AN - I'm crushing pretty hard on Jag & Jaina right now. NJO series will do that to a girl. Enjoy!
Her fingers ached, wanting to brush the stray strands of hair falling across that sleeping face.
A lifetime ago; in another place. But now, here, awake in the dark, watching the painfully familiar scene in front of her - she could not.
That little girl was no longer hers. The little girl who played pirates with her now gone brothers. The baby who shrieked and waved when her father held her high above his head. The young woman who had lost too much, pushed too far. The woman who was more and more like herself.
Han would still do it. She would always be his before she was anyone else's.
Smiling now, at the memory of Han's eyes when he saw them together. No longer children; unsure and timid, he had missed that in his absence. Had pushed them all away and flung his baby girl into the comforting arms of another man. He had been angry, ultimately at himself. He should have been there, he should have stayed.
She's only seventeen! He bellowed. Stalking around the small lounge of the Falcon on their way back from her recovery. She had been tired. Tired of fighting. Exhausted from holding on to him; to the life they had built. Annoyed now that he had strode back in and demanded answers from the people he had turned away. She had sat quietly that evening, watching curiously as the husband she didn't quite recognize attempted to deal with his children having grown up - and having missed it all.
I was only seventeen, she said simply, rose and turned from him. Enough for today, she had thought.
The hand resting on the blanket covered shoulders moved; awake instantly.
Leia pressed her hands together, willing her fingers to be still, to stop wanting, reaching and yearning for yesterday. It was painful, beautiful. It reminded her of a time, twenty odd years ago, when that was her shoulder, and his hand. And they were young and scared and tired too.
Jag's fingers trailed softly to the side of Jaina's cheek, smoothing the wave of dark hair which had fallen across her sleeping face. He smiled down at her, eyes soft in the low light. Leia watched and yearned for what had been; silently praying for what might still be.