Disclaimer: I don't own BBC's Merlin or any of the characters or places mentioned within this FanFiction.
A/N: I'm so sorry this chapter is taking me so long, there are several moments so far where I had to debate with myself over. I think I need to find someone willing to talk about scenes with me, but I have no one I know of whom I could ask such advice from. One of my main concerns is the characters coming across out of character and I sincerely apologise if you feel that this happens at any point. I have tried my very best to ensure that it doesn't, I had to re-write one section four times as it just didn't fit with the character. If any of you would be willing to help me by talking through scenes I would be eternally great full, please just send me a private message. Anyway as an apology for taking so long here is what I have so far, I hope you enjoy this part of the chapter. Sorry again for the long wait, and apologies for this not being a full chapter.
Chapter 5: Lancelot (Part One)
The forest that boarders Camelot is a very peaceful place to be, Gaius has sent me into these trees in search of certain mushrooms and herbs for his potions. The journey into the woods was lovely, birds chirping from the trees all around as wildlife shifted in the distance. Light streams down through the high trees, tinting the world a golden green as I shuffle through the forest carefully placing each step. The forest is alive, I feel it breathe with me. Sighing, swaying as the magic that is the earth ripples against me. Taking a deep breath of the forest I continue on my quest.
The day was warm and I basked in the warm breeze filtering through my red long sleeved shirt, and across the bare skin of my neck. As I knew I'd be alone at least for the majority of the day upon entering the cover of the forest I'd loosened my chest bindings. Not wanting to remove them fully as I would need to tighten them again before returning into Camelot and the material of my shirts could be scratchy at times, so for convenience I left them wrapped loosely around me.
At the base of a tree ahead of me I spot a patch of mushrooms that Gaius had asked for their dark brown colour almost camouflaging them against the tree trunk. Placing the small woven basket Gaius had given me to place all the ingredients within down carefully next to the fungi. Squatting down I reached out and twisted the first mushroom from the ground, after inspecting it to ensure it looked healthy I dropped it into the basket. Turning slightly to my right I plucked another from the ground, bringing it to the basket I rubbed my other hand at the earth that had come with the mushroom.
A hiss echoes behind me, my head whipped to my right, dropping the mushroom into the basket as I did so. Twigs snapping I rose to my feet a breath rushing into my lungs as a creature turned onto a path heading straight for me. The bird looking creature the size of a horse spotted me, letting out a series of calls or hisses as it hurtled towards me. The creature whatever it was, quickly gained ground the space between us narrowing at a terrifying speed. For a moment I considered the magic spiralling under my skin, however not knowing what type of spell to use was a terrifying idea. The fear of using a spell only to find that the spell I'd chosen angered the beast, also as it grew ever closer I felt magic radiate from its being; whatever this creature was it was a creature of magic.
Not sparing a glance to the basket I turned and ran away from the mass that bounded ever closer. Glancing behind me I felt my blood run cold at how close the beast had got to me. With my eyes on the creature I felt my foot connect with a rock or twig and the ground rushed up to meet me. Dead leaves from fall's past littered the ground softening the blow of the fall, turning I realised in horror that the creature hovered over me, pushing myself back through the rustling leaves. The beast reared onto its back legs causing me to still, pressing myself as flat against the ground as I could as its claws slashed the air above me.
The creature seemed to realise it wasn't quite close enough as it took a small step forward rearing again. Slamming my eyes shut against the blow I could feel coming I waited for the pain. A masculine yell sounded to my left followed by metal slicing the air. I felt the magic that identified the creature shift away from me, taking my chances I peaked my eyes open. A man stood between myself and the creature slashing at the creature in a threatening manor forcing it backwards. Gasping I pushed myself up onto my elbows, watching as my saviour thrust his sword towards the creature's eyes. The beast hisses in warning and likely fear. I could only watch as the man thrust his sword to the creature's hide, the sword broke off not leaving so much as a scratch upon the beast's body.
The man turned quickly, dropping his sword yelling at me as he raced towards me. "Run! Run!" turning I managed to push myself somewhat up before I felt a warm hand wrap around my right arm and help push me forward. Crouching in my run the man beside me causing me to become very aware of the loose binds resting against my chest. Racing through the forest the creature on our heels, the man released my arm allowing me to cast a quick glance behind us. The creature still bounded after us however we'd managed to place a little space between us and it.
Entering a small clearing a fallen tree blocking the path ahead, we quickly approached the fallen wood risking another glance back I watched the creature enter the clearing hissing furiously. Snapping my head back around we ascended the fallen tree the man's arm connected with my back forcing me downwards. Falling to the ground behind the tree I felt the creature fly through the gap in the trees overhead.
Panting for breath I looked up over the fallen tree catching a flicker of the retreating creature. As I fought to grab my breath back I could only wonder why it had given up its chase. "It's gone." I breathe out in relief. Glancing back down at the man beside me pushing myself forward so my shirt tumbled forward hiding my womanly features as best I could. "You saved my life." I stated, the man looked at me, I realised he was panting harder than I was and clutching his side tightly. Pain flashed in the man's eyes as I noticed his eyes running over me, eager to pull his attention away from my form I pulled my right hand from behind me. "I'm Merlin." I introduced.
The man pulled his right hand around his form. "Lancelot." He introduced returning the gesture as his hand clasped mine in a week shake. I nodded making a mental note of the name, Lancelot grunted in pain his hand falling from mine as his head slid to the tree behind us, his eyes closed as another grunt of pain escaped him. Glancing at the man before me I realised quickly he needed help as his left hand fell away revealing blood soaked through his shirt.
Pushing myself upward I mentally nodded as I tightened my bindings, knowing I could not return to Camelot in my current state. Rushing I pulled the binding slightly too quickly, my skin caught causing me to wince lightly. Bindings tightened, shirt flattened I gazed at the laboured breathing of Lancelot, pulling his arm I lifted him to his feet. Swinging Lancelot's left arm across my shoulders holding the appendage with my left hand, as my right arm wrapped around his waist. Leaning to my left I shuffled from the forest, the journey was slow and sweat began to drip down my brow at the effort of carrying the limp man.
The gate to the outer courtyard loomed overhead, taking a deep breath I forced my tired muscles onwards towards gateway. The guards at the gateway seemed to recognise me, one of them coming forward and offered me assistance which I gratefully accepted. The guard swung Lancelot's other arm over his shoulder and helped me through the busy streets, the citizens flashed us concerned looks at the sight of the unconscious man in our grasp.
The guard helped me half drag, half carry Lancelot up the steps leading to Gaius' chambers. The guard kicked the door open once we arrived at it, Gaius who had been studying his books looked up in slight fright. Concern soon replaced the fright at the sight of the patent, we laid Lancelot upon the bed as Gaius stuffed two big pillows under his head to ensure its elevation. With a sincere thanks I excused the guard, knowing he needed to return to duty.
Gaius ordered me to remove Lancelot's shoes, as I did so Gaius shot me a calculating look before beginning his examination. Placing Lancelot's shoes safety aware somewhere no one would fall over them; the broom cupboard, I walked behind Gaius to sit on the bench beside him. Leaning forward slightly I watched as Gaius dabbed a cloth over the wound in Lancelot's side. Flashing me a brief glance Gaius revealed. "The wound itself is superficial. The fever will pass. He should be fine in the morning." Gaius' tone switched to one of concern as he deliberately caught my eye. "Now, are you going to tell me what happened?" He questioned.
Sighing internally I nodded, I began my recount of the story not leaving out a single detail. "I'm worried Gaius, he must have noticed. When he wakes up he'll know some of what I'm hiding."
Gaius sighed shaking his head slightly at my foolishness. "He may not entirely remember the details, but I think it best you have a discussion with him in private when he does awaken." He stated, his tone suggesting that the matter was not up for debate. Sighing heavily I agreed with Gaius' terms.
With a lot of shuffling and muttered curses we shuffled Lancelot into my room, to provide him more privacy to rest. Tucking the covers into place I nodded slightly, moving and opening my window slightly to allow fresh air to enter my slightly stuffy room. Ensuring a fresh glass of water was placed upon the side, I advanced back into the main room knowing I could no longer put off my duties to the Prince. Sighing slightly I informed Gaius of where I would likely be should he require me for anything, he merely nodded allowing me to exit the room.
Walking through the castle grounds a knight informed me that Arthur, Uther and a group of knight had ridden out for an urgent matter and had not given a return time. The guard informed me Arthur had left a list of jobs for me within his chambers, sighing I thanked the guard and continued on my journey.
The day passed quickly with little time to linger on the fear of the conversation I needed to have with Lancelot when he awakes. The list of jobs that Arthur had left me to complete wasn't all that long as I assumed he hadn't really had any way to gage how long he and his father would be gone.
The warm day swiftly cooled as the sun descended darkening the sky as torches and fires lit within homes. As I'd finished all my jobs I walked slowly back to Gaius' chambers, all the thoughts I had managed to suppress during my tasks swarmed within my head. All of my thoughts buzzed noisily in my mind, all of them indistinguishable from the rest. Sighing heavily I entered the physician's quarters, glancing around I noticed Gaius cooking our evening meal. Confusion swirling within my mind I sat heavily at the table, at the noise Gaius glanced towards flashing me a confused glance. Crossing my arms on the table in front of me I buried my head in their folds, the voices of possible problems screaming as time dragged on.
The scrape of wood forced me to jump slowly picking my head up from my arms as Gaius sat down at the other side of the bench. Noticing my look of inquiry he pushed a bowl of broth and a plate of bread towards me. Pushing myself to a normal seated position I placed my spoon within the broth in front of me, staring into the liquid food I felt all my thoughts fighting for dominance one more.
"There is no point worrying about it prematurely." Gaius stated breaking the heavy silence that hovered around me. Jumping slightly at the sudden noise I tore my gaze away from the meal I had no appetite for replacing it with the understanding gaze of my guardian.
Sighing heavily I allowed my shoulders and head to slump forward. "How can I not?" I questioned staring at the wooden table between us, my mind tracing the visible grain patterns. "I was stupid, I made a careless error." I muttered more to myself than to Gaius unable to halt the flow of my thoughts now that they had begun to unravel, locking eyes with Gaius once more I asked the one question that was plaguing me more than any other. "What if he did see and we cannot prevent him from telling someone?"
Gaius sighed heavily, he looked away. Hands folded upon the table in front of him he thought for a time, clearly thinking the question through carefully. "Then we will deal with that when the time arises." He revealed as his eyes shifted to mine.
I felt the desperation ooze onto my face as I considered the options that now faced me. "I'll be banished from Camelot for my lie won't I? Or worse killed?" I stated more than asked, the possible end results were obvious to me.
Guilt swarmed onto Gaius face. "I'm not sure Merlin, I wish I had an answer that would put your mind at ease." He replied shifting in discomfort at his words. "Sadly I do not have the answer you seek." He concluded with a gentle sigh, sadness pooling into his eyes as he gazed at his interlinked fingers.
Wanting to put Gaius at ease any way I could I pulled a smile onto my face and with a slight sigh stated. "Thanks anyway."
"Try not to dwell upon it." Gaius advised a slight smile gracing his features at the sight of mine.
"I'll try. But how do you put something like this from your mind?" I quizzed hoping that Gaius would know of a way I could distract myself.
"Occupy your mind with other matters." Gaius in-putted, his brows furrowing as he thought for a moment. "Read a book or something." He suggested.
Thinking back to how I'd managed to occupy my thoughts earlier with my chores, a book seemed like a nicer option than looking for more work to do. "I might as well give it a try." I stated, pushing myself up from my seat. Determination swirling around me as I prepared myself to find something worthy of reading. Grinning slightly I realised the task of finding a book would likely prove as much of a distraction as the book itself.
Darkness crept towards me quickly, the night was setting in fast. My little flickering candle burning as brightly as it dared against the coming blackness. The world around me swam, floating and shifting as my mind fixed itself into the wonderful fantasy world that had been hidden within this tome. A noble prince had invaded a hostile kingdom in disguise as a peasant, becoming familiar with life there. Hoping to learn the best way to over throw this potential threat, however the more time the prince remained in this kingdom the more he began to enjoy his life there. He made friends; of which previously he had few, that cared little for such things like titles are more for loyalty and caring. The prince preferred his life in this so called 'hostile kingdom' even if his life was one lie after another.
The lies of his past began to catch up to him, his friends became suspicious and wondered of the life he would not reveal. Wanting to remain with these people the prince told his friends half-truths that would sate their curiosity, but the half-lies made the prince anxious, he wondered when they would finally catch up to him and the web that he weaved himself would be too sticky to leave.
The world outside of the pages that sped through my mind seemed to stop existing, I felt myself pulled into the story that weaved itself around me. I could easily place myself into the prince's position, I was unsure if I could do so because of the lies that I weaved or because of the secret I could not reveal. Shrugging the thought away I continued to read slouching over the table in Gaius' chambers, blinking away the heaviness of my eyes I watched as the words began to swim around the page. Taking a deep breath I felt the book slip from my tired fingers as darkness overcame me.
"Merlin?" A voice called faintly, a small shake causing my awareness to awaken. Blinking tiredly I glanced around, pushing myself from the table I felt my arms and back groan in discomfort, a small popping noise issued from my back as I stretched my arms above my head. Lips smacking together I finally located Gaius, he held a look of slight concern. Tilting my head slightly I scratched the back of my head. "It's time." Gaius stated. Freezing mid yawn, I caught his eyes as the flickered from my room to me and back. Sighing I nodded tiredly as I forced my aching limbs into motion.
My neckerchief lay on the table, where I'd placed it at some point during the night. My binding remained on but had shifted a little loose through the night. Glancing at Gaius and noticing him collecting his items for his morning deliveries I decided to quickly re-tighten them before facing Lancelot, on the slim chance he hadn't noticed yesterday I didn't want to give him a chance to notice now.
With my bindings now tightened I began the journey to my door, the small journey towards my room had never filled me with such uncertainty before. Pausing before the door I forced myself to take a deep breath. Raising my hand, heart pounding loudly in my chest, timidly I knocked against the wood. "Come in." A voice called from behind the door.
Forcing another breath into my lungs I forced myself forward swinging the door open as I did so. Pausing in the door way I looked into my room, confusion swirled around me as I could not see the current occupant. "Lancelot?" I asked the room.
A small chuckle issued from my left hand side, turning my head I found Lancelot standing upon the chair looking out over Camelot as I had done when I first arrived here. His arms were crossed over his chest "Merlin, good morning." He welcomed still chuckling slightly. "I understand I have you to thank for my arrival here." He concluded motioning for me to enter the room with a flick of his head.
Stepping into my room, I placed myself opposite him on the other side of my bed, a chair loomed behind me but I dared not take it yet. "Lancelot…?" I stated my voice wavering slightly making his name sound like a question. Shaking myself internally I forced another big breath into my lungs, with slight determination I locked my eyes with his. "I wonder if you could answer some questions about yesterday for me?" I enquired.
A serious expression flashed across Lancelot's face as he registered my question, he straightened up hands falling to his sides. "Of course." He replied his eyebrows raised in what seemed like concern.
No longer able to meet his eyes I looked down and with a self-motivating sigh forced the question from my mouth. "What did you see?"
"A creature unlike any I have ever witnessed before." Lancelot replied in a slightly cold voice.
Frowning slightly I lifted my head to gaze at him once more. "Anything else?" I asked.
Lancelot looked me over, his expression softening as he nodded slightly. "A lady in need of assistance that I gladly offered." He explained. My heart skipped a beat, he knew. He'd confirmed that he knew one of my secrets, my mind screamed in realisation. Falling backwards I slumped into the chair beside my bed, eyes fixed upon the covers as my mind spiralled. "Did I miss something?" Lancelot questioned in a soft voice.
"No…" I replied with a slight scoff. "No, you didn't." I continued, my mind thinking that he had obviously seen too well given his condition yesterday. My mind rambled and I heard myself say with a sigh. "I guess it was too much to assume you'd not seen everything."
"Merlin?" Lancelot called in a soothing tone, looking at him I noticed curiosity and sympathy etched upon his face. "Why do you hide what you are?" He asked.
Sighing in defeat I pushed myself into a more comfortable position, locking eyes with Lancelot once more I began my tale. "From as long ago as I remember my mother has warned me of the dangers and hardships women and girls face. So to give me the best possible chance she could she disguised me as a male." I skipped over a lot of the detail as he simply wanted an explanation and I was not prepared for him to know everything about my past. I was very careful to not plant any hints that I was hiding anything more than my gender.
Curiosity still burned in Lancelot's eyes. "Does it not bother you?" He quizzed.
"Sometimes the lies bother me, but I know why I tell them." I revealed with a sigh. "I just hope that one day I'll be able to reveal the truth, but who knows what will happen then." I added, eyes widening at what I'd just stated as I had allowed the thought to slip without any conscious editing.
"You're afraid?" Lancelot concluded.
Chuckling slightly. "Terrified." I revealed for the first time, I've always known how scared I am of people finding out my secrets. I was scared they would treat me differently from before, my only experience being with Will and it had taken him a while to adjust to the information. "I fear what will become of me should they know the truth." I stated as moisture gathered in my eyes.
"I see." Lancelot replied. I watched as his eyes swept me once before locking with mine again, a smile broke onto his face. "Well, you're secret is safe with me Merlin." He stated, my heart raced at his thoughtfulness. "However, know this your friends will accept you when you reveal yourself. If they do not, then they were not really your friends to begin with." He added pausing briefly as he clearly considered his net words. "Yes it may take them some time to adjust, but real friends will accept you." He concluded.
"Thank you." I breathed, a tear falling from my left eye as a smile spread across my lips. "You have no idea how much those words mean to me." I added as I knew he would have no idea how much it meant to me for him to accept me.
Lancelot issued a small smile my way before turning to look out over the citadel once more. "Camelot." He sighed happily, I tilted my head slightly in confusion. "It is a lot different than I imagined." He continued.
"You've thought of it before?" I asked genuinely curious as I pulled a cover over my legs and up to my chest folding my arms over the cover to keep it in place.
Lancelot folded his arms back across his chest as he leaned against the wall next to the window. "Ever since I was a child I've dreamed of coming here." He sighed slightly looking back towards me, a smile stretching across his face as a small breeze ruffled his hair. "It's my life's ambition to join the knights of Camelot."
Lancelot's gaze flickered from me to the citadel his arms loosening themselves, his left returning to his side as his right touched the window pane. Unable to keep the smile off my face I raised my arm and allowed it to fall, in a gesture I hoped put across that I wondered what he was waiting for. I quickly tucked my arm back into my arm fold. Lancelot flashed a look at me as his shoulders fell slightly as he sighed once more.
"I know what you're thinking, I...I expect too much." He shrugged as his eyebrows raised in a defeated manor as he stepped down from the stand. I felt my eyebrows furrow in confusion at his utter defeat in this matter. "After all, who am I?" Lancelot asked with a heavy sigh, his head turning to the still open window where the life of the citadel lay beyond. "They have their pick of the best and bravest in the land." He continued gesturing towards the window.
Holding back a slight laugh I interrupted him before he could put himself down any more that he had already. "Lancelot." I called causing him to turn his head to face me once more.
"Yes?" He stated indicating that he had heard my call.
Pushing myself forward I locked my eyes with his, so that he could see I was not lying when I revealed. "They are going to love you."
Confusion and slight pride flashed across Lancelot's face. "They are?" He asked as he stepped towards me.
I allowed a little laugh to escape from my lips as I attempted to reassure him further. "I've seen you in action." I reminded him, pointing slightly towards him briefly. "You could shame the great Arthur himself." I concluded looking briefly towards my door before locking eyes with the slowly advancing Lancelot.
He scoffed, obviously not believing the words I knew to be true. He stopped advancing swaying slightly on his foot as a grin flashed across his face. "I hardly think so." He stated.
Chuckling slightly to myself I forced a serious expression upon my face, glaring at a part of the wall near Lancelot but deliberately not looking at him. "In fact, you know what I'm going to do?" I asked looking back at the man who had saved me. "I'm going to talk to him right now." I stated as I quickly pulled the cover from my form and stood up in one swift movement, quickly advancing to the door before Lancelot could stop me.
"You know Arthur?" Lancelot questioned, disbelief lacing his every word.
I'd reached my door at this point so I briefly paused to flash a grin at Lancelot and state with a smirk. "Oh yes." Ducking out of my door I quickly advanced through Gaius' chamber grabbing my coat from near the door and throwing it on.
"Wait." Lancelot called just as I reached the main door.
"What is it?" I enquired wondering why he'd stopped me.
Lancelot smiled at me. "I'm coming with you." He announced before hurrying to my side before following me to where I knew Arthur should be around this time.
We arrived at the training grounds where I had guessed correctly that Arthur would be. Knights, servants, guards and a few citizens were still taking their positions upon the grounds as Arthur picked up his gloves and prepared himself to test the noble in front of him. I motioned for Lancelot to follow me as I moved behind a weapon stand near a medical tent. Leaning against the wood of the stand I watched as Arthur began to place his gloves on, a part of me registering Lancelot standing with his arms folded on my right hand side.
Smiling slightly to myself my attention was drawn back to Arthur as he stepped forwards pushing the spaces between his gloves to ensure they would not hinder him. Glancing around slightly Arthur coughed lightly breaking the once growing silence. "Right, you jumped up dung beetle, this is it." He stated in a loud voice that held an edge of seriousness to it. Arthur began to walk forward, his presence in these situations always seemed a little intimidating. "The final test." Arthur announced as he began to walk past the noble to take his place upon the ground. "Pass this and you're a knight of Camelot." He revealed, I felt Lancelot place a foot upon the stand I was leaned against noticing out of the corner of my eye that he placed his arms flickered towards his hips. "Fail, and you're no one." Arthur continued his voice taking on a slightly sad tone.
Glancing to Lancelot I noticed him tucking his arms behind his back as he shifted slightly in obvious nervousness. A smiled pulled at my lips as I turned my gaze back to Arthur "You face the most feared of all foes, the ultimate killing machine." Arthur taunted still fixing his gloves. He glanced up a serious expression fixed upon his face as he turned slowly to face the noble who now stood where Arthur had once stood. "You face me." Arthur revealed, causing me to chuckle slightly under my breath. The noble seemed to be unfazed by Arthur's reveal as he swung two blades in front of him; one in each hand, in a wild manoeuvre, most likely to loosen his wrists as Arthur did before battles. "You're challenge to last one minute free combat." The noble continued to swing as Arthur reached the end of his introduction to the battle. "Grummond, Second son of Wessex." Arthur stated as he extracted his blade from its hilt. Arthur glanced behind him and with a slight nod turned back to his opponent as a servant turned an hourglass. "Your time starts now." Arthur announced.
Grummond swung the blade in his right hand in a circle ahead of him as he advanced towards Arthur, my magic tingled slightly at the sight of a threat nearing the prince. As Grummond advanced his left blade began to swing in the wild manoeuvre he had displayed earlier, flashing a concerned look at Arthur I noticed the determination and confidence upon his face and felt myself relax slightly. The space between the two men narrowed forcing Grummond to stop his wild swings, pausing for a moment he drew his right-hand blade up to shoulder height and with a yell swung at Arthur. Arthur ducked under the wild swing, the attack continued slicing through the thin air where the prince had stood a mere instant ago, the blade in Grummond's left hand swung slightly from the momentum.
Arthur now stood behind the noble allowing him to turn slightly, a small grin flickered across Arthur's face as his left elbow collided with Grummond's stomach causing the noble to bow forward in pain. Before the noble could regain himself Arthur grabbed his head slightly with his right hand before his right knee connected with Grummond's nose. Grummond fell groaning in pain, his blades falling from his grasp as he connected with the ground. Arthur looked annoyed as the small crowd applauded their prince at the easy defeat of the noble. Glancing at Lancelot I noticed a concerned look upon his face but that would not peal the smile from my face. Looking back at Arthur I watched as he learned forward and removed the coloured cloth from the noble's belt. Arthur looked behind him once more to some servants beside the tent. "Take him away." He ordered before walking towards the edge of the grounds.
Flashing a grin at Lancelot I hurried after Arthur knowing I would have to start my duties soon anyway, at my approach Arthur glanced my way briefly before ordering me to collect his items of armour before following him. I arranged all the pieces onto Arthur's shield to make carrying the items easier.
Walking behind the prince we passed through the busy marketplace as he wrapped his sword belt around his sheathed blade. Arthur flashed a glance towards me before continuing through the busy street, people making room for their prince did not offer me the same courtesy as I struggled to keep behind him. "Grummond's the third to fail this month." Arthur started causing me to hurry forward slightly to be able to hear him more clearly. "How am I meant to defend Camelot with rubbish like that?" He questioned flashing me a look of confusion.
"Well, I think I might be able to help." I offered in a slightly raised voice to ensure the prince would hear me over the noise of the marketplace.
"You, Merlin?" Arthur asked turning to look at me in disbelief before returning his gaze to the path in front of him. "You haven't the faintest idea what it takes to become a knight. Courage, fortitude, discipline." He stated flashing me another look of disbelief as he placed his sword wrapped up in its belt noisily on top of his armour.
Pausing briefly as I restrained from laughing at his misunderstanding. "No, no, no, of course I don't, but I do know someone who does." I informed after rushing to catch up to the prince, I had allowed a small laugh to slip through my words after I admitted I obviously didn't know what it took to become a knight.
"Yeah?" Arthur asked with a note of curiosity as he turned his face to look at me.
Nodding slightly to reassure Arthur I answered in a serious tone. "He saved my life."
Arthur turned away from me one more with a slight chuckle. "That's blowing it for starters." He replied.
Despite Arthur not looking at me I shook my head as I denied the doubt Arthur held. "No, no, no. He's really good. Honestly." I revealed decreasing the space between us once more.
"That's great, Merlin." Arthur stated slightly coldly. "I'm sure he's terrific, but you forget the First Code of Camelot." Arthur continued now facing me with a slightly amused look upon his face having stopped after stating that he was sure Lancelot was terrific.
"The what?" I questioned glaring slightly as the sun now shone directly upon my left eye.
"The First Code." Arthur replied nodding slightly as he removed his gloves from his hands. "Only those of noble blood can serve as knights." He revealed, I turned slightly my eyes scanning the busy streets ahead as my mind wondered how I would get around this code. "So, unless your friend is a nobleman..." Arthur continued as he placed the gloves on top of my mounting pile of things.
"Oh, er, he, he is a nobleman." I interrupted my gaze flashing back to the prince. I hoped beyond hope that my stuttering didn't betray me Arthur meeting my gaze shortly after my stutter.
"Is he?" The prince questioned in disbelief, his eyes showed no sign of doubting me. His words seemed to only doubt that I had stumbled upon a nobleman, and that said nobleman had saved me.
My head nodding despite my lie, I hurried to reply hoping that Arthur would not see the lie on my face. "Absolutely."
A flashed a nervous glance down the road again as a small smile graced Arthur's face. "Very well." He stated, I nodded slightly thinking to myself that Arthur should smile more. The prince seemed more at ease and more like a person than a noble figure when he smiled, also the world seemed a little brighter when he did smile. "Bring him to the training ground tomorrow." Arthur continued jarring me out of my thoughts, his smile had faded as his voice had taken a serious tone of authority. "And make sure he brings his seal of nobility." He added, his eyebrows raising slightly as he turned and continued down the path we had been travelling.
"Thanks Arthur. You won't regret it." I shouted a smile stretching across my face I nearly dropped the items in my arms over my excitement but I clung to them not wanting to be scolded by anyone.
Smirking slightly to myself I practically run through the halls of the castle determined to return to Lancelot quickly, Arthur's armour laid within the armoury all cleaned and shining once more. The door to Gaius' chambers in sight I smiled slightly to myself pausing to collect myself. An idea flashed in my mind and with a slight smirk I caught my breath before slowly stepping through the door.
I noticed as I stepped through the door was that Gaius had returned and was currently working upon something. Lancelot stood at the far end of the room gazing out of a window, I briefly wondered if it would become a habit of his as I fully entered the room. Lancelot turned as he heard the door squeak, he flashed a small smile at me before slow running a short distance.
"Well?" Lancelot asked a shine of excitement twinkling within his eyes. I glanced down at the floor briefly composing myself. "Did you speak to him?" Lancelot questioned as he advanced a little closer.
Sighing slightly I replied. "Yeah, I spoke to him."
"And?" Lancelot enquired as his eagerness seemed to hum from his very being.
Breaking eye contact with Lancelot I walked forward to close the distance between us, I tried to keep a solemn look upon my face. As I neared Lancelot my lips twitched begging to break into a smile, I pouted my lips as I sucked in a breath to prevent the smile breaking free. I briefly hopped that Lancelot wouldn't consider me strange. "And..." I trailed off as I stood directly in front of Lancelot, not meeting his eyes.
Flashing Lancelot a brief glance I sighed heavily as I shook my head, a giggle threatened to escape my lips as I gazed at the floor.
"No." Lancelot whispered in disappointment.
Looking up I was met with the side of Lancelot's face, the disappointment clearly etched upon his features. Not wanting to allow him to suffer from my deceit any longer than necessary I laughed slightly before stating. "He said he would like to meet you." Allowing another laugh to pass my lips at Lancelot's look of shock and amazement.
"Yes!" Lancelot exclaimed his knees folding slightly before he span around in a happy circle causing me to laugh again. Lancelot turned to face me once more, still crouching slightly. "Thank you." He stated as he grasped my arms with both hands, his hands shaking slightly he broke contact with my arms just to grasp them further up bringing himself closer to me. "Thank you!" He thanked again his voice breaking with emotion.
Brushing Lancelot's hands from my arms I gazed at the floor as I fought the heat beginning to pool in my checks at the thanks. "Hey, really, it was no problem, really. It's nothing." I muttered in a very embarrassed tone as I pushed myself away from Lancelot. Glancing to the side I coughed slightly to cover my embarrassment, looking back to my friend I questioned in a half serious half joking tone. "You're not a nobleman, by any chance, are you?"
Lancelot leaned towards me slightly with an amused grin. "A nobleman?" He questioned as he straightened, I nodded slightly to ensure he knew that I needed to know the answer to that question. Scoffing slightly he answered. "No." Lancelot laughed slightly. I felt my grin fall from my face as I positioned myself to face him. "Good lord, no." He laughed as I felt nervousness trickle through my system. "Why do you ask? Lancelot enquired.
Shuffling my hands slightly I gazed at my feet slightly preparing myself for what I had to say. Taking a step forward I stated in an annoyed tone. "It's just that there's this..."
The First Code of Camelot states that only those of noble blood can serve as a knight." Gaius interrupted, I felt my eyes roll slightly at the tone of absoluteness that issued form Gaius' words. Gaius entered my peripheral vision on my right hand side as he continued, his tone unchanging despite the hurt that radiated from Lancelot's being. "Uther created the knights to protect this kingdom from those who wished to destroy it. He knew he would have to trust each of his knights with his life." I flashed an irritated look at Gaius, noticing him looking back to Lancelot as our eyes met briefly. "So he chose them from the families that had sworn allegiance to him." Gaius continued.
"The nobility." I stated coldly.
Lancelot looked down, his form crumbling in defeat at the words Gaius was saying. "And thus the First Code of Camelot was born, and ever since that day, only the sons of noble families have served as knights." Gaius concluded looking down upon the distort figure of Lancelot who now seated himself upon the bench.
"But that is not fair." I complained turning slightly to face Gaius with an annoyed glare, as I turned I noticed a pained look flashed across Lancelot's face.
Gaius turned slightly to face me. "Fair or unfair, that's the way it is." He stated in a definitive tone his gaze continuously switching from me and Lancelot before coming to a rest on the defeated looking man. "I'm sorry, Lancelot." Gaius stated, a whisper of a scoff issued from Lancelot before Gaius added "Truly, I am."
Lancelot flinched slightly at the note in Gaius' tone before allowing his gaze to fall upon me once more. I felt eyes upon me, turning to look I faced Gaius and the warning of a glare he issued before breaking eye contact and walking away to continue with whatever he'd previously been occupying himself with.
Looking back at Lancelot I could only watch as he sighed in defeat, lowering his head he placed his hands behind his head with his elbows rested upon his legs. Pity coursed through me at seeing my saviour show such defeat over a mere fact of birth. I defied mine every time I bound my chest and held back my magic as much as I could without allowing harm to come upon the people I cared for. Sighing slightly I decided upon a plan of action but first I needed to comfort the very sorrowful man in front of me, I could not bear the look of pain within my friend's eyes.
Stepping forward I lowered myself to Lancelot's height. Placing my arm onto his back I rubbed what I hoped were soothing circles upon it. "Come on." I encouraged as I gripped Lancelot's right-hand sleeve and pulling him slightly I rose to my feet. Shifting his hands from his head Lancelot glanced at me, I noticed slight moisture gathering in his eyes. Pulling upon Lancelot's sleeve again I nodded slightly at his confused look. Gripping his sleeve more securely I pulled once more, this time Lancelot seemed to follow my lead ad rose to his feet. Though he was standing his entire frame radiated sadness and disappointment, issuing a small smile I released Lancelot's sleeve and motioned for him to follow me.
Walking forward I removed my coat hanging it upon the storage cupboard door, moving back into the room I grabbed a small candle from the table. Flashing a small glance behind me to ensure Lancelot was following me, we ascended the small set of stairs and entered my room. The day had taken a dark turn, causing my room to radiate darkness. Walking forward I brought the small candle to light the thick candle that hung on a piece of wood, suspended by a chain, within my room. As I lit the candle I noticed that I would soon need to replace it, a creak issued behind me. Glancing around I noticed Lancelot standing quite a distance form me, he fiddled with the bands upon his arms the sorrow radiating from him still. Looking back at the candles so that I could light the thicker one successfully I decided to ask the question I'd been wondering since Lancelot had told me of his dream. "Why do you want to be a knight so much?"
"When I was a boy, my village was attacked by raiders from the northern plains." Lancelot revealed pausing every now and then as though considering his words. The candle successfully lit I turned to face Lancelot, I walked to my bed content to sit and carefully listen to Lancelot's story. Lancelot also moved but made no move to sit as he rested himself against the wall, positioning himself to face me.
"They were slaughtered where they stood, my father, my mother." He continued, emotion leaking into his voice as the memories likely played through his mind. I carefully placed the small candle upon the small table next to my bed top allow for more light to radiate around the room. "Everyone." A small shudder moved through Lancelot's body as I seated myself upon the edge of my bed, folding my arms so that I could rest them against my legs and lean forward slightly.
"I alone escaped." The words seemed to echo around my room, moisture gathering in Lancelot's eyes as he shook his head slightly, pushing himself from the wall before continuing,. "I vowed that day that never again would I be helpless in the face of tyranny." He revealed standing at the end of my bed. "I made sword craft my life." I felt myself nodding slightly at the words that Lancelot spoke. "Every waking hour since that day, I devoted to the art of combat, and when I was ready, I set forth for Camelot." Lancelot looked down, defeat radiating from his frame once more. "And now, it seems, my journey ends." Lancelot moved forward inching closer to me with every step. "Everything I fought for, wasted." He concluded seating himself a small distance from me upon the edge of the bed.
My heart throbbed in sympathy for Lancelot's trails, the hurt look upon his face had at some point that I could not pinpoint morphed into a look of utter loss "I give you my word, whatever it takes, I will make this right." I stated confidently, Lancelot met my gaze briefly as I turned my head to gaze at my wall considering my options. One thing I knew for certain, I was running out of time.
Nodding slightly to myself I pushed myself from my bed as an idea lodged itself within my mind. There was no time to think of another plan I'd have to play through this plan as it unfolded. I wondered briefly if this was a good idea but I could think of no other to replace it. Smiling slightly at Lancelot I exited my room, Gaius shooting me a concerned look as I passed through the chambers quickly grabbing and donning my coat as I rushed to escape the chambers without a lecture from Gaius, one I knew I'd have to endure sooner or later. As I reached for my neckerchief I wrapped it around a roll of parchment that I would need to complete my task, issuing a small smile to Gaius I exited the chambers, tucking the parchment into my coat and donning my neckerchief I set off towards my destination.
Sooner than I realised I'd arrived at the location my plan would have to commence. I entered the library and was a little distressed when I noticed that Geoffrey of Monmouth was still at his desk. Nodding slightly as I forced my nerves down I began to browse the shelves looking for the book of noble family seals. As I was the only one within this area other than Geoffrey I could feel his eyes watching my every move.
Holding the edge of the bookcases I leaned forward to read a thick book, the title on the side was faded causing me o tilt my head to the side in an attempt to read it clearer. A few of the letters became clearer and I was almost certain that this was the book that I needed. Letting go of the edge I reached forward and pulled the book from the shelf. Catching the heavy tome with hy other hand. A shuffle issued from Geoffrey's position, turning my head I met his curious gaze. Fear rippled through me at how carefully I was being observed, I briefly wondered if I would be able to complete what I needed to do. "Homework." I stated hoping that would quell a little of the man's curiosity, enough so that he would stop observing me so intently. I noticed Geoffrey rolled his eyes slightly before turning back and heaving the heavy tome from the shelf, my arms locked as he sudden weight assaulted them, my magic swirled through my arms allowing me to carry the book easier.
Walking I paused in front of Geoffrey, noticing via my peripheral vision that he had returned to the work he was doing. I paused briefly opening the book and allowing the pages to land where they may, a smile tugged at my lips as I observed the information on the page. This book was the one I was looking for a slight note of fear ran through me at the thought of what I now must do. I closed the book quickly, dust flying into my face in a thick cloud. I felt Geoffrey glare at me as a sneeze ripped through me, mentally shaking myself I turned the book to its cover, turning I walked between some book shelves putting as much distance between myself and Geoffrey that the library would allow.
Stationed between two bookshelves was a table, I placed the book upon it, careful to position my back to the only other being in the room. He shouldn't be able to see what I was doing from here, my back and the bookshelf should block his view, however I feared this would only make him more curious. Carefully turning the cover of the tome, I observed the beautiful detail of the seal of nobility in exquisite detail.
Running my hand along the unseen pages I pried the book open about half way, flipping the pages to see the seal upon the page I had selected. The name and seal was impressive but for some reason it did not appeal to me for Lancelot. Flipping through a few pages I internally winced at the loudness of which they tuned, the thickness of them not allowing them to be quiet, a mental image of a hourglass quickly running out of sand appeared in my mind. Finally I stopped at a seal that caught my attention, a border of light red broken with dark red triangles lined a few inches in from all the edges. A fancy helmet flowing from which seemed to be varying sizes of leaves coloured in blue and gold sat upon a shield.
The shield's imagery was broken into two sections the bottom of which seemed to be a blue castle wall with red swords crossed upon it, a red background separated the small distance between the lower and upper parts of the design. The upper part was a banner of blue with what looked to be five red 'V's breaking the bottom line of the banner in equal spacing, Underneath the shield in a ribbon scroll were the words 'VITRUS VENERATI PEDELITAS'.
There was also words upon the page, the words above the seal reading 'The Noble Seal Of'. Followed by the words below the seal 'Richard' 'fourth son of' 'Lord Eldred of Northumbria'. A smile tugged at my lips as I nodded slightly, pulling myself back to what I was about to do I risked a glance over my shoulder tilting my body so that I could see Geoffrey, I felt a relieved sigh pass through me as I noticed he'd yet to leave his desk and seemed content upon his work. Smiling slightly to myself again I returned to the task at hand, very much aware that time was not on my side and I was taking a very big risk with what I was about to do. Reaching into my coat I removed the parchment I'd tucked into the top of my trousers, the paper was noisy to handle and I quickly unrolled it. Relief swam through me upon realising the piece I'd picked up in my rush was the right size for what I needed, smoothing the paper onto the blank back if the previous page to the seal I'd chosen. A knock echoed through the library and I realised Geoffrey might be on the move, there was no time to back out, no time for this to go wrong, no time for anything other than to proceed and hope that I had enough time.
My left hand held the bottom of the blank parchment as my right hovered above the page with the seal. "Ic us bisen hræd tán hwanon." I chanted in a whispered tone, mentally picturing what I wished for the blank paper to say. The seal within the book glowed slightly as my vision swam with gold, magic raced forward I felt it swim through the page with the seal then leak into the blank parchment transferring the imagery and wording across as it did so except 'Richard' had been replaced with Lancelot and 'fourth son' had been changed to 'fifth son' for some reason the ink of the writing had been changed from black to red.
I had no time to worry over it, my gaze flashed from one seal to the other, it looked perfect. I let out a shuddering breath as I felt Geoffrey edging closer the flush of my magic mixed with the air alerting me to his slow advance, he was close, scarily close. Without further ado I rolled Lancelot's 'seal' back up placing it hurriedly back into the top of my trousers. No sooner was the parchment safely stored than a throat clearing issued to my right-hand side. Jumping a little at the sudden noise in the otherwise silent room I quickly closed the book, fearful that he would take note of the page I was upon if I was not fast about covering for myself.
Issuing a small sign of relief I pushed myself from the bench picking the tome up as I did, careful to ensure my coat remained covering the parchment stuffed just inside my trousers I walked towards Geoffrey handing him back the book I'd taken from the shelves, in a move I hoped removed some suspicion from his mind. "It's a..." I trailed off patting the upward facing cover twice "real page turner." I stated, confusion flooded Geoffrey's face and I mentally scolded myself for the remark as I quickly turned and walked from the library.
Travelling as fast as I could without actually running through the castle I made my way back to Lancelot, the smile stretched across my lips could not be restrained. Every step forced me to restrain myself from breaking into a run, there were far too many people around to be running through the hallways.
The door finally in sight I reached behind my coat and grasped the paper from my trousers, my smile stretching further at the feel of the paper. The door was open slightly, likely someone had exited or entered recently and not checked that the door closed behind them. I briefly wondered if I'd closed the door in my rush to the library, shaking my head to rid myself of such distracting thoughts I entered Gaius' chambers without touching the door.
Lancelot stood pealing an apple with a small knife over one of the tables, his right foot propped upon the bench behind the table. He glanced up briefly, his eyes locking with mine before returning to his work. My slightly fading smile flashed back to its full brightness at the sight of him there, all but skipping I walked closer to him holding the seal in my right hand I raised it to shoulder height. The motion caught Lancelot's attention, he stared at the paper for a brief moment of silence, a piece of cut apple falling to the floor un-noticed.
"What's that?" Lancelot questioned with a slight shrug, his gaze flickering to me before returning to his apple.
"This is your seal of nobility." I revealed in a slightly excited tone as I pointed the paper in my hand at him.
Lancelot shakes his head slightly confusion flashing across his face. "I don't understand." He stated in a tone that sounded slightly irritated.
Smiling to myself I held the seal in both hands unravelling it to reveal the seal to Lancelot as I announced. "Ladies and gentlemen, I give you Lancelot, fifth son of Lord Eldred of Northumbria." My mental smile stretched onto my lips as I completed the words.
"No, Merlin." Lancelot contradicted shaking his finger at me whilst still holding his apple in the same hand. "No." Lancelot repeated with a heavy sigh, placing the apple and knife down upon the table.
Sighing internally I realised that this may take a little persuasion for Lancelot to see that this was the right thing for him. "Oh, right." I allowed the paper to circle back in on itself. "So you don't want to be a knight, then?" I stated in a questioning manor as I turned away from my friend.
"Of course I do!" Lancelot proclaimed loudly annoyance lacing his tone.
Turning back to face the irritate man I noticed his arms fall to his side as I desperately fought against the grin begging to stretch across my mouth. "Well...the rules don't allow it." I stated causing Lancelot to flinch slightly at the truth he could not fight. Thrusting my arm outwards I stated with excitement. "Damn the rules!" I took a step towards the confused and venerable looking man, I realised he was wavering in his ideals and just needed an extra push. "The rules are wrong!" I concluded with conviction.
"But it's a lie." Lancelot's voice quivered slightly at the beginning of his words. "It's against everything the knights stand for." He continued his arms making a small cross before relaxing back to his sides as if he was physically crossing out the idea.
"You have as much right to be a knight as any man." I stated in a whispery tone stepping forwards as the words left my lips. Lancelot broke eye contact with me, he was obviously mentally battling with himself. "I know it." I revealed the seal in my right hand with my arm reaching towards the friend I was desperately trying to help.
Lancelot's gaze flashed from the seal to me and back as he stepped around the table to place himself a few inches from my extended arm. "But the rules, Merlin." He scolded as he pushed my arm down.
Stepping closer to Lancelot I swapped the seal to my left hand as I placed them in front of me. "We're not breaking the rules." I stated my arms lowering slightly with each word as I forced emphasis upon each of them individually. "We're bending them, that's all." My eyes fluttered quickly as the realisation of how close I was standing to someone who knew I was a woman sunk in. "You get your foot in the door." I continued gesturing towards my foot as I made a stepping motion. "But after that you will be judged on your merit alone." I pointed at Lancelot stating the words in a soft tone, one I hoped would comfort and reassure him. Lancelot met my gaze and my head shuck slightly at the hope I could see burning brightly in his eyes. "And if you succeed - if they make you a knight - it'll be because you earned it, noble or not." I concluded, Lancelot nodded slightly a grin spreading across his face as my words struck at the hopes that lay within him.
Lancelot folded his arms over his chest and seated himself upon the edge of the table. Breaking eye contact with him, I glanced at the floor before turning my gaze to him once more as I pleaded. "I can't change the way things are done around here, but you can..." I paused slightly allowing a silence to fall over us. Leaning forward I noticed Lancelot's eyes run over me as I concluded "if you let me help you." I stated each word in an almost whisper pausing slightly after each one to portray how important they were.
Lancelot allowed a small smile to stretch across his face. "Alright." He stated with an excited nod. "What do I need to do?" he enquired with genuine interest.
A big grin broke across my face at his acceptance, not only of my help but allowing me to do all I could to repay the debt I owed him. "Well first you are going to need some armour, complete with your noble cover." I informed him in a serious tone.
"Where will I get that?" Lancelot enquired a brief flash of confusion and concern whipping across his face.
"I've a friend I can ask." I stated as I stared at nothing in particular, briefly wondering if she would help me deceive everyone. "She should be willing to help." I informed emphasising the 'should'. "Just let me talk to her first." I stated though the words sounded almost like a question from my lips.
"Alright." Lancelot agreed with a brief nod.
Flashing him a grin I turned and exited the chambers, determined to find the one person I thought could help.
Again I'm so sorry that this is all I have, especially with how long I have made you wait for this. I hope you can forgive me.
Reply to Reviews:
red2013: I'm glad you enjoyed it and I completely agree at times it was a little challenging to keep track of what I wanted to happen and where the words were leading me.
Guest: *whistles* What foreshadowing might you be on about, I've no idea. *continues to whistle in a unconvincing manor*
1hotpepper: It makes me so happy to know that you love this story, I'm so sorry that it has taken me so long just to get this out. I think this part has already answered your question. But I have a plan that I'm not 100% how I'll pull of about some people finding out about Merlin's gender. However that's not my main worry at the moment, I'm more worried about disappointing you all and not being able to get past certain things as I'm writing.