DISCLAIMERS: I DO NOT OWN 'INUYASHA'! THAT HONOR IS HELD BY RUMIKO TAKAHASHI!
"The Right Choice"
Warnings: Language, mild violence, Inucest, YAOI (boyxboy) Don't like boy-love? Don't read :)
Some ooc, on purpose!
THIS IS RATED M FOR A REASON!
A/N I have discovered that this story has been getting viewed/visited by people in many different countries, which blows my mind! It's awesome that it's getting such coverage, so I want to say 'Thank you' to everyone that's checking it out!
Warnings-Sesshomaru in pain (it was his first time, after all) Some angst because of a deeply insecure Inuyasha and that's about it!
Ah one of my lovely reviewers did ask a good question. 'Will Kagome hate that they're mated?' Well, this story does not go back to the pack, but for the sake of closure, let's say that Sango explained the demon-mating thing to the group, and everyone is just happy that Inuyasha is happy. I hope this works, cause I did not write any more pack scenes for this fic. Some of the other stories I've written (not posted yet) will show reactions from their packs.
Chapter 10: Pain and Angst
Previously on 'The Right Choice': "It's beautiful. It's a part of you, and it means you're mine. It's perfect."
Inuyasha feathered his lips over the Mark, then along his brother's throat, getting a pleased little shiver in response. He smiled and tilted his head to look his mate in the eyes as he spoke softly.
"Aniki, do you know what I meant when I said you were gonna Mark me, too?"
The demon shrugged, looking curious and a bit confused.
Inuyasha grinned, watching the demon's amber eyes as he murmured. "I meant that you will take me, big brother. You were born to be a dominant, and I want to see how you do when that particular instinct is indulged. Are you interested, aniki?"
Slowly, his mate nodded, watching him with wide eyes. Then the youkai smirked. "While you're buried in me is a strange time to ask if I want to take you."
Inuyasha laughed at the observation. "Yeah, I guess it is. Strange timing aside, are you ready for your turn, or would you rather bathe first?"
He followed his mate's gaze down; they were both a hot mess. The older male smiled. "Bath first."
xxxxx
They untangled, Sesshomaru getting off his brother's lap. The demon went to stand up, only to collapse onto all fours as sharp pain shot through the lower half of his body.
Instantly, his mate was at his side, asking anxiously. "What's wrong?"
Sesshomaru gasped. "My body hurts." It felt like lightning was striking his hips and lower back.
He heard a whine of apology from his Alpha. "Shit, I'm sorry! I forgot about this part. Your body hurts cause it was your first time. It won't last long, I promise. It'd be worse if we hadn't prepared first."
xxxxx
Inuyasha scooped up his brother as gently as he could and carried him to the water. He carefully stepped in and sat down, holding his mate on his lap. Sesshomaru was trembling and whimpering, even though it was obvious he was trying not to.
Inuyasha held the youkai against him gently with one arm, using the other hand to caress as much of the demon as he could reach, trying to ease away the pain. He rubbed his lover's hips and lower back, alternating between gentle caresses and firm strokes. It seemed to be helping; after a few moments, Sesshomaru had stopped trembling and his whimpers of pain had faded into a barely audible whine of discomfort.
Inuyasha was dealing with his guilt at causing the demon lord MORE pain, and he hadn't even warned his mate about this one! He felt like a complete bastard. He sighed as he mentally bitched himself out for not being the kind of mate Sesshomaru deserved.
He felt the demon stir in his arms, and he glanced down to see concern in the luminous golden eyes that were gazing up at him. His brother asked softly. "What's wrong, otouto?"
Inuyasha raised his eyebrows. "I hurt you repeatedly, and you're asking me what's wrong?!"
Sesshomaru shrugged, still watching him with concern. "I could feel that you were upset. I had this urge to fix whatever was wrong with you."
Inuyasha sighed and tightened his arm around his selfless mate as he murmured. "I'm fine, honey. I'm just upset that I seem to keep hurting you. I'm so sorry, and I don't want to cause you any more pain." He continued rubbing his lover's hips and lower back, knowing that was where most of the pain would be.
Sesshomaru gave a relieved-sounding sigh and snuggled closer to his chest in the water. "I'm feeling better, little brother. Don't feel bad; after all, how many times have I hurt you? Could we get out of the water now?"
Inuyasha felt a smile curving his lips at the demon's diversionary tactics. "Yeah, but I think we need to actually try to get clean while we're in here."
They began their first mate-grooming ritual, taking turns tenderly cleaning every inch of each other's bodies. When they were both clean, they got out of the water, Inuyasha supporting the youkai in case the pain came back. They moved to lay on the blanket, which was surprisingly clean after all their dirty activities.
Inuyasha watched as Sesshomaru laid on his back and held out one hand to him. Inuyasha laid with his head on his big brother's shoulder, snuggling his body tightly against his side. He felt the demon rest his cheek on top of his head between his ears, and a clawed hand gently ran over his back. The youkai lifted his other hand, holding it up.
Inuyasha lifted his own hand to his brother and mate's. Palm-to-palm, they interlaced their fingers smoothly as if they'd been doing it for years. In comfortable, natural silence, they gazed at their joined hands. Without conciously realizing it, both of them were making that deep, contented rumble in their chests as their thumbs gently stroked each other's hands.
Sesshomaru moved the hand behind the hanyou's back to grab the end of his fluff, pulling it over the bottom half of their bodies as the night air cooled and a breeze picked up.
Inuyasha tilted his head so he gazed up at his mate without moving his head from his spot on the youkai's shoulder. His brother's warm amber eyes met his own. "Yes, otouto?" the demon asked.
Inuyasha whispered. "Thank you."
The older male raised an eyebrow, obviously not understanding why he was being thanked. Inuyasha continued speaking quietly, watching those honey eyes.
"For not leaving when I got here, both when I arrived this afternoon, and when I first came to the pool."
He watched as Sesshomaru took a deep breath and smiled at him. "I wanted to, actually. Both times, I was terrified. This afternoon, I was afraid you'd want to fight or get revenge while I was weakened. It was a perfect opportunity to punish me for my words and actions over the years. When you came to the pool, I...I was afraid you would try to claim me against my will. I would not have been able to stop you, little brother, and it was another chance to hurt me. At the same time, I...I was afraid you'd be disgusted or offended by the idea of mating with your brother, much less one who has treated you the way I have; I was afraid of that because my heat would have destroyed me. Both times, I wanted to run, and both times, I was too weak. But I am glad I was too weak to run."
Inuyasha was absorbing the shock that his reserved brother could talk that much as the arm around his waist and the hand holding his both tightened. The demon leaned close, and soft lips touched his forehead.
When his mate pulled away, he stared at the older male, who asked. "What? Why are you looking at me like that?"
Inuyasha replied quietly as his mind whirled. "Well, first of all, that has got to be the most I've ever heard you speak at one time. Second, you should know you're not the only one who's been afraid. I was scared you'd leave. I...I was afraid I'd killed you when my demon blood came out. I'm still afraid you'll remember that you hate me because I'm a filthy half-breed, and then you'll leave. I'd rather you kill me."
xxxxx
Sesshomaru became concerned at these words and his younger mate tried to pull his hand away. "Inuyasha?" He sensed fear and despair rising in his brother as he tried harder to get away. Sesshomaru kept his tight grip, unwilling to let his mate move away when there was obviously something seriously wrong with him.
The demon lord caught his breath as he scented tears, and he heard a small voice. "Please let me go."
Helplessly, he loosened his grip, giving a soft whine as his Alpha scooted away, not looking at him. "Inuyasha, what's wrong?" he whispered.
The hanyou turned to him with tears in his golden eyes, speaking in a frantic tone. "Nothing good in my life ever lasts, ever! Es-especially love! Mark or no Mark, you're gonna leave, and...and when we see each other again, you'll act like tonight never happened! It'll be like it always was, because you h-h-hate me!" The younger male had a desperate look in his teary amber eyes.
Sesshomaru stared at his mate in alarm; the pup seemed to be breaking down. He had never known Inuyasha felt like this, or that his treatment had affected his little brother so much.
"Inuyasha, I am not going to leave unless you wish me to do so." he said firmly as he sat up. "Have I really been that terrible to you that you think I would leave after all this?" He gestured to their surroundings, then to his neck, where he could feel his Mark pulsing in response to his mate's misery.
When Inuyasha shifted his eyes away and didn't answer, Sesshomaru felt his heart shatter. This amazing half-demon's spirit was broken...because of his foolishness.
He scooted closer to his brother, not missing the younger male's flinch. "Inuyasha, I have never actually hated you."
A very skeptical-looking Inuyasha turned to face him, disbelief written all over his features.
Sesshomaru sighed. "It's true. I've been jealous of you, pissed at you, and in love with you, but never hate, otouto."
He saw the velvety ears flick forward just as amber eyes widened, and he realized he'd let something slip. He nodded and spoke again. "You heard me right, little brother. Tonight is not the first time I've felt this way about you, it's just the first time I realized what it was. Over the years, I have worried about you, been proud of you, and been in love with you. I've loved you so much that I have dreams about you."
Inuyasha's shock seemed to fade. "How long?" he whispered.
Sesshomaru shrugged. "I'd say it really started around the time you were pinned to the tree. I used to come talk to you, and I kept hoping somehow you'd be freed. I can destroy an arrow of purification, but the priestess used an arrow of sealing. If I'd tried that, I could've killed you. You...you are the reason I have never mated, little brother. Nobody seemed right, then I met you. After you were released, I didn't want anyone else. No one could come close to you, yet my extremely foolish pride kept me from pursuing you. I became bitter, and I blamed you because I still didn't understand my feelings for you."
Sesshomaru watched as his mate moved just a little closer. "What about the fact I'm just half-demon?" the younger male asked in a small voice.
Sesshomaru gave a very undignified snort that he would later deny making. "I do not know a single full-blooded demon that could defeat you in a real fight, including myself. You're too damn stubborn, and contrary to any previous claim I have made, you are strong, Inuyasha. Stronger than anyone I have ever fought, and just so you know, I had a few fights with Father."
Sesshomaru watched as his brother's demeanor changed. The insecurity faded, and his Alpha began to smile. Inuyasha leaned close and kissed him, then settled down close to his side, nuzzling against his neck like the pleased pup he was.
Sessomaru smiled, then asked softly. "Inuyasha, do you still wish me to Mark you?"
The younger male smiled at him, murmuring. "More than anything, Sesshomaru. Do you still want to?"
Sesshomaru nodded, then said quietly. "But...I am even more worried about not pleasing you now than I was about disappointing you as a submissive. I want sooo badly to please you, but..I am not sure what to do."
He lowered his eyes, ashamed by his inexperience.
He felt Inuyasha shift closer against him, and heard the soft command. "Look at me, aniki."
He raised his eyes to meet his brother's amber gaze as his Alpha spoke reassuringly. "Relax. You have no idea how glad I am to be your first. You just do what feels good, let your instincts guide you. With what I know of your usual personality, you're probably a rough dominant, and I'm ready for that. Listen to your instincts, big brother. When it comes to mating, if it feels like the right thing to do, it's probably not a bad idea."
End of Ch 10: Pain and Angst
Alright, so now that this chappie is out of the way, the next one will be the last for 'The Right Choice'. I sincerely hope it is satisfying, as it is all I wrote for this fic.
I would like some information, either in a review or pm. Like I said before, I have other stories written in notebooks, but I do have to fine-tune them as I start posting them. The information I request from my lovely readers/reviewers/followers is to help the fine-tuning of all my future work.
EX: What's your favorite part of an 'encounter'?
Do you prefer sweet lovin, or does rougher stuff appeal to you more?
Besides the Inu-brothers, who else would you want to see? Or join them? ;)
Anything specific you look for in a yaoi story?
Stuff like that. All feedback will be collected by my plot kittens to help me fine-tune everything I write into purr-worthy fics that can be enjoyed by all my fellow freaks! All responses can be in a review or you can pm me if you don't want everyone knowing how much of a freak you are! ;) I'm a huge freak, so I ain't gonna judge!
(All feedback will also be used in future writing, as I intend to write for 'Bleach' and other fandoms in the future)
Oh and I have a poll on my profile about how you prefer fics to be written chapter-wise!
Thanks for reading this long-ass A/N!
Next time: The Finale of The Right Choice! Chapter 11: Sesshomaru's Turn
In which Sesshomaru gets to indulge his natural dominance, Inuyasha shares a secret, and they prove it is gonna be an equal relationship.