To Obito's great surprise, Mikoto adored the potted plant, now deemed 'Mr. Ukki', and had placed it at the center of the table. As a result, he had to make sure to avoid the broad green leaves as he reached over to get another helping of mackerel.
"This is delicious," he said, then took another bite. He wasn't just saying it to be polite. Mikoto's cooking had always been wonderful, though he hadn't had a lot of opportunity to get a taste as a kid. From what he remembered, Fugaku had never really liked him. But again, neither did the majority of the Uchiha clan.
Mikoto smiled gently. "I'm glad you think so, Obito-kun." She seemed to have no problems with addressing a full-grown man the same way she did the short, bratty kid he had been decades ago. He had always liked that about Mikoto - and tried to block out the memories of another Mikoto, this one with blood trickling out from her mouth as she clutched the fatal wound in her stomach, dealt by her beloved elder son.
He shoved a piece of mackerel in his mouth in a valiant attempt to distract himself.
"Obito," Fugaku said, "I have to admit, I'm quite curious as to how you got those scars. They look different from most kinds I have encountered before."
Probably because nobody else you've met survived having an entire half of their body crushed under rock, Obito thought to himself. "I was injured on a mission," he said out loud. "It was pretty traumatic. I don't remember much about what happened. I'm not really sure how I survived, but I'm glad I did." That, at least, was not a lie - at least, not entirely a lie. He wasn't really sure if him surviving was a good thing, knowing the disasters he had helped facilitate, the deaths he helped cause.
The other man 'hmm'ed in the way people do in order to show interest when they felt no such thing. "I suppose medical ninjutsu must have improved quite a lot in that time. That scarring looks too severe to be anything survivable in this time."
"Ha ha," said Obito uncomfortably. "It most certainly did." He decided to leave out how said injury would occur in roughly a week from now and how the way he had survived could barely be considered medical ninjutsu. Well, depending on whether fusing a plant clone of Senju Hashirama onto one's body is medical ninjutsu.
"I don't mean to pry," Mikoto began, "and I understand if you - either of you - feel uncomfortable answering, but I just want to ask the question on all of our minds right now. How did you and Kakashi-kun get together? You two don't seem to get along very well in this time, from what the younger you have told me."
Obito exchanged an awkward look with Kakashi. You do it, said the other man's stare. "...I was at a very bad time in my life," he said slowly. "I made some bad decisions and associated with some people I shouldn't have -" Like an entire organization of S-ranked shinobi. "- and I was trying to make up for my mistakes. Kakashi supported me a lot during that time -" Like convincing the shinobi world that the man who tried putting the entire world under a genjutsu should be allowed to live. "- and... what can I say." He shrugged. "We got closer, and one day, it just happened."
"It was a very unique set of circumstances," Kakashi added. His mask was off. All it took was one admonishment from Mikoto about manners at the dinner table.
Mikoto looked touched. "That's very romantic," she told them. "It feels like something right out of a book."
"...If you say so," he muttered.
"But Obito-kun, I want to tell you that I'm very proud of you for being as strong as you were," she said. Obito stared at her, utterly confused. "Life as a shinobi is very difficult. I've known a lot of shinobi who have resorted to drugs, and I'm really glad you didn't continue down that path."
He stared. Kakashi choked on his rice in the background. "T-that's not what I meant at all!" Obito managed, eyes wide.
"It's alright, Obito-kun. You don't have to be ashamed." Mikoto smiled beatifically. He flushed red. "No, really, I -"
Kakashi kicked him under the table. Go with it, he mouthed. Obito scowled. Hell no, he mouthed back.
"What Obito here means to say," the Hatake interjected smoothly, "is that that part of his past is something he doesn't like to dwell upon. He likes to focus on the present." And then, in a stage whisper, "He refuses to go to therapy for it."
Mikoto nodded understandingly. "Ah, I understand completely. Shinobi do have that tendency, don't they? But Obito, I want to congratulate you. Back in my day, we actually covered those topics in the Academy. I know it's hard to face the real world sometimes, but it's not worth it to get caught up in an illusion - like the kind drugs will trap you in."
Obito twitched. Seriously? This is what they were going with? At least it was better than the truth... He just wished he didn't have to make himself out to be a drug addict in order to keep that under wraps. "...Thank you, Mikoto-san," he said finally. "...Er, how are things going with your family?" Alright, so it was a pretty horrible attempt at conversation. At least he was trying, unlike the silver-haired jerk on the other side of the table.
"We're fine! Itachi-chan's probably going to start at the Academy in a year or two, seeing how he's been doing so far. He's only three, but he's already bored with staying at home all day, and he's been hounding us about when we will let him go to school like the older kids." She sighed. "But he's going to be a lot younger than his classmates, and I worry..."
"He will be alright," he couldn't help but reassure. "Trust me, Itachi-chan will do well." Very well. In fact, he'll end up making ANBU captain at 13 and be forced to slaughter his clan soon after.
...Sometimes, Obito just hated his memory.
"Hm? Oh, is this one of those future things?" Mikoto laughed softly. "Thank you for reassuring me, but you don't have to tell us about the future if you don't want to. In fact, I think I'd rather face things as they come."
Obito's heart twisted. If only you knew. But still, he felt relieved. Maybe Fugaku wouldn't ask him the question he had been fearing the whole dinner.
"However, I would still like to know what happened to your eye, Obito."
...Or maybe not. Crap. "My eye is doing great, Fugaku-san," he said in a lame attempt to avoid the question.
"Your other eye, Obito. The one that's not there anymore."
Obito experienced the depressing realization that Fugaku's snark was just as biting as ever. "...I lost it on a mission," he said finally, with the tone of a man going to meet his executioner. "It was the same incident in which I got my scars."
"Ah, I see. I'm sorry for your loss. Pardon me, but... did you ever end up activating your Sharingan?"
"Yeah, eventually -" That reaction was a hell of a lot milder than he had imagined. He couldn't help but ask, "That's it?"
"What's it?"
"You know, me losing an eye..."
Fugaku laughed, the friendliest he had sounded the whole meal. "You can't possible believe that I would admonish you for losing an eye in battle! Look, there's plenty of Uchiha around who have suffered eye injuries on their missions - it's what our enemies aim for, considering our abilities. Besides, it's not as if you gave a perfectly good Sharingan to a non-Uchiha, or something. Ha ha."
"Ha ha," Obito echoed emptily. "Yeah, or something." Damn.
He kicked Kakashi under the table. If you ever lift that headband of yours, I'm dead. To his dismay, the other man ignored him.
"Kakashi-kun, am I right in saying that you're a jounin?"
"Ah, yes, you would be correct. I am Hatake Kakashi, jounin under the command of the Godaime."
"...Godaime?" Mikoto quirked an eyebrow. "Already? Anyhow... Obito-kun, I've noticed that you're not wearing a hitai-ate. Are you still a shinobi?"
"Er, I retired a while ago," Obito stammered. "After my injury, a lot of people thought the shinobi life wasn't suitable for me anymore." Technically, not a lie. There just happens to be a bit more to that...
Fugaku snorted in disapproval. His wife smacked him playfully. "Don't be rude! There's nothing wrong for Obito to retire a little bit early. I retired from the Shinobi Corps, remember?"
"Yes, but that's different," the man defended himself lamely. Mikoto huffed in amusement.
Obito had to admit, seeing the head of the Uchiha clan get whipped by a housewife never stopped being amusing.
Said housewife turned back towards them. "I have to say, you and Kakashi-kun have changed a lot. It must be getting old by now, but... he's certainly a lot more laid back than he is now, and you - no offense meant, but -"
"I'm not a stupid kid anymore?" He asked, a mock shocked expression on his face. "It's alright. I know. Life changes people. I got betrayed by some people I trusted, found out that things weren't what they seemed at first glance, and learned to think for myself. With that said, I'm sorry for being such a brat to you as a kid. I suppose it's karma or something - there's a kid I know in the future who reminds me a lot of myself, and I find him annoying as he - heck."
"Naruto's not exactly a kid anymore, Obito." Kakashi added.
"...Naruto? What kind of parent would name their child after a ramen topping?" She laughed mirthfully. "I should tell Kushina about it. Maybe there's someone in the world more obsessed with ramen than her."
Obito's grin tightened. "...I don't know if that's a good idea to tell her. Maybe she might end up naming her kids after ramen too." Better safe than sorry. What if Minato-sensei decides not to name his son Naruto because Kushina was the one to suggest the name?
Mikoto gave him an odd look. "...If you say so, Obito-kun. But honestly, I don't think even Kushina would be that crazy." She laughed. Obito didn't.
An awkward silence prevailed. "Er, do you want me to help with the dishes?" Obito asked finally, eyeing the now empty bowls around the table. Then, seeing the other's expression, added, "I insist."
"You are the guest, Obito-kun -"
"Which is exactly why I should be helping," he argued.
Mikoto sighed. "...Alright, if you really want to."
He knew that helping wash the dishes didn't help absolve his past sins in any way. But doing so would get him away from the incredibly awkward, not to mention dangerous, environment around the dining table. With the skill of a trained shinobi, Obito maneuvered a stack of plates, glasses, and utensils toward the sink, careful not to dump everything in at the same time. He learned his lesson before.
Obito was suddenly glad that he no longer dressed in his usual loose clothing, which helped decrease the noticeability of his scars, but also got themselves stained much easier than he would like.
He absentmindedly swirled the sponge over the dishes, wiping off oil and clingy food bits. Distantly, he could hear the faint murmur of talking - probably Kakashi getting intensely interrogated. Say what you will about the Uchiha clan, but they were protective of their own. Some called it altruism, others just called it selfishness. No doubt, the leaders of the Uchiha clan wanted to see if the Hatake was worthy.
He smirked to himself. Revenge is a dish best served cold.
A while later, Obito wiped off his hands as he looked at the mound of sparkling clean dishes in satisfaction. He never really understood why most people disliked the chore. Even as a kid, the Uchiha enjoyed purifying the unclean - or in this case, making dirty dishes clean and sparkling again.
"You work really fast," Mikoto commented as she made her way into the kitchen.
He grinned at the praise. "I've had a lot of practice. I've been mostly taking care of myself since I was a kid. My parents weren't home for the majority of the time." And then I got crushed under a rock and never saw them again. They probably died on another one of their missions between that time and when I... came back.
She sighed. "...I told Koichi and Aika that it wasn't good to leave you home alone for so long at a time. I was worried." A smile. "But you grew up to a mature, nice young man. Maybe my concerns were unfounded."
A lot of people would disagree with you on the nice part, Obito thought silently to himself. "I'm thirty," he said, "that's not really young."
Mikoto looked at him with mock anger. "Thirty? Old? You're barely older than I am! Are you insinuating something about my age?"
"No! Of course not!" He backpedaled quickly.
She laughed brightly. "Calm down, I'm just joking with you."
Obito relaxed. You could never be too careful. Even with Rin... he shivered.
The murmur of voices outside ceased. "I think we're done for tonight," said Obito. "I... I really enjoyed the meal." He was tempted to say that he wanted to return the favor, but he doubted that they would stay in the same place after the Kannabi Bridge fiasco.
"Well, I enjoyed your and Kakashi's company tonight. You two - both of you - are welcome here whenever you want, hear?"
He nodded. Mikoto pulled him into a hug. "Try not to do anything stupid, Obito-kun."
Dammit.
"You knew they were going to do that," Kakashi accused. "A great person you are, leaving me to the mercy of Uchiha Fugaku and Mikoto."
"I had no idea," Obito told him unconvincingly. "I take it you passed?"
"They were worse than Morino Ibiki," the other man complained. "I would know. I had to get interrogated by him to get in the Corps. I would undergo another round under him willingly. Them... not so much."
"They aren't that bad," he defended.
"...Says the man who abandoned me to their delicate mercies," Kakashi deadpanned. "But in all honesty, that didn't turn out as badly as you've lead me to believe."
"I'm just glad she didn't ask more about our future." Obito sighed. "If only everyone else would follow her example." He wasn't looking forward to the eventual interaction with Team Minato. "Speaking of which, have you seen the kid you around?"
"Now that you brought it up..." the other man replied slowly, "I haven't seen him. Haven't seen your younger self either..."
"Aw, crap." Kakashi looked at him questioningly. "I know me, okay? If something like this happened when I was his age, I would have flipped a shit. The only reason for him not confronting us is if he was planning something. And, knowing me, it's probably something completely idiotic."
"I like kid you," the jounin protested.
Obito rolled his eyes. "I remember, alright? You spent that whole fight we had in the Kamui dimension talking about it. I came out of it with a fatal wound. Wasn't something I could easily forget."
"In my defense," Kakashi pointed out, "you were trying to kill me too."
"...Alright, so I deserved it. Sure, I spouted a lot of inspirational bullshit as a kid. Doesn't change the fact that kid me was a stupid, naive little shit."
"I wouldn't use thosewords exactly. I based the majority of my life after some of your 'inspirational bullshit' -" He blinked. "...Did you hear that?"
"...Is there someone in those bushes?" Obito stared at said bushes quizzically, then kicked at them. "Er. I don't feel anything."
"Huh," Kakashi said.
Another rustle. Obito whirled around. "Oh crap, I think those sounds are coming from that tree - oof!" The wooden bat collided with the small of his back, knocking the wind out of him.
"Get away from Kakashi-teme!" Shouted a very familiar, very shrill male voice.
"...Obito, I changed my mind," Kakashi said, staring at a certain goggle-wearing Uchiha holding a bat in a two - handed grip. "You were a stupid kid."