A/N: I am so mad at this chapter. As a personal preference I dislike it. I tried to change it and rewrite it(2 times) and each time ended the same way. I am so mad at Red right now, it isn't even funny. He just does what he wants and I have nothing to do with it. *Sigh* If I didn't love him so much…

Let me know what you think.

Disclaimed, as always.

Chapter 17

Red's rehabilitation took much longer than anticipated. He could walk and move, but some of his fine motor skills were lagging behind.

Seven weeks later and he was still having issues.

After having scan after scan done, the specialists explained that he would regain them in full, it would just take time.

Time was something Red had no patience for and Lizzie didn't have because he was being such a terrible patient.

Red needed assistance with buttoning his shirts and vests and tying his shoes. This was unacceptable to him and he constantly snapped at Lizzie.

She knew that his pride was hurt that he had to depend on someone, but she loved him and she didn't give a damn what he wanted. She wished he would just shut up and accept her help.

"Elizabeth, let the nurse take care it. That's what I am paying her for. For god's sake, stop it! Get out!" He shouted at her, but her face was placid. She ignored his temperamental display.

She kept her voice even as she replied "I love you too, Red…and besides, I'm paying her. You died and left me all of your money, remember?"

"I don't want you here." She stood after finishing up his shoes, kissed him on the top of his head and said "I'm going to the store, do you want to come with me?"

"No, I don't. So someone can mistake me for your father again? I think I'll pass."

He was so touchy lately. Liz thought she was doing an admirable job at not stabbing him again. "Good, because I wasn't talking to you, sourpuss. Dembe?"

Dembe laughed "Sure, although I hate to leave such pleasant company." They walked out of the room to Red flipping them the bird.

Liz took the first few minutes of their trip to cry in Dembe's arms. Red was miserable. She was miserable.

"Why is he so damn mean all the time?! I love him and all he does is shit on everything that I am doing. Why can't he realize that I am not going to leave and I still want to be with him? I don't care if he can't button his stupid buttons. I am just so happy he's alive."

She vented and sobbed as Dembe said "You know he loves you. He's being so difficult because he thinks that you deserve better. Don't let him push you away. You know he loves you more than anything.

He hated that he wasn't yet one hundred percent. He was taking out his fear and loss of control out on everyone around him. Dembe and she put up with him the best, since they loved him to begin with.

Dembe just cajoled and charmed Red with his smile and loyalty. Liz and Red were still new to their relationship when he took off to play hero with the Cabal. As a result, she wasn't so confident in where they stood. He never told her he loved her after that first time he woke up.

He never showed her affection any more or even let her believe that she was anything more than a nuisance. A person could only take so much.

They returned from the store with Liz in much better spirits since crying it out with Dembe. She walked into Red's room with a smile while looking down and rummaging through a bag she carried "Hey, we're back. I got you some of those Chocolate Covered Blueberries that you love-"

She looked up at Red and saw that he was sitting up in front of the fireplace in his room, with his nurse in his lap and his hand cupping her ass.

As Red watched the blood drain form Lizzie's face, he knew that he'd just made the biggest mistake of his entire life.

The nurse was nobody. She didn't know the strong man Red used to be so had no basis on which to pity him. Lizzie was his everything. But she also had first-hand knowledge of just how far he's fallen.

He's used the nurse as a flirtatious diversion. A means to remember that he still had something worthy to offer a woman.

Lizzie deserved more from a man than a lifetime of playing nursemaid. He loved her too much to hang those chains from her. So he'd been trying to push her away since he realized he couldn't do some things, like buttons and shoelaces.

Judging by the look on her face, he had just fucked up the best thing that ever happened to him. He loved her so much and that was it. She was too strong, too independent to let this go.

And of course, Dembe walked in behind Lizzie

"Lizzie, god, I'm-"

"Shut up." She walked over to them. The nurse scrambled off his lap and walked a wide berth around Lizzie as she practically ran from the room.

Lizzie look at him "She's fired."

"Done. I-"

She shook her head "I didn't tell you to talk. She is fired and you and I?" She watched as his eyes closed in resignation, maybe even trepidation.

Her voice lowered as tears gathered in her eyes "Do you want me gone? Really gone? Because if I leave here, you will never see me again. I have to know if that is something you really want, because I am no longer willing to play the game by your rules."

He wiped at his eyes "I never wanted you gone Lizzie. You deserve so much more than me."

She sniffled "So if I were hit by a car and was paralyzed, you would want to leave?"

His face was horrified "NO! Of course not! I would never leave you."

"Does my love mean so little? Do you think me incapable of loving you? Is it me, is that it? If you don't want to be with me, I expect you to respect me enough to tell me."

He stood and walked slowly to her. His limp was slightly better than yesterday. "Lizzie, I am so sorry. I'm a brain damaged fool and I can't stand the thought of not being able to be the man that you deserve….I am terrified that I won't ever get better and you'll be stuck with me forever."

She hugged him tightly as she said into his shirt "You aren't brain damaged, you're an ass. There's a difference. You're mine though, and if I ever walk in on you touching another woman, you'll need more than just one nurse, because I will be gone so fast you'll never find me. Clear?"

His arms tightened around her almost painfully "Crystal. I love…I love you so much Lizzie. I'm so sorry."

"I love you too. You need to talk to me Red. If you're having a problem, the only way we're going to get through this is by communicating."

She had forgotten that Dembe was behind them until he said "You forgive Raymond too soon. It's ok though, I won't" and walked out of the room.

Tbc…

One more chapter. Let me know what you think!