACES."
"Thereby putting all the Daleks from above down to the planet," the Doctor said. "But we have to prevent them from deactivating the shield."
"SIMPLE. I CAN CREATE A LOGIC PROGRAM, VIS-À-VIS A QUANTUM ENCRYPTION PROGRAM, THAT WILL TAKE YEARS, IF NOT CENTURIES, TO UNDO," Oswin-Dalek said. "AND WHILE THAT IS OCCURRING, I CAN REPROGRAM THE INSANE DALEKS TO FIGHT THE NONE INSANE ONES."
"Both are insane, in my opinion, but I do like your plan," the Doctor said. "Anything else?"
"I can rig the planetary reactors to detonate, should the encryption program gets hacked," Ranma said. "That is, if the 'Dalek Civil War' ever ceases."
"Then, we have a new plan," the Doctor said. He then turned towards Oswin-Dalek.
"Oswin, I promise you that I will get you out of here, as well as get you a new body," the Doctor said.
"THANK YOU DOCTOR," Oswin-Dalek said. "IF I HAD A BODY NOW, I'D HUG YOU."
"Now that's a sight to see," Ranma said. "A Time Lord and a Dalek hugging? Universal ending event, I think…"
The Doctor's plan was a success, with the added bonus of Oswin-Dalek hacking into the Dalek network to make all the Daleks, especially those that were lucky enough to not transported down to the planet, forget all about the Doctor, Ranma, Usagi and all those who had has a history of stopping the Daleks from conquering the Universe. Well, at least those Daleks that were in that particular era in time, since it was always possible that there were at least one or two Daleks left to menace the Doctor…
A few weeks later, Oswin Oswald opened her eyes, in her own body.
"Be careful," Usagi said, as she looked down at her patient. "These are brand new eyes, so you'll need time to adjust."
Oswin wanted to say something, but couldn't. She then managed to turn to see Rory and the Doctor, who assisted in the process of getting Oswin her own body back, albeit a cloned one.
The Doctor moves forward, and smiles at Oswin.
"Hello," the Doctor said with a smile. "I am the Doctor, and it is a pleasure to finally meet you…"
Pause.
"And don't worry; there will be plenty of time for us to have a nice chat about soufflés."
Oswin smiles at that, before closing her eyes to rest…
Outside, in the observation lounge, Ranma and Amy breathes a sigh of relief, knowing that the procedure to transfer Oswin into a new body was a success.
"You have to hand it to Usagi, she knows her stuff," Ranma said, as he turns away towards Amy. "So, are things with you?"
"Well, the Dalek nano-probes have been removed, but I have to take medication for being a ghoul," Amy said. "And, I promised Rory that we'll go to marriage counseling."
"You do know that infertility can be dealt with," Ranma replied.
"Oh, I know that, but with everything we've been through, I rather work on my marriage than bringing a child into this world as a single mother."
"But you're already a mom, Amy."
"So what? Melody was taken away from us as a baby, twice, so I still want to try again," Amy said.
"Well, if you ever need a surrogate father for your third child, you know who to look for," Ranma said in a cocky manner.
"What?" Amy said. "Is the Doctor available?"
"Ha, ha. VERY funny…"
Tbc.
Author's Note: Once again, 'Happy Anniversary' to Doctor Who! You deserve it!
Next Time: "Dinosaurs on a Spaceship!"