Chapter 3: Life's Little Changes
It had been an unexpected call from Kansas City that had Clark on a late train the previous Sunday evening and had Lois sleeping alone, again. But in truth, for the next six months even with Clark away, she would still be sharing their bed with a Kent.
She was really beginning to appreciate what they had done now that he was home and he knew. It helped as well, that she wasn't throwing up every morning any more and having to hide it from her husband's parents.
Lois had always had a strong constitution and Dad liked to tell her that she got it from him. She had to admit that he was probably right, because she never remembered her father ever being sick.
It was because of her good health that a month after she and Clark were married, she became concerned when the smell of her mother in law's coffee sent her to the bathroom and she was on her knees losing her dinner from the night before.
Initially, she thought it might be the flu because the base hospital at Fort Ryan was on alert against another epidemic. The last time there had been an outbreak of the influenza was in 1918 when she and Lucy were little girls. She was only five, but she had a vague memory of her father's worry that he might lose his daughters as well as his wife.
Her mother was slowly dying of cancer and Dad was afraid that she would be taken in the epidemic. Though he admitted to Lois years later that it would have been a mercy to have her taken then, instead of ending up suffering the way she ultimately did.
As had become a habit since she found out she was expecting, Lois found her hand resting gently on her abdomen as she was getting ready for work that early Monday morning. Even though Dr. Francis told her it was much too soon, she wanted to be able to feel something. But he told her she probably wouldn't feel anything for another month and a half.
Truthfully, even though she knew she was going to have a baby, it wasn't really going to hit home until she could feel that new life move inside of her. And if it was at all possible, she wanted Clark home when that happened.
She'd called Lionel the night before to tell him that she would be at the Falcon at her regular time on Monday and asked if he would be there because there were some things she wanted to talk to him about.
He promised to meet her at the club and as she stood in front of the full length mirror trying to zip up her skirt, she found that she couldn't; not quite.
'There goes another skirt for the duration.' She thought and then felt a tear roll down her cheek.
She didn't realize that she was crying until she felt the gentle hands of her mother in law on her arms. "It's all right, Lois." Her soft voice soothed. "When you get home tonight, we'll go through the things you want to keep wearing and we can fix them."
Lois shook her head and brushed the back of her hand against her forehead. "It's so silly."
"What is, honey?" Martha sounded concerned.
"Crying over clothes." She took a deep breath and tried to calm herself. "I was trying so hard to hide all of this until I could tell Clark that I didn't want to admit that my clothes weren't fitting as well. I kept thinking that if I didn't think about it, I could just ignore the whole thing until he got home."
"You know nature doesn't work that way." She gently rubbed Lois's shoulder. "It forges ahead whether you want it to or not."
"I know." She nodded reluctantly, feeling silly at the thought.
"So why the tears, then?"
"I don't know." She shook her head again because she really had no idea.
"I think I might know why." Martha answered and took her hand, leading her to the bed. She sat down and indicated to Lois to sit down next to her before taking her hand again. "You're starting on the greatest journey a woman takes in her life and the end of it; you'll bring a new life into the world. And I think it's only natural at a time like this that a woman wants her mother with her."
"Martha." Lois shook her head again, it wasn't that. "I don't know what I'd do if you weren't here."
"And I appreciate that, more than you know." Her mother in law nodded with a smile. "The truth is; I wouldn't be any where else but here. But the fact remains; I'm not your mother."
"No." She hesitated in saying it, even though it was true. The fact was she didn't want to hurt the woman who had mothered her since Clark had brought her out to the farm all those months ago. "But you're the closest thing I've had to a mother and I'm so glad you are here."
"So am I, Lois." She brushed a lock of hair behind Lois's shoulder. "Because I get to see you carry my first grandchild for the next few months and be there when that little one is born. Thank you."
"I did have a little help in that department." She laughed self-consciously, not wanting to embarrass Clark's mother. It was one thing to say something to fluster her own husband, but Martha Kent was a completely different situation.
"That you did." She laughed with her and grasped Lois' hand warmly in hers. "And he's a very lucky young man to have found you."
"Due in no small part because of the FBI." Lois felt her face warm as the memory of their first meeting flitted across her mind and she sighed. How times had changed.
"What is it?"
"I was just thinking how differently my life would have turned out if Clark hadn't been sent back here." She admitted softly. "I wouldn't have met him, or you and Jonathan. I might not have started talking to Dad again and I certainly wouldn't be carrying this little stowaway." She put her hand on her abdomen and rubbed it gently.
Martha laughed again and raised an eyebrow. "Your father's description, no doubt."
Lois let out an unexpected giggle and nodded again. "That's what he called Michael when we found out Lucy was unexpectedly expecting."
"Your father doesn't mince words, I'll give him that."
"In his line of work, he can't." She shrugged. "That's what he meant when he told you that my mother didn't have time to smooth out the rough edges. With her gone, he didn't have the shelter of a real home to get time away from that part of his life."
"I'm sorry, honey." Martha rubbed her hand sympathetically.
"You don't need to apologize." Lois tried to reassure her. "Lucy and I didn't have the most conventional upbringing, but our kids are going to. And knowing that Dad loves us, even though he has a hard time saying it, makes all the difference."
"You're going to be a wonderful mother, Lois."
"That's what your dopey son said." She shook her head with amusement. "But as long as I have him to help me, I'll be all right."
"That dopey son of mine is going to be a wonderful father, too." Lois got a firm hug from her dopey husband's mother. "In the meantime, I don't want to make you late for work so I'll get out of your way."
When she moved to stand up, Lois grabbed for Martha's hand. She stopped her because it had crept into her mind that if something should ever happen to Clark, not that it would, she'd have his parent's to help her raise their child. But she lost the nerve to voice that thought and instead smiled. "I just wanted you to know how grateful I am to have you and Jonathan as my in laws."
Martha seemed to sense that it wasn't what she really wanted to say, but ultimately said nothing about it. "Jonathan and I are grateful to have you as our in law, too." She flushed at the compliment and then smiled. "If you think you can handle it, I've got breakfast ready downstairs. And if you still can't drink coffee, I'll make you some cocoa instead."
That sounded really good.
And then her stomach gurgled which Clark's mother apparently heard because she laughed out loud. "I'll take that as a yes."
"From the both of us." Lois felt her own face flush with embarrassment, but smiled just the same. "I'll jerry-rig something so I can at least wear my skirt and then find a blouse that I can leave un-tucked and look presentable."
Martha looked thoughtful for a moment before she walked to the closet and sorted through the blouses Lois had hanging there. She came up with something that had short sleeves, a Peter Pan collar and a flared hem.
"How about this? You can wear it out and it won't be obvious." She held it up to show Lois before walking it to the bed and setting it down on the foot. "As far as your skirt is concerned, I'll get a safety pin out of my sewing box and you can use that to close the waistband so it will be comfortable for you."
"It's things like this that make me so happy you're here." Lois smiled gratefully at her and found her hand on her abdomen again. "We both are."
"You can thank me if it works." She laughed softly. "In the meantime, let me get that pin."
Before she could get to the door, there was a knock on the other side. "Lois, Lionel Luthor is downstairs. He said he thought he'd save you a trip into town and talk to you here."
"I'll be down in a minute."
Save her a trip into town? That couldn't be good.
"I'll tell him." Came her father in law's reply and she heard the sound of his work boots thump down the hall as he headed for the stairs.
"Something tells me I'm getting another day off." Lois sighed and picked the blouse up from the bed.
"Honey, if you want to work then tell him so." Martha remarked. "You said he probably suspected that you were going to have a baby, so this might be his way of trying to help."
"He can help by letting me work." She frowned. "Because the more I work, the less time I have to miss Clark when he's not here."
"If that's all it is, I can keep you plenty busy around here." Clark's mother laughed. "Another pair of hands would always be appreciated."
"I'll remember that." Lois sighed and then sat down.
"Are you feeling all right?" She could hear the worry and promptly nodded. "Maybe you should take another day."
"I'm fine, really." She tried to assure the older woman. "I'm still trying to adjust to the idea that I'm not just me anymore. And until I can feel this little one start to move around, the only way I can tell that I'm expecting is that my clothes don't fit anymore."
"We'll do something about that for today and my offer still stands if you want my help with any alterations."
Lois looked at her mother in law and couldn't help but laugh. "Considering that I can't sew to save my life, I'll take you up on that."
"Good. Because it is so much easier to sew now than when my mother was a girl. Sewing machines were still a luxury then and she did her stitching by hand. When I was growing up, she had a treadle machine and I learned pretty quickly that if I didn't keep my foot moving at the same tempo, my stitches would come out uneven. Thank goodness for the electric machines we have now. It makes sewing so much easier."
As Lois listened while Martha talked, she slipped into her blouse and buttoned up the front. She gave herself a critical look in the mirror and was unsure about what she saw.
"You might want to think about getting some flat heeled shoes when you get farther along." She suggested as Lois stepped into a pair of heels. "The extra weight you'll be carrying is going to be hard on your back, as I found out when I was carrying Clark."
"We're going to have to think about a bassinet and a changing table and-" She looked around the room. "And fit it all in here."
"One thing at a time." Martha put her hands on Lois's arms again. "Let's get you squared away first and then we'll start getting things squared away for the baby."
"Okay." Lois nodded her agreement and took another glance in the mirror. "But in the meantime, do I look presentable?"
"You look fine and you look radiant."
She was dubious, to say the least; but there was a bright side. "At least I'm not throwing up as much."
"There is that." Martha laughed and gave Lois another hug. "Why don't you run a brush through your hair and meet me down the hall so we can fix that skirt." She stepped into the hallway and closed the door behind her.
Lois looked at her reflection again and wondered what it was that her mother in law saw. All Lois saw was someone whose complexion was a little too pale and had the faint look of dark circles under her eyes.
The truth of it was, she felt pudgy and that was a new feeling for her. She'd always had to watch her figure because of the form fitting dresses she'd had to wear as a singer and to see that figure disappearing as it changed to accommodate a baby, it was a big adjustment.
But before she could start to feel sorry for herself, what the General would have called weakness; Lois shook herself out of her musings and became annoyed with herself.
It was true that she and Clark hadn't really discussed when they wanted to start a family. And it was also true that it was bound to happen sooner rather than later because they made love so often. Lois felt a smile pull at her lips at the thought because she realized that the old adage about absence making the heart grow fonder was true. And making up for lost time held a whole new meaning for her since they got married.
It wasn't always going to be like that. Because after the baby came, she was going to have to give so much of her attention to their little one and could only hope that Clark would be just as understanding as he was now.
She found her hand on her abdomen again and rubbed a gentle hand across the slight swell as she took one last look before she turned away from the mirror and walked to the door. Martha was standing in the doorway of her bedroom holding up a safety pin as Lois came to a stop on front of her.
"How long do you figure before safety pins are rationed?" She couldn't help but laugh and the older woman smiled back.
"Speaking of pins, you should probably buy diaper pins before they're turned in for a scrap drive." Martha suggested as she turned Lois around. She lifted up the back of her blouse and felt the waistband of her skirt tighten. "Is that too tight?"
"If you'd loosen it just a scooch, I'll be fine." Lois told her and let out a breath she hadn't realized she'd been holding when the waistband slackened. "That's perfect."
A moment later Martha patted her on the back. "You're all set, honey."
"Thank you." Lois dropped the back of her blouse and smoothed it down.
"Lois, you look fine." The words tried to reassure her. "Now head on down to the parlor and I'll finish getting your breakfast together."
"All right." She nodded as Martha walked down the hall toward the staircase going down to the kitchen and she took the stairs down to the front hall.
She saw Jonathan stoking the fire and Lionel was sitting on the couch. She walked into the parlor and when Lionel saw her, he put the mug he'd been holding down on the coffee table and stood up. "Good morning, Lionel. What brings you out here?"
"Good morning, Lois." He smiled at her. "I know we agreed to meet at the Falcon, but under the circumstances I thought it was better if I come out here. In fact, I thought it might be a good idea if you worked at home today, so I brought all the files from your inbox with me."
Maybe being married to an FBI agent was starting to rub off on her because Lois was immediately suspicious; Lionel wouldn't make the offer if he didn't have a reason. And when he pulled her files out of his briefcase and put them on the coffee table, she found out why. "My daughter in law has decided to make her presence felt at the Falcon and I suspect she did it because she wants to make some trouble for you."
Great.
"Hasn't that girl done enough?" Jonathan's irritated voice made Lois start. It wasn't in her father in law's nature to be short tempered. "And now with-"
Lois caught his eye and gave him a subtle shake of her head as she tried to telegraph the message, 'He doesn't know yet'.
He seemed to understand what she was trying to tell him because he nodded and then turned to put the fire screen back in place. "If you want to work in my office today, it's all yours." He turned back and smiled at her. "Martha uses it more than I do anyway."
"Thank you."
"No thanks are necessary, Lois." He put his hand up. "It looks like it's going to snow again, so I'd better get out to the barn and close it up."
Jonathan walked out to the kitchen and Lois heard him laugh. "Martha Kent, are you listening to Ma Perkins again? I thought you told me that those radio serials were nothing but tommyrot."
She answered his laugh and Lois smiled at Martha's cheeky response. "This coming from the man who decides that he needs to take his coffee break at the same time every morning when, strangely enough, Perry Mason just happens to be on."
"Point taken." He chuckled and Lois would bet that he was kissing her cheek. "I'm going to close up the barn and then I need to get the milking done." And he chuckled again. "Unless Lois would like to do it for me."
Lois felt her face warm as she thought about the last time she'd milked the Kent's cow. And before she had a chance to answer, Martha did it for her. "Lois has more important things to do than milk a cow, Jonathan Kent."
"She is an official member of the family now."
"Who is going to-" She stopped suddenly, so Jonathan must have waived her off. And to her credit, she recovered without a hitch. "Be too busy with her paper work to get hand cramp milking."
She saw Lionel with a soft smile on his face and he was shaking his head.
"What is it?" Lois asked him quietly.
"Your mother and father in law." He told her. "They have the kind of relationship that I was too busy to have with my wife. It wasn't until she got sick that I tried to remedy that, but by then it was too late."
"I don't think so, Lionel." Lois tried to reassure him and the look he gave her was one of surprise. "You told me once that the last few months she was alive were the happiest of your life. I'll bet they were the happiest for her, too."
"She was a strong willed woman, my Lillian and she had the biggest heart of anyone I'd ever known. You're very much like her in that way." He patted her hand lightly, almost self-consciously. He then frowned slightly before seeming to give himself a mental shake. "So. What is it that you wanted to talk to me about?"
Here goes nothing.
"You've probably figured it out already, but I wanted you to hear it from me." She took a breath and let it out. "Clark and I are going to have a baby."
"This is wonderful news, my dear." To Lois's surprise, Lionel's eyes began to tear and he blinked to clear them. "Wonderful news. And that is precisely why I felt the need to make the trip out here. With Lana making herself at home at the Falcon again, I would feel more comfortable if you continued your job here at home."
"Lionel." Lois had never run from trouble before and she wasn't about to start now.
"Hear me out, please." He patted her hand again. "I did have the feeling that you were anticipating and because of that, I felt it incumbent upon myself to contact the field office with some unsettling information."
Those somber words sent a chill up her back and Lois didn't like where the conversation was suddenly going. So she took another breath to try and stay calm. "I'm not going to like this, am I?"
"My telephone call was the reason Clark was ordered to Kansas City." His grip tightened. "I overheard my daughter in law making inquiries as to the whereabouts of the person responsible for trying to shoot you all those months ago. She's being very coy about all of it, of course, and has insisted that she's done no such thing. But knowing how she fees about you, I wouldn't be at all surprised."
Lois felt light headed all of a sudden and had the overwhelming urge to throw up. But it wasn't the morning sickness this time. "You'll need to excuse me."
Lionel stood up and pulled her gently up to her feet. "I'm very sorry."
All she could manage to do was nod as she made a beeline for the stairs and rushed up as fast as she was able. Without a second to spare, she slammed the bathroom door behind her in her haste and struggled down to her knees.
This was not how she wanted to start her day.
oooooo
He'd been there before and the sense of déjà vu didn't escape him.
Clark sat out side Director Kelly's office and had to curb the urge to look at his watch. Those sorts of things didn't go unnoticed and it wouldn't serve him well because he was already annoyed at having been called back when he'd just started his leave.
It never used to be an issue, because he didn't have a personal life to speak of. The job was all he had and Clark had preferred it that way. It meant no serious entanglements to get in the way of being able to do his job and it had worked like a charm until he was sent back to Kansas on a temporary assignment.
Meeting Lois had changed all of that and he smiled.
He heard the desk phone of Mr. Kelly's secretary buzz and she picked up the receiver. She nodded and then glanced over at Clark. "Yes, sir. He's here." And she nodded again. "I'll send him right in." She replaced the receiver and smiled at him. "Agent Kent, the Director is ready to see you now."
"Thank you." He stood up, gripping his hat in his hand. He walked to the door and opened it, stepping into Mr. Kelly's office and was motioned to his desk. Clark stopped again, feeling as though history were repeating itself. "Sir, you wanted to see me?"
"Have a seat, Kent." He indicated a chair. "How is your lovely wife?"
"She's fine, sir." Clark frowned in confusion as he sat down, because he knew he hadn't been called into the field director's office just to be asked about Lois.
"That's good." He nodded and got a look on his face that told Clark he didn't have good news. "I'm going to need you to stay in Smallville for awhile and keep an eye on her."
"Keep an eye on her?" He tried to keep his voice level as he felt his heart squeeze in his chest and not sound like a panicked husband, which at the moment he was because he couldn't help but think about the baby. "Why?"
"There is a very real possibility that your wife may be in harms way again." He was too matter of fact for Clark's liking.
"Sir?"
"Lionel Luthor called me Saturday afternoon to tell me that she may be in the cross-hairs of his daughter in law."
Lana.
"I'm not sure I understand." In fact Clark did, but his affair with her had never been common knowledge."
"I think you do, son."
Or maybe not.
"The name of this organization you and I serve is the Federal Bureau of Investigation." He sighed and sat back. "But the letters FBI also stand for Fidelity, Bravery and Integrity."
He made a point of emphasizing the last word.
"Yes, sir."
"Kent, we don't expect our unmarried agents to live like monks. But we do expect them to have a modicum of discretion and certainly, better sense than to become involved with married women." The Director's voice rose in agitation and Clark knew he was in serious trouble.
"Yes, sir." He said again; what else could he say? "I don't suppose I need to ask how you found out about that."
Mr. Kelly shook his head. "He wouldn't have said anything if it weren't pertinent to the situation, because it didn't make a lot of sense to me why the wife of a saloon owner would go after the girl who used to be their singer."
"I hadn't seen Lana for a few weeks before I went to talk to Lois that night."
"And do I need to ask if you became romantically involved with Mrs. Kent while the case was still ongoing?"
"No." His short answer was tantamount to a confession.
"You know I should take your shield for this." He told Clark something he already knew and was vaguely surprised that it never happened. "If you weren't one of our best field agents and had a spotless record, your ass would be out my office door faster than you could say 'Tokyo Rose'." He looked more disappointed than upset and it was a reminder of how his parents had felt. "Were you intimate with your wife before you were married?"
"No, sir." But it wasn't because he hadn't thought about it. "We waited."
"It's all water under the bridge now." He sat forward with another sigh and rest his forearms on the desk. "This unsavory business of your dalliance with the Luthor woman will stay between us and won't be put into your service record, even though it should."
"I appreciate that, sir."
"I don't want your appreciation." He waved a dismissive hand. "Now the information Lionel Luthor relayed to me indicates that Lana Luthor may be trying to ascertain the whereabouts of the shooter who went after your wife."
"Why-" Clark started to ask and then stopped.
'Why do you think?' He asked himself and then started to shake. Fear and rage were suddenly warring inside of him and if Clark were completely honest, guilt as well. Because of him and his indiscretion, Lois was again unsafe. But this time, it wasn't just her; their baby could be in danger, too.
"I'm sending you back to The Daily Planet to resume your cover as a reporter and to find out who the hell this fellow is since we never caught him the first time. Perry White knows you're coming and he'll expect you bright and early Monday morning."
That meant he was going to be wearing those glasses again. Great.
"I don't suppose I have a say about this."
"No." Came the short answer. "Given the resources that the Planet has, it should help you in finding whoever Mrs. Luthor is trying to contact."
"Sir, there is something you should know, in light of the circumstances." Clark hesitated for a moment. "My wife and I are going to have a baby."
To say that he looked stunned would be putting it mildly and then almost under his breath, he swore. "Damn. That's the cherry on the sundae, isn't it?" And given what Lionel Luthor has told me, that wouldn't go over very well with his daughter in law, would it?"
"Can't we arrest her? Since it's not exactly a secret what she may do-"
"We need solid proof, Kent. You know that." He sat back in his chair. "But all we have at the moment is hearsay. If we could find out who that shooter is and get a hold of him before she does, he might give us the Luthor woman if we offered him a deal."
"As long as Lois stays at the farm, she'll be safe." Clark sat forward. "Unless Lana had me followed, she doesn't know where I live."
"The operative word being unless, so here's what we're going to do. We'll put a couple of agents out at your parent's farm and if anyone asks, they're hired hands."
Clark shook his head. "That won't work. None of the farmers in Lowell County can afford to hire extra hands, so they all help each other out."
"Then what would you suggest?"
"I think it would make sense to use me. I already live at the farm and people in Smallville know me so I'd be able to come and go without any notice. If there were any strangers near my parent's place, they would be told and since my wife trusts me, she won't argue with me."
"I take it she gave you a hard time when you first took her out to the farm?" A shadow of a smile crossed his face, but just as quickly it was gone.
"She let me know she wasn't happy with my decision." He recalled. "But when I made it clear that she could have ended up dead, she saw reason."
"It was that close?"
Clark nodded and remembered how worried for her he'd been, even though he didn't know her yet. "A couple of feet, at most."
"That close." He blew out a breath and then sat up. "I usually refrain from assigning agents to guard family members. But it seems to me that with what you and your wife have at stake, you'll both do what you need to keep her safe and hopefully we can put that little hellion behind bars where she should have stayed after she shot you."
"He didn't say as much, but I think Mr. Luthor believes he owes it to Lex."
"That doesn't make sense, because the Luthor marriage isn't exactly a happy one."
Clark shrugged. "Lois told me that he feels guilty because he wasn't around much when Lex was growing up and maybe in his own way thought he was making it up to him."
"Even though Luthor hates his wife?" Mr. Kelly looked at him with a perplexed look on his face. "I have to admit I don't understand that."
"I don't either." He shifted in his seat uncomfortably, knowing more about the situation than he wished he did. "But I do know that they had to get married."
"Ah, the proverbial shot gun wedding." He nodded his head. "Not the best way to start off a marriage. But I've never heard mention of a Luthor grandchild."
"That's because she miscarried not long after they got married."
"And I gather not long after that, she set her sights on you?" He raised his eyebrows in question.
"Sir, I'm not going to make excuses for my bad judgment because I did know better." Clark wanted to explain. "But I'd never gotten that kind of attention from a woman before and I didn't realize she was married-"
"Until after she reeled you in." Mr. Kelly seemed to understand his predicament and nodded. "So would you care to explain how you let yourself get involved with the woman who became your wife?"
"It's simple, really. She decided to help me with my investigation because she wanted to go home." Clark couldn't help but smile at the memory. "And at the time, I'd gotten someone else's attention and couldn't get her to understand that I didn't see her that way. So when Lois showed up one morning at the Planet, I introduced her as my girl."
"And having met her, I can see why you fell for her." He remarked and leaned forward, putting his hands down flat on his desk. "All right. So, are all your cards on the table now? I'm not going to be blindsided by some other revelation?"
"No, sir. That's it." Clark let out a sigh and for the first time since he'd told Lois about his indiscretion with Lana, he felt like he could finally breathe. He wasn't hiding from it anymore.
The Director stood up and put out his hand. When Clark stood up and took it, he was frowning again. "If there is anything you need, don't hesitate to contact me. I'll have to report this situation to the pencil pushers in Washington because it involves an agent. But I'll explain that it has to do with Mrs. Kent's role in convicting Luthor, they don't need to know the real reason."
"Yes, sir."
"You'd better get home and tell your wife about this." He stepped from behind the desk and walked to his office door. "It also means that your leave has been effectively cancelled and you're back on duty, at home and at the Planet."
Clark was hoping he'd changed his mind about that.
"Kent, we all make mistakes and it's what we learn from those mistakes that make us better agents. And I expect that once this matter is resolved, you'll be a greater asset to us than ever." And he opened the door.
"Thank you, sir."
"Give my best to your wife and my congratulations."
"I'll do that." They shook hands again before Clark stepped out of the office and the door was closed behind him.
He caught the first train he could back to Smallville after he called his father asking him to meet him at the station, making the decision not to go into any details about his meeting with the field director until they got back to the farm.
As the train rolled into the station the next afternoon, he caught a glimpse not only of his father, but his wife as well, both waiting for him on the platform.
And as it always did when he saw her, his heart hitched in his chest.
She wasn't showing yet, but the fact that she was expecting made her even more beautiful. Or was it the fact that it was his baby she was expecting? It didn't really matter because they were both his, anyway.
He'd never felt so possessive before about anyone in his life and it was still such a new feeling for him. But he knew the possessive streak Lois had about him was just as strong.
Metal wheels screeched against metal rails as the train came to a slow, lumbering stop and when the train finally stopped jerking, Clark bent over to pick up his suitcase. And after he straightened up again and looked out the window of the Dutch door, Dad was nowhere to be found. But Lois was still there, standing by herself.
She looked too pale for his liking and he wondered how bad her morning sickness was. Before he'd been called to Kansas City he'd gotten up in the early morning hours when he heard her bolt for the bathroom and helped her through the ordeal, over her tearful objections. She kept trying to reassure him that she was fine, but even his mother had looked a little worried later in the day when she would disappear without warning.
Dad was the only one who seemed not to be overly concerned and reminded him and his mother that if something were really wrong, Lois would let them know. 'We all love her and want what's best for her.' He'd told them. 'But if we hover around like a gaggle of mother hens, it's just going to make her anxious.'
He was right, of course. But it still didn't stop the troubled look that furrowed his father's brow as he peaked surreptitiously around the morning addition of the Smallville Ledger, his eyes following her up the stairs.
And his parent's did love her; Clark had no doubt in his mind about that. Even before she found out she was expecting, they'd treated her no differently than they treated their own son and it was one of the things Lois loved so much about them. They treated her like a daughter.
"Hi ya, Handsome." Lois smiled at him as Clark stepped off the train and stopped in front of her, setting his suitcase down.
She hadn't called him that in a while and he smiled back. "Hi ya, Gorgeous. Miss me?"
"How can I miss you when I have a constant reminder of you?" She giggled as he picked her up and the feel of her arms around his neck made him sigh with contentment. He was home.
"In case you've forgotten, I did have some help from you." He should have thought about how it would look before he nuzzled her neck and caught the scent of lilacs.
"Clark." Her soft whisper in his ear reminded him of where they were and he set her down, reluctantly. He knew he should apologize, but couldn't bring himself to do it and her gloved hand touched his cheek; her face flushed. "I know."
"Let's get home." He picked up his suitcase with one hand and took Lois' hand with the other. It wasn't often that he held her hand; she usually took his arm, but that afternoon he wanted to feel the reassuring press of her hand against his, gloves or not.
They walked quietly, hand in hand down the platform toward his father's truck and he wanted so much to tell her what he'd found out; but it wasn't something he could mention casually. He felt it would be better if he sat her and his parents down once he got back to the farm and told them what Mr. Kelly had told him.
"Clark? Honey, we need to talk." Honey? Lois never called him 'honey'. And the way she sighed put him on alert because he immediately thought something might have happened with the baby and she didn't know how to tell him.
"Are you all right?" He blurted out, not thinking how it might sound and her troubled look made him worry even more. "Is it the-?"
"We're both fine, really." She interrupted him with a nod. "But there is someone who isn't fine. In fact she's-"
"Lana." It was a stab in the dark, but it was the only thing he could think of.
"He should have let the judge put her in that loony bin and thrown away the key." She stopped and gripped his hand. "Lionel came to talk to me yesterday. Apparently, Lana has started showing up at the Falcon and he thinks she's doing it to make trouble for us."
"Hasn't she done enough?" He grasped Lois' hand tightly in his. How much longer was he going to have to pay for the mistake he made? "And why isn't she under home confinement?"
The question was rhetorical, but she answered just the same.
"I don't know."
"And what happens when she finds out about the baby?" He glanced down at the front of her coat and then back up into her eyes. "What happens when you start showing?"
He had this sudden and very unsettling vision of Lois taking a header down a flight of stairs and wondered if Lana was really capable of giving her that push.
It worried him that he was so certain of the answer.
"That's why he came to see me." Lois' soft voice shook him out of his musing. "He wants me to work from the farm for the time being. He thinks it would be better for the both of us."
Her and the baby is what she meant.
"Lois." Clark gave her a stern look and knew he was about to ask the impossible.
"Don't even think about it, buster." She read his unspoken thought and shook her head as she started to walk again, pulling him behind her. "I'm not quitting."
"Lois, I wouldn't even think to mention it if it were just about you because I know you can take care of yourself. But-"
She cut him off as she stopped again and this time, let go of his hand to put hers on the front her coat. "Are you saying I can't take care of this little one?"
"I'm not saying that at all." He shook his head and knew a storm was brewing; a bad one. "I'm just saying that you don't always think before you jump headlong into something."
And the moment the words came out, the storm broke.
Good one, Kent.
"You are saying that." The look on her face made him wince because she was all at once angry and deeply disappointed in him. "I thought we knew each other better than that."
"We do, it's just that-"
"It's just that, what?" She stormed down the platform, tossing the words over her shoulder. "I'm irresponsible, impetuous, stubborn?"
"Not irresponsible." It was bad enough that he'd started digging himself into a hole, but why did he insist on making it deeper?
"But I'm impetuous and stubborn?" She kept walking and Clark couldn't remember ever seeing her so angry.
'Well whose fault is that?' He asked himself and sighed as he tried to keep up with her. And yet his brain wasn't sending the signal for him to shut up because he was getting angry, too. "Yes."
He stopped her by grabbing her arm and turned her to face him. "You seem to forget that when you were under protective custody at my parent's farm, you took a train into Metropolis without telling me and worried them half to death. The whole idea of you being there was so that Lex would believe you were staying with your father."
"I was trying to help." She wouldn't back down and he couldn't help but admire her for it.
"All you did was complicate things." He replied and if he hadn't been so worked up, would have immediately regretted the remark. It was because she'd tried to help that he now had a wife who was expecting their baby.
"And things weren't already complicated?" She pulled her arm out of his grip and leaned close; her eyes flashing with anger as she kept her voice low. "You were intimate with someone who was married! You were taking another man's wife into your bed and-" She stopped for a moment and took a deep breath.
"When I was still singing, there were some people that assumed that Lex and I-" Her face flushed a deep red and she stepped back. "But we never did because I had better judgment than some people I know."
And with that, she turned on her heel and walked the rest of the way on her own, while Clark stood there, stunned. They'd just had their first real fight since they'd been married and he felt sick to his stomach.
It was the first time she'd thrown his affair in his face and he knew he deserved it. She'd never said anything like it before because she'd often told him that it wasn't any of her business.
But it didn't stop her from being hurt and it hurt him knowing he was responsible for that.
By the time he got to his father's truck, Lois was already inside the cab and her face was still flushed. He'd bet that she was making a Herculean effort not to cry in front of Dad and it showed.
After he laid his suitcase down in the truck bed, he opened the door and got in. Lois sat up ramrod straight and he knew she was trying not to touch him. Dad gave him a curious look, but Clark shook his head. This was between him and Lois and unless she chose to share, he wasn't going to.
On the drive back to the farm, his father made small talk to try and relieve the tension but Clark wasn't in the mood to talk and Lois refused to look at him. He kept his attention out the passenger side window and as they neared his parent's farm, he saw Mr. Hubbard out in one of his fields plowing under the soil to get it ready for spring planting.
Sometimes he wondered what his life would have been like if he'd chosen to stay on the farm to run it alongside his father. Unfulfilling, came the answer because if he'd stayed on the farm he never would have met Lois.
He closed his eyes the rest of the way home because he couldn't bear that his wife was ignoring him.
He felt the truck turn as Dad drove up the lane toward the house and then felt it stop. The silence was almost explosive as he shut down the engine and Clark heard the driver's side door open.
"I'll get your suitcase for you." The sound of his father's voice got him to open his eyes and he fully expected Lois to follow him out. But as he closed his door, Lois stayed where she was.
He didn't know how long they sat there before he heard her sigh. "I love you."
"I love you, too." He answered, not sure if the storm had passed.
"But right now, I can't stand the sight of you."
It hadn't.
"I know." He nodded his understanding.
"And just so you know, you're on the sofa." She scoot over and opened the driver's side door. "I only want to sleep with one Kent tonight."
And she slammed it shut.
He was such an idiot.