There was a knock

"Come in."

Misaki looked up eagerly with a hopeful smile. That smile wilted when the person who entered was not who was hoping to see. He didn't know what he was expecting anymore. It had been four days and he still hadn't come. Takahiro grinned and hoisted a full laundry basket higher in his arms.

"I hope I didn't wake you."

"No, I was just…thinking."

Takahiro sat on the end of the bed and set down the basket at his feet.

"What about?" Misaki shrugged and picked at a scab on the back of his hand. Takahiro nodded. "It's ok. You don't need to talk about it if you're not ready. I didn't mean to pry."

"It's alright..." Misaki yawned as well as he could. His chest seemed to ache at the slightest thing. "What time is it?"

"It's about five. You slept almost all day."

"Wow. I guess those pills really knock me out. I'm sorry I've been such bad company."

Takahiro patted his brother's knee reassuringly.

"You aren't here to keep us company. Your only job is getting better."

"Yeah," Misaki averted his gaze. He hated everything about the way he felt. A little voice hissed in his head. You're such a burden. Takahiro and his wife shouldn't have to spend their time looking after a disgusting piece of trash like you. "How was your day?" He inquired simply, eager to push these thoughts aside for now.

"It was good. I went to the office. I explained the situation somewhat and they said they're fine with me working from home for a while. I also picked up some more of your clothes. Including…" Takahiro searched through the basket with purpose "your favorite sweater! I thought you might get chilled in the evenings."

"I really appreciate you going to the trouble…How is Usagi-san?"

"He's fine."

"Did he…ask about me?"

"Yes. He wanted to know how you're doing."

Misaki's spirits lifted slightly but he tried not to seem too enthusiastic.

"Did he say anything else about me?"

"No. Not really."

"Oh." Misaki found a loose thread dangling from quilt. He fiddled with it nervously. "I had just noticed that you were bringing over a lot of my stuff. I don't want to sound ungrateful but I was wondering when I would be returning to Usagi-san's place."

Takahiro stood and smoothed out the spot where he had sat.

"We'll…revisit that topic at a later date." He wrung his hands and started to head out. "Are you feeling hungry? We have salmon."

Misaki blinked at the change in tone. An unsettling thought chilled him to the core. Does Usagi-san not want me around anymore?

"That sounds good."

"Excellent. I'll bring up a tray for you when it's ready. I'd rather not have you climb up and down the stairs just yet. Better safe than sorry."

"Right." It barely came out as a whisper. Despite his best efforts to not be too gloomy, Misaki felt the waves of self-pity creeping up on him. Usagi-san doesn't want me anymore? Usagi-san doesn't need me anymore? Usagi-san doesn't…love…me anymore? When Misaki heard the soft click of the door latching he stood, with no small amount of difficulty, and walked to the window.

It was a nice neighborhood, definitely a good place for Takahiro and Manami to raise a family. He would be such a good father. Misaki turned a crank to let in some fresh air.

His memories had been coming back bit by bit. There were still large hazy portions he could not recall. There were also details that had not been shared with him. He knew that his attacker had died in some sort of incident. He hadn't been told the man's name or why he had been targeted.

Then there was the issue of Usagi. According to Takahiro, Usagi had come to the hospital once when Misaki was out cold. He hadn't been back since. Why? Usagi-san? However, when Misaki looked down at himself, he felt he could easily guess the reason. Is it because another man laid his hands on me? Am I tainted now? Misaki felt an air bubble build up in in his throat. I can't say I blame you, Usagi. I feel so…filthy.

Misaki jumped and rubbed at his eyes self-consciously when he heard the door open again.

"Misaki? You have a visitor."

Misaki whipped around so fast he gave himself a blood rush.

"Hey, newbie."

Oh, Natsu [1].

Usagi set down the receiver. It was the fifteenth time he had picked up the phone with every intention of calling him. No, I can't. Takahiro's words kept replaying in his mind like a broken record.

"Listen, I know that what happened is not your fault. I don't blame you. You're my dearest friend, Usagi-san. You must understand…if there was a man like that following your every move…if there's even the slightest chance that someone could… There is no easy way to say this so I'll just be blunt. If there was one Rin Yami, who's to say there aren't more lurking in the shadows? Misaki is all I have. He's all I have. I need to do whatever I can to protect him. Even if that means hurting him in the short term; even if it means hurting you. Whatever relationship you had with my brother…I think it would be better if you put it behind you. If you truly loved him, you'll do the right thing and let him go."

Usagi rested his head in his hands. As much as he wanted to fight Takahiro on this; as much as he wanted to scream "you're wrong" – he couldn't. He couldn't allow Misaki to get hurt because of him. Not again. If fading out of Misaki's life was what would keep him safe then he would do so even though it broke his heart.

***Just wanted to refresh your memory: Natsu is an OC of mine. He works at the same flower shop as Nowaki. He was introduced in chapter 2 and stuck around for part of chapter 3***