Author's note: Just a very brief chapter this time. It's been a busy day.
I really appreciate the kind words on the previous chapter. I'm pleased with how it turned out - even though it was painful to write (and read) in places.
Beckett was sitting on his lap, her knees straddling his thighs. His hands rested on her hips, and her arms were curled loosely around his neck. Her forehead rested against his, and they were both breathing heavily.
Castle ran his tongue over his lips, still able to taste her kiss. He felt her lift her head back. He opened his eyes, and found himself looking at a beautiful sight. Her face was partly hidden by the frame of her hair, but he could see her well enough to notice her long eyelashes resting on her flushed cheeks, and the redness of her lips.
He watched as her eyes flickered open, and he saw how dilated her pupils were as her gaze fixed on his after briefly darting down to his lips.
"Are you OK?" she asked, a little breathlessly, and he couldn't contain a small laugh. Her face softened immediately and she smiled at him, then she leaned in and pressed another gentle kiss to his lips.
He sighed, letting his fingers roam gently over the curves of her hips. "I'm OK," he replied. "Really."
She smiled again, then leaned forward to rest her chin on his shoulder, cradling his head with her arms. She turned slightly so that her lips rested against the shell of his ear, and he shivered.
"Tell me what else I can do," she whispered.
He felt desire blast through him, and it took all his willpower not to slide his hands under her thighs, pick her up, and carry her through to his bedroom.
Too soon, he thought. Can't believe I'm thinking that, but it's true.
He took several deep breaths, and felt his pulse begin to slow again.
"For now, just… keep showing me," he said.
"Let me comfort you," she whispered, her full lower lip dragging across his earlobe and sending sparks sizzling all through him.
God, he thought, his hands tightening around her hips. He swallowed, once again fighting for control.
"You have no idea how much I want you," he said, his voice a rumbling bass note that came as much from his chest as from his mouth.
He felt her shift forward in his lap, moving more tightly against him, and she pressed a soft kiss to his neck just below his ear, bringing the skin out in goosebumps.
"I want you too," she replied, and he could both hear and feel the truth of it.
"I can't rush, Kate," he said, between breaths. "It needs to be right, like it was meant to be. Please."
There was silence for a moment, and he felt her take a long breath and then move back slightly, pressing her cheek against his.
"You're right," she said, her voice full of longing, and still a little husky. It was almost unbearably sexy, and he deliberately dug his thumb nail into the side of his own index finger to distract himself.
"I'm sorry," he said.
She leaned back so she could look at him, bringing her hands around to cup his face with her palms.
"You shouldn't be," she said earnestly, then a small smile appeared on her lips. "But for a guy who's not looking for payback, you are killing me right now."
He chuckled and nodded apologetically, then tugged her hips towards him. "Not exactly unaffected here either," he said, and he saw her eyes flash as she deliberately shifted against him, making him groan in surrender.
Her hands dropped to his shoulders and she moved back a little again, giving them both some breathing room.
Suddenly, she found herself yawning widely enough to make her jaw click, and she clapped a hand over her mouth. The day had been an emotional roller-coaster, and after all the highs and lows and highs again, she could feel the last of her strength slipping away.
Castle grinned at her abrupt yawn, then immediately found himself mirroring her. When he opened his eyes again he saw that hers were half-closed, and she was swaying slightly.
"I think I'm gonna fall asleep soon," she said sheepishly, one hand sliding down to rest against his chest.
"Mm," he replied.
"What a crazy day."
"But good," he said, and she smiled.
"Definitely good."
She looked at him for another long moment and swung one leg over his, returning to a sitting position beside him on the couch. She stretched extravagantly, and then reluctantly stood up.
"Can you call me a cab?" she asked, and he looked up at her in silence for several seconds.
"It's OK," she said. "We both need to process everything that's happened today. It's day one."
Eventually he nodded, then he stood up too and crossed to the nearest phone. He dialled from memory, and within a minute there was a cab on the way. He hung up, and turned to see that she'd put her shoes back on.
"See me out?" she said, with the barest smile on her lips, and they walked together towards the entranceway where she pulled on her jacket and and picked up her purse before stepping into the circle of his arms.
"Thank you," she said. "For so much. We're just getting started, I promise."
"I know," he said, smiling at her. He reached up to tuck a stray strand of hair behind her ear, then let his fingers trace a line from her temple down to her jaw and then her chin.
She leaned in towards him and kissed him tenderly, her tongue flickering over his lips and then between them. Her fingertips rubbed small circles on the back of his neck, and he felt the soft weight of her breasts pressing into his chest.
When her lips finally lifted from his, he exhaled quickly.
"Little bit more awake again," he mumbled, and she grinned.
He looked into her eyes and saw that they were shining. There was still fear there, but there was also hope.
"I love you," she said. "Can you remember that 'til tomorrow?"
"I think so," he said. "And I love you."
Her misty smile widened and she beamed at him. She caressed his cheek one last time, then she stepped over towards the door and opened it.
"Text me when you get in," he said, and she looked back at him and nodded.
"Can I call you tomorrow?" she asked, her eyes searching his.
He nodded twice. "You'd better. I was thinking we could get lunch."
Her face lit up again. "I'd love that."
They smiled at each other for several long moments, then she sighed wistfully. "OK. Well… goodnight, Rick."
"Goodnight, Kate," he said.
Her gaze roamed slowly all around his face one last time, then she nodded once more and stepped through the doorway, letting the door close behind her.