You can't help but feel like you're breaking some kind of prison as you walk to Brittany's car after telling your friends you wouldn't make it to the bar because you had a tough week. Sam didn't even pay attention, but Mercedes looked disappointed and you would feel really guilty, but right now the only thing you can feel is that weird stuff going on at your stomach, which is messing with your heart too, 'cause it's beating crazy fast.

You know what's going on. And well, that's scary.

"I said 10 minutes" Brittany deadpans as you put your seatbelt. Hell, that's pretty hard to do when your hands are shaking like that.

"I'm so sorry, my friends, they-"

"I'm kidding, Santana", she laughs, turning the engine on.

She drives silent until a considerable distance from the playhouse. Then she looks at you, fidgeting on the seat. "Where do you wanna go?"

"I don't know", you say honestly. You never thought she would say yes, so you didn't think further about this whole thing. "Anywhere you want, I suppose."

"I was planning to take you to the Albatross, you know? That pub at San Pablo Ave?" You nod. She looks shy for a second, then her eyes widen like she said something she shouldn't have.

You get it.

"Were you planning to take me somewhere?" You tease, feeling more at ease around her. Then it kind of hits you and you blush when you realize what it means. You dare to look at her and her cheeks are a deep shade of red.

She nods slowly, blushing even more. "Well, kinda. I didn't know if we were going to meet again or if you, you know…" She doesn't finish and you get what she means. If you were too scared to talk to her, if you decided you're not into girls at all or anything like that. You haven't thought about it before, but it must be hard to her, to deal with you and with the things she may want – assuming she wants something, you don't know. You look down because it's so messy and so your fault. "But, you know", she continues, stopping the car completely, "it's a crowded place, and I think… I don't know, but… I think we should talk. If you want to, of course."

You don't miss a beat. "I want to", suddenly you look too excited. You clear your throat. "I mean, it's a good idea."

"I know a place", she makes a turn. "It's a little far, if you don't mind the trip. But it's far away enough, I mean, from the campus, that's… Good for you, I think. I mean-", her voice drops when she says that. It's like you're hiding because you're doing something wrong and you don't want people finding out about it. She's protecting you and you should be ashamed.

You want so bad to be just a little braver.

"Brittany, it's not like-", you start, but the words get stuck, so you stop.

"People won't think anything of you if they see you with me", you think she's saying just because, but there's a hurt tone and you notice. Makes you feel worse. "Because they don't know anything about me. Don't feel bad for… Wanting to hide. I get it. I said it before, I'll say it again: it's your time. It's about you. It's all about you."

She reaches for your hand before saying the last two sentences, and the way she says them makes your heart stop and beat faster at the same time, and you feel your whole body tingling.

She's looking at you like you're about to walk away if she says something wrong. It's protective and scared and you feel just a little overwhelmed before you reach over and kiss her.

It's a kiss that say thank you and I'm sorry at the same time, you can't help it. You put your free hand on her cheek to keep her in place and she closes her eyes under your touch. She smiles shyly against you mouth and kisses you back. Your brain is melting and you don't think you're able to think about how scared you were a few weeks ago. You feel like you're… settling with yourself.

This is actually okay. You're okay.

You break the kiss and your foreheads rest together as your hand continues on her cheek, stroking slowly against her soft skin. She smiles again and gives you a quick peck. "Let's go on a trip, then", she whispers, and the way she's breathing into your mouth makes you dizzy.

You give her another peck and it's decided.

"The Bay Trail?" You ask when she stops the car near a tree, and you can see a single bench in the riverside. The city lights are barely visible and it's quiet enough to hear the water sounds. You smile because it's kinda romantic.

"Is it okay? I like this place", you nod and get out the car, jumping to open the door for her, making her giggle. "Oh, stop, you dork", she jokes, smiling.

"This way, ma'am", you lead the way and you sit on the bench, staring at the water.

There's no talking for a while. You both keep looking to the river, with Brittany's arm around your shoulder, her fingers caressing your arm as you lean towards her, resting your head on the curve of her neck. It's weirdly familiar and you like it, makes you feel safe.

You start to think it's a Brittany's thing, to make you safe.

"…And then he was like, gone. It was his first week on campus and I wanted to take him to some frat party just because, you know, it's a frat party", Brittany nods, holding herself unable to stop laughing. "They found him at the roof – of course there's always a fucking roof – and they called me. I was super drunk and pissed because he was missing and I needed a ride home after. I got there, all attitude, and he was on the floor, mumbling, everybody around him. Then I started yelling 'back off! I'm a doctor!'"

"But you-"

"I KNOW! Everybody was like 'oh my God, you superhero' and I could barely stand on my feet. I started poking him on the ribs saying 'Sammy, I know CPR, do you want me to do CPR?'"

"You do know CPR, right?"

"Don't offend me, Pierce", you frown at her, but she just arches a brow at you and raise her hands. "Anyway, he didn't answer me, so I started the CPR."

"Did it work?"

"Well, yea. He went all Exorcist on me."

"Gross."

"I know. I just turned around and said 'my work here is done. Now you should call a priest'. I guess people are right when they say I'm funnier when I'm drunk."

"If I were there, I'd start praying", Brittany deadpans and you laugh like crazy. "No, I mean it. My cat was possessed once. I told him that those satanic things weren't a good idea, but he was so depressed after they kicked him out of the gang", you laugh harder because really, what the actual fuck? This girl is hilarious.

"I'm sorry for your satanic cat", you manage to say, and she has to tight her arms around you to keep you steady.

"Oh, he's fine now. But yea, tough times", she frowns, lost in memories. "Cool outfits, though. Red is definitely his color."

The conversation flows easily between you, almost like you were friends for a long time and just met again to catch up. You find out Brittany has a unique way to think and you find it amazingly curious. The subjects remain light and you never felt so relaxed than when she's holding you like that, arms around your waist, hands clasped against your stomach. Even though you felt suffocated when your ex-boyfriends tried to do the same, you don't feel that way with Brittany at all.

It's romantic but not at the same time. She's not holding you because you're in love and can't stand being an inch apart, or anything cliché and desperate like that. She's holding you because she wants to, and you want her to as well. It's simple. Being here with her is simple. You don't have to think about meanings and how things are going to be in the future. And you don't want to. As long as you can keep doing this, you're fine with everything else.

You know it's not that easy, not really.

"It's getting late", she whispers against your hair. "Wanna grab something to eat? Then I can take you home, if it's okay with you."

Again, that same feeling someone is popping your bubble.

"Actually, can we talk about something first?" Her tone is careful and unsure.

You take a deep breath. "Of course."

"I kinda want to see you again", you blush because the way she says it is so adorable and you feel like you mean something. "But I don't know how you're dealing with the whole unicorn thing."

"I want to see you again too, Britt", she smiles at the nickname and you get shy all of a sudden, because it kinda slipped. "But… There are complications. I don't see myself fooling around with you and don't want to do it, it's unfair. At the same time, I can't promise I'll be able to tell everyone we are… Whatever we're doing. And I can't tell you to keep it a secret, can I?"

Brittany's face changes when you say the last part. You see her eyes moving down and she's shaking her head slowly. Her grip around you gets loose.

"I'd rather not…" She starts, not sure if she should say it. "Do it again."

The way she says it makes you turn to look at her. She looks serious in a way you haven't seen her yet, and you never want to see again. It's painfully beautiful, but so damn sad you can't take it. You don't know what happened or if you want to know, but right now the only thing you want to do is turn her into her bubbly self again.

"Hey", you say, nuzzling her cheek. "Look, I know I'm messed up and p-probably not the best person to be with, for a thousand reasons", you sigh. "But… You're something else, you know? I-I don't want to take some time to think about stuff because it's not fair to make you wait and… I don't want to wait either. This isn't about me anymore. It's about… Everyone else. I know what I want already."

"You do?"

"I do."

You don't tell her wanting is severely different of being able to have, but that's something you'll deal later.

"You know", she starts, her grip becoming tight again. "There's a difference between a secret and not telling things."

"What do you mean?"

"People judge you all the time, even when you don't tell them anything. The things you do, the things you say, clothes you wear, friends you have", she sighs. "Grades. People you don't know will think they know you better than you do. But it doesn't matter, you know why?"

"Why?"

"Because they don't."

She lifts your chin and kisses you softly. Every kiss you'd ever shared had a meaning, and this one is your favorite so far, because it's her telling that you're safe. You turn around and wrap your arm around her neck, pulling her closer and it's never enough. She's in no rush, and when she skates the tip of her tongue on your lower lip you think you might faint. You open your mouth just enough to let her in, meeting halfway. She's not close enough and you're having trouble controlling your speed. You grab the hem of her shirt as her hands wander up and down your back, settling on your waist again and pulling you even closer. You're almost on her lap and you're not even thinking about it.

You break the kiss just for a second to bite her lower lip slightly, and you feel her smirking. You let go and when she moves down to your jaw you can't help but shiver. Brittany notices.

"What we did", she whispers on your ear, and your knuckles are white grabbing her shirt. "What we are doing", she starts kissing your neck, hands running on your back. "And everything we'll do", she grabs your lower lip between hers, letting go with a small pop. "It's our business. Not a secret. We're not hiding, we're just… not leaking the…" She licks her lips and looks down to yours. You're losing it. "Information", she finishes slowly, savoring the word.

"We just have to choose the right places to go and right people to see", you smile at her and her logic. You kiss her quickly again. "You're all kinds of brilliant, you know."

"That I am", she kisses you again.

When air becomes a necessity you break apart just a few inches. "Let's grab something to eat."

"I know a good place."

"I bet you do."

When you see Brittany stopping by Jack In The Box you just look at her with an amused smile.

"What? I get really hungry when I dance", she pouts and it's the cutest thing you've ever seen. You get off the car and she offers you her hand. You look around carefully and she just tilts her head, daring you.

You take her hand.

"What are you getting?"

"Ahn, a salad?"

"Santana"

"What? As a doctor, I think it's important to…"

"Two Bacon Ultimate Cheeseburgers and two Oreo Cookie Ice Cream Shakes, please", she hands the money to the cashier before you say anything. "Oh, I forgot the fries."

"…Keep a balanced diet", she takes you by the hand and guides you to the table. The waiter handles your meal a few minutes later. "Or that. I'm not complaining."

"Try the Oreo Shake", Brittany says, taking a good bite of her burger. "It's ouw-sum."

"Don't talk with your mouth f-"; you take a sip of your shake. "Oh my God this is awesome."

"Told ya."

You eat in silence, occasionally stealing glances and looking away shyly right after. You feel like a dork on those rom-com movies. That until she throws one of her fries on you, telling you to stop leering. You fake an offended look and say you're not, but before you could throw another on her she says she needs to go home.

"I can't believe you ate your fries AND mine", you say, shocked. "You're such a French Fries' thief."

Brittany just shrugs, "I said I was hungry. You were taking forever to eat", she pokes her tongue out and gets in the car.

"You barely breathe when you eat and it's my fault?"

"Rude."

"Just drive, Pierce", your tone is angry, but when she turns to look at you, you have a goofy smile. She kisses your cheek just because.

"Yes ma'am. Let's take you home."

"What about you pick up your phone, Lopez?"

"It's Sunday, 11am, for God's sake, Fabray. It's like dawn, why are you calling me?"

"Just checking on you. Mercedes were pretty pissed on the phone last night saying you ditched her and the guys because you were tired. And I know you, 'tired' is code to 'drink alone at home', and I thought… Wait, why are you laughing?"

"I went out with Brittany last night."

You hear a gasp and suddenly Quinn's shouting on the speaker. "OH MY GOD, SANTANA!"

"Please don't have a heart attack", you say, bored. "I don't have enough money to attend your funeral, you live too fucking far."

"Tell me every fucking thing or I swear I'll cross the state to kick your ass."

You snort. "As if."

"Argh, just tell me, damn it."

You spent almost twenty minutes telling the story, because Quinn kept interrupting to ask things or just to shout something random to Rachel.

"Well, Santana Lopez is a helpless romantic. Who knew?"

"Shut up, Fabgay, remember the razorblades. I'm still not afraid to cut a bitch."

"Yea, yea, whatever", her voice tenses a little and she speaks in a lower tone next. "I need to tell you something, that's why I called, actually." Pause. "My mother called me, she said… Your father is back in town."

You choke. "You're kidding."

"I'm not", she breathes out, sounding frustrated. "She asked me if you knew something, because it's been like what, three years since the divorce, isn't it?"

"Three and a half, yea", you correct, running your fingers through your hair. "My mom didn't say a thing. Do you think I should call her or something? I mean, damn."

"I don't know, Santana. Why would you call? It's not like she wants to know about him, I think."

"It's just weird, Quinn. He disappeared. The only way I knew he was alive was because he sent me an email when I finished Pre Med, saying 'Got your grades, good job, I'm proud. Dad'. It creeps me out still, I'm sure he has like, a detective or something tracking me."

"Ask your grandma, then. I bet she knows. She knows everything."

"She does, doesn't she?" You laugh, nervous. "I don't know, maybe he just dropped by to visit. Missed the town, old friends and shit."

"Do you honestly believe in that?"

"Of course not. But I don't have time for that. I have an anamnesis to write-up, my preceptor wants my head and I still can't figure out the reason besides the fact she's a bitch. Oh, and I'm on call tomorrow. How awesome is that?"

Quinn chuckles. "You sound like a doctor."

You sigh. "I sound like my father."

"No, you don't. You'll be a better doctor than him. You actually, you know, care", you snort. "I mean it, Santana, disagree all you want, see if I care."

"Whatever. I gotta go, Q. Call me if your mom tells something else. I'll call my abuela when I have some time and I'll let you know."

"Alright. Tell Brittany I said hi and I can't wait to meet her."

"Of course", if she detects the sarcasm in your voice, she doesn't say anything about it. "Bye, Q."

You roll on the bed but you can't bring yourself back to sleep, your brain can't shut up, picturing all the worst case scenarios that would bring your father back to Lima. Maybe Mrs. Fabray just saw someone who looked like him. Yea, his face is pretty common anyways. Of course.

You get up and pick your phone to call your mom just because, and then it buzzes with a new text.

Thanks for letting me steal your fries. -B

You smile and type an answer, saying you will try to eat faster so it won't happen again.

I'll be faster, then. What are you doing tomorrow night? -B

"I'm on call tomorrow, sorry, Britt", you say when she answers the phone. You wanted to hear her voice.

She just giggles. "Well, hello to you too, doc."

"Hey you", you suppose she can hear your goofy smile. "Everything okay with your parents?"

"They're alright. Dad's going to my brother's to get the rest of my stuff and we'll grab lunch right after. Mom's helping me organizing stuff."

"Didn't know you were moving", you say, just in time to hear Brittany telling someone – her mom, you guess – that she's talking to a friend. You wonder if you're really a friend.

She sighs and you feel her tone getting uncomfortable. "Hm, yea. I needed more space… For stuff."

"Your brother is moving too? With you, I mean?"

"Of course not", she hisses. "I mean, no, he's staying at the old apartment. It was grandpa's, so he doesn't pay rent."

It doesn't make sense but you don't ask.

"But anyways", she continues with a softer tone. "Any reason for your highness to call me?"

You blush. "Not really. I just woke up with a phone call and couldn't get back to sleep. Now I don't know if I should drop by Starbucks to grab some coffee or just have lunch already."

"So you called me for words of wisdom?"

"Pretty much."

"Hm, okay", her voice um bubbly and you think she's adorable. "Lunch with me and parents, not an option, right?"

"Britt", you warn.

"I'm kidding. You should call your friends, you know, the ones you ditched last night. It's only polite. You said your friend lives in LA, right? You should hang out with her before she leaves."

"Mercedes is so going to kick my ass."

"Oh, I'm so sorry."

"You're not."

She laughs. "I'm not."

You chuckle lightly, looking around your room, at the papers on your desk. Real life stuff. Right. "Hm, Britt, I gotta go. There're papers on my desk and they won't write-up themselves."

"Just ask the dwarves", she deadpans.

"Yea, I should... Wait, what?"

"I used to do it all the time in junior high. My homework was always done after", you want to laugh, but you can't, her tone is too serious. You hear her mother laughing on the other side. "It didn't work in high school, though. Guess they're not so smart for high school subjects."

You laugh. "You're too cute."

"I know", she pauses, unsure. "Any chance I get to see you today?"

"No idea", you say, honestly. "I have to write-up something because the due date is tomorrow and read some stuff because the teacher is up on my ass, but that's it. Your parents won't stay all day?"

"I don't know. Mom said they'll go to Matt's after they're finished here, so I guess not", she sounds frustrated. "Matt is my brother, by the way."

You almost say 'I know', but you stop yourself. "Right. You're not going with them?"

She scoffs like it's obvious she's not. "I'll have lunch with everybody already. It's enough."

"Uh, okay then", you're a little surprised with her tone, but you don't show it. "Can I just text you when I'm finished and if you're free I'll pick you up and we'll go somewhere?"

Brittany considers for a second before answering. "Sounds awesome. I'll text you the address."

You hang up and grab the papers on your desk, forgetting your coffee or lunch. You just want to finish them as soon as you can.

A/N: Thanks for reading, following and stuff. Sorry for the mistakes.
See you guys soon.