Chapter 8

Author's note: I know I keep thanking you guys over and over, but this feedback is just incredible. I never imagined that my writing would attract so many people :) This chapter is really going to dive into Kyle's mind and may be slightly dark, so just a heads up! I hope you are all having a lovely week and I will try to update as soon as possible. Any kind of advice/critique is welcomed! So any suggestions you have for the direction of this story plot wise you can leave in the reviews and if I like it, I may incorporate it into the story in which case I'll give you a shout out :D I can't thank you all enough for all of the support you've given me for this story. Don't forget to favorite and follow! *heart*

….

'I leaned against the wall, perched on the staircase and biting my lip nervously. This was the first time I had been bold enough to come downstairs during one of their arguments. Each night was getting worse and worse. Thank Moses Ike wasn't here to listen to them. I watched their shadows as they stood on either side of the dinner table going at it back and forth.

"Sheila how can you say that about Kyle? He's doing his best in school."

"He's falling behind. He's the older sibling and I want both of my sons to succeed."

"He's going at his own pace! It's not his fault Ike was born a prodigy. They shouldn't be compared to each other like that. We don't need two advanced over-achieving sons. Kyle should be able to do whatever he wants to do! We don't even know if he wants to be a lawyer like I did growing up!"

"Your father and your grandfather were lawyers. They've led wonderful and successful lives! It's only natural to continue the cycle."

"Then why encourage Ike to be a doctor instead of a lawyer?"

"I consider Ike to be our son in almost every sense of the word."

"Almost? ALMOST?! He IS our son!"

"Not by blood. It only makes sense that Kyle continues your legacy, Gerald!"

"You sound like my mother."

"Your mother was an intelligent and wonderful woman who took me under her wing! She was the only one in your family who didn't treat me like Jersey muff cabbage! She helped me understand how to be sophisticated and how to raise her grandchildren properly! There's hardly any trace of my past in Kyle and I'm going to keep it that way!"

"My mother was a selfish bitch who thought tradition and wealth were more important than her own CHILDREN! You're treating Kyle just like she treated me!"

"Kyle never told me he didn't want to be a lawyer! He knows what will help his future! And with the way he's going, he'll never get into Harvard like Ike! Kyle needs to be more like Ike! Ike is responsible, decisive and intuitive! Just like a Broflovski should be! And he's not even our biological child!"

"There's nothing wrong with Kyle!"

"There won't be when I shape him!"

"How can you say that?! He will never be on the level Ike is because he ISN'T IKE!"

"OH WE'RE DOING THIS AGAIN GERALD?! JUST GIVE THE NEIGHBORS SOMETHING ELSE TO GOSSIP ABOUT!"

"IS REPUTATION ALL YOU GIVE A SHIT ABOUT?! YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT THIS IS DOING TO KYLE!"

"HE IS JUST AS CAPABLE GERALD! I WILL SECURE OUR SON'S FUTURES BECAUSE I KNOW WHAT IS BEST FOR THE BOTH OF THEM! I WONT LET YOU RUIN WHAT YOUR MOTHER STARTED! KYLE WILL HAVE A WONDERFUL FUTURE!"

"This isn't about HIM, Sheila. This is about YOU. This has ALWAYS been about your dead dreams! About the future YOU always wanted for YOURSELF! A family you could TAKE CREDIT FOR!"

"GET OUT OF MY FUCKING HOUSE!"'

I gasped, jolting awake as the sound of the slamming door reverberated in my mind. I was breathing heavily, sweat gathered on my forehead, which made my hair stick to my neck. I looked around the room until my eyes found the clock on Cartman's television stand.

8:30 am

I rubbed my eyes and felt my head pound angrily between my ears, my nose filling with the smell of bacon. Stretching carefully, my delicate side aching in protest, I let my eyes wander towards the kitchen. Where I expected Mrs. Cartman to be, stood Cartman, in front of the stove while wearing a frilly pink apron and humming quietly. I smiled almost immediately, suppressing the nagging urge to laugh hysterically at the sight. I allowed my legs to swing over the side of the couch and stretched out my legs before my feet had a chance to touch the ground. Even if it was just a few hours, it was more sleep then I'd had in weeks. I continued to watch Cartman as he was preparing breakfast as if it was second nature.

He must do this all the time…

"You're up early." Cartman said, not once making any effort to look behind him.

"…You have good ears." I mumbled and stood up, a little shaky. I spotted my hat on the coat rack and wondered to myself when it had left my head.

I could have sworn I fell asleep with it on.

"I don't need good ears to know when you're awake, Jew. Want some bacon?" he asked. I could hear the smile in his voice. I rolled my eyes.

"Very funny fatass. You know I can't eat that."

"You don't know what you're missing, poodle head." Cartman snickered. My face flushed and I grabbed a pillow from the couch and held it over my ridiculous hair, trying to conceal it as I went for my hat.

"S-shut up!" I exclaimed and dropped the pillow, stuffing all of my hair into the green hat. I heard him laughing behind me as he walked over with a plate of food. "At least I'm not sporting a frilly pink apron! What a girly thing to wear!"

"I didn't realize kikes were so knowledgeable about fashion!" Cartman retorted. I was about to lunge at him, but he handed me a plate of food. I looked at it blankly, noticing the scrambled eggs, pancakes, and sliced apples. "Take it already! Jesus Christ."

Face ablaze, my eyes burned into his in an attempt to detect any sort of trickery, I took the plate from him. He chuckled and walked over to the kitchen sink.

"If I wanted to poison you I would have tainted the juice, dumbass. Oh! That reminds me! Here's your orange juice Kahhhlll." He sung, his eyes closed sheepishly as he handed me a glass. I scowled as I took it from him and sat down at the dining room table.

"Very funny Cartman." I mumbled. "…Thank you."

He seemed to get irritated as he got his own food and joined me.

"Yeah whatever. I'm kicking out Stan and Kenny at like 10:30. Bunch of fucking freeloaders." He said as he poured himself a cup of juice. As I started to eat, I couldn't help but revel in how good the food was.

"Wow Cartman. I didn't know you could cook! This is really good!" I exclaimed, eating quickly. I noticed him fidget in his seat and look away from me. I could have sworn I saw his nose turn red…

"…It's easy. My mom taught me how." He replied. "I'm okay at cooking. I don't know how to cook dirty Jewish food so don't ask me. …You talk in your sleep by the way."

I froze. He saw the panic in my eyes and started to eat his food so I could let what he said sink in. It took me a while to lower my fork, and when my hand touched the table I was able to force myself to speak.

"…w-what did I say?" I asked, my voice trembling slightly. Cartman shrugged and took a swig from his glass, draining it.

"You sounded like you were in pain. And you were moving around a lot so your hat fell off and I had to hang it up. I'm not doing that ever again. I was being nice cuz you haven't been able to sleep or whatever but next time I'll wake you up Kahl. I'm not your fucking maid." He spat. I nodded and went back to my food, my hand shaking. Cartman noticed and pointed at it. "Don't forget your insuh whatever. I'm not saving your ass again."

"I don't need another mom, Cartman!" I snapped at him, wiping my mouth. My plate was empty. I didn't realize I was so hungry.

"Psh I'd be a better mom than that fat bitch." He replied, smiling at my anger. I took my plate to the sink trying to convince myself not to give into him. "What did you finally realize that I'm right?"

Shut up.

I growled under my breath, passing by him to get to the stairs. He stood in front of me, folding his arms.

"Just admit that she's a lunatic."

I felt the anger start to bubble in my gut as I clenched my fists. Once again he was taking things too far. I said nothing, my vision starting to distort slightly.

"Cartman…" I warned. My voice was dangerously low. "Don't."

"Just say it and I'll move. Say it. Say your mom's a big fat stupid bit-"

I slammed him into the wall, my forearm cutting off his air supply. Anger pulsed through me as I glared, my eyes burning into his.

"SHUT YOUR FUCKING MOUTH!" I snarled. He blinked in surprise, shifting under me. He grabbed my arm and shoved me off, much gentler than he should have. This wasn't our normal fighting. I was so fucking angry. I wanted to rip out his fucking throat! "DON'T CALL HER THAT!"

"How the fuck can you defend her?!" he demanded, moving out of the way when I lunged again. "Calm the fuck down!"

"NO!" I snarled. "I'm sick and tired of you telling me how much of a bitch my mom is! She loves me god damn it!"

"If she loved you she wouldn't beat the shit out of you Kyle!" Cartman snapped.

"YOU DON'T KNOW ANYTHING! WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU KNOW ABOUT LOVE?!" I roared, seriously losing it. Cartman's eyes bore into mine, accepting my unspoken challenge.

"I know the difference between LOVE AND CONTROL! All your mom does is control you! She tells you what to say, what to do, what to believe, and what to fucking think! Look at how she's brainwashed you, you fucking JEWRAT! You're DEFENDING someone who did THIS to you!" He exclaimed, pulling my shirt up and revealing my bruise. I shoved him away instantly and tugged my shirt back down. I was seething at this point.

"YOU WERE BROUGHT UP WITHOUT ANY CONTROL! WITHOUT ANY BOUNDARIES! And ANYONE who is DIFFERENT when compared to YOU, you fucking EXPLOIT them and make them feel like absolute SHIT! And god forbid you don't get your fucking way! At least I was brought up to know the difference between right and fucking WRONG!" I snarled.

"At least I can hold my fucking own KIKE! You just let everyone walk all over you so excuse me for making fun of your pussy whipped attitude!"

"Why the FUCK have you taken it upon yourself to suddenly give a shit about my issues at home, ASSHOLE?!"

"I DON'T! I DON'T GIVE A FLYING FUCK!"

"AT LEAST I DON'T PRETEND TO BE SOMEONE I'M NOT CARTMAN!"

"I don't pretend!" Cartman snorted. "I don't know what the fuck you mean by that!"

"Yes you DO! You treat everyone like fucking shit all the time and then you just DO SOMETHING NICE! It's fucking STUPID! YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO HATE ME!" I threw a punch at him, but he caught my wrist and held it there. "LET GO DAMN IT!"

"Don't psycho analyze me KAHL!" He tightened his grip on my wrist. "You don't know what's in my head! No one knows what's in my head except me!"

"YEAH! BECAUSE YOU DON'T LET ANYONE IN! Not STAN or KENNY! I know you fucking HATE me but all of us are still your friends!" I tore my wrist away from him, pushing him back against the wall. Something seemed to soften in his eyes.

"I don't have any fucking friends Jew! But at least I don't let people beat the shit out of me! At least MY mom isn't a bitch!"

"At least my mom's not a CRACK WHORE!" I replied in my anger, shoving him again. His face darkened. Cartman grabbed, spun, and pinned me in the exact spot where I had tried to pin him. I felt his body against mine and struggled to move, fearing that he would crush me. His grip was tight and merciless, my arms screaming at his touch. We were both out of breath and I could feel his heartbeat through his hands. When my eyes found his, my heart plunged. I snapped out of my angry rampage and almost pissed myself at his expression as he lowered his head to mine.

"Don't. Ever. Say. That. Again." He growled, his lips at my ear. "I will break your pale little neck so fast, you won't even have time to fucking blink."

I trembled against him and nodded, absolutely petrified. He let me go and I backed up to the stairs, watching him as I went. He stayed in the same spot, never looking back at me as I stumbled up the stairs to get my things.

What the hell came over me? I've never been that mad…

I fished my stuff out of Stan's and Kenny's, stuck myself with my insulin, and headed into the bathroom to change. Stan and Kenny were still fast asleep. Their snores were really loud. How the hell did they manage to sleep through our screaming fest? I pulled my clothes on quickly and packed my bag, heading down the stairs quickly. Cartman was at the table and didn't look up at me as I went over to the door. Even so, I paused for a moment and watched him sit there. I felt really horrible.

"…I'm sorry." I almost whispered. He didn't budge from his seat. I watched his fist tighten and his jaw clench.

"Fuck you." He spat.

I felt a stabbing pain in my chest and slowly walked outside, gently closing the door behind me. I was in such a hurry I forgot to brush my teeth. I could still taste the alcohol in my mouth and shuddered in disgust. It added to the dread I felt inside as I walked down the street, the cold wind stinging my eyes.

Wow.

I'm a total asshole.