Hey everyone! Here's a new update. This is a very Murphy/Tyler centric chapter, that focuses on the development of their relationship and how it moves from a high school romance to a marriage. Next chapter will have some magic and some more history for those of you who like that. I'm thinking of doing a few fun outtakes that take place in this time frame if I can. One about the fight Reid and Tyler have, and one about the horrors of shopping for dresses. The next chapter will probably come faster because I'm really looking forward to it.

The song for this chapter is Push Away by Versant. There's a link in my profile.

Thanks to all the reviews and those of you who faved, it means a lot!

Chapter 19

On Our Own Time

I called Tyler the next morning, but he didn't answer. It wasn't that big of a deal, I would just see him in class later. I grabbed my uniform from my closet and threw it on. After all that had been happening lately, school seemed like a bad joke; I was glad it was the last week of class; I was ready to grow up.

When I arrived at the usual table for breakfast that morning, Tyler wasn't there.

"Have you seen Tyler?" I asked Reid as I lowered myself into the seat next to him. None of the other girls knew about the Book of Ascension yet, so I kept my voice low.

"He didn't come back to the room last night and he won't return my calls," Reid said. "I think he's just pissed at us."

"You're probably right," I sighed.

"Can you do me a favor?" I asked Caleb as we headed off to class.

"Yeah sure. What do you need?"

"Can you text Tyler and ask where he is, or if he's coming to school or something? He won't answer my calls because he's mad at me, but you might have better luck."

"No problem," Caleb said, taking out his phone. "He'll get over it. Don't worry," he assured.

"I know, but it still sucks."

Tyler didn't show up for school that day, and I got the hint that he wasn't ready to talk yet. He had every right to be mad at me for invading his privacy, but I thought this was a bit theatrical, especially for him. He showed up for school the next day, but he pretty much ignored me, which didn't go unnoticed. Sarah, Kate, and Allison were having trouble believing that we were fighting over wedding details, and I didn't really have it in me to lie to them. By the end of the week, they all knew as much as I did about the missing book and I felt a little better about it. On Thursday, Tyler spoke to me for what felt like the first time in forever.

"I know this is hard on you," he started, pulling me aside after class, "But I'm really not ready to talk about it yet."

"Tyler, we need to talk about this. Soon. It's been a week," I reasoned. I couldn't understand why he would need this much time to think things through. We weren't going to break up or anything, I was certain of that, but him not speaking to me was getting old. As much as I wanted to give him time and be sympathetic of his feelings, I was growing impatient.

"It will be soon, just not now." I opened my mouth to protest again, but he was walking away before I could get the words out. All I wanted to do was apologize and move on. Maybe he knew that I wasn't really sorry for what I did. I was only sorry that it hurt him.

I had almost reached my wits end by the end of school on Friday. Everyone was in a generally happy mood because it was the last day of classes for seniors, but I didn't feel much like celebrating. I was annoyed at this point. We had a wedding to plan. Being married meant that we were supposed to talk about our problems and solve them together.

Throwing open the door to my dorm room, I looked around at the heaps of boxes stacked all around. I didn't know what to do with all of them. They were supposed to be moved to Tyler's house and stored there until we moved into the city for school, but so far that hadn't happened. There were only a few days left until I had to leave the dorms, but with Tyler not speaking to me, I didn't have anywhere else to go.

Frustrated, I opened the box where I'd packed my workout clothes a few days before. I rummaged through the contents, not really caring that I was making a mess. Pulling out a pair of running shorts and a Nike tank-top, I changed. I grabbed my armband and strapped my iPhone to my arm, jamming the headphones in my ears. I threw my long blond hair into a ponytail and put my old Red Sox hat on my head for good measure.

The only thing I could think to do was run. The trails behind the athletic fields were finally clear of the over flow from the reservoir because of the harsh winter and new green leaves were starting to grow on the trees. Despite myself, I was happy to be outside

I started running without a destination in mind. I would run all night if I could, keeping my thoughts in a neat line. The movement calmed me, and made me feel like I was making progress even though I was only in the woods. Music blared as I picked up the pace, running through puddles and not caring that there was mud splattering up my legs.

I just wanted this to be over. Even though Tyler was sick, it would make me happy just to be able to talk to him, to hold him again. I pumped my arms faster as a hill came into view, and started the mile and a half climb up to the highest point in Ipswich. I hadn't spent this much time away from him since Fall Fest and it was really bothering me. I would be mad at him if I didn't miss him so much. I knew I was wrong, so why couldn't he just forgive me?

I made it to the top of the hill and paused by the foundation of an old mansion that once belonged to the Garwin family. My phone buzzed and I ripped it out of my arm band quickly. Tyler's face popped up on the screen. I'd caught him off guard with my camera and he looked so ridiculous that I couldn't help but smile when I saw the picture, no matter how upset I was with him. He didn't even ask me to delete it, knowing how much it made me smile. I waited for the phone to buzz a few times before I answered, so I wouldn't seem too eager.

"Hello?" I answered, like I didn't know who it was.

"What are you doing?" he asked. His voice was a little strained, but he didn't sound angry anymore.

"I'm just out for a run," I answered, pacing around in the sun.

"Can you come over? My parents are out and we need to talk." It would take over an hour to run back to campus, shower, and drive over to his house and frankly, I didn't want to wait that long. I was closer to his house than I was to campus anyway.

"I'll be there in fifteen." I answered before hanging up. I didn't want to talk to him over the phone anymore.

I continued on a path, opposite of the one I came up on, taking me down the other side of the hill and toward Tyler's. I couldn't help but run at a near race pace. Whether we got into another fight or we made up, I just wanted to speak to him. Fifteen minutes later, I jogged out of the woods across the street from the Simm's property. I paused, catching my breath, before walking up the long driveway. My impatience got the best of me and I started to jog up the long driveway. I saw movement in the front room, and then the front door opened and Tyler stood in the doorway. His eyes softened when he saw me, and I knew then that I was forgiven. Without hesitation, I climbed the front steps and threw myself into his arms.

He backed up into the house and he put his arms around me, lifting me up. I wrapped my legs around his torso, not caring that I was sweaty or that I was getting mud all over him. I pressed my lips to his aggressively, running my hands through his hair, as he pressed me against the wall. We were letting the horny teenage parts of ourselves get the first say, but I couldn't really find anything wrong with that. It was bliss, a perfect relief for all of the tension that had been building through the week.

He broke the kiss and pressed his forehead to mine, lowering me so my feet touched the floor.

"Hi," he said softly.

"Hey," I exhaled, letting a smile take over my face.

"You know you're not getting off that easy, right?" he asked even though he was smiling too.

"I know, but it felt good." He laughed in agreement and stepped away from me, taking my hand and leading me through the house and out to the back patio. We sat on a love seat by the pool and I leaned into him, looking into the water, imagining how wonderful it would feel against my skin. We sat in silence for a few moments.

"You do know how sorry I am, right?" I asked even though I already knew the answer. He'd said as much last weekend, but we needed to start somewhere.

"I know." He leaned away so he could look me in the eyes. "You just have to understand."

"Understand what?" I asked trying to keep the frustration out of my voice. I pulled away from him further, turning my body to face him on the seat, and crossing my legs in front of me. "I know what I did was wrong, but you know why I did it. Can you really blame me for trying?" I defended. By the look on his face, I knew it was the wrong thing to say, but I didn't want to take it back.

"It's not about motives. I asked you not to because it's bad. The power is bad and that's the only way I can see it. It's like being born with a drug addiction that you can never escape. Not only do I have to deal with this, but so do my brothers and my father and my son one day. My mother even has her nose in it, and it bothers me. You are the only thing in my life that is free and happy. Even with everything going on, you were still outside of it all, helping me in the only way I wanted to be helped. You were there for me and that's all I wanted." He paused, meeting my eyes and I couldn't deny the pain that was there.

"I know what you were trying to do and I know I can't be mad at you for caring about me, but I still don't want you to be tainted by the curse. There really isn't anything that can be done. If there was, the boys would have done it already. Without you."

"But we found something important. There's a book missing. Doesn't that count for something?" I argued.

"Not to me. There is nothing we could learn from that book that would make any difference. It's been gone for hundreds of years and we've gotten on just fine without it."

"Aren't you curious?" I asked. I couldn't wrap my head around his reasoning. If there was more information, why didn't he want to know it?

"To be honest, it's hard for me to be curious about anything at this point." His words were like a stab to my heart. Of course I couldn't understand him. None of us could because none of us were dying.

"I understand what you mean, but I can't accept it. We'll have a son one day and you'll be gone before he turns thirteen. He'll have to go through all this without you, and he'll only have me. I need to know everything that you know so I can be prepared for when he comes asking me questions." It was hard to say out loud, but there was no way to tread around it this time.

"He'll have Reid, Caleb and Pogue," Tyler countered.

"Yeah, and that'll be great, but he'll need me too. He'll be the first and he won't have what you had. None of the others are trying to get knocked up just yet as far as I know." Tyler inhaled sharply and I remembered that I'd never actually told him about the conversation I had with his father, or the fact that I was no longer on birth control. He knew it, but it still made him uncomfortable.

"The more we talk about this, the less fair it seems," he said, his face falling as he took my hands in his. "This whole Book of Ascension thing really just put me over the edge. This is so fucked up, Murph. You know that right? Life shouldn't have to be this complicated. We should be having the time of our lives right now, not planning a wedding, a birth and a funeral."

"Look," I said, taking his face in my hands and stroking my thumb across his cheek. "I love you and this is our life. We have to make it work, or what else is there?" He sighed again, leaning closer to me, closing his eyes.

"I'll let you be involved in the book thing, but promise me, no more secrets. It's not like you can get to the books without me anyway."

"I can always get Reid to help me again," I countered lightly.

"Reid won't be helping you with anything anymore. Trust me." He let out a small laugh at a memory that I could only imagine had something to do with the black eye Reid had been sporting the past few days. When I asked about it, he started in on some graphic detail of his and Allison's sex life, but I cut him off; I didn't believe him anyway. "Promise me, we'll do this together from now on?"

"I promise," I said, moving my face closer to his and sealing my promise with a kiss. He smiled against my lips, before pulling away.

"We have a wedding to plan, and I'm pretty sure my mom wouldn't be too happy with all the mud you'll track into the house." I rolled my eyes at him, eying the water again.

"You just want to see me naked," I said, while he shrugged his shoulders.

I stood up, and jumped into the water, fully clothed, making sure to splash him on the way in. The water was colder than I expected, but it felt better than I could have imagined. I stayed under water for a few seconds, letting the mud wash away. I swam toward the stairs before surfacing.

When I climbed the stairs, Tyler was waiting for me with a towel from the pool house. I took off my wet tank top and shorts, aiming them at Tyler. He dodged them gracefully. I exited the pool in my bra and underwear and he wrapped the towel around my shoulders as we headed toward to house. I left my clothes outside, letting them dry in the late afternoon sun.

I entered the house and he reached to close the sliding door behind him, turning to me with a mischievous smile on his face. I knew that smile all to well and I had to admit that it made my knees go weak. He crossed the room to where I was leaning against the bar with the towel wrapped under my arms. Putting his hands on my waist, he pulled me closer, taking my bottom lip in his, and kissing me slowly. I was so frustrated with him, I forgot how much I missed touching him.

He moved from my mouth, to my cheek and kissed his way across my jaw, to my ear, and down my neck, just the way I liked it. I pulled him closer, running my hands through his hair, tugging on it lightly. My towel dropped to the floor as his hands ran up and down my sides, lightly grazing my ribcage. Without warning, he took my by the hips and lifted me onto the bar. I let out a laugh and wrapped my legs around his waist, pulling him to me, giggling into his ear like a schoolgirl. Things were about to get heated, when we heard the tell-tale sound of a car in the driveway. Rose was back.

My legs loosened around him and dropped against the counter. Tyler groaned and rested his head on my collarbone in defeat.

"Perfect timing," he mumbled against my skin, placing one last kiss on my neck before pulling away. I slid off the bar, picking the towel up off the floor and wrapping it around me. I darted outside, and picked up my now damp clothes and pulling them on quickly. I reentered the house and sat down at the table before Rose entered the house. Of course she knew that we were intimate, but it was still awkward to be caught in a compromising position, so we avoided it at all costs.

Tyler had the wedding planing stuff spread out in the table and I pulled the folders and catalogs toward me as Rose rounded the corner.

"Murphy!" she exclaimed, walking over to my chair and squeezing my shoulders warmly. "I haven't seen you in a while. Is everything sorted?" She knew that Tyler and I had a fight and what it was about. He shared a lot of things with her, and she wasn't one to buy into the 'disagreement over wedding details' excuse we'd been peddling to everyone else.

"It's fine," I answered grabbing Tyler's hand across the table, catching his eye. Rose nodded and patted my shoulders one last time before heading into the kitchen.

"This is impossible." Tyler looked up from the brochure he was looking at, shaking his head. "I really don't know what I'm looking for."

"Just get rid of the ones you don't like, and go from there," I suggested.

"That's the thing, they're all just big old mansions, that happen to look a lot like this big old mansion," he said, gesturing to the house around him.

"Wait!, I exclaimed, excitedly. "I think that's the best idea you've ever had."

"What?" he asked, confused.

"Yes! If we have it here, we won't have to worry about booking a place with such short notice," I reasoned. Now our wedding had a backyard theme. Rose and I had thrown a lot of ideas around, but nothing seemed as perfect and intimate as a backyard wedding.

"But it's, like, May," Tyler stated, confused. "The last I heard, we were getting married in August."

"Yeah, in the wedding world, that's short notice," I explained. He shrugged.

"Hey, Mom?" he called through the arched doorway into the kitchen.

"Yes?" she answered, walking into the dining room.

"Do you think we could have the wedding here?" I asked. "I mean, all the places we've been looking at are old historical mansions, so Tyler suggested that we just have it here."

"I was actually kidding," Tyler said, not wanting to take too much credit for the venue. I waved him off.

"That's a wonderful idea!" Rose said, clapping her hands together. "I'll call the landscaper, now." She rushed out of the dining room and into the office to make the call.

I closed the brochure I was looking through and walked around to Tyler's side of the table. Wrapping my arms around him, I folded myself onto his lap.

"Did I tell you how much I love you today?" I whispered against the skin of his neck.

"I think you did, but I don't mind hearing it again," he pulled me closer and kissed me lightly on the lips. "But I think I'm all set with the wedding planning." I smiled.

"Are you sure? I could really use your help with fabric for the bridesmaid's dresses." He cringed and I laughed.

"Give me a lift back to school?" I asked, standing up. Rose had just hung up with the landscaper in the other room.

"Sure," he said, following me out the door. "Do you still want to go to the Dells later?" The traditional senior send-off party was tonight at the Dells. The underclassmen paid for all the booze and had to do everything the seniors said for the entire night, including being a distraction for the cops,

"Yeah, but I really need to shower before this thing," I said, fingering the strands of my hair that had long since fallen out of my ponytail.

"I'll come get you at your room later?" Tyler asked as we pulled up to the dorms.

"We're all gonna meet you guys there." Tyler looked at me funny. "I wasn't sure if you'd be speaking to me or not at this point so I made alternative plans." I had been looking forward to this party since freshmen year and I wasn't going to miss it on Tyler's account. He rolled his eyes and kissed me lightly as I got out of the car. After a quick shower, I ran over to Kate's room to finish getting ready. Sarah had been harassing me via text message since the middle of the afternoon, wondering when I would be back so we could all get ready together.

"I'm here!" I yelled, throwing open the door, skidding to a halt in the middle of the room.

"Finally!" Allison crossed the room, pushing me down into a chair in front of the vanity. The three of them were already in full hair and makeup, while I still looked like a drowned rat.

Allison started on my hair with the blow-dryer, while Kate started putting foundation on my face.

"Where were you?" Sarah asked. "I was ready to call out a search party."

"I was with Tyler," I confessed.

"Did you guys work out that wedding thing?" Sarah asked. There was something in her voice that said she didn't believe me, but she didn't push it.

"Yeah. We decided that we're having the wedding at his house." I technically wasn't lying, and I wanted to direct the subject away from fighting, so wedding details made for a smooth transition.

"That's so cool!" Kate said, lifting my chin so she could blend the makeup.

"What about the bridal party?" Allison asked.

"And you can't forget about the bachelorette party," Sarah added. "I have a few ideas that I think you'll love."

"You guys are obviously the bridal party, so get ready to try on a million ugly dresses," I joked, closing my eyes as Allison sprayed my pinned hair.

"You wouldn't dare," Kate countered. I giggled, and she held my chin firmly as she applied eyeliner to my upper lid.

"I can't believe we're graduating on Sunday," Allison commented. "And you and Tyler are getting married. Next thing we know you'll be pregnant." My body gave an involuntary nervous jolt, causing Allison to burn me with the straightener. "Ow," I reached up to grab my neck.

"Whoa, whoa. Hold on a second," Sarah said, putting down the magazine she was flipping through, giving me her full attention.

"You're not pregnant are you?" It was impossible to tell by her tone if she would have scolded me, or squealed with excitement if I told her I was, which I wasn't.

"Of course not," I assured. Allison caught me off guard with her comment. I hadn't exactly shared my intentions with them; it was a delicate subject. "I mean, I hope to be, someday." A sudden sadness crept into the air. It was easy to forget just how sick Tyler was sometimes because it didn't show. I hadn't thought about what my life will be like once he's gone. Would I ever meet someone else? Would I even want to? In their minds, I would probably never have children and their pity was palpable.

"It won't be a shotgun wedding," I said in an attempt to lighten the mood. "I think the scandal would upset the entire Spencer ecosystem." Kate let out a chuckle, which allowed me to exhale.

"I think you would skew the teen pregnancy statistic for the next ten years," Kate joked, cracking us up. She finished with my makeup and I stood up, adjusting my jean shorts and cream colored lace top.

"Ready?" I asked, grabbing my brown leather sandals and strapping them to my feet.

"Ready!" Sarah replied as they followed me out the door.

The Dells was packed by the time we got there. The music was loud and the underclassmen were running around, hands full of cups, smile despite their lowly circumstances. I grabbed one of my sophomore cross country teammates by the arm as she passed.

"Do you mind?" I asked, gesturing to my friends.

"No problem!" she said, rushing off toward the keg.

"Don't drink too much," I told her as she handed us each a red solo cup. "We're going to need someone to drive us home later."

"Sure thing!" she said, rushing off to help someone else.

"You're bad," Allison said, hitting her cup against mine and taking a sip.

"What else can we make them do?" Sarah asked, looking around. It looked like the baseball team was on fire duty, throwing wood onto the already huge bonfire. Across the clearing, Aaron Abbot was using a puny freshman as a foot rest.

"It looks like we can do anything we want," I answered. "Last year, Veronica Bergson made me trade shoes with her. Then her best friend Carly insisted that she needed to uses my car because she felt sick and had to leave, when really, she was screwing Veronica's boyfriend in the back seat."

"Ew!" Sarah yelled, giving me a light shove. "I was just sitting in there!" I shrugged, smiling as I took another sip of my drink. I craned my neck looking for Tyler and the others, and saw four figures walking toward the party from the cliffs.

"There they are." Allison waved them over. Reid gave her a nod, and grabbed a passing junior by the back of the neck and ordering him to do something.

"Hey," Tyler said, coming over and kissing me.

"I missed you," I replied cheesily. He knew I didn't mean from when I'd last seen him a few hours ago. I'd really missed him over the past week, but it was okay because I knew that I could see him if I really needed to, but it hurt because what will I do when I can't burst into his dorm room, or come home and see him. I shook the thought from my mind and let myself cuddle into him.

"I missed you to," he whispered. "I'll always miss you." I hugged him tighter, squeezing my eyes shut against the single tear that threatened to fall. Our moment was thankfully interrupted by Pogue.

"Hey!" he yelled. "It's time for shots!" Sarah whooped and Caleb chuckled as we followed him over to the shots table.

The night was perfect to say the least. The fire was bright, the breeze was warm, and I felt a sense of comradery towards my classmates that I hadn't felt in years. It was bitter-sweet. I even played a game of beer pong with Keira, and we even shared a few high-fives. The night was filled with so much laughter and dancing and love, it was hard not to feel perfectly at ease. But all good things come to an end. Eventually the fire burned out and we had to grow up.

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