Chapter 3

The End of an Era

"She said, she'd be here."

"I know, buddy. Give her some time."

"She's never late."

"Relax."

Finn was nervous. As nervous as Poe had barely ever seen him. Not only because of the ceremony about to take place, not because of the hundreds of people gathered in the university's foyer, but because Rey hadn't shown up yet. Taking a deep breath, Finn wiped his hands on his trouser legs.

Shaking his head slightly, Poe took Finn's hands into his. "Why are you so nervous? You've seen her thousands of times..." He managed a smile. "Should I be worried?"

Finn's eyes widened in shock and his fingers tightened around Poe's. "Shut up!" He didn't sound angry, but he was frowning. "You know it's not that..." For a moment Finn looked like he was going to let go of Poe's hands and Poe wanted nothing more than to keep holding Finn even tighter. Of course he knew why. Of course he knew why Finn felt awkward around Rey these days and how much Finn hated the distance between them. Their friendship had not diminished, but it had changed and Finn felt like he owed Rey. Like he owed her for letting her down. But he hadn't, not in Poe's book anyway. Finn had made a choice. A choice, which Poe had found curious beyond anything.

During the war, during the last months of battle with the First Order, when they had visited Poe's father for the first time, he had caught Finn levitating a rock in the air, when Finn had thought he was fast asleep. Poe could still remember it as if it were yesterday. The clearing in the forest behind his family home. His head resting in Finn's lap, still recovering from the weeks he had spent as the Order's prisoner. He had felt so safe. So sure of what he had with Finn. So warm and relaxed. Secure, even after all he had been through with Bendar. For a moment he had drifted off, half dreaming of the time he would still get to spend with Finn and his father before he had to return to the front. And then he had opened his eyes. He had seen the concentrated look on Finn's face and then the rock, as black as coal, twirling in the air. He had felt his heart miss a beat and then Finn had realized that Poe was awake and the rock had fallen to the ground with muffled sound.

To this day Poe didn't understand why Finn hadn't wanted to pursue Force training, but he had stopped asking questions. Finn had his reasons for not wanting to get involved with Jedi and considering the history Finn had with Kylo Ren, that was not surprising at all. Poe himself had felt rather cautious around Finn for the first couple of weeks after his discovery, but had learned to accept Finn the way he was. Finn was not going to invade his mind. Not only because he had never followed the path offered to him by Luke Skywalker, but also because Poe knew that Finn respected his privacy. That Finn would let him keep his secrets until Poe felt ready to share them.

"Finn," he said quietly, grabbing Finn by the collar and pulling him closer. "You know she's not angry with you. You've been close even though you ended up here and not at Jed-" Finn cut him off by putting a finger to Poe's lips, who knew immediately that Finn thought they could be overheard. He kissed Finn's fingertip and then grabbed his hand to lower it. "-there with her. Studying..." Smiling slightly he shook his head. Rey was training with Skywalker and a couple of other Force-sensitives they had assembled once the war had ended. Poe couldn't help but admire Skywalker's courage to start all over again for a second time. Maybe Rey's presence had given him the boost of confidence he so desperately needed after what the Knights of Ren had done to his previous students. "You're doing great where you are right now, Finn. She knows that."

Finn's eyes softened, their deep brown as warm as ever and Poe felt a sudden rush of affection for his partner. If they hadn't been in the middle of a crowd, he'd have pulled him even closer, pressed his lips to Finn's until they had to part, gasping for breath. But this was neither the time nor the place for shows of affection like this. From the corner of his eye he saw people shuffling past them, towards the auditorium, where Finn and the other graduates would receive their diploma in a couple of minutes.

"I should probably go." Finn threw a look over his shoulder. Where only a couple of minutes ago there had been hundreds of sentient beings, graduates with their friends and families, there were only a couple of dozen left.

"Yeah, you should," smiled Poe. "See you afterwards. I'll be right here waiting for you."

Nodding Finn grabbed the back of Poe's head, pulled him close and kissed him. Laughing against Finn's lips Poe allowed himself to be enveloped in this one precious moment, before pushing Finn away. "Go on, you idiot. I don't want to be the reason you miss your own ceremony."

Finn beamed at him. "You're the idiot, Poe Dameron. You know that."

Before Poe could reply Finn had straightened his jacket and, after winking at Poe one last time, had turned around heading for the door to the huge auditorium. With a small twinge in the pit of his stomach, Poe let his eyes follow his partner. The shoulders weren't as broad as they used to be, Finn's frame was a whole lot smaller, than it had been when they had first met. Of course, that was to be expected. Finn wasn't a Stormtrooper anymore, neither was he a soldier and Poe was glad about both. Grateful even. Finn had left military life behind, his only connection being Poe, who was serving the Republic's navy again and all the friends they had both made in the Resistance. But Poe knew that Finn was better off, where he was now.

After serving in the Resistance's infirmaries during the war, Finn had turned to medical training. Now, seven years later, he was done. A fully trained doctor and Poe felt his heart swell with pride at the mere thought. Finn had come so very far after what he'd gone through as a soldier for the First Order. The conditioning, the uniformity, the sense of not belonging despite everything and recovering from all of that. By discovering his own individuality and accepting his own courage by being his own man.

Slowly Poe followed the other people who had been waiting in the foyer into the auditorium, which was already packed with people. On his left Poe spotted a group of Bith looking for seats, on his right he saw a male Twi'Lek and a female human leaning against a wall, their eyes fixed on the hologram behind the speaker's podium, displaying the university's seal.

"Poe!"

Poe whirled around and before he knew what was happening he felt a body crash into his and someone's arms wrapped around his neck. "Hello, Rey," Poe laughed, returning the hug and letting out a sigh of relief, when she let go of him. "Finn thought you weren't coming."

Rey waved him off. "Of course I'm here! It's Finn!" She beamed up at him. She seemed to have grown since Poe had last seen her, even if it wasn't in size. She was by no means the young girl he had met after the battle over Starkiller, but her smile had stayed the same.

For a moment he took in her appearance. She seemed to radiate a sense of confidence, calm even. Her physical appearance had changed. She was more muscular by what Poe could tell from her sleeveless white top. And she seemed so strong. "How are you doing, kid?", he asked smiling as the doors closed behind her.

"Fine," she said, wiping her forehead. She must have run here by the looks of it. Her cheeks were glowing. "You?"

Images of another man in his arms, of the very same face sneering down at him, flashed before Poe's eyes and made him feel sick again, but he pushed the memories of his nightmare far away from him. Now was not the time. Especially not when he might run the risk of a Jedi overhearing his thoughts. "I'm okay. Just a little nervous for Finn."

Rey returned his gaze with a furrowed brow and Poe felt like Rey might just be getting a sense of what he was concealing from her. He had become good at hiding it, when memories of his nightmares threatened to surface, but Rey might not be as easily deceived as most people. "Poe?"

He shrugged, relieved, when the lights were dimmed, casting shadows over his and Rey's faces. "Never mind," he whispered and turned around to face the front, arms folded across his chest. From where he was standing he could look down over the rows and rows of guests and students facing the podium at the very bottom of the semi circle. His heart missed a beat when he spotted Finn looking up at him. This happened all the time, even after ten years together, whenever he caught Finn's eye without meaning to, he felt like the love sick idiot he had been after their first kiss. Finn's smile made him grin widely and he ignored the Cerean taking the podium and beginning his speech. Rey stepped forward, closer to him and when Finn recognized her presence, he waved at her, seemimgly relieved.

Poe turned to look down at her for a moment. "Told you," he whispered again, before facing the front again. Finn grinned again and looked back to the front, but Poe just couldn't bring himself to take his eyes off Finn. Not now. Not when Finn had achieved so much. He felt Rey stir beside him, as if she wanted to say something, to continue their conversation, but she didn't and Poe was grateful for that as well. To him Rey had always been a person, whose company he couldn't help but enjoy and Finn, whenever he didn't feel like he had let her down somehow, felt the same way. Poe was sure of that. However things had become complicated the moment Finn had decided to steer clear of the Jedi path and only because Finn didn't want to let Rey down.

Though Poe had always been aware of the Force, of the way it shaped the universe through people it connected to, he couldn't help but feel resentment towards it. Of course there were the Jedi, who used the Force for the good of all, as far as Poe knew anyway, but his one encounter with a Force-user from the dark side had changed his perspective. Nowadays he felt uncomfortable even thinking about the Force. It made his head ache and his heart race, even if he knew that Rey was probably one of the people he could trust with almost anything. Still he couldn't help but be relieved about the fact that he didn't have to deal with a Jedi at home. Force-sensitive Finn might be, but he had stopped playing with his Jedi powers long ago, at least in front of Poe. Poe doubted that one could just turn off the connection one had with the Force.

Poe sighed. All of this was just too damn complicated.

The whole ceremony rushed by him. He couldn't even concentrate on the speeches being made up on the podium. The drawl of professors and honour students made him dizzy with boredom, but he pulled through. Only when the time came for the students to receive their diploma did he snap back to attention. Rey at his side had assumed a posture of nerve wrecking calm, her face impassive when Poe looked at her for a short moment.

"Mr Finn."

Poe's heart beat faster as he saw Finn get up and step towards the podium. Finn looked tense, his smile not even barely concealing his nervousness, as he received the symbolic slip of paper.

"Well done, Mr Finn!" Rey laughed, hugging Finn tightly, before Poe even got the chance to approach him.

They were standing in the foyer again, which had been decorated during the ceremony, which had taken three hours. Night had fallen by now and the reception outside the auditorium was starting to turn into a party. Finn had just joined them, grinning and apparently relieved, with all the tension, which had built up over the last couple of months, gone.

"Thanks, Rey." Finn looked down at Rey, obviously happy to see her and it made Poe feel a bit better about this whole situation. It never took Finn long to feel more comfortable around Rey. The build-up towards meetings was the worst part for him.

"May I?" Poe took a step closer towards the two of them. "I don't want to interrupt a happy reunion, but I also really want to kiss Doctor Finn right now."

Rey let go of Finn and looked Poe up and down. "Go ahead then, Commander."

Winking at her he pulled Finn close, wrapped an arm tightly around Finn's neck and put his lips close to the other's ear. "I'm so damn proud of you, Finn. You know that, right?" The pricking sensation in his eyes made him press his face against Finn's shoulder as a sudden wave of emotion rolled over him.

"Yeah, I know." Finn's arms around him grabbed him even tighter. As Finn's breath brushed through his hair Poe wiped his eyes on Finn's jacket.

"I love you so much." How far not only Finn had come. Both of them had achieved more than Poe would have thought possible. To survive the war alone had seemed impossible for a while. But they had pulled through. They were alive and healthy and Finn had achieved what he had been working for for seven years.

"Yeah, I know," Finn repeated and gently pressed his lips to Poe's cheek, wiping away the tear, which had broken free without Poe's consent.

When Finn let him go, Poe kept his arm around Finn's waist to steady himself. His knees felt weak and with all the laughter and people surrounding them he wanted nothing more than go home with Finn and celebrate in peace. But this was Finn's night and Rey was here. No, this would all work out. Tonight would be fine.

"Are you okay?" Finn's look of concern made him feel guilty about his wish to skip the party.

"I'm fine," he answered.

Finn threw a look at Rey, who just shrugged. "So," she said after a moment, changing the topic abruptly. "What are you up to now, that you're a fully trained doctor?"

"I've got a job at a medical centre on the outskirts. Near our new place." Finn put his arm around Poe's shoulder. The weight felt good. Steadying somehow.

"Your new place? You're moving?"

Finn nodded. Hadn't he told her yet? Poe wondered how long it had been since Finn and Rey had talked. Poe had never asked, but this felt weird. He and Finn had bought the house two months ago, how had Finn not told Rey about it? And why? Had he just sent Rey a written invitation to his graduation? Poe had no idea. And why had Finn invited her, if he hadn't talked to her in ages?

"We bought a small house, or rather...Poe did, I'm chipping in as soon as I earn some money of my own." Smiling Finn threw a quick look at Poe, before returning his attention to Rey. "Please come and stay with us for a while."

Rey raised an eyebrow and Poe could tell that she was taken aback by the sudden proposal. They'd had her over a couple of times before, whenever she had visited them, but it hadn't happened in a while. With a sinking feeling Poe wondered what it was that Finn hadn't told him.

"Where are you staying, Rey?" Poe asked, not looking at Finn. He was not going to let Rey sleep on the ship she had arrived in. What he hadn't expected was to see her cheeks going red and she dropped her gaze.

"With.. with a friend?"

"A... friend?" That sounded very ominous, but it made Poe smile nonetheless. "And might that friend be the reason why you were late?" Grinning he threw a quick glance at Finn, who, to Poe's surprise, was staring at the tiled floor in front of him. What was going on here?

Rey shrugged and when she looked at Finn, Poe was completely taken aback by the venom in her voice. "I know you don't like him, but it's none of your business."

"I didn't say anything!" Biting his lip, Finn still couldn't meet Rey's eyes.

The sudden tension between them made Poe withdraw his arm from around Finn. Something was wrong. Very wrong. "Guys, what's going on here?"

"What's going on here, is that Finn can't stand him!" Rey crossed her arms and stared at Finn.

Raising an eyebrow Finn stared down at Rey. "Where's that Jedi calm, hm?"

Poe could not remember having seen this sarcastic to anyone in years. Shaking his head Poe stepped between the two of them, holding up to hands as if to hold them apart. "This is so wrong. What's happening here? Who is that guy, Rey?" He immediately regretted his choice of words. Rey deserved better than this. "I'm sorry," he said quickly. "I didn't mean it like that."

"Nej Antilles. And Finn can't stand him, because they didn't get along in the Resistance!" Rey made to turn around, but Poe grabbed her by the arm, stopping her in her tracks.

"Come on, it can't be that bad!" He turned to look at Finn, who had resumed glaring at the floor instead. "Who is that guy?" The name Antilles was familiar of course, mainly because of the role Wedge Antilles had played during the Galactic Civil War almost forty years ago.

"He..." Finn broke off, shoving his hands in his pockets, apparantly unable to continue speaking.

"He's one of Luke's students," said Rey with a sigh. "And he didn't want to accept Finn's decision."

So that was it? The whole thing? Finn was afraid of meeting Rey, because she was going out with someone who hadn't accepted Finn's life choices?

"But this is ridiculous?" Somehow the whole world seemed to have shrunk to the three of them. Everything else was forgotten. The graduation, the ceremony, the party going on around them. "Finn, Rey never said anything against you. When did you last see that guy? It must have been years!"

Slowly but surely Finn raised his head. Rey had relaxed somewhat in Poe's grip and when she didn't look like she wanted to go anymore, he let go of her.

"Rey, I-" But whatever Finn wanted to say, Rey stopped him, by pushing past Poe and embracing her friend again.

"I'd love for you two to get along", she said and took a step back. "One day. Maybe not today, but maybe later." She smiled slightly at Poe and without another word she vanished in the crowd.

All of a sudden Poe was aware of the music blaring through the speakers. Of Finn standing so close to him, looking utterly defeated. He wanted to ask what had happened between him and that guy, but he didn't. Not here. Not now. Both, time and place had to be chosen by Finn.

"I'm still glad she came here tonight." Finn said quietly and looked back up at Poe. "Shall we go home?"

Poe shook his head. A couple of minutes ago he would've been more than happy to oblige. But not after what had just happened. He grabbed Finn's hand. "Let's dance."