Ok, bear with me, this is going to be a LONG author's note.

I never do these this long, but this needed done.

PLEASE READ IT

Firstly and foremost. If you are going to pretty much leave a death threat on a review can you not do it as a guest because I would really like to be able to respond to that. As it is, since it was a guest, if you find it missing, I removed it because that was a little much. That's all I'm gonna say about that one.

Now… I know that was a tough chapter, believe me, I sobbed when I wrote it, I know. But this is not the first death of a child in Harry Potter. In book six a five year old sibling of a student is mauled to death by Greyback….children died in both halves of the war. Voldemort took a crap shoot at one of two, one year old babies.

Death Eaters do not care if it is a child. They just don't. And Travers murdering all the McKinnons is actually cannon. It is part of the original story, I did not make that up, blame JKR for that. It was a mission Voldemort put him on and he got captured. When he escaped in my story, he completed his mission.

Healer Avery is the Avery from Slughorn's memory in book six, Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince. He was Voldemort's friend. His SON is the Avery in the department of Mysteries, he would have been highly anxious for his revenge on Harry and Sirius after his father died trying to kill the boy. That is who Healer Avery is, the original Avery, friend to Voldemort. And you will see his son in year five, just like in the real books.

Yes, they had to die. I am sorry, they just did, it is part of Harry and Remus' character development.

The thing to remember is that this story is AU which means that because Harry is not completely under cover at the Dursley's and safe by the blood ties that Death Eaters WILL find them, and in order for Scabbers to go to Hogwarts, he had to be out of prison.

Last point- Anything that happens in these two chapters is NECESSARY for my character's development, it is critical that Harry still experience sadness and loss and loneliness even while he gets to grow and thrive under the care of an awesome Godfather. Everything is here for a reason, I don't kill characters lightly, everything has a purpose.

I am sorry if you don't like it, I am sorry if you don't agree, but, that is how the story goes. People died in the real Harry Potter, good people, innocent people, young people, yes, even children. Which means that any Harry Potter story taking place within the same times, should have some of the same aspects. I am sorry, but at the same time, I am glad that you loved Sammi and Jessalyn so much. I did too, and I was very sad that they die, that is why the last update took forever to post because writing it was hard.

Now, I am happy to get ALL of the reviews that I did, bad or good either way, reviews are always welcome and appreciated and normally I would have answered them ALL back but there was simply no way, and you all wanted the same thing pretty much. If you had a question, and I did not answer it, please feel free to PM me, I always respond to my readers. If you want a question answered, you need to be a logged in member because normally I don't answer questions as an author's note. This is a special circumstance. ONE TIME ONLY So please PM me or ask them as a logged in reviewer. I promise I will reply. But please…In all seriousness…No more death threats.. Thanks.

I am sorry this took so long but I was nervous to write it and scared to post it.

Chapter Twenty-Three

Picking Up the Pieces

Sirius sat on the edge of the hospital bed cradling Harry in his lap. He hadn't woke yet but the healers had assured him that it would be soon, he was just processing a lot. He looked up when the door to the room opened, expecting it to be Mel, back from getting breakfast. It was Dumbledore.

"Sirius." He said gravely.

"Sir." He replied respectfully.

"Sirius, have you seen Remus?" he asked softly.

Sirius shook his head, his friend hadn't been seen in two weeks, not since he left him to bring Harry to the hospital. The wizened wizard frowned and nodded in understanding. He cleared his throat.

"Sirius we need to place Harry with Lily's family." Dumbledore said gently but firm.

He had been telling him the same thing for the last two weeks.

"Listen Albus. Harry will go, with NO ONE but myself. And there is nothing that you can do about it. I gained custody of him years ago, so long ago in fact that the files are closed and it is absolute. He will go no where." Sirius replied with vehemence. It was a sign of the loss of respect between the two of them that Sirius called the man Albus, no longer referencing him as a superior.

Dumbledore sighed and walked farther into the room. His blue eyes pierced Sirius'.

"He is the chosen one. This boy will defeat Voldemort. We have to think about what is best for his future. Not your heart. I can't imagine how difficult this is for you."

Sirius was irate, only the child sleeping in his arms kept him from raising his voice, as it was, he spoke in a deadly whisper.

"You worry about him? You are concerned for his safety? You are right, you have NO idea. You see the boy who lived, the chosen one. I see James' SON. I see Lily's SON. I see my GODSON. He is not a warrior, he is not an order member, he is not a tool or a pawn. HE IS MY SON. When he wakes up, and I can leave with him. No one, will ever lay eyes or hands on him again. You will be lucky if he goes to Hogwarts because I WILL PROTECT HIM. And Voldemort and his sodding death eaters be damned."

Albus blinked at Sirius' response. It was obvious that this was decided, and Sirius was right, without his consent, there was legally nothing he could do. He sighed and left the room without saying anything more. Leaving Sirius alone with Harry.

It couldn't have been more than thirty minutes before Melanie came into the room, she gave him a sad smile when she saw him leaning against the wall holding the still unconscious child in his arms.

"How is he?" she asked, looking up at the charts that were flicking and ticking on the wall.

Sirius closed his eyes and sighed. "He is fine, just, sleeping, he just doesn't have the strength to wake up yet they said."

She nodded and sat down in the chair at the bedside and rested her head against Sirius' knee. He spoke quietly to her, though the enormity of his words was heavy in the air.

"Remus is gone, I know him, he won't be back for a long time, if at all. It is up to me to keep Harry safe, and secure. I want you with me, more than anything in this entire world. But you have to stay here Mel. I can't take you from your family, from your friends, your life. I have to take Harry, it isn't safe here, I have to protect him, but I can't put you in danger when you don't have to be."

She lifted her face to look at him.

"What? What are you saying? That after everything, you want me to stay behind? To leave you, and him? Sirius, I love you both, I can not just let you walk out of my life. I can not be left behind. You are my world, it doesn't exist without you in it." She said, a tremor in her voice.

Sirius sighed. "He has already lost so much, I can't have you with us and something happen to you. I can't let him lose another mother that way."

She looked at him, sadness in her eyes. "But he would be losing me now, he has lost so much, he just witnessed his best friend and auntie getting murdered, his uncle is gone, and you are going to ask me to go away too? You are taking the only stability he has left. He needs people who care about him Sirius. You are hurting him by keeping me away." Tears slipped down her cheeks. "I won't walk away from him. I won't walk away from you. You need me too, and I need you."

He looked up at her, speechless.

Sirius sighed deeply, his own eyes sparkling with unshed tears, he knew he couldn't stay with her, he knew that her being with them made her vulnerable to death eaters and would take away everything and everyone that she loved. He couldn't be the one to ask so much of her, he couldn't be the one that would ruin her life or cost her that life. Harry was worth everything that Sirius had to give, but he loved Mel too, and he knew that. He could not give her life for Harry's and he wouldn't. But he could give his own happiness for Harry's life.

He would have given anything in that moment for James to have been standing before him. For his best friend to walk through the door and to smile his lazy, always easy, smile. Just for James to tell him, he's safe, I'm here, you don't have to lose anyone else, Harry is safe, I've got him. Sirius felt a dry ache in his chest for everything thing that he had lost, for everything that Harry had lost at such a young age. This hadn't been what life was supposed to bring. Sirius was never meant to be Harry's father, that was James. James was the one that had grown up enough during his sixth year to be a father. James was the one that knew how to think about others first. James was the selfless one, the caring one, the one that was loyal to a fault. Not Sirius. James was the good father.

Sirius…Sirius didn't know how to be what he needed to be. He wasn't a father. He wasn't even a good Godfather. He hadn't been able to keep Harry safe, he had let him almost be killed by death eaters, again. He had let him see two of the most important people in his life, be murdered, again. The only thing he could think to do was to take him, and run, anywhere. Leaving Mel would keep her safe and hiding with Harry would ensure Harry's safety as well. As he opened his mouth to speak a different voice filled his ears.

"Daddy?"

Sirius nearly fell off the bed. He looked down at the small boy. As Mel jumped to her feet and leaned over them.

"Harry, oh Harry." Sirius said, cradling him up against him.

Mel couldn't speak, she merely let her tears fall in relief down her face.

Harry just looked up into Sirius' face before tears filled his startling green eyes.

"Is Sammi okay? And Auntie Jess…I couldn't make her wake up, she wouldn't wake up for Sammi and them men were laughing." He stammered.

Sirius' heart broke for Harry, right in that moment. Mel climbed up onto the bed as well, sitting at Sirius' side, she ran her hands through his tangled hair, tears escaping her eyes and flooding her face.

Sirius looked into the face of the most perfect child that he knew. "Harry, we can talk about them later, right now, let's make certain that you are healthy and safe." He said softly.

Harry shook his head and tried to sit up. "No, no, I want to see them, are they okay? I want to know they are alright." He demanded.

Sirius sighed and looked at Mel, who nodded her head.

"Son, you know how your daddy and your mummy are beyond the veil, something bad happened to them and so their bodies wouldn't be broken, they went beyond the veil to always be together and to watch over you?" he asked.

Harry nodded his head, and the tears that had been threatening to spill released, his little face screwed up against them. "They can't come home to me." He said softly, as Sirius' heart broke a bit more.

"That's right, they are beyond the veil." He choked on his next words. "What happened to Auntie Jess and Sammie was very bad, and very tragic, and they are now, happy, and safe, and most importantly, together, beyond the veil. With Sammi's daddy and your mummy and daddy."

Harry pulled himself from Sirius' arms trying to get away. Sirius released him, to keep him from getting hurt. He watched helplessly as he climbed down and stood in the center of the room, his little arms wrapped around himself as if he was holding himself together.

"NO! NO! THEY ARE NOT GONE FOREVER!" he stomped his foot.

Mel stood up and walked over to him, she knelt in front of the sobbing, adamant little boy. Sirius felt like he was frozen to the spot on the bed.

"Harry, little love, they are. " She put her hands on his shoulders. "Some very bad men, hurt them, you know that." She said gently. "But now they are beyond and they are happy, together, whole, safe. Sammi is with her mummy and daddy, right where she should always have been."

Harry dropped to the floor, sobbing. "NO! NO! She is supposeded to be with me. We said! WE SAID! We was gonna git married and be mummy and daddy and live in a dragon's cave and play quiddich all the time. And I CAN'T DO IT WITH OUT HER! I NEED HER!" he wailed into the floor.

Mel rubbed his back gently. "I know baby boy, we all need them, but when someone passes and you are left behind, you have to grow and live so that you make them proud."

He pulled from her. "NO, I WANT TO GO TO! I WANT TO GO WITH THEM, WITH SAMMI AND JESS AND MY MUM AND DADDY JAMES." He slumped into a boneless pile. "I want to go, I don't want to stay."

At this Sirius stood and walked over to his little boy. He lifted him into his arms and held him as his small body shook with sobs. "Son, if you were gone, who would I have left? When your mummy and daddy passed I felt just like this, and I still feel like this sometimes. But I also have things to be happy for. I am happy I have you and I am happy I have Mel. I love you so very much. And though I am sad about losing Jess and Sammi, I am so very glad that I knew them and I will always have them in my memories. They left those with us you know, you will always have your memories, No one will ever take them away."