Charlie slammed the door behind her and swallowed thickly, trying to push away the traitorous tears that threatened to fall down her face. She descended the stairs quickly while she tried to compose herself. Miles is outside, just keep it together. Your fine.
That's been her motto for the last three years. She's fine. She doesn't need people to baby her or protect her, she can take care of herself. Because she can't depend on other people anyway. People always leave her alone, dead in her arms, picked over for someone else, or left abandoned on the side of the road.
She pushed all of those thoughts away as she reached the bottom of the stairs, compartmentalized them deep inside and pulled on her carefully constructed mask. Miles was waiting at the bottom of the steps looking up at her expectantly. But she shook her head and waved him off down the road.
"Come on, we're wasting daylight."
Miles stopped her with a hand on her shoulder but after seeing the indifference firmly on her face, he let it drop. "Yeah, but we need to go this way. There's another gate on the other side of town and your mom's waiting over there."
They set off in the opposite direction of the main gate. Charlie maintained her silence the entire way there but as they rounded the last corner she saw the gate up ahead with her mother lounging around nearby. She finally turned to her uncle.
"You didn't tell her did you?"
Miles didn't look at her, he frowned and sighed heavily. "No... I wanted to though. Then I realized that she might kill me too for letting you go with him, so I decided against it."
She didn't say anything. What was there to say? He's probably right.
Rachel was smiling her usual icy smile as they approached. She looked around with a frown on her face. "Where are Bass and Conner?" Not that she really cared, she just didn't want to seem inconsiderate.
"They aren't coming." Charlie spoke quickly so Miles wouldn't have the chance. "I guess rebuilding their little country is more important than whatever the hell we're going to Idaho for." Miles didn't try to disagree with her, he just nodded to back up her story.
Rachel's face went from a frown to the only genuine smile Charlie thought she had ever seen on the woman. "Well that's too bad," though her voice made it clear she didn't think that, "I guess we'll just have to get along without them."
Charlie resisted rolling her eyes at her mother and started towards the gate. "Come on, the days are getting shorter, we need to move."
The three of them set off again, Charlie in the lead with Miles and Rachel walking hand in hand behind her. After a few hours Miles and Rachel had fallen pretty far behind, so Charlie stopped to rest and wait for them to catch up.
She sat down on the back of an old car and leaned back against the window. Closing her eyes against the sun, she was overwhelmed by images from the night before. Bass' lips on hers, his hands on her body, his eyes boring into her. She ground her teeth together trying to push away the tears. He had said so much, and she had let herself dare to hope. For the first time in what felt like forever, she hadn't felt alone. She had Bass, and he had her. But she should have know it was too good to be true. Everyone leaves, one way or another. You should know that by now.
But then another voice wound its way into her head. But he didn't leave you. He wanted to talk to you, but you wouldn't listen, you walked away. You left him. That's on you.
She wiped the tears angrily from her cheeks. It wouldn't have mattered either way, he was here for Miles. That's all he cared about, and now Miles is mad at him so he's gone. Gone. Or at least that's what she kept trying to tell herself.
She took a deep breath and hopped off of the car just as Miles and Rachel came into view. Turning to continue her walk down the road, something at the edge of the forest caught her eye. Taking a closer look she saw two rabbits. They were bouncing around and playing with each other. 'I hate rabbits.' Bass' words replayed in her head and she smiled down at the little creatures. "Well I think you guys are cute."
"What did you say honey?" Rachel was looking at her questioningly, but Charlie ignored her. Rachel sent Miles a worried look but he shrugged his shoulders nonchalantly and she let it drop.
They stopped for a quick lunch beneath the trees. Charlie ate in silence a ways from the other two while they talked and laughed together. They were so close, and smiling. Charlie had to push away the small surge of jealousy at seeing two people so obviously in love, while she sat on the sidelines brooding over her dried apples.
You did this to yourself. There's that voice again, she couldn't seem to make it go away. Maybe, instead of running away like a little girl, you should have talked to him. You know, like an adult. She rolled her eyes at herself and got up, she needed to keep moving, it would help keep her mind off of him.
Miles may have been wrapped up in Rachel all day, but he had been keeping a close eye on Charlie. He knew she was holding back, he had done it enough himself to be able to recognize it. But he had thought it would pass quickly, a few hours worth of walking and her anger would pass, and everything would go back to normal.
But now, as he watched her walking, he knew something was wrong. Her steps were heavier, her head hung low, and her shoulders slumped. Somewhere he missed something, or maybe he had been to stubborn to see what was right in front of him. When he saw them coming out of the woods together he had known something was going on. But if he was being honest with himself, which he rarely was, he had been noticing things for quite some time.
Little things, like head shakes, and shoulder bumps, standing closer together than was strictly necessary. Yes, he had known for a while now that the two of them were close, he had simply refused to accept just how close they had become though. Miles shook his head at himself. He had known Bass for over forty years, he knew everything about the man. Which meant that he had made a huge mistake. Bass cared for Charlie, the thought gave him an unpleasant little shiver, but it was true.
And Charlie, well, she was Charlie. Brave, stubborn, and loyal to a fault. But she could also be naive and she trusted too easily. She was like Ben that way, always believed the best in people. Maybe that's why she liked Bass, as disturbing as that sounded, at one time he had been a good guy, a great guy even. He had been honorable and maybe that's why she cared about Bass just as much as he seemed to care about her.
All of this thinking was giving him a headache, he needed whisky and some time to think and sleep. It wasn't quite dark out yet but it would be soon, so as they passed an old, rundown shack he decided they could all use an early night.
"Let's stay here tonight. It will be dark soon and I don't want to have to sleep outside if we don't have to."
The woman felt no need to argue. Rachel was tired and Charlie was emotionally exhausted, she needed to be left alone to think. They all ate quickly, Rachel heading off into the bedroom to sleep, leaving Charlie with Miles in the small living room.
"Get some sleep Miles, I'll take first watch." She smiled at him reassuringly.
He got up slowly and walked over to her. "You alright kid?" She could see the concern in his face, but had no desire to discuss anything with him.
"Yeah, I'm fine." Her face was blank, all of the emotions carefully tucked away.
He sighed heavily and nodded his head. He walked a little towards the bedroom before turning back. "I'm sorry... about... this morning. I know that all of this," he gestured between himself and the room where Rachel was sleeping, "has been hard on you. I want you to be happy too Charlie, I just didn't think it would be with him."
His words washed over her slowly, their meaning finally sinking in. "But I thought you said-"
"I know what I said. But I was wrong." He took a deep breath. "If you think that that's really what you want... then ok. I'm right here with you."
Charlie couldn't stop the tears that filled her eyes, she looked away from her uncle to try and hide them. "It doesn't matter now anyway. He's gone, it's done."
At that Miles smiled a big goofy grin and rolled his eyes. "Nah, if I know Bass, which I do by the way, he's probably on his way here right now."
Charlie scoffed. "What are you talking about?"
Miles let his smile drop and gave her a slightly guilty look. "He cares about you." Charlie looked skeptical so he continued. "He does, I just don't think he's realized how much yet. I guess we both screwed that up."
Charlie felt hope burn in her chest at the certainty in Miles voice. He smiled at the look on her face. "You know what, you should get some sleep. I'll take first watch."
Charlie was going to protest but then she realized how exhausted she felt. "Ok." She got up and went into the bedroom to lay down next to her mother, she stopped with her hand on the doorknob and turned back to her uncle.
"Thank you, Miles."
She looked tired as hell, but she was smiling slightly which was better than she had looked all day. "No problem kid."
She went into the room and closed the door. Rachel was already fast asleep and Charlie was out cold the moment her head touched the pillow. Thoughts of Bass following after her swirling in her mind, leading to pleasant dreams.
Miles looked at the place where his niece had just disappeared and smiled grimly to himself. It that dickhead was what made her smile like that then he would put up with it. She was Charlie and he loved her like she was his own. He wanted her to be happy, even if it meant he might actually have to dismember his best friend.
OpOpOpOpOp
It had taken Bass and Conner over an hour to figure out that there was more than one gate that led in and out of town. It was mostly Conner's fault, he had kept insisting that they ask the local 'ladies' if they had seen where Charlie or Miles had gone. Eventually, an old shopkeeper had informed them that it was possible that they had left out of the northern gate.
It hadn't taken long to pick up their trail after that. Bass was by no means an expert tracker, Conner was even worse than he was, but luckily for them Rachel wasn't exactly light on her feet. If it hadn't been for her heavy footsteps, he doubted that he would have been able to pick up the trail at all. Miles and Charlie were naturally light on their feet and as the two men followed the trail they were, for once, grateful for Rachel's presence in the group.
As they walked along Bass found himself stuck in an endless loop of memories. Charlie's smile when she woke up wrapped in his arms, the stubborn look on her face when she forced Miles out of the room, and the betrayal in her eyes when she slammed the door behind her. That last one was like a punch to the gut every time. He just wanted to find her and make her understand, he just wanted to see her, even if she turned him away. But he hoped she wouldn't.
"Would you relax, your thinking so hard I can practically hear it." His head snapped up at Conner's voice. His son was looking at him with a mixture of amusement and sympathy.
He eyed him suspiciously. "I get that you had your little plan to get us together or whatever, but when did you become the friendly, caring type."
Conner frowned at him for a moment and then shrugged. "My mom used to tell me that people are the only thing that matter." He paused for a moment. "I used to tell her she was nuts. Food, water, shelter, those things are important. But she'd just say that those things were useless unless you had someone to share it with." He was silent for a few minutes and Bass figured he was done talking until he stopped and faced him.
"I never understood it, you know? I was thirteen years old, what was I supposed to think? And then she sent me away and I spent years hating her for it." He choked up with those last words so he tried to compose himself. "Now she's gone, and I'll never get to fix that. But you... you have a chance to fix this thing with Charlie. I want you to take that chance."
Bass was stunned. The only time he and Conner had discussed his mother was when Bass had told him that he was the reason she was dead. Looking at the sincerity in his eyes Bass had to fight to hold himself together. He finally settled on grasping his shoulder and giving it a tight squeeze.
"Your a lot like her you know. I didn't realize it until just now, I've been so worried that you'll turn out just like me that I didn't even see how much of Emma is really in you." Conner's smile was priceless, and now they were both fighting to hold back tears.
Conner cleared his throat roughly. "Ok, enough. I hate this mushy crap, let's find them and get this over with."
Bass snorted. "Now you sound more like my son." He wrapped an arm around his shoulders and they walked side by side for a while, stupid smiles on their faces the entire way.
A/N Soooo, funny story (not really.) I had this entire chapter planned out in my head. Bass was supposed to find Charlie and they'd talk and make up, and blah, blah, blah, and then live happily ever after. Apparently, my fingers had different plans because I have no idea where any of this came from! I sat down to write and all of this just came right out. Anyway, unless my fingers decide to stage another coup, this story will have 2 maybe 3 more chapters.
On another note I can't stand Conner so I have no idea why my fingers feel the need to be nice to him, I guess somewhere deep down I feel bad for him. Really deep down. :-)
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