Finally! The day had come at last. After a whole summer of mowing lawns, cleaning pools, and delivering pizzas for his father, Ross now had enough to buy the latest, state of the art model of one of the newest types of dinosaurs to be discovered: the Supersaurus. His parents thought it was a stupid thing to spend a thousand dollars on, but Ross didn't care.
He made his way through the crowded mall toward the hobby shop, hoping he wouldn't see anyone from school who would harass him. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Rachel across the way going the opposite direction. She was alone, which was unusual. She always went to the mall with a group of friends. Ross would know. He often came here and followed them around at a safe distance, wishing he could be a part of their crowd.
But today she was by herself. Head down, steps purposeful. She went into an expensive jewelry store. Ross could guess why. His sister had let it slip last night what had happened at the party. That wasn't his concern today, though. Nothing could distract him from his mission. He turned in at Rob's Science Emporium, which happened to be directly across from the store Rachel was in. Ross couldn't help glancing over just one time. Rachel seemed to be arguing with a store clerk. Not his problem, Ross told himself again. Especially not now that he was a member of the I Hate Rachel club. Ross felt a pang of guilt thinking about that. Will had him helping to spread a rumor that Rachel had the sex organs of both genders. This involved Ross's making anonymous phone calls relaying the information to every student and faculty member at Lincoln High. He shouldn't feel guilty, he told himself. It was partly her own fault. If she'd only paid attention to him he would never have gone along with it.
"Ross Geller. I have a package reserved," he told a store employee now as he watched Rachel slump out of the jewelry store. Ross's eyes widened. She was crying.
"Just...wait a minute. I'll be back," he hurriedly told the man. Without thinking about it, he rushed across the mall floor, barely hearing the exclaims of "hey, watch out" as he bumped into a group of teenagers and a lady pushing a baby in a stroller.
"Rachel, what's wrong?," he asked breathlessly as he stood in front of her, forgetting to be nervous for once.
"What are you doing here? Spying on me again?," Rachel asked. So he hadn't been at such a safe distance after all.
Ross squirmed. "No...I just came here to pick up a new dinosaur kit. I saw you crying and I just wondered..."
"Never mind," Rachel waved off his explanation. "It's just that I damaged my mother's favorite ring and I'll probably be grounded for life. Unless I come up with a thousand dollars to replace it, and that doesn't seem too likely."
Ross fingered the tightly wrapped bills in his pocket. "Can't you just use your father's credit cards?"
"No, my parents took them away from me for two weeks. It's hopeless." Rachel wiped at the tears that were still streaming down her face.
No. No matter how sad she looked, Ross was not going to give her his money. No matter how grateful she would be. Unless. No, the idea was too crazy to even think about. But what if Rachel had to give him something in return for all that money? Something like her time and attention. If he could get her to date him for say, a month, maybe she would even fall in love with him. And being seen around campus with Rachel Greene couldn't hurt his reputation either.
All thoughts of Supersaurus and the I Hate Rachel club forgotten, Ross took the plunge. "Well, it just so happens I could help you," he said in the fake cocky voice he used on the rare occasions he had the upper hand over somebody.
Rachel looked up slowly. "What do you mean?"
"I mean that I have a thousand dollars. But I'm not just going to give it away. Here's the deal. You promise to go out with me for one month and the money's yours," Ross gulped, suddenly not feeling so confident now that the words were out.
Rachel was stunned. "Are you crazy? Why would you want to pay someone to go out with you?"
"You don't know what it's like being a nerd," Ross felt his voice crack as he spoke. He cleared his throat and went on. "If I'm seen dating you maybe I'll become popular too." He didn't add the maybe falling in love part.
"Dating me is not going to make you popular," Rachel said, shaking her head as if she felt sorry for him.
"That's my chance to take. Is it a deal or not?" This was the most Rachel had spoken to him in years, and he was enjoying himself.
Rachel took the damaged ring out of its box and looked at it for a moment. She'd gotten it out of the garbage disposal, but it was still broken beyond repair. No more parties, friends, the mall, or anything fun for however long her parents grounded her for. Hanging out with Ross for a month couldn't be that bad.
"It's a deal," she said quickly before she could change her mind. She offered her hand and Ross shook it.
"I'm in Rachel Greene's room," Ross kept repeating to himself. It was a nice room, decorated more simply than he'd imagined, with lots of pink and purple and rock star posters. He'd dreamt of this moment for three years, but in all his fantasies, it'd never been quite like this. He was sitting at Rachel's vanity looking in the mirror while she combed through his hair. Rachel had decided that before he was to appear as her boyfriend, Ross was in desperate need of a makeover.
"No one wears their hair like this anymore. We have to do something about it," she set down the comb and stared at his reflection in the mirror.
Ross blushed under her intense gaze. "I don't wear it any way. It's just my hair," he defended himself. His hair just naturally bushed out after it got to a certain length. He wasn't trying to make any weird fashion statement.
"That's the problem. You don't try to look your best," Rachel sighed and rifled through a drawer. Her hand emerged holding a pair of scissors. "Mind if I try cutting it a little?"
Ross eyed the scissors suspiciously. "What do you know about cutting hair?"
Rachel shrugged. "I used to practice on my dolls all the time...C'mon, just let me try."
Ross considered. His main goal in this whole crazy scheme had been to get Rachel to like him. He wouldn't get anywhere by arguing with her. And hair was just hair. It grew back.
An hour later half the hair on his head was gone, scattered haphazardly on Rachel's purple carpeting. He had to admit he looked better.
"Better?" Rachel squealed, "You look great! I'm a genius! I just wish we could afford to buy you new clothes...You could be almost cool!"
Ross noticed that there were several sections of hair that were uneven and his short bangs were somewhat crooked, but he figured his mother could straighten it all out when he got home. It was nice hearing Rachel compliment him like that. But then she said something that took that good feeling away.
"We need to make some rules for this thing now," Rachel sat on her bed as Ross twisted around in his chair.
"What kind of rules?"
Rachel laid sideways on the bed and lazily kicked one of her legs in the air. Ross watched, in a trance. "No kissing and no hand holding." Ross looked away, both embarrassed and disappointed. "Look, I know you have a little crush on me." The color drained out of Ross's face as Rachel spoke. He quickly looked down at his feet. "So I want to make it clear that we're dating for show only. Got it?"
Ross was getting angry. "Don't worry. I won't touch you," he grumbled. He jumped up and headed out the door. "Just don't forget to meet me tomorrow."
Ross had never been so excited to get to school before. Despite Rachel's misgivings and her warning not to get too close to her, she was still going to be his girlfriend for a whole month. It's what he had wanted for so long, wasn't it? So what if it had cost him a thousand dollars and the chance to compete in the National Young Model Builders Competition. If it all turned out how he hoped it would, the loss would be well worth it.
It was almost time for the bell to ring and Rachel still hadn't shown up. He'd been waiting by the tree in the schoolyard where they'd agreed to meet for fifteen minutes. What if she was backing out of their deal? He hadn't considered that that might happen.
Just then he saw Will approaching him carrying a stack of papers. "Hey Ross," he called when he got closer. He nodded down at the papers in his hands. "The next phase of our plan. We distribute these all over the school."
Ross didn't have to guess what the papers said. Will was pretty proud of himself for making up this duel gender rumor about Rachel and lately it was all he could talk about. If Rachel wasn't going to hold up her end of the bargain, he would be happy to help Will carry out his plan.
Ross looked around to make sure no one was paying attention to them. As usual, no one was. The few people still out in the school yard were busy chaining their bikes or trying to sneak a smoke before first period. Ross grabbed half the flyers and stuffed them in his backpack.
But as he finished zipping his bag and looked up, he realized he'd acted too soon. Rachel was heading in his direction, hair blowing in the breeze, leaves swirling at her feet. Ross stared at her and the wind buzzing in his ears suddenly became a song. 'Do I have to tell the story of a thousand rainy days since we first met/It's a big enough umbrella but it's always me that ends up getting wet/Every little thing she does is magic...'
"Ross, did you hear me?" Rachel snapped him out of his daydreaming. "I said I'm sorry I'm late. My sisters were hogging the bathroom." She grinned when she saw Ross was with Will Colbert. "How are you, Lard Butt?"
Will huffed a little, a pained expression on his face. "You're pathetic," he mumbled to Ross before he walked off quickly.
"You hurt his feelings sometimes, you know," Ross rebuked gently after a brief silence.
"Oh, we just like to fool around with each other. He doesn't take me seriously," Rachel insisted. She seemed to really believe that, and Ross wasn't sure if that was a good or bad thing.
Ross decided to let it drop for now. "Well, shall we?," he asked, offering Rachel his arm.
Rachel laughed. Ross was certainly nothing like any boy she had dated before, but she accepted his outstretched arm and they made their way into the school.
As the pair entered the big double doors at the entrance of Lincoln High, the world seemed to stop. Jaws dropped open in surprise as locker doors slammed shut amid the general hubbub of the beginning of a school day. What was the most popular girl in school doing with one of the biggest geeks?
Tammy, her frizzy hair flying after her, rushed forward. "What are you doing with Whatsherface's brother? This is for a school project, right?"
Rachel tentatively unhooked her arm from Ross's. Should she tell her friend about the deal? No, that wouldn't be fair to Ross, and besides, the story didn't exactly make her look very good either.
"No, it's real. Ross and I are going out. Now if you'll excuse us," she said, pushing through a crowd that had formed around them.
Linda came up to Tammy. "Wow, what's she smoking? Could you imagine having to kiss someone like him? Like, gag me with a spoon!"
Walking down the hall, Ross nervously watched as Bruce and Craig made their way towards them. They were always together. Ross sometimes wondered if they would lose some of their power if they were ever apart. Right now, though, he was only worried about being hassled on the day that was supposed to be a new beginning for him. He was turning over a new leaf, and he wanted respect to go along with his newfound status.
To his amazement, Craig clapped him on the back. "Way to go, man. I heard the good...well, the weird news just now." Ross marveled at how fast rumors traveled at school. Well, hopefully not all rumors, he thought, remembering the one he was supposed to help Will spread.
"Congratulations, Ross," Rachel said wryly once Craig and Bruce were out of earshot. "It doesn't matter how the girls reacted. If Craig is impressed with you, you're in."
Ross smiled to himself. He didn't have to ask what "in" meant. It meant he was part of the cool group now, or well on his way to being. No more suffering the taunts of bullies all day and no more dateless nights. Ross Geller was on his way to being popular.
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