Chapter 12
Author's Note: Enjoy :3 Don't forget to follow favorite and review! I cherish all of your opinions a great deal! WARNING! LIMES AHEAD! I REPEAT LIMES AHEAD!
DO NOT PROCEED IF YOU DO NOT LIKE KYMANY LIMEY GOODNESS!
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I was still coming down from my high when I looked over my shoulder at Cartman. He was standing in the bathroom doorway and staring directly at the glass shard in my hand. Before I could react, he slammed the bathroom door shut behind him and locked it. I dropped my glass shard and yanked my shirt down in a pathetic attempt to cover the profusely bleeding wounds on my hip. The blood quickly seeped through the fabric as Cartman turned around and grabbed me by the collar of my shirt, his eyes burning with a combination of confusion and anger. He pulled me close enough for our noses to touch, his fist audibly tightening around my shirt. I was finally able to snap out of the shock.
"W-What are you doing in my house, fatass?!" I demanded, still slightly out of it. My blood covered hands feebly pushed against his body in an effort to get away from him. He was like a concrete wall against my palms. There was no way he was going to budge. His eyes narrowed and I gulped.
"This… Is this what you've become, Kahl?" he growled in a low rumble. I shivered at his tone. "A FUCKING EMO?!"
"I'm NOT an emo!" I snarled right in his face. He scoffed and shoved me away letting me fall back on the stool, his eyes fixated on the spreading blood stain.
"Yeah right you pussy! Why the FUCK wouldn't you call me?!" he demanded. "You know what? I don't give a shit! For the next hour you are going to sit the fuck down, shut the fuck up, and do everything I fucking tell you to GOD DAMMIT!"
I blinked, absolutely horrified.
"What?!" I snapped. "Why the fuck would I do that?!"
"Because you're my fucking Jew and I said so! Now sit on the edge of the tub!" he commanded. I just stared at him, unmoving. His eyes narrowed and I remained frozen in place, just shocked.
…his…jew?
"Kahl sit on the edge of the GOD DAMNED TUB!" he exclaimed. I didn't hesitate this time. I sat down on the edge of the tub. The stool had a blood puddle where I had been sitting, so I stared at it. Cartman kicked it out of the way and picked up a towel, kneeling in front of me. "Take off your pants and your shirt."
"W-W-WHA-" I choked, but he slapped his gloved hand right over my mouth, face hardened. I was numb at what he was asking me to do. Well… I was still numb in general. I couldn't even feel the blush on my cheeks, but I knew it was there nonetheless.
"I DIDN'T SAY YOU COULD FUCKING TALK YOU DUMB KIKE! Do you have underwear on underneath?!" he asked, completely serious. I nodded pathetically. "Then don't make it fucking weird, alright?! Just do it!"
I squeezed my eyes shut in embarrassment and reached down to undo my pants, my hands trembling. I couldn't even grip the zipper properly; I was so dizzy and nervous. Cartman sucked his teeth loudly in impatience and replaced my hands with his now ungloved ones. I whimpered in protest, but he shot me a look that shut me up almost instantly.
"Don't. Make it. Weird." He demanded. I stared back at him in fear and my entire body shivered. He seemed to be frustrated at my expression. "Jesus Christ Kahl, you act like I'm going to hurt you or something."
"…C-can you blame me? After everything I said to you? A-and then your mom…" I trailed off as he pulled down my blood stained pants and tossed them to the floor with my shoes. He looked me right in the eyes, his expression making my heart skip a beat.
Did he have a black eye?
"It's not your fault that happened. And I told you to shut the fuck up. You're not a good listener, Jewrat. Keep your mouth shut and let me fucking help you. I'm seriously." He growled. I nodded obediently and started to sloppily pull off my shirt. Cartman slapped my hands away and began doing it himself. "Daywalkers are so fucking slow! You wanna bleed out? Why are you wearing this stupid long sleeved faggy sweater anyway?"
I didn't answer. I didn't have to. The moment it was off, his attention was on my arms. They looked much worse than they did this morning. He grabbed my wrists and turned them over so he could get a clear view. His expression was something I couldn't read. I felt my eyes droop a bit, my hip still bleeding. I blinked a couple of times as Cartman seemed to break out of his daze, his eyes never leaving the mess on my arms. He turned his attention to my hip, pressing down on the wound with the towel and applying pressure so the bleeding would stop. But I know that his mind never left my arms.
"Christ…" he whispered, and turned his eyes on mine once more. They were filled with horror and surprise. As if he didn't know I was capable of such things. Something clicked in my brain and I felt guilt rise inside of me as his look became a glare of disappointment. "When did you do this?"
I looked away, closing my eyes. Maybe if I ignored him he would just turn out to be a figment of my imagination and he would disappear. …But then I would be lonely. He suddenly grabbed my hat, gripping the hair concealed inside of it and tugged roughly. The action made me cry out and forced me to look him right in the eyes. The image before me was shocking.
He was… tearing up.
"C-Cartman…" I whispered. His jaw clenched and he blinked away the forming tears.
"When. Did. You. Do. This." He demanded through clenched teeth.
"…After our fight when I left…" I began, my voice shaky and uneven. "I didn't mean t-to… to make you so mad. Things just kept getting worse. My dad called and h-he was drunk out of his mind. He said that I was a… he said some pretty horrible things. When I got home my mom was being nice but then… I forgot to brush my teeth this morning and she could smell the alcohol."
Cartman let go of my head, my hat lopsided and my hair poking out from underneath.
"Because of our fight." He muttered.
"What?" I asked. "No I still probably wouldn't have remembered to brus-"
"What did she do?" he cut me off. I blinked and tried to think up a lie as quickly as I could, but Cartman was staring at my forehead. I instantly struggled to pull my hat down but he beat me to it, and instead, he tore it off. He stared at the gash in complete silence. I could almost feel the anger radiating from him, the pressure on my hip slacking a bit.
"Cartman…" I breathed. "Cartman just calm down."
"What did she do?" he asked again. "Don't play your sneaky Jew games with me. I'm fucking seriously- you better tell me the truth."
"…She said that if I wanted to become an alcoholic like my dad… then I should get started. And she made me drink an entire bottle of whiskey in front of her. …She smashed me in the head with it and I went upstairs to puke my guts out and I took the glass out of my head and I just decided to cut myself. It… It makes me feel better. Look, it was my fault for drinking at the sleepover anyway, alright? I… I was practically asking for it when I lied on top of being caught. But it doesn't matter now. I'm fine." I tried to assure him, putting a hand on his shoulder. He stared at my hand and shrugged it off angrily.
"Why the fuck does everyone I love have to be a GOD DAMN MARTYR?!" he snarled. I blinked at him.
…what?
"You sound just like my fucking MOM! You both get the shit beat out of you and instead of standing up for yourself and having some GOD DAMN FUCKING SELF RESPECT you take it like a PUSSY ASS BITCH and say you're FINE and not to fucking worry. Well earth to the fucking JEWRAT! You're NOT FINE! Just LOOK AT YOURSELF!" he spun me around in front of the mirror. I swallowed and stared at me mostly naked reflection. I tried to do as he told me and examined all of the wounds that decorated my body; from my healing rib to my infected arms to the gash on my forehead. I stared at them, but I still didn't care what I looked like. It didn't matter. None of it mattered to me. Because I couldn't stop hearing his words in my head.
Everyone he loves? Everyone he loves? Cartman? Love?
"…You don't hate me?" I whispered, turning to look at him. He seemed to be surprised at that and his face reddened. Cartman was blushing.
"Of… O-Of course I fucking hate you!" he snapped, pushing me back and sitting me on the tub once more. He removed the towel from my hip, satisfied that the bleeding had stopped. He grabbed some antibiotics and peroxide from my cabinet. "Why the hell wouldn't I?"
I looked down at him as he brought the stuff over and kneeled once more. I couldn't help but smirk at the sight of him kneeling before me. His face flushed at my smirk and he blinked a few times.
"Don't get used to this, kike. Wipe that fucking smile off your ginger face before I tear it off!"
"What happened to your eye?" I changed the subject. He shrugged and poured some peroxide on the towel.
"Kenny punched me because I was being an asshole. Why the fuck do you care?" he asked lining up the towel with the cuts on my left arm.
"I don't know. I just do."
He shot his head up, meeting my gaze. He smiled a bit at hearing his own words being used against him. My blush darkened and I felt it this time. It was really hard to ignore. Then a searing pain ripped through my body. I started to scream, but Cartman shoved his hand over my mouth. I was almost blinded by the pain in my arm. So much for the numbness lasting as long as before. I couldn't help the pained whimpers and groans that came from my mouth.
"Ay! This is your own goddamn fault! So shut the fuck up and take it!" he yelled. I fought back the tears and shook my head stubbornly. Cartman rolled his eyes. "It's just peroxide asshole. Stop being such a goddamn pussy!"
I shoved his hand away from my mouth.
"Shut up Cartman!" I exclaimed. "I am not a pussy!"
"Oh yes you are. You're the biggest fucking pussy I know, Kahl. Don't deny who you are deep inside in that sandy ass vagina." He snickered and moved on to the next arm. I cried out pathetically, but tried holding my breath. I got through it, but when he poured the peroxide over my hip… I almost blacked out. Cartman held me steady until the agonizing sizzling came to an end. He started to rub the antibiotics into my hip. My breath hitched at his gentle touch and he smirked as I closed my eyes.
"I… I'll prove that I'm not a pussy… stupid fatass…" I managed to get out as his warm hand moved in circular motions around the incision I made closest to my chest.
"Oh yeah? Wanna make a bet, Jew?" he asked, lowering his slimy hand to the second cut. I bit my lip, face flooding with color. Moses that felt good.
Don't get a boner. Don't get a boner.
"W-What kind of… of bet…?" I whispered opening my eyes and not looking down at his magical hand. He had that stupid smirk on his face, but for some reason I didn't mind it this time. I couldn't tear my eyes.
"Whoever cries in front of the other person first loses the bet. The victor gets…" Cartman lowered his voice dramatically. "…Ten dollars."
"You're on fatass. There's no way I'm going to lose that kind of b-…" I trailed off as he glazed his fingers across the third cut. It was right next to my crotch and he made sure to pause when he got there. I held my breath. His eyes filled with mischief and… something else I couldn't quite figure out. But it was fucking hot.
"…What's the matter Kaahhhl?" he purred with a slight chuckle. "You're all flustered…"
"I… just…" I tried to fight against the heat that flooded into my groin. Cartman raised his eyebrow as if intrigued, and continued to rub in the antibiotic slowly and dangerously close to my crotch. He brushed past my inner thigh and I hissed under my breath, gripping the tub. He let his index finger trail up and down my hip, teasing me. A quiet moan escaped my throat before I could stop it. Both of my hands covered my mouth and I felt my face get beet red.
"Well well well… Is that a flagpole in your boxers or are you just happy to see me?" he asked, pursing his lips. I squeaked in embarrassment and tried to cross my legs, but he pushed it back down. I didn't mind his hand on my knee at all…
Fuck…
"I need to do your arms." Cartman said quietly. I hesitantly allowed my hands to leave my face and presented my arms to him. He rubbed the antibiotic into the many cuts that decorated my arms. I recognized how focused his face was from that time we were in math class. I heard Cartman chuckle, never looking up. "You're staring at me again."
"W-…Well where the fuck am I supposed to look?" I demanded quietly. He didn't answer that. Instead he shot me an amused smile. I felt my heart drop into my stomach.
Damn his cute smiles…
He grabbed some gauze and began to wrap my arms carefully. Then he took the peroxide soaked towel and reached over to clean the gash in my head. The pain stung through my scalp and my eyes watered, but I squeezed my eyes shut. I would NOT lose this bet.
"Won't be long before I get that ten dollars, Kahl." He said in his gloating voice. I groaned from under him as he rubbed the antibiotic into my scalp. I let my head lean into his chest and he froze for a moment, but then resumed what he was doing. I took that as permission. It felt nice to lean into him. It was really warm and comforting. I listened to his heartbeat in an attempt to tune out the world.
Bu-bump
Bu-bump
Bu-bump
I smirked to myself. It was beating so fast. I took in his scent and exhaled content for the first time in what seemed like forever. I silently wished that time would stop.
"You've been through a lot." He said quietly, dabbing at the wound on my head. I said nothing. I just let myself breathe. He took that as permission to continue. "…If you don't get your mom some help, she's not going to stop. She's just going to get worse. Take my mom for example. I wanted to tell her to stop prostituting for years, but I didn't. Now look at what happened. …Part of me is glad it did because it was a wake-up call for me. Now I'm going to get a job until she's better and then I'm going to help her get a job."
"…I'm glad." I murmured into his jacket. He moved away and helped me up, grabbing my pajamas that were hanging on the back of the door behind him. He handed them to me and I took them, pulling the pants on carefully.
"That's not the point, Kyle." He said. I froze.
"…Did you just call me Kyle?" I asked. "…Kyle? Not Kahhl?"
"Ugh yeah because I'm being totally seriously and I need you to actually listen. Jesus tap-dancing Christ, Kahl." He replied. I pulled on the shirt and started to button it up, my eyes never leaving his.
"O-okay then… I'm listening Eric." I smirked. He glared at me, unlocking the bathroom door and rolling his eyes.
"Don't call me that. You're not allowed to." He said. I laughed, following him out of the bathroom and into my room. He watched as I sat on my bed and sat next to me.
"My point is that I thought my opinion didn't matter when it came to her and that I was stupid for even caring. So I stayed out of her way and she almost died. In your case, you're going to let her walk all over you until the people you want to get help from aren't that busy. And that is total bullshit, alright? Ike would want to know what the fuck was happening to you here. And your dad was drunk off of his fucking yamakah and would probably explain himself if you gave him the chance to. …You know when he's not fucking smashed." Cartman went on. "I'm not going to sit back and watch you break in half. You need to stand up for yourself and stop being a pussy whipped ginger Jew from jersey!"
I was blown away.
"…Cartman… thanks for saying that. I didn't realize you cared so much." I murmured. He scoffed.
"Psh I don't you stupid asshole. If you become a masochistic emo piece of shit, how the fuck could I keep ripping on you all the time? You just be all like, 'aww yeah Cartman you're right… I am a stupid ginger asshole.' And where's the fun in that?"
"Shut up fatass!" I snapped. He grinned happily at that, but covered my mouth with his hand which I slapped away.
"Shut up she'll hear us daywalker."
"Then stop pissing me off asshole!" I whispered.
"OH. And the next time you cut yourself or don't fucking contact me, I will kick you square in the nuts. You got that kike?"
"Don't call me a kike!" I hissed under my breath.
"Kike. Kike kike kike kike KIKE!" he exclaimed quietly so we wouldn't be heard. I felt my face heat up with anger.
"SHUT YOU-" I started to scream, but he cut me off with his lips. I forgot how to breathe. Both of his hands held my face to his and tangled in my hair. At first I just remained frozen in shock, but then I gave into my feelings and melted into his kiss. This kiss was so much better than the one I was forced into earlier.
I felt a bead of sweat travel down my neck as I let my hands touch his chest in curiosity. I could feel his heartbeat pounding against my hands as his tongue brushed across my lips. I hesitated and felt him yank my head back by my hair. He pulled back a bit as I flinched.
"Open up Kahl…" he murmured against my mouth. I moaned with a wince as he tugged at my hair, opening my mouth. He took full advantage, pressing his mouth to mine once more. Instead of shoving his tongue down my throat like Bebe had, he gently slid it across my own. I sighed at the heavenly sensation, my body trembling as our tongues battled for dominance. Cartman's hands trailed down my neck and sides as he pushed me into the bed, his hard-on pressing into my thigh.
Fuck…
And then my mom knocked on the door.
We both stopped immediately and sat up, staring at the door. My heart was racing so fast, I thought it would explode. I looked at Cartman wide eyed.
"Bubbula?" She asked, her voice soft. "Can Mommy talk to you for a second?"
Cartman nodded at me.
"Y-yeah Mom just uh… just gimme a second." I replied, my eyes still burning into his. Cartman smiled at me and stroked my cheek with his knuckle.
"I'll see you at the bus stop." He whispered and climbed out of the window. I watched him leave and closed it, sighing sadly. My mom knocked on the door again as I closed the blinds and got up.
I answered the door and she smiled at me. An actual genuine smile. I blinked in confusion.
"Bubbe? You know how much I love you right?" she asked, gently tracing her fingers over the gash on my head.
"I love you too. I'm sorry I've been stressing you out so much Mom." I replied. She led me to my bed and sat me down. I could have sworn I saw her tear up.
"I know you are. And… a lot is going through my mind bubbula. I can't really make sense of it all. I'm just so sorry for lashing out at you like I have. I'm going to fix this. I'm going to fix everything. I just need you to trust that I know what's best for you as your mother." She said.
"Sure mom…" I muttered and she kissed my forehead.
"Your group presentation is tomorrow right? I know you'll do amazingly." She gushed tucking me in. "My son is the smartest boy in that school."
"Thanks mom." I replied, trying not to look at her strangely. She kissed my forehead once more and turned off my light.
"Sweet dreams. Mommy loves you, Ike."
She closed the door and I stared at the ceiling.
She thinks I'm Ike now?
I squeezed my eyes shut and felt tears leak down my cheeks. Thank moses Cartman wasn't here to see. I froze the second his face popped into my head. All other thoughts faded away as I smiled, remembering.
Cartman… Kissed me…