Chapter 10
Brandon is alone in his room. He has been sitting at the keyboard for an hour now trying in vain to make himself play. He had tried to do his homework but couldn't get motivated to do it either. He kept replaying what had happened in the moms room. Why couldn't he have seen what she was doing? So here he was a couple of hours removed from that debacle, still sitting in his room alone.
How does this seem like a good thing? He knows what his mom said was right and that he had to let her come to him, just why does it have to take so long? His mind has been running through the speech he wants to give when she does come to him. He just doesn't want to lose her, somehow he has to get her to see that was all he was trying to do. He doesn't want them to take Jude away any more than she does. But he doesn't want her to go away either.
What is worse is tomorrow is the meeting with the ADA about her court case. He knows she is worried about that as well. It seems like she can never catch a break, and he had to go and make it worse. Well if she ever talks to me again I will fix things. It is after midnight so he isn't sure if they will get to talk tonight or not but he has hope.
Callie had been standing at Brandon's doorway for a few minutes watching him sit at his keyboard. She knows he was just trying to keep them together, but she has to put Jude first.
"Brandon, can we talk?" Callie says from his door way.
"Wow, you startled me. As quiet as the house is I should have heard you." Brandon says.
"Yeah well you learn to be quiet when you are in the foster system. Can we talk?" Callie asks.
"Sure come in. We can talk." He says.
She walks in and closes the door all the way. She looks at him for a moment before she walks over and sits on the bed. She looks at the floor gathering her thoughts as she contemplates her words.
"Brandon, remember you telling me about your moms coming to you and asking if the twins could come and live with you guys?" Callie starts.
"Yeah."
"Do you remember your answer, you said that you told them yes because you figured there was enough to go around. Remember that?"
"Yeah Callie, what's your point?" Brandon asks.
"My point is you don't know what it is like to not have enough."
"So what I am not suppose to be upset about this?" Brandon asks.
"No it means you don't know what it is like to wonder why the people who brought you into this world, the ones who are suppose to love you more than anything, don't. You don't know what it is like to wonder if the next place they put you in will get you beaten, or told you are no good. Or if maybe even the worse thing you will get raped. You don't know what it is like to have to piss someone who is drunk off at you so they will take their frustration out on you instead of your little brother. You don't know what it is like to have to pick yourself up out of a pool of your own blood from getting beaten because your brother spilled some milk. I love you Brandon I do, but sitting here in your warm safe house with people who love you makes you naive to what goes on in the real world for foster kids. Having both of your parents still in your life means you don't know what it is like to be with out that. You have a bad day and you get to come home and talk to your moms and they help you fix it, or get over it, or cheer you up. For kids like me and Jude we get to crawl into a corner and hope we don't get noticed." She pauses and then takes her shirt off revealing her sports bra, she turns slightly so he can see her back, she raises the back of the sports bra enough so Brandon gets the whole picture. She has several scars on her back from what appears to be belts and sticks. "You don't know what it feels like to have to carry these scars around, and on one hand regret having them so much you want to cry, but on the other glad you do cause it means your little brother doesn't. You don't know what it is like to have to do disgusting thing to keep your brother safe. You see Brandon I have seen and been put through a lot of bad shit in my life even being as young as I am, so I know a good thing when I see it, maybe more than the normal person. So when I say not to fight me on this I mean it Brandon. I would rather be in a group home and Jude be here in a warm, safe and loving place, and us still being able to see each other, cause as I said I know a good thing when I see it. I know it will be hard to see me leave, it will be hard for me to go, but it is something I have to do."
Brandon gets out of his chair and walks to where she is sitting. He reaches out and touches her scars on her back with a shaking finger. He slowly traces them one at a time as he looks her in the eyes and begins to speak.
"You know I was sitting here feeling like a complete heal cause of what I did earlier. I didn't think it was possible for me to feel worse than I did when you first walked in here. Now I feel like a complete ass. Callie I will do whatever it is you want me to do. But I do understand you want your brother safe. But you have to understand that I want the same thing for you. I love you Cal and I want you here with me. But if it comes down to it I will not protest if they take you. I am sorry for all of the bad stuff that has happened to you." He says.
"Not your fault." She says.
He leans in and kisses her softly on the cheek as he brushes some hair out of her face.
"It doesn't have to be my fault, for me to feel bad." That is all it took for the flood gates to open once again and she breaks down crying slumping into his arms.
Through her sobs a very chilling tale unfolds about her life. The physical and mental abuse and the rape that he already knows about are just a part of the horrible life she has lived so far. There were other occasions of exploitation as well as more physical abuse. Things like in one home Jude was used a leverage against her to set as a peep show. The guy sold tickets for people to come see her sit in a chair topless. No one was allowed to tough her but could look all they wanted. Shortly after her and Jude had been removed from the home the guy had been arrested.
All in all it was a harrowing tale that Brandon wished he had never heard. Not because it made him think less of Callie, quite the opposite to be exact. He now had more respect and was more in awe of her because of it. How this beautiful creature could have survived all the things she has and still be this kind, caring, intelligent girl that was sitting in his arms, he had no clue. One thing was for sure Callie Jacobs was a lot tougher than people knew, maybe even tougher than she knew.
"Brandon?"
"Yeah?"
"Do you still have that condom your mom gave you?" She asks some time later.
"Yeah, look I know I said I hoped it would happen soon, but I had no idea of all the things that have been done to you. I will throw it away." Brandon says.
"I want you to throw away the wrapper." Callie says.
"Callie you don't have to do that to prove anything to me. We don't have to do this right now, I said I would wait and I will. You don't have to be scared I will run into the arms of someone else cause we aren't having sex. Why do you want to do this now?" Brandon says as he got up and moved away from her.
"Brandon that has nothing to do with it. For once in my life I want to know what it is like to be with someone who really loves me. With someone who is going to cherish the memory and moment as much as me. To be with someone in an intimate way and not feel used and dirty. To have someone who loves me and who wants to be with me, touch me and hold me and kiss me. For that person to make love to me so for once I know what it is like. Brandon since I have gotten here you have been nothing but nice to me. Even when I gave you every reason to hate me. You came with me to get Jude out of that house. You have tried to help me in every way that you could. You pushed for us to be together even when I was scared of it and doubted it. You are the love of my life and I want to share this part of me with you and only you. So sweetheart I am going to count to ten and then I am going to come over there and start kissing you. So if you don't want this to happen you are going to have to stop me. 1" Callie tells him.
"Callie."
"2"
"Hold it."
"3"
"Callie?"
"4"
"Wow."
"5"
She raises her eyebrows at him saying wow, but does not stop the count. She meant what she said he was going to have to stop her.
"6"
"Callie, I am not sure I can resist if you start." Brandon says.
"7"
"Please."
"8"
He looks her in the eyes and sees nothing but love. There is no pain as if she feels he is forcing her. She has started to walk toward him, not once breaking eye contact.
"9"
"Callie make sure this is what you really want before you say that last number. Make sure you don't feel like you are being forced for what ever reason cause once we do this there is no going back." Brandon says.
"I don't think I have wanted anything more in my life. I love you. 10."
With that she starts to kiss him as she begins unbuttoning his shirt. He returns the kiss but stands motionless as she is taking his shirt off. She slowly moves her fingers down his bare chest as she trails kisses behind her fingers. She moves slowly around him trailing her fingers with kisses. She can feel him start to respond to her touches and kisses.
"Callie?" He says in a husky voice.
"I want this Brandon." She says as she comes to stand in front of him again. She gentle tugs his belt open and reaches for the button on his jeans.
Brandon had been motionless through out Callie's motions as she kissed her way around his body. When she came to stand back in front of him and told him she wanted this he knew he was losing the battle that was raging inside his head. He was worried this was her attempt at keeping him because she was afraid he would leave her if she didn't give him sex. But with those words and her undoing his belt then reaching for his button his resolve broke.
He reaches down and grabs her hands and raises them above her head. Her look is one of surprise at first, till his lips find hers in a passion driven kiss that takes both of their breathes away. He slowly moves his kisses down her jaw line to the pulse point on her neck. He hears a moan escape her lips when he hits the pulse point. His hands have been exploring her body gentle taking their time so he gets to know it through touch. He reaches her sports bra and pulls back looking her in the eyes, quietly asking for permission. When she nods her head he slips his fingers under it and cautiously and begins to lift it off of her. She raises her arms again allowing him to take it off. He lets it slide from his fingers as he takes in her bare Breasts.
"Beautiful." He says as he lifts her chin and starts kissing her again.
Callie is terrified as he removes her bra. She will be standing in front of the person she loves half naked. Her soul and her body will be bare for him to see. She impulsively lowers her eyes toward the floor, when a finger lifts her chin and she hears the one word no one has ever said about her in a romantic setting, beautiful. Here in this setting she felt it more than any other time in her life. She pulls him closer want skin on skin contact.
When their bare chest come in contact with each other both receive a jolt as if being shocked. The heat quickly begins to build as they move toward his bed. His kisses have found their way to her scar on her chest. With each lite kiss a little more of the pain melts away. Before they get to the bed he starts circling her body with kisses paying close attention to each scar on her body kissing each one. As each kiss lands on a scar the pain slowly fades from her memory. As if his kisses hold a magical healing power that makes the memories fade and the pain to leave.
"Oh my God." She says in a whisper.
He moves back to stand in front of her and touches her pants. Again she nods her approval and he removes them as smoothly as he can. She then reaches out and unbuttons his pants and tugs them down to where he can step out of them. Again he reaches out and takes hold of her panties and she nods again and they are soon discarded with the rest of her clothes. His boxers hit the floor as the last barrier between them is tossed aside they both get their first looks at each other in all of their glory.
Foe the first time Brandon sees the faded scars on her legs. He reaches down and touches them gentle with his fingers. Callie slowly backs her way the rest of the way to the bed. Together they get in and crawl under the covers. He moves over top of her and looks her in the eyes.
"Are you sure? We can stop now and not go any farther. I promise I won't be mad." He says.
"Brandon, open the condom." Callie says.
A/N: I was not going to post anymore chapters till I had the story completely finished. But the more I thought about it the more I realized I was dishonoring the friend this story is about. True I am using the characters from the show, also true is that Callie went through something similar to what my friend did. Where it differs is my friend endured the sexual abuse for a little over a year, Callies was one time. Also where Callie is going to survive my friend did not. So I will continue to post chapters as I get them done, regardless if I get reviews or not. Also the scars Callie doesn't have, at least not the physical ones, or they haven't shown any other than the bruises in the first episode. Those all belong to my friend. I hope the people who are reading it are enjoying it, thanks for the reviews I have gotten so far.